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Wow, we are really here. We're here. We're queer. And we are joined. All right. Well, first, welcome back to the ball and the beautiful. We are too faggy bald thugs who had the distinct pleasure and incredible honor to be joined by two gorgeous and beautiful ladies who have a full head of hair. Each have absolutely except for a tiny piece in the front of my head. So, in essence, all in hiding closet.
Can I please serenade you very quickly? Yes, please. Absolutely. Please. Congratulations. Oh, that was mostly applause. Oh, shit. It was beautiful. I think one congratulation to you. Thank you. And I was and then I was thinking that you were going to think about why am I still in this amazing voice right now? You sound like you're selling something is like right now we're we're selling shade buttons and we have one. And you think I'll have another.
And raging red. Yes. Now we're lucky because we I saw you on Orville's story yesterday and I was like, this woman's in town. We're going to try to get her. And then I didn't know that this woman was going to be here. And I really didn't either. They kind of just picked me up off the corner. I didn't even see them pick her up. I just looked over and she was next to me in the car.
I thought she was a bag and somebody please get their things. Oh, talk in your time. Well, we were recapping a season like Season 12 to do a little like like cramming before you got here. And I was like, oh, we should get Heidi Nexen. And somebody said, she lives here now. Yes, I moved a month ago and I'm living my best life over on the whole struggle. And welcome to Los Angeles, which is Los Angeles now, which is quite specific about this role behind the 24 hour gym.
That's one. Oh, the one in Santa Monica. Oh, that is so strong. Do you also want to tell them your full address, the last four of your social life? People won't be waiting outside the gym looking like she's going to come past that. Some people have a right to know. That is the whole gym. And I've heard I went to twenty four hour fitness for three and a half years and my friend told me that people are jerking off in there all the time.
I went there for four years and never saw no one naked except those extremely old people whose skin looked like tortilla. It's right there, you know. Yeah. Oh I'm right here. But I never see anything sexy. But I got for Taco Tuesday only day photograph. I never see any naked shit at the gym. Do you like I do stuff. Yeah. Me and Kourtney went. This is before the quarantine. Me and Kourtney worked out at Crunch Fitness and we looked over in.
This man was looking at both of us and he had a huge dog. He had, he had and he took down his shorts and it unfurled what. And we both looked at it and then up at him and then each other. Not that it was Gray said, yeah, wait, there's more. Yes. Oh, my gosh. Huge. I'm like, OK, you see this microphone right here? Yes. It was like that thought was it was enormous.
And he was probably five, six. Anything happen? Nothing happened, thank goodness. Because whatever you just throw at my cousin. I took the money spot. Yes, I got to tell you, picked the right time to visit Los Angeles because this is kind of the best time to live here. Well, I don't smoke. I mean, the smoking air, I think Ariel currently unlivable, which means she just started smoking with the windows open.
You now she's driving with a cigarette, slug it out the window. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Now, you guys you guys obviously do know each other before season 12. Hell, no, no, no. You don't claim each other not. Absolutely not. About the very sorry to this man. May the back and down the street. Yes. Well, this woman, me and this prostitute woman have known each other an extremely long time.
Oh, my God. I'm sorry. I told you it literally just in the car when we were driving around, I was like, I remember when she crashed. Yeah. She was so proud when she got that little car. Yes. I crashed a smart car delivery driving sub sandwich as it happened to an old man with a fake like ran a red light and hit me head on. It was fucked up. And luckily, three cars stopped.
And we're like we've been following him for like a half mile. He's been swerving. We'll vouch for you. So I totally got my car victim. And if you ever purchased a car, I got the type of insurance where if it's totaled, you get all your money back. So I walked away with no carpeting. Only thing which, thank God, can I ask was the sand, which is OK, the sand, which was fine. But I was a delivery driver and I was so shocked.
I remember calling the person being like, I'm not family. Oh, no. I'm covered in blood, but sand, which is still the way it was interpreted, Gerber's on north and far well in Milwaukee and I called my my store manager and was like, I didn't a delivery. I got the crash. And he was like, did you get did you get the delivery? Are you not are you OK? But did the delivery. Yes.
They were like will make a new sandwich and run it to where it's got a service. Yeah. Yeah. I turn to you must be a little older than me because I turned twenty one on my birthday, which most people get older on their birthday. I went to see you at Mikage and I was there to see the harmony on my birthday. I ask that day when I had that little tiny chot wig with that pink and it was Nicki Minaj like Pink Friday.
It was even pre Pink Friday. It was. It was probably because it was with the Bob. Oh, Jada was doing Nicki Minaj. And you're I mean, you're skinny now. Your waist and your abs. You just were more. You said that as if she was fat before your waist with your right in the gym and much more with skinnier and she wore huge pads. Yeah. Oh well, no, it wasn't even pads, you know, but it was remember, that was back in the days when I would like get the stock and then fill them up and stuff and would like pillow filler your can get loose.
I just got a little girl girl with the best shape in the universe. It was it was almost never even heard of a Hollyfield pillow stuffing. And you just every day you'd even know you just stuff it. Never in my life. I've never even heard of it. Never seen it. It's all right. It's right. It's like the smoothest lines around. Yeah, but what is wrong if you so close? What if you kind of like, lean on something?
Does it shift? Well, this is a big that's what liberals are doing now anyway. Fly back out of midair. Like if you if you, some of the girls would pull it up and stuff it and then they would just pull it down and the next time you pull it back up. But it didn't get like bungee and it was like not oh no, not the moisture. Make it Kinsela hard. Never know. OK, no. You at the end of the night when it was heated up, it will kind of come out in one loaf loaf.
Just come together. Yeah. And until you really figure out pads and unless you have some really broken in couch cushion, that those are hard because when I first started I'd be buying the green stuff from Mychal's and it's so stiff. Absolutely not if you have the green foam. But then it turned out that was for stuffing flowers in. Oh no. Tie up front. You know, I was going all the way wrong, and I know your mom was on drugs currency.
Yeah, I wore a green foam on my green ass on drag race. You have? I had a green ass. Yeah, I did. And when you know. Yeah. When you have the green asked, do you have to wear so many hats off. Yeah. Because even if you get it smooth still. Yeah. Yeah. I got a green card that I but you have to like layer like the stocking. Yes. Very that like you have to color.
Correct. How many stockings you wear. Now let me see my mind. I wear one zero maybe like you know we're like five but and I wear like the transition type so I like reverse it, wear less. The toes are out in the front but then if you wear too many then it's like cutting under your elbow tells you that the tostada crunch. Yeah. Oh tell how many times do you wear. I probably wear too tight and like three pantyhose just because we see men sitting in two pairs of tights and then three panty hose hose of panty hose just below the panties.
I'm like things like that, they're very thin. You're ultra sheer, ultra sheer panty line. So they don't have that ugly control top. Yeah, yeah. I mean Canada's drag race, a low weight. And remember when we when we were doing drag, we would always go to Wal-Mart and get those fucking tights where you could see, like the last I can tell you a little bit later. And it was like a line here, like a Wal-Mart could drag.
You could get the tights, the control top legs, tights, fingernails, the fingernails, the kiss, the express now still get them. And then remember and then people will tell people like she's just doing mall dress like we did Wal Mart. We're going to the mall. Dot, dot, dot, dot. In the wake of those with 12 weeks to get all my jury get the hoochie mama outfit from the big bang. Oh, do you guys?
Thirty five dollars. I have three scraggly people here, a straight back. And then I remember the lady who worked at the hair store on North Avenue talking about Victoria. Yes, of course. Yes. Because I'm real proud of you and Trixie. You know what she said to me once when I came in? I was in drag. I was dancing. I was there in drag as she goes. Was it? I was in she goes, you know what you look like?
You like that, Paul? Ruth. Yes. She said it looked like the Paul Paul, Paul Booth flip out over state girl. And that store was looked up. And you remember I used to it was very frugal. You get the wigs, the double stacked wigs, and then you get that shitty black lace catsuit with the open God. My God, like I Jerry the last the Lord. Right, like avenue like and Blakeway spell three belts three if you need it for angle.
Yeah. Well you remember this bad. Absolutely. The I do kind of want everything back that you never gave me back. Was it gold. Yeah. Here we go with it. Big. Yeah. The confrontation. I do remember they surround that ring. It was we did that the college show. Where was I. Do you remember that ring that you're not getting it. I said I'm on television now. I will not be buying my own jewelry.
Have a great day. Pick an episode of Jaclyn Serengeti's. Yeah, I know that drag queen Serengeti's there. We have to ask Jay to swallow too. Oh my God. I was in my life. It is it is crazy because we were being really young and being like me and Jada would be like, you should be on drag race. No, you should God. And then we both and we. But then we auditioned. I can't I can't even remember.
Now, this is a whole other part. I mean, yes, I way where circle. And you know what, we love James Mansfield, but she is the other third queen from Milwaukee. So imagine a one of the first out. James called me after days and I got to go and she goes, remind me again, which cut is the deepest. And then of all the songs to go home on, she went home with singing a Love Shack, which plays in every store all day, every day and time.
Yeah. So did you buy a new sweater when you're selling sweaters right now? Beautiful sweaters, argyle sweaters, gorgeous. And we even have some made from Ginuwine yak hair. If you're interested in that jacket, you need to be on the intercom of every department store chiming in. Every once in a while the woman and the woman deliver things in lingerie. It's me. Yes. Covered in blood. Have a lovely day. I will say this as ever.
Can I ask, did you guys ever steal from the beauty stores? Because I never did. But when you're a drag queen, they watch you here. I never did. But they watch you like you still watch it. Well, I'm used to that woman of color being a beautiful woman of color shopping shop. I was say shoplifting. There you go. That's a woman of color shoplifting in the store. They always seem to watch. So that's the problem.
You walk in and say, I'm here to shoplift and they think that I'm stealing. I'm going to start taking because I'm going to rob you. I wasn't going to take anything until you made me feel like I was going to take something. And I'm taking that down. All of it. Four of these dollar rings and stuffed them in my purse. Yes. I think drag queens do get watched at stores. And maybe it's because for good reason, you both give me a look.
When I said, have you ever stolen. Well, I ran the store and robbed it. That's why I ran a costume store and stuff. But I had I had a very fierce policy when it came to shoplifting. I will only steal from places I work at. But that was after being wrongly accused, which I really blame the system because I was wrongly accused and terminated and said, I'm going to get back. I didn't get the job.
When she comes over here, I make her use a clear bag like Macy's. I'm awake, you know, like I get the full patdown, which I love. You guys are that. Yeah. Do you ever work anywhere? We had a clear bag. It's very dehumanizing. J.C. Penney didn't get the job. I mean, I get why they do it so that they don't have to accuse you of stealing because they can see in your bag.
But it is a little light. It's like privacy. Please, Mary, I don't care to steal. I've never worked anywhere that was nice enough to do that kind of policy. I think to steal the best I ever had was janitor at a hospital. Oh, my God. At a hospital, get at it, you will not. There were people I did steal some stuff, you bag the blood, I did fill gloves. I thought she stormed the stall.
The warm thought that they keep in the little drawer the hospital staff because they were walking home. If I call you freak, like you can't wash your own socks. Absolutely not. You're still a bedpan. No, but I should have to a kid. See, I don't want to go here on this stupid was clear about. I went to reach the maximum used to come sometimes. Yeah. Trixie's the only person. Well now somebody else did my make up, but she was literally the only person who ever did my makeup ever in my life.
But it was as a boy as she came in as a boy to get to I think I remember a studio finished concealer. That's how much I remember it. And your skin looked the same today as it did. That was across the room in the dark with her eyes closed. I got to ask, it's like I'm sure you guys get sick of hearing about it. But we were recapping 12:00 today and we were like, they really did that while nobody could go anywhere in the world.
Yeah. I mean, I can't imagine walking gag. Yeah, I imagine you guys. I think you know what I it like the craziest thing I think is like one it was it was good because, you know, you could be out on the road and then you have a bad day and you're like, OK, all these people are here and they can be like, what the fuck? This bitch is a mess. And I mean by that, we didn't have to deal with that.
But then also a lot of us, you know, like traveling on the road is the way that people can get to know you outside of what they see on the competition and you miss all of that. So I don't know where it was just I mean, can I ask I don't want to ask financials, but like, I'm assuming most of your gigs came digitally or like, yeah, I've done a lot of online gigs, some college gigs from private gigs, just all kinds of gigs online.
And I've never been like a technologically fowling either. We had her on the pitstop, but she had just moved here furniture. I was sitting on the ground, I was on the ground. My hard drive shifted in my laptop for but all she was sitting on her not like this exercise ball enough. I was running my laptop. All my fault. All my fault. Shut you were. That's why I look like that explained it. It was a little kid you say.
Thank you T-Mobile. Thank you. Thank you T-Mobile for that excellent serve. It does well because I ran a laptop, I ran my PlayStation. The gasoline with other people on my heart watched candidates drag race into it and stick to work life. But that was the nice thing about Pitstop, is you don't have to worry about where to find it because they just put it in front of you. So if when you don't have cable, it's kind of hard to find drivers and let's just buy it on iTunes.
But even then, you're watching it the day after. Absolutely, yeah. You can buy it on YouTube. I do. Just it just got turned on because I paid the bill. I have cable, but I never, ever watch it. Like I still like I always buy streaming. I watch not being in the mood for TV, I think because we've been in the house and we had no choice but to watch TV. So no, I don't give a fuck about it.
It's like I want to watch like in some of the shows, it's like you realize how repetitive some stuff on TV is when you have no choice but to watch it all day. Yeah, we, I don't watch a lot of TV and we only see things for like the Netflix show. Yeah. If that shouldn't exist I wouldn't see any of them. Yeah. No absolutely. Yeah. We don't watch, I watch a lot of TV. Oh no.
Why pay for cable. Because when I do watch TV it's streaming services like Hulu or Netflix. Yeah. Every fucking cable outlet has an only fans now it's like people like HBO Math and a digital and then you realize it's like, wait a minute, you said only almost had a heart attack. I don't see where do you have you described only fans know. Oh, I'm too poor. I can't afford. You should start your own anyway. I'll pay for it if you are so busted open gorod.
Oh well so what else do they want on their latest fashion video. I suppose what I do personality whistle. Just whistle topless. Well then how are you going to make something thing work. Be right.
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And so I have to I have to give a shout out to one of the best entrances in drag race history is just insane, you know, and I don't even remember doing it that long. It was so long. And I, I mean, I was like, OK, this could either be like real time or editing or whatever. I don't care. I think it was real time, though. It was so fantastic. It was it just went on to ever.
Yeah. It was so funny. Crazy funny that the entrance matters, you know, I just I just sit at home doing nothing and just make as weird fucked up noises as I can think of doing just that. No, I can do it. It's like it's called let alone I live alone when I start living alone I'm never here silent. Oh, like I'm talking, I'm doing voices. I'm doing it. Sound as if I hear something, if I hear something.
I paired it to myself for days. I don't. It's a story. It's a journey. And it's been for nowhere here. Yeah. For no one. Yeah. You don't live alone. I don't live alone. Oh you don't. I allow you to because you live with you. I have no public about. Yeah. Oh you guys been together now. It's been thirteen years and we wouldn't know. Yeah. Her boyfriend. Thirteen years.
How's it feel to have had a relationship of old as I am interesting. How are you. Your son, your man. Your daughter. Yeah. The only plot to is now without my daughter. That didn't last long and beautiful. Do you find your family secrets. Yeah. Maury Povich. We watch out for a really long time and it's like it's good because, you know, like that weird thing when it's like hard for drag queens to find love.
We're just like I literally did not do drag until I met him. And he was like, this will be good for you. And I was like, I don't know. That's not something I want to do. He was right. Well, look at him now. Look for once in his fucking life when I do something right. Wow. Well, not to mention he's sort of a he's more than a boyfriend. He's sort of your assistant, like his hair partner.
Fantastic. Even like, you know, Predrag race, he would be backstage at the gigs helping all the girls, not just her Morgus of hell. He's he's a he's a hopeful piece. It's like that can help help. And which finally we're making it sound like Jada couldn't do a thing without him, like they got you there to put you on. There was a rumor that people were like, she never comes, she never does her makeup at the shows because she doesn't know how to do makeup at her boyfriend's doing her makeup.
Well, you to prove them all wrong. I wish the gag is what they are doing it like I please, I need a 10 one, please, please, please, please, please the bathroom with the impression on that. I am actually paying lip service to come back in ten minutes. I have to say it really fast. I'll be right back. I'm just taking my makeup with you as much as I can while I'm in there like I'm a girl on seven.
Who was it was maybe her first time getting in drag by herself. I'm right here on MySpace. It was probably her first time doing her own course. Yeah, yeah. Yeah. That was yeah. It was getting all the things that I remember on All Stars with Alyssa. It was like when we had been working what she had been used to having an assistant. And then you go back on drag race. I know that. And it's like somebody get this, you know.
No, nobody can actually know. We can get yourself. Yeah, yeah, yeah. But it's, you know, because I was never that helpful, period. People be like, can you just come help me with this machine? Yeah. So you take you build a time machine. Yes. You go back in time, you take some sewing classes and you wouldn't be in this position. You walk away and I walk away. Just I try to help.
This one time I tried to help Shangela and she tried to make a tube dress and she didn't know. Do you stretch fabric? Oh, me. Show her to sew a straight line. And then at the end she was like, it doesn't fit. I'm like, that was a dress you were making. Oh, it was like a sequined fabric. No strap, no matter how much you were making, like a trapper keeper. Yeah. Oh my God.
Rapert. Yes. That was a tiny dress. Yes. She's so thin if she can't fit. And I was like it's not happening girl. Yeah. It's just not it damn it's not, it's not your seamstress because you when you got your board thing was fantastic. Oh my God I well I got so like well everything that I want to show besides like the yellow look and the black ball, I mean the black wedding dress. I made everything you made everything.
Everything you used to me to drag race. I said I'm a really poor bitch and I want to look OK. Yeah. And nobody can do things for me. I have no money so I'm gonna have to figure it out well locally, like doing drag in our town. Mochis, I think the sixteenth biggest city in the U.S. It's not huge. Yeah. You want nice drag. Do you have to make nice because we don't have wigs like we were ever paid enough to judge it to be like, oh, and a drag.
And it was like literally you would do drag and you would get done and you were like, let's go to Taco Bell, God, we need to do another show tomorrow because I have no money now. And if you could stack a hamburger Mary's gig with an appearance at a club. You were rich. Yeah. Oh my God. And then only if the club would be like, you're not doing another gig somewhere else. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
No exclusive gig for forty dollars. Right. I don't know why they want exclusivity and loyalty and then for nothing more and no costumes. That's possible. I think you just did that. No. Well yeah. I made four dollars just doing it again. I'm doing some of that. I hope you like it. Yeah. I learn the words tomorrow. You know, maybe you don't know how to do it. I went into drag race. Poor postpunk in debt.
Yeah, well you you mean a lot of your stuff. I made a lot of my stuff. Yeah. Because I didn't I get no money. Did you make your size hard on me. Am I too. Dragsters made most of my stuff. It was very stressful because actually I was supposed to go to Nationals for pageants the same week that we left for race. Miss. No way miss. What entertainer ran a race over a pageant entertainer of the year that's coming for Jada and I got approved for the show like the week after I spent all my money for National.
So then I was poor. When they gave me the call, I'm like, oh no, to scrounge up what I can so I can go do the thing that most people are making their drug like. I mean, not to call her out. Thank God. The theme for the pageant was dress for a gown. She was wearing a black wedding gown. Actually, it was it was good. It was like the sparkle was going to be, my God, I'm like, oh, I was not aware.
The Robin wig. I was not going to wear the a little I say choices are being made. Coronation are being made except for nature, no less coronation that greenware wear. Yeah. Microbeads, the green microarrays popcorn cabinet. That was cute. I think it's the tax really the full coronation moon bestows peace and blessings.
So I think most people I mean, on season seven, I had never even seen drag like MySpace. No, absolutely not. All designer. I still have wigs. Let's be honest at the time. As nice as repulse. Yeah. Inverted, hairless. Sometimes better than earlier lines. Yeah. Well I'd never seen like a custom here. I think they like changed drag race a lot because then it was like California. We hit just go in here with anything that we brought now.
Yeah, yeah, yeah. She was a turning point. It was because then after that you had Kim Naome, people just like. I was like, oh, this is right now looks look so fast. It's like it's like like something from Theel or crazy though now, because like all of those fucking like when you leave to do the show, like we are literally just regular as girls working regular gigs, like with your jobs go back to me to show up with a hundred thousand dollar wardrobe.
Yeah. For a competition. I don't think there should be a limit or something like this. Should be like a budget or like you can't. It's like you know you did the Yankees swap at Christmas. Yeah. Twenty dollar gift limit. Yeah. You can speculate there. Like is that Swiss. Get out of. Get out of it. Out. Get out of here. You know. Yeah. Oh my God. Get your body out of here.
Forcing you to leave or have half of the challenges be design design challenges. Yeah. You know, I think I would go home because I really would really like more like design challenges. I really do think that year was rare because we only had one design challenge. Just one, just one single one was the beginning of the season. We only had one design challenge. I think season was one of the only seasons I ever had. Just one girl seven had like twenty eight.
And they had no we only had like twenty three had three. So the Project Runway, I remember being rejected. That was the first time I applied for season three and I got a callback and I, and then I was like, I'm on it, I'm on it. You were in the casting special. I was like, I was like I'm on it. And I started to get it. Like I didn't tell anybody, but I was like and you started to feel this great feeling that the and I didn't receive a second call and that was kill myself.
And then but then I saw this season I was like, thank fucking God I would have jumped out the window. You know, who else thought she was on it? She thought she was on it. She was on the casting special, too. I realized she was like, I'm Andre. Yeah. And then never heard back. And she was like, oh, devastated. Well, when the casting it was like, oh, I guess I'm not on it.
Yeah, but I but I would, I would never mind one coming this summer. Rupal Stratigraphy three. Interesting. Yeah. Yeah I guess. Well let me just call that number back, just pay myself what's going on there. I just wish I tell my Uber driver to go get my driver's license in L.A.. I just really. Yeah. I'm just in drag walking. Would you, how would you have fared on season three. I think I would have been really good.
Like I, I feel like I'm a very good at making things when I'm like under pressure. That's what I think I usually will do the best. But this has to be like and I like to do stuff like really fast like. But it's 2011, Jado 2011. Jado was like, OK, this hooker was gorgeous. But I used to like go to the beauty supply store. Right. Buy a pair of leggings, buy another pair of leggings and make a hole in the crotch and pull them up in your arms through the layers.
You ever do that because they make it catsuit. Yeah. You saw the fuck in the waist together and you cut a hole in the crotch and it's a catsuit. Yeah, I need to see that to believe it. It can be worse than that. Busy. Oh yeah. Oh my God. We get all. But can we supply store and get all the crazy print leggings. That's what it's like. That literally was my Nicki Minaj that all of that were the way she was about, oh, cover up the seam or your corset over it.
Oh yeah. And then you poke that hole and then every time you put it on though, you have to crawl in through the head hole because there's no zipper. So we just said, okay, yeah. Right, yeah. It's a jurien. Yeah. Sometimes I would buy a third pair and then I would cut one of the legs off and attach it here like a hood. So then it can go over your face. Yeah. Like a freak.
Yeah. Oh. Oh you know this is Milwaukee Classic. Milwaukee Classic. Okay, if these are things that people in the world would know, if they would just cast it as a little bit sooner, yeah, we could change the world. But this year I lucked out. I think you would have done fine on early seasons, though. I don't know how you had your shit together brilliantly. Well, I think I think I think the main thing is like I was not really like comfortable like talking, you know, like I would talk to you, but I wouldn't like ever really like to have conversations with a lot of people.
Well, really comfortable around people like that. Well, we were a good ten years younger than any other work. Yeah. I quit in Milwaukee Zabari. And, you know, people me sometimes say like but some people were so nasty to Trixi and I thought it was just ridiculous. Like, well, like we literally we would be in the dressing room and like just talking like she looks really terrible right now. And my business is like a rut.
And we were like, she's just they look good. Like but also, you know, I thought this is about I love that. I love that you're like, that's awful. But did you were you episode one, Heidi and Clausewitz's and twelve that. Well, if you look at season seven, though, didn't you look at me like, who's this idiot? I was like, I thought, who is this fashion woman? Who is this runway model?
Well, I'm not going to lie to you. I didn't think I was a comedy person. I was like, I'm. Doing modeling, absolutely, because she's a professional model, so much modeling, but we know that she was literally like what kind of modeling and talking about original only fan stuff. Yeah. Oh, I wish I was this weird looking as I was now, but with none of the actual intent or knowledge that she would go bald.
And just like where it's like a little people are like, so you were like, yeah. So you want to fall that up too. Yeah. And I was like, I am the fashion queen. I was over at Katyal's like, no, no. I was like, I'm a makeup artist and I'm a fashion model. And we both look at them and we're looking. And she was she was going to Entertainer of the Year to when she was younger.
Yeah, it was crazy. But, you know. Thinking back, though, you know, when you're young in drag and everything's an insult. So, yeah, somebody would be like, if you're going to do your cheeks that dark, maybe do your forehead a little darker. And I would go home like she fucking kayfabe, like everything is a read. But people are just kind of hoping you might want to control your nose. What the fuck.
Yeah. Fuck are you. And then you go, oh oh it's older queens being like, have you tried wearing shoes and you're like you're coming out because you can't be told that my aunt Debbie. But no, I like to tell you, like literally Trixie was like I'm like wherever I remember when she was like, oh, like we both auditioned. That's when we did the fashion show, like at the Haunted Bestir. Yeah. Was like it's haunted as I always stay there because it's haunted.
But we did a fashion show there and they like that was like right when we're like I'm like my tape. I submitted it. She like I said, made it. Mine is like, yeah, you're going to get this like no trust me, you'll get on before me. I'm like, no, I'm like because the thing was like when we did drag, like what we would do in Milwaukee, more people would be like, we love Jada because we get it, because that's different than you were.
You were the perfect type of drag, though, because you are pageant. That's perfect. She's beautiful. God is not always blonde. Watch your drag was very like twenty one year olds loved it. And all the pageant girls who booked shows loved your dad normally hate the young girl because she was in gowns and she was like, well you get on the show because of that. And I was like that is so weird. I'm like I think you will get on the show because your drag is not gutbucket.
Like, I hope I'm going to get on the show. You will take off in the world. Will I be able to see you? And then it will be completely different because Milwaukee was like people had like such a defined idea of what drag was like. You had to like even for like Trixi or me, like you either you did Pageonce, even if you didn't like it, you had to or they would not give you booking places at home like.
Right. It's a lot of cultures when you do the you do the pageants to prove to sort of the bookers that you aren't Buerger, that is. And then you wait. They like and they still won the pageant. Yeah. I begrudgingly give you your forty dollars prelim fee and they when they throw in you, if you skip your thirty dollar booking girl they take your crown away if you don't come to your ten dollar. But the prize one twenty five, no entry fee, one hundred dollars which is hard to come up with is a thousand dollar package.
Yeah. Booking fee one twenty five for the crown. Why is that a problem. You didn't miss Wisconsin. Yeah. You won. No I remember, I remember the year. But you're right, I do that title horse. I think I should have won. So you're not a state titleholder, know. I mean. I know I am, but you were there that year, I was there and when we say goofed at the patch, she looks perfect.
And you did that song like Dumb Animals and did African dance with a big, huge hair with backup dancers. And it was flawless. And they didn't give you nothing. Yeah. Wow. I mean, you know what they gave me? They were locked. They played. You seem upset. Why are you packing your things? You just stay on the stage a little bit longer. Like, I stayed and took the photos you asked me for.
Now, can I just pack my things? But why? I was like, why are you trying to like, y'all already got me. Why are you all trying to make me feel so bad as a girl? Yeah, well, you know, you did pageants. You know what they say, like it's her year. Yeah. Yeah. Sometimes it's hard with pageants because you're competing. But when people say things like it's her year, it's like, wow, there is this.
Yeah. Yeah. And it's think we all know they're not going to top that this year. It's my year and then my first alternate. How is how political is the pageant system and are they different. Like is the continental system from the gay American system is I think the patterns are all different. But I like to believe in a trusting system like at least for like national pageants. I think I would never like even go to or support a pageant I didn't think was fair.
I mean. Right. But I think also like people give pageant like pageants like shit in pageants have like some of the most creative, like one hundred percent like I do wild ideas. Even when people see some stuff off drag racing, like, oh my God, am I. You do know that they stole that from a video of a pageant girl. One hundred percent. Yeah. Some of the runway looks that people gag for, like all that stuff that when I see a girl do a jump split in a wonder woman on drag race, I'm going to turn off the TV.
Oh, my. If she the rock from the rafters. From the rafters. Look up there. They're up there. We're going to take another break. Green Chef is a USDA certified organic company that makes eating, well, easy and affordable with plans to fit every kind of lifestyle, I am obsessed with cooking. And what I'm most obsessed with is cooking in any way that is convenient and easy. The fastest way to get me into the kitchen cooking for myself is to make it easy for me.
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Stop this madness now and we won't report you, right, Eliza? Yes, please. I just let them do this to you. Oh, my God. Stage is on fire. Oh, my God. Eliza, you have to tell me what's going on, please. I want to help you, but I need to know what we're dealing with here. She's not a well person. I can't do it anymore. I don't know how to get help.
Vivid hallucinations that demonic forces are imprisoning. Something happened last night at the party. How is this girl suddenly writing a hit single after hiding out for all these years? Journalist Sheena Sicko arrested for inciting a riot. You saw this was going to happen and you just stood there and let that girl fall to her death. The validate. What's the divinity, Eliza? I know it's dark in there, Eliza, but you must come to the light. But just like any good story, nothing is as it seems then once you know the truth.
The world is never the same. The Shadow Diaries from Studio 71 Ensnarled Entertainment, starring Keira Heyward and Madeleine Peche, coming soon on Apple podcast or wherever you listen to your favorite shows. Not if a. And we're back, that's how we come back. I been away from my face. Trixie's back to pageants, too. I always tell people like whether or not you like pageants, the pageant I to be outside my door. I told you not to have that milk.
The pageant is going to be the best strike show you'll see all year. Yeah. And also I feel like on drag race, people who are casual fans of drag or just drag race fans that that this pageant quote unquote pageant thing gets oversimplified into and drag race. Yeah, because the pageant world is enormously diverse and very complicated in different ways. Like and there's multiple systems, different systems with different roles. And also drag queens get pigeonholed before they even open their mouth and drag race.
So you're a pageant queen, but can you be funny? You know, and what does that come from? I don't get a yes or no girl. So I was like, oh, I probably have the most crown because were trying to figure out. But you say the most Crone's most probably the most. Crone's don't know. It happens a lot. I think like if you look at somebody like a Kennedy Davenport, you're like, how could you ever think that a pageant person can be hilarious?
Yeah, because that Kerwin's every comedy gentlemens is also a pageant. She got to let people do comedy pageants. Yeah. Oh, yeah. Yeah. Ginji, ever done a comedy pageant? No. I'll think before the show I'd never done anything comedy adjacent. Like I was young, like you were a model and a woman. I guess the only person I was the I was the queen that was doing I was like do all in the pageants, all the pageants.
But the girls knew which pageant I was going to do and they would not go do that. Think all two of them and stand to lose in this episode is brought to you by delusion. Delusion out of your fucking mind. Yeah. She was the only one in Rameswaram, North Carolina, only Rameswaram. Then she said, when I went to the pageant, the other three and a half girls not to go because I know this mother told this girl that comes out of Pedders, she always wins because no one shows up.
And then I never get that lucky. I always show up. And that's when eight of the bitches want to be at the pageant, too. Why can I never just have a walk in the park happen, especially in the club system, if you just might be the only competitor. And just when it happens, they do the pageant anyway, though I don't know what the category is. The girls who get like a really big head when they like.
I'm going to miss Wisconsin, I'm going to do the pageant and I'm like, OK. And like, you won a prelim with nobody there. But you get you get to do the full thing. Oh, you win. If you still lose, you have to grow up, be like you, some of you some systems have where you have to score a certain amount of points or you still lose because you and I could imagine I pride myself to sleep that night and wake up and keep right what happened to me, because it's like, here's a box of shit.
You still don't know what else to do with you. The entry fee, the strambi. My trophies are ridiculous. Yeah, they are. They are very high. I mean, they are just as much as you would win if you win. Yeah. Imagine systems are a business. Yeah. So when the commitments are huge you basically have to do whatever those promoters ask you for. Next year you're going to cut those ribbons at the supermarket. You do get a kiss, those babies.
But you know, like if it's if it's 2011 and you're worse and miss Entertainer of the Year. I'm tough. Yes. And you're touring the country and the booking fee is, hey, me a couple hundred. Each is better than forty dollars at the hometown. I also have to go travel, travel and then people who love pageants. I mean I feel like pageants and like drag race have a lot in common, especially like the way that the fan base would be, because people you go to a pageant and you make so much money in tips that it's ridiculous, ridiculous, ridiculous.
That's true. Before the show, pageants are where I got the most of my money. Yeah. Yeah. But this was dating. You were just taking me. I was like a sold out in the crowd. She was actually out in the crowd with a bucket saying this is for the girl, this is for her children to not be pimps during the pageant. So put it in my sock. I will never sell robbing entertainers doing Koronis. You can't touch the entertainer you got have the money in your bucket and you out the back door.
She's operating. She's operating digital drag shows that everyone's Venmo is hiding in closets. I'm going to split it. It's less complicated. It's way. And I'll give you your tips. It's like three dollars. Like what the fuck is that? I'm splitting it even. I swear. Yeah. This is all we made. Have you guys done some of the digital. Yeah, I've done a couple. Can I just ask you to ask how hard it was weird to win drag race period.
Was it weird being. Drag race in your living room? Yes, I was in your computer and laying down a bit so weird, you know. Today. You lost your fucking mind? No, not running a two for three sale on delusion. I wore a galaxy down to the public eye. No. Oh, it was so flawless. I actually had to wait. Yeah, it was amazing. What I remember was that the mast. Just the mask.
Right. Oh, ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba. The mass people in the massaro. Yeah. What you know, I mean, I don't think anybody knows. I don't know. It's like, you know, when Netflix releases the next few episodes of Unsolved Mysteries, we will find something like that. But as of right now, there's no way of telling jury like you. I was surprised by it when I watched.
I was like, oh, that's right. I'm just assuming she may be I mean, I'm just speculating. She likes to look her best and maybe she had a skin. I don't know. I think I think, like, the crazy thing is probably like no makeup. And she probably wanted to be like in drag and then have that done. Like, if I get that with quarantine, you just like you can't know. But clothing is so fabulous.
Any of those suits, I mean. Yeah. So I left I clean up scene in park. Exactly. Oh. Are you trying to get an endorsement as try. Oh I try. That's right. What was your favorite, what was your favorite from the season. Are you most proud of challenge wise. Runway wise. It would have been sending me home. Oh my God. What was the song are you triggered when you hear it? 1985.
I mean, to this day I you know, you're lucky because twist of fate doesn't come up. Never, never, never hear it in my life everywhere. Like go to the bar, it's play. I go to the store. It's like I go to the gas station. It's like I'm playlist is playing. Yeah. Yeah. Like I think like I was like that that day. I was like oh my God, I know I'm going.
And also I had to pee so bad, so bad and they would not let me pee. And it was the worst part was that I was going out to do a horrible skit about really peeing on myself at a pageant. I would have pissed on myself in the audience waiting to go on stage to tell a story about peeing on myself. Yeah, well, how ironic. That's a little too on the way to Drew's bathroom, like the one that like all the judges about downtown, you had like potpourri.
And they told me you walked in and she was in their partner. Who knows what the fuck out of here. Get the fuck out of here. Are you going to lose anyway? Now, she had no idea. Had she flushed. Yeah, I don't blame where she letting it mellow. It was flushed, but the water was like a like a shearer's switch between the. I was you know what, I was paranoid. Could you imagine back after you flash you fill it with this water bottle.
You, you do hold your piece so long on drag race. Sometimes you're like when I get to that bathroom, I know it's blood coming out. Yeah. I just feel like your guts will explode and you will die the same. I remember like I couldn't get my nails off quick enough to like you're going to be your pants. Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's going to happen because the closer you get to the toilet, your body or your body on there, I don't have to help me with the type.
I'm like, look, don't look, just just start pulling down. Let's take the right guy, pull it a little bit and I could go, but I never I couldn't put it back on, like, if I took it, like, but that's all I did. I cover my client to kind of like the one in your damn living room. I mean, I like we want in the living room and I like it when you watch, like the reaction video with like we actually watched it like separately and they told my boyfriend, like, he can't be in there watching it on his phone or something because, you know, because I'm like, I don't want to know, like in case like if the phone would go faster and they announced that on the phone faster than what we watched on the the show when we watched all together, he would have been like, oh, my God, you won.
Or I got excited and I knew. Right. But then I knew before I him. So we were completely prepared that he would know before me. And I was like, like scream. And he came out like, you know, like, did you guys feel weird, too? I saw like because, you know, we've done a lot of stuff remotely and it's just drag remotely is not magical. Why it's so hard to feel it. You're just like my high energy from the audience is not there.
Like I feed off of that. The fact that you're not uncomfortable shoes on your feet. Yeah, I feel like I deserve some energy from the crowd. Yeah you do. I think you do. Too high. I crave it. I you're not you not you pull this like it's a necklace that he is. You sure. And she's painting it close. Look at what I do. I got her ankles cross the devil. And the point is that it's ok.
She is Perjeta. And buried last not just all parts, like a woman's toe schnell, schnell for the southern woman, she went to deliver a deep thought to Christopher Banks piggy banks. Oh, what do you guys want to do when I mean, you know, we're tired old Schoenberg's, but young young new celebrities like you guys, what do you want to do when the world opens up? We overrate you toward a little. Did you do work?
No, I did like the drive and drag show, which was like different than the work the world bit. What do you see this video? He said, no, I did not to do so. But I do think that's what anybody brings up, A.J. and the Queen. And I'm like, oh, the show everyone was in that it even though I was on tour and couldn't do it, I'm like, I was not there. The thing is, is I would have been there had I been asked if you look at my schedule and assume that I can't be somewhere I don't want to part of it.
Yeah, I don't want a part of it. Yeah, well, there was like that book, that fucking book was I don't know if it was bagginess or there was a drag book that literally had every fuckin drag queen in the goddamn world except me damn well. And that's not enough. I in it. Yes, you're right. You're going to go on the cover. Congratulations, everyone, on the cover of I think I am in that book and I hear that picture from the author.
You look great at the back of the line. And then I also on the audiotape about the author of the book Dead as it's like a woman from Milwaukee, Wisconsin, with a mission. She knew that one day she'd be successful. A great writer, philanthropist and artist, she celebrates life every single day by being exactly who he is. Once again, delusion. She drives a black Mercedes Benz girl. You don't drive like, damn. Do you not have your license?
No. And her driver is a black guy named Mercedes. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Mean. Yeah, like literally like I always like the first time that I tried to like I was learning to drive and I was on fucking bolita not believe Bilour Avenue and I got pulled over by the police and it was like four cars and then I got like a ticket ticket. Driving while black is a thing. The price, it's the thing to remember if you're burning remember to be it.
Yeah. I would never burn out live together. I only get pulled over when he was in the car with me. Always. Always. Yeah. My roommate was black and we would only get pulled over together and I'll be like well I'm so I mean why they get pulled over. He's like, you know why. Because I'm in the front seat with him so soon as you like. Sometimes. Well, most times as soon as you cross over into Wisconsin, it was like we were like nobody anywhere else is like on the streets patrolling.
These are, you know, the most segregated city. And so it's in a few blocks. It goes from white kids, white families to like the black neighborhood. And I mean, it's the Hispanic neighborhood. It's like in Milwaukee, like when you crossed the bridge, the twenty seven and thirty Fifth Street bridges. And then it was like a whole new world. It's very slow. You get pulled over here, but not here. Yeah. It was like real crazy.
But anyway. Yeah but you Heidi, the way you drive you be pulled over every every neighborhood I was I like driving. Drive through that. Let the woman drive. Who is to blame then myself would never be lifted. I'm walking by my over my shopping. She's going to get groceries and a shopping cart which is something we should be tying up her helis. Yeah. People don't leave. I do need to know. I just got somebody on Amazon.
They make them up to as many as 15 when they were 40 bucks. They're very worth it. Oh, no, I'm a sixteen. Oh, no, we're trying to find them. You know what they say about a being with big feet big for you like that good idea has been over there. It literally hurts like, you know, you. Do you want a tip? I know I am a physical person. Yes. You like.
My God, I'm forty to look at what I'm doing and what I'm saying. I'm buddy. You're just looking at your favorite part of the podcast. I'm funnier to the page here because I'm here and you get to see the visuals. We didn't mention she's in drag, Your Majesty, open, patriotic, but also her followers are going down, just as you mentioned. Yes. Only fans quit. Yeah, the. Because they heard you become, you know, giggling because you have fans, have you gotten sick of any, like people trying to ask you to whistle or anything like that?
Is it has it been, you know, long enough or. No? You know, what we get from the show, you know, people see what they really enjoy about you, and they they want that from you and or they don't. Jada. Well, I have come to terms that for the rest of my career, I'm going to cry and lotion bottle, OK, whistle and then cry back my loss in coming out girl. That's a topical ointment.
That's that's. I see what you did there. It was funny, though, so it's an amazing job on drugs. Yeah. I mean, come on about we always talk. I mean, that idea almost went home. Second, I went home for seven. Yeah. The girl I mean winning's fabulous but like. Yeah, yeah. People love you guys. Now with National coming out day coming out and your name being Heidi and Closet, do you want to issue an apology on this podcast?
Because the way that you're westernising those words. Yeah. You're rhetoric weaponize and I'm trying to claim back the word closet because you're trying to go back and start work a lot. Look, look, it worked for you back in your day yesterday. The people are still young. I would say they would make it a negative thing. Clauses are for fashion, not men. OK, so this is the story. This is what I'm going for. We are taking back the word clause back or clause that depending on how you're feeling or close closest clause clauses or clause that clause that is my which is Heidi and close it, you know, may be closer and closer than Heidi and closer.
You get to do that either or. Oh, either that or OK, I only have the ones from last time. It's OK. Do you know I want to be hassled Heidi instead of house calls it just Heidi. Something like Heidi and Cupboard Heidi and cabinet. How do you and cast get Heidi and Kiki. I don't think for either. We're ok, we're ready. OK, ok. This is called this is gone long everything. Right.
But I did take a little short video of my closet so that people can see the true video. Audio. Yes. With the biggest thing that they have back where she came from. I doubt she has a rash on and off and. Well, I think she put a stone on it. She has a latch on the horn. If you have a bump, you better draw an eyeball on it, put on it and make it. Wait, wait, wait.
You don't know where everybody can find you on the Internet. Yeah, yes. They can find me on all the social media's hiding closet except for tick tock. OK, early hurry and closet cause someone stole and from me I was Trixie Mattel eight and I called Tick-Tock personally. I called her a liar and I got Trixie Mattel. So hell yeah. So the beauty that is the grace that was set them in Los Angeles and I'm white so I can just ask.
Tick tock. Tick tock. I'm really upset right now. My name only a white woman in trouble helping a white woman, but. Oh, my God. I must say that with the help button, working people find jobs, you can find me everywhere I'm right now I'm in my mind, I'm in your mind. The back alley of me. You're looking at me now. You can find me on social media everywhere. Jada IHA, that's Trada Iyall and Jerry Hall Dotcom.
I sell some things on there. Yeah, the girls can support the best way to support this right now during these trying times. And I'm working really hard to get a Gucci duffle bag. And if you could just buy a couple of things from me, please, please support the essence of beauty. Yeah, I mean, when I'm in the airport, I want to floss a little bit. TI got savings, retirement, real estate. Not that.
Yeah. Forget that duffel bag. Clouds are not funny anymore. It's not sunny skies anymore. It's gloomy day because the reveals. Yeah well with Cozette there's no better time for travel equipment. I, I we're not going anywhere. I want it when I do and it's already over my luggage set and it's going to sit and collect dust in my home. You know what also I think that Jenda reveals have done a lot of damage during this time, and I think that this is a good time for us to reflect and think about the reveals that we are doing on drag race and that some people need to calm down a little bit.
We might be the next we might start a fire next. Oh, my God. You anyway. Yeah, well yeah. This is twenty twenty genera. Deals have been dangerous for so long. Yeah. Yeah. Did you see the post where they talked about the very first official gender reveal and it was really just this woman who's their child does not even really conform to a typical gender norms, which is the crazy. And then they like do you have any proof of it being the very first one is really just a vanilla cake with icing and pink icing in between the two layers.
And she really tried to say, I did that, I did this. I am an inventor. Yeah, trailblazer, a risk taker. I invented burning down the forest with wild displays and revealing ginger. I know it's sad. There's nothing funnier than what started a fire, a gender reveal, something that did kill it to happen. This wasn't someone camping and it wasn't a home. Electricity. No, during Camp Dimmick at that girl having a party, having a party.
Should you not be having parties during quarantine times? I'm doing not this closet. I thought I was a question. I know. Like I said, I thought it was like you speaking of we should get back to the 400 person, get together in the living room. Thank you.