The Super Bowl LVIII Props Mega-Special With Cousin Sal
The Bill Simmons Podcast- 849 views
- 5 Feb 2024
The Ringer's Bill Simmons is joined by Cousin Sal to discuss their Super Bowl bet win-loss record for the 21st century (2:53) before running through their favorite prop bets for Super Bowl LVIII (19:47). Finally, they find some values in NBA awards and conference winner odds (1:04:16) before closing the show with Parent Corner (1:16:47).
Host: Bill Simmons
Guest: Cousin Sal
Producer: Kyle Crichton
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Coming up, it's the very special Super bowl prop show with the coast next. We're also brought to you by the Ringer podcast network where we are covering football like crazy. All of our football shows, you know what they are. All of our gambling shows, you know what they are. Theringer.com. You know where to find it. I have a new rewatchables coming up on Monday. It is from the tour that we just did. We did a little mini, little cold weather tour. We're going to be running the fugitive. It was the first one we did in Chicago. It was me and Chris Ryan and Mallory. Ruben, Craig horrible joined us at the end and we had so much fun seeing everybody. We were in Chicago, we were in DC, we're in Philly, and we were in New York City. The people that came out were just awesome. It was really fun. We've had this podcast now since 2017 and it's fun to just the live show, different energy, maybe make some choices you would have made if we were just in a studio in a good way. But it was an absolute blast. We loved it.
I was worried I was going to get run out of energy by the end, but I think four and five was the right number. I don't know if I could have done five out of five, but it was fun bouncing around. It was fun. Each city kind of acted a little bit like the know, like Chicago, very midwestern, very polite, super enthusiastic. Washington, also enthusiastic, a little more thoughtful. And then when we get to Philly, people were engaging with us. It was were, you know, shouting out stuff for the categories. They were really like co hosting with us and New York was a little bit of the same, too, but we had an absolute blast. So thanks to everybody who came out. I promise we're going to keep doing more of these. I think we're looking at Boston definitely at some point this spring, and then I think we're going to pop into San Francisco because that's a nice, easy trip for us from LA. So I think those are going to be the next two. So stay tuned for those. And thanks so much to everyone from behind the scenes that helped us out with that, including our girl Elizabeth, who put the whole tour together and was lights out, and Craig, who was producing every pod.
David Lara was doing all the social. So thanks to everybody who helped us out with that. You can check out the fugitive on the rewatchables feed. Enough of my long preamble. The cause is coming up. Super bowl props is next. First, our friends from projip all right, it's time to Super bowl props. What Super bowl are we up to? I don't even know. We're in like the high 50s. What is this, though?
It's LCCQM, isn't it? No, it's 58. 58. Simple.
58. Who are the great. Fifty eight s in sports? I can't even think.
Jack Lambert, right?
Oh, Jack Lambert. That's a good one. No great ones in basketball, right? Yeah. 58. Great. So we've known each other since Super Bowl. Raiders. Raiders. Tampa. Yeah.
That was the first one.
We watched that one together in our producer Daniel Kellison's office. We made a bunch of bets and I feel like we won most of them. I was going to go through with you and you just tell me blind, I'm going to throw the Super bowl at you. 21st century Super Bowls. Did you win money or lose money? Just blind. Blink, test blind.
We could do this deaf, if you want. I could just say lost for all of them, but go ahead.
Yeah. All right, first one. 2000, St. Louis beats Tennessee. Win or lose. Push.
It was seven, right? I remember taking the spread there. Listen, I probably lost on a million props, but I pushed on the spread.
Yeah. I don't have fond memories of that one. Next one was Baltimore Giants. This is my greatest Super bowl I've ever had. I won every year.
I think I listened to you on that. And I won with this.
Yeah. The field. Touchdown. Brandon Stokely caught the first one. It's like one of the great gambling days of my life. Next one was Pats rams. Another one where I cleaned up because the pats were like, getting 14, that was not as good for you.
Lost by a mile. And even worse, I told Jimmy to pick the pats in an upset on Fox because it'll end up looking good. And when he was jumping for joy, we were in the stadium and he's like, why are you so upset? And I was like, I just lost.
He's like, why are you so upset? Could you loan me money right now? Tampa, Oakland, we watched together, we cleaned up New England, Carolina. I feel like I lost. The Pats won, but I think I lost money because they didn't cover. Right.
I think I lost, too. That was the John Casey bowl. And I feel like when I dressed as Casey for media day and I lost, so I feel like I got some karma thrown my way. Yeah.
So Sal goes to media day, pretends he's John Casey, and these dumbass media people are going up and doing interviews, and then John Casey gets mad and then they tie the game late and John Casey kicks the kickoff out of bounds. And everyone blamed you.
My fault. Yeah. Blame me or praised me. Yeah. Your patriots really owe me. I should get a ring actually for that one.
You know what? You're a hero to Patriots nation for that one. Thank you. The next one was New England, Philly, where New England wins and doesn't cover. Do we have a name for when a team wins but does not cover?
Yeah, I don't know. It never really happened that much right up until maybe it's happened in the last few years. I can't keep track.
But there was just happened with Niners. With the Niners Lions game. It's like, oh, I had that game, right. But it didn't cover and it's just like ambivalence. It's like the ambivalent. Yeah. What is it?
I haven't thought about it, but ambivalence, like giving up Lance, giving it up for bowl.
Yeah. I don't have fond memories of that one either. Pittsburgh, Seattle.
I won on, I think I had Seattle.
I think I got killed on that one.
That was a rough indie. Chicago.
We all won because all of us, it was our one chance to bid against Rex Grossman. That was great, right? Giant 17 Pat's 14 February 3, 2008 I lost in every aspect of gambling life. It was one of the worst sporting events of my life. I was there with my dad for 60th birthday. But did you bet on the Giants in that one?
I lost both those Patriots Giants games. I thought the Patriots were much better. Like, the Giants don't belong here. That year the Giants beat my Cowboys. That was a great Cowboys team, too. And yeah, that was despicable by your team. I also couldn't root for either of those teams. It was rough.
I think Giants moneyline with the under was at least like eleven to one or twelve to one. Like anybody who did that before, they had kind of figured out to maybe adjust the under with the team that was obviously if they won, it was going to go under. Pittsburgh, Arizona, we watched together. This is finally remembered by us as when you created the Gary Russell prop.
That's right. We'll get to that.
Pittsburgh won and I think we won money on this. I think we had the Steelers. I have fond memories of this one.
Yeah, you look back at that, it's a miracle that we won that. Even if we had Steelers money line, which I think we had.
Packers Steelers. Did you go to this with me? This was in Dallas and there was like a sleet storm and nobody showed up, and I was sitting 50 yard line. But Pittsburgh, I didn't go to Pittsburgh in that one.
I had Pittsburgh also.
Yeah. Giants beat the Pats. I lost. You lost Baltimore, San Francisco in New Orleans, the blackout bowl. I was at this game, and I think I had San Francisco, and they had first and goal in the four. You had to shoot a bit after. I think we lost on this one.
I left. I definitely lost on this one. But the bit was to console fans from the losing team immediately as they walked out of the stadium. So I walked out with producer Dave Jacoby is like, hey, we got to go. We can't watch the ending of this, otherwise you're not going to be there. I was like, shit, he's right. And then I honestly didn't know who won the game because it wasn't like we had phones with the capability of streaming or anything there at that point. So the first 50 fans that walked out, I had no idea who was happy and who wasn't. So, yeah, that was a weird one. I lost.
And then you found out you lost money and you consoled yourself.
Yeah, it's a big hug around my fat torso.
Seattle 43, Denver eight was a big one for me. Terrible Super bowl, but I enjoyed that one. Pat 28, Seattle. ₩24 money on that. Denver 24, Carolina ten. I feel like we had Denver in this because their defense.
We watched that together. Yeah, we did.
Okay.
Those were good years. Cornheiser watched that with us, right?
Yeah. Pat's Falcons 34 28. This was an absolute gold mine. Pats win everything over every Brady prop. It was just a wonderful everything. I watched that with nephew Kyle. I watched that with my son Ben, my wife, my daughter. We changed seats at halftime. We don't get credit for what happened.
But I was terrible. I'm sorry. Just 28 three. Obviously, I thought I was smart. I bought the Falcons to plus three and a half. So even with that comeback, I'm like, oh, my God, let the Patriots win by three in overtime. No, not a chance. Ran right.
I think we did a podcast that night, and you were, like, semi comatose. It was one of your sadder performances. Well, it came back and bit me. Next year with Philadelphia 41, New England 33. Pats beat the Rams 13 three. I won on this one. Fond memories. Kansas City 31, San Francisco 20. Lost. Jimmy Garoppolo sales lost that tooth. Tampa 31, Kansas City nine. I won on that one. How'd you do on that one?
I lost on that. I had my homes there. I was anti Brady for that one.
Rams 23, Cinci 20. I think I had Rams money line, but the big one was Cooper cup. All the props with him, but the one that was the murder was the Odell Beckham over, because remember he hurt his knee, right? That's right.
Yeah. I had moneyline, too. We were at that game that was obviously here, right? Yeah.
And then the last one, Kansas City, Philly, last year, I kind of got wiped in that one. So I'm going to say I feel like I'm slightly up for the century. So now that we just recap this, are you slightly up, medium or slightly down?
Is this the question we asked St. Peter when we get to the procates? Like, hey, am I up or down for the century?
It might be one of my first three questions. Hey, do you have a running tally up here?
You know, it's a weird thing, because I'm down. Because I'm down in the dumps. I'm always like, if you win, it's a double edged sword, because I can't be too excited because there's no football afterwards. So I feel like I'm down.
Well, we didn't have football this weekend. I know you bet on Pro bowl stuff. I know you did stupid bets. What did you do? Tell us.
Nothing. No, even worse, I did english premier games at six in the morning. I'm waking the family up screaming. So, no, I stayed away from the Pro bowl. I'm proud of myself in that regard.
Nothing. Like, literally, you didn't do, like, an over. Wow. I really didn't do.
It's a flag football game. It's not even a real thing. It's weird. It's like, the funny thing is you.
Don'T even, like, know.
I know. It doesn't matter.
You literally don't.
I'm paying for peacock. I'm watching it. Goddamn it.
Three kids. I don't think any of them played soccer for more than, like, a year. I got time.
They'll pick it up in their 30s.
Well, we've had a week to stare at this Super bowl with the Chiefs and the Niners. And when we did guess the lines last week, I think. I guess one and a half. It bounced around. It was one and a half, two. Now it's two and a half. As we tape this on a Sunday night, where does it go? Where does it land? Where does it end?
Well, you're going to give me the title because you changed your guess to Tic Tac. One and a half, and I had two, so now it's two and a think this, I don't think it'll go to three, but just from casual people you talk to, you've been on the road for a week now. Everyone's asking who you're picking and every bonehead is like, I don't know. I'm taking the Chiefs, right?
Yes.
And so is the money that sharp that it could turn to niners minus three? And is that even the right side? Anyway, I don't know.
And we even did this. I'm guilty of it. The podcast we did last Sunday night, never betting against Mahomes again, the more I thought about that game over the next two days as I'm flying around and walking around trying to get my steps in and just thinking about how did I go wrong? How did I get both games wrong? Because I really liked my picks. And I'm looking at it and I'm like, the Chiefs didn't score in the second half. They scored 17 points. Baltimore was the right pick. They fucking sucked. I swore on Fandel TV. Sorry, Fandol. You have to bleep me. They stunk. Even if you go the Zay flowers reach, reach over and the throw in a triple coverage, you just change the outcome of those two plays and maybe they know. I don't feel like the Ravens were the wrong pick, but what I will say what I have thought about over and over again, I'm not the first person to make this point. It does feel like Mahomes is at this level now where he psychs the other team out or he psychs the other QB out, or there's some sort of, especially when he gets a lead and the other team just completely panics and changes their identity.
The podcast we did a week ago, we were like, what happened to the Ravens? Why'd they panic? What happened to Lamar? Why didn't they run the ball? And it's like, there's something about him and Brady, I think, had this, too, where you're just like. And you get discombobulated and I'm sure they must be watching that tape now and they must be like punching themselves in the.
Yeah, yeah. I think there is an element of a grown up playing, you know, one on one basketball with his six year old son. Like, all right, I'll let you shoot on me and I'll let you score or whatever, but when push comes to shove, I'm going to hit Valdez scandaling on a play that's going to be everyone else's best play of the year. But it's just like Mahomes's 50th best. So I think we're probably waiting on giving our picks, right? We're going to give a whole bunch of props today, but one way I'm looking at it is which units surprised you the most from these two teams? I can't believe how good the Chiefs defense is. I think they've allowed three points in the fourth quarter for all three playoff games combined, and I can't believe how weak the Niners defense is. So those are my two surprises. That's kind of how I'm going to start to analyze it, I think, from there.
Yeah. Was Hofanga this good that their whole defense collapsed? I'm leaning toward the Chiefs and it might change by the time we get to Thursday, but I was looking at the San Francisco defensive stats just for Detroit, Green Bay and the Baltimore game near the end of the year. Detroit had 28 1st downs, 442 yards. They ran 29 for 182, and they blew a couple of fourth downs. They had a fumble in their own territory. They moved the ball the whole game. And that was one of the worst losses we've seen in a while where your coach screwed stuff up. Your players made bad plays at the dumbest times. You lost an interception that hit somebody in the helmet, bounced in the air for a 50 yarder. Green Bay the week before, 330 21st downs, they ran for 28 for 136. And then Baltimore. That near the end of the season, 343 23 1st downs, they ran 26 for 102. And the Chiefs feel like they're in the proximity of those offenses. Maybe they're not as explosive as Detroit, but they're not going to be like worse than those offenses. Right.
And what they're not going to do is they're not going to abandon what's working. Right. So you said Aaron Jones is running all over, right? 49 ers as was the Montgomery Gibbs combo was giving them a fit. They looked faster than the Niners defense, I think Andy Reid and plus the whole thing, when he has two weeks to prepare all that stuff, throw that aside. But yeah, I don't think they're going to screw that part of it up.
Joe House, I don't know. Do you know him? He does millionaire stuff. Yeah.
Good eater in his, he, he put.
His foot in the sand of San Francisco would not be the fourth best team in the AFC.
Wow.
Was one of his takes on east coast bias on, you know, San Francisco is pretty explosive. At least you got to give it to their offense. But I keep playing this game out of my head. You saw what Kansas City did last week. Where that first hour, we talked about it last week on the pod. They just threw the kitchen sink at San Francisco and Pacheco had 14 carries. Kelsey had nine catches, Rice had six catches. They ran all their best plays for like an hour and ten minutes and then they kind of held on. On the flip side, Purdy really takes a while to get going. I was looking at some of his splits and stuff and you can see it like if it goes first quarter, second quarter, third quarter, fourth quarter, he gets better as the game goes along. By the fourth quarter he's 12.2 yards per pass. The first quarter he's like eight and it takes him a while. And one of the things I was thinking about was the Super bowl, which we always talk about how disjointed it is and the pregame is forever and it's hard to get it on the field.
You're on the field and everything feels so long. Then you have the first half and then you have this 40 minutes halftime and then you go again. I think it's a real disadvantage for a first time quarterback. So the combo of Casey starting fast and then Purdy starting slow, I keep thinking about that in my head, right?
Yeah, it's not even starting. I mean, definitely starting slow, but he plays a different game, doesn't he? Like in the first half or first quarter and a half, he will let the pocket crumble around him. He doesn't take off. He had like 315 yard plus runs. They were all in the second half. What are you doing? Why are you letting this? Why aren't you stepping up in the pocket? He did that against Green Bay. He did that against Detroit. It's going to be tough if he does that against Kansas City. I feel like he'll go down a lot and combined with the butterflies and everything else for a first time quarterback.
We'Re going to take a break and then we're going to talk about narratives and we're going to do some props. Happy Super bowl to all who celebrate from Fanduel, America's number one sportsbook. If you're like me, Super Bowl Sunday is all about scoring the best seat on the couch, grabbing your favorite football snacks and placing some super bets. If you're listening to this, you know that Sal and I are banging out props as we speak, including we're going to do MVP and a whole bunch of other stuff. So keep listening. Fando has so many ways for you to end this season with a w or two or three. Not only can you bet on who wins Super Bowl 58. But FanDuel also has bets for which player will score a touchdown. Who's going to score the first one? How many points are scored? All the props that we're doing right now. And if you're new to Fanduel, join today. You'll get $200 in bonus bets. When you win your first $5 bet, just visit fanduel.com bs to sign up. That is fanduel.com bs. Make every moment more with FanDuel, an official sports betting partner of the NFL, you must be 21 plus in president select states gambling prom.
Call win 800 gambler or visit theringer.com rg $10 1st deposit required bonus issued as non withdrawable bonus bets that expire seven days after receipt. Cterms at sportsbook fanduel.com so I'm going to throw narratives at you. The game is over on Sunday. You're stuffed because you ate too much. You're probably mad because you probably lost more than you won on all your collective bets. You're a little groggy.
Probably had $11,000 on the Chiefs, who covered and won. And then I lost 16 grand in props. Right.
And now you're thinking about us doing the pod that night. What's the lead of the pod? Let's talk about the possibilities. One would be if it was an incredible game and we said, oh, my God, that game. We'd do that thing. The second I think would be right. This is. This is three is this is now officially on and all that. We go that route. Then there's a Brock Purdy going that way where it's like, Brock Purdy, Mr. Irrelevant. How did he do this? Nobody thought all the money was on the cheese. The line dropped to one. What other narratives could you see leading the podcast a week from now?
You're saying positive, right? Because this would be a positive win for us. Yeah. Because I have to say one of my New Year's resolutions was to try to analyze these games from a positive perspective, and it's not easy to do. Right. You want to go after how did the Lions blow that? Dan Campbell sucks. That's your first thing. But I think those are all good. Shanahan got the monkey off his back. That'll be a big thing, right?
What if there was a Kelsey MVP? Taylor Swift Grammys tonight announced her new album. I think it's called Dead Poets Society. I didn't get the title. Sounds right, whatever it was. But Kelsey wins the MVP. He kisses Taylor Swift.
Yeah.
Oh, my God. We're going to Disney World and everybody, that half of the nation just gets completely pissed off, and we're, like, close to a civil war after that, they.
Go into the blue tent. They head into the blue tent. A camera opens it up, catches them nude.
We have to reproduce. We have to create the most special baby America has ever.
Think that's. Well, that'll probably. Honestly, no matter what, that's going to be it, right? Taylor was good for this team. Or, oh, the league fixed it so that the Chiefs won. Or. Yeah, screw you conspiracy theorists. The Niners won by ten. So what are you talking about? Right? I think we have to lead that.
I'm glad we talked this out, because you're right. Either way, it's Taylor Swift and Travis Kelsey somehow becomes the lead. Maybe not on our podcast, but just in general. Okay, we're into some props. This is your favorite, I would say. I don't know. How many days have you been immersed in props now? At this point, like three or four.
It's a lot. And, yeah, there's only been a few instances where there's been one week between the championship games and the Super bowl, but I almost think it's almost too long to study for a final exam. I mean, they did a great job fandol with these, and they're. No, no, there's more to come. Early, middle of the week, I was like, it's like when you come home from college and your mother makes corn fritters and then coconut shrimp. It's like, stop. It's too much. It's too much fried food.
I need to. Yeah. I found almost everything I wanted to find. They don't have some of the cross sports stuff yet. Right. Because it's too hard with the NBA to even know who's playing. But let's go. Let's just throw some favorite props out. You go first. All right.
I'm going to throw a couple. Well, first of all, let's start at the beginning. Tails, 30. Tails 27 heads in the 57 Super Bowls it won last year. Tails. Right. Remember Siriani was sobbing? Or maybe that was the anthem. I'm not sure. Coin toss or the anthem. But Simmons, you and I established last week that we believe in momentum, and that's how purdy was able to come back against the Lions. I believe in the momentum of tails. I'm going tails. -104 why another tail? No idea.
-104 they just get a 4% vague either way. That's right. Okay. Can we go a little earlier than the coin toss? Oh, yeah, sure. How much have you dove into Reba McIntyre. And this over under for the anthem. Right now it's 86 seconds and that might go up. And there's some juice on that. It's -145 -150 range, which seems super fast because we've had over unders for this that have gone over two minutes. One year. We had our buddy pr maven Lewis K was in the stadium and tipped us off and then was like, don't talk about this on the podcast. I might get in trouble. And then we immediately did. What was it? Do you remember what anthem that was?
I don't know. I think he was right.
No, he was right. He gave us a winner.
They tried to lock these down, but what you're saying a minute 26 minutes. 26.
So here's the last six. Stapleton 205. That went under. Mickey Guyton 135 went over. Jasmine Sullivan. Eric church 159 over. Demi Lovato 155 under. Gladys Knight 147 over. And then pink was two minutes under. So this is the shortest over under we've had in a while. And I go back.
You could go back even more. No one's hit 126. I'm looking at the list of in 20 years. Billy Joel, Carrie Underwood, Kelly Clarkson. 2012 was 134. That was the shortest.
You think Reba, I mean, she probably put some action on herself. Have we had a national anthem betting scandal yet?
No.
The easiest thing to rig.
Yeah. I don't know. We got to find out what her plans are afterwards, why she's trying to get the hell out of there.
Could she parlay herself with an adjusted 118? Adjusted. And she's just like, oh, flying through it. There you go.
Six lines. All right.
Speaking of a music thing, usher, one of the props was him playing. Yeah. As plus 200 as the favorite for opening song. Just coming out with that one. I like the plus odds.
You like for that one? Yeah. Okay.
Because he comes out, he's like, yeah. Everybody's like, yeah, let dancers things coming around. I like it.
You can't disagree with.
Yeah.
I mean, the opposite is no, yeah.
Kind of mood.
There's 114 to one ods. Jim Nance mistakes usher for John legend and is immediately canceled. So that. I don't know. Does Fandal have that?
That's not John legend, Jim. That's usher.
Jim, you might want to take that back.
Jim. Jim rush to judgment there, Jim. All right, what do you got? You're up. All right.
I'm going to give you one, though. These odds aren't that great. I'm going to give you two or three. But they hit, for crying out loud. Any player to score two or more touchdowns -165 again, I'm not doing you any favors with the vig, but last year Hertz had three. Higgins and cup both had two. The year before. Gronk the year before that had two. Damian Williams had two for the Chiefs the last time they beat the Niners, gronk again versus the Eagles, James White two or more, I mean, two or more touchdowns by a player in six of the last seven. And between Kelsey and CMC and Samuel Kittle and Iuke, that's a lot of nice options. I just feel like quarterbacks don't want to rock the boat if something's working in this game where there's abundable nerves surrounding the participants. So I like that.
That's a really good one cuz I like it. All right, I'm going to go big on this one with a big player here. Mahomes under 262.5 pass yards his last five weeks 242 215, 262-24-5235 since week nine, three of twelve games over 262. And I also think they've changed how they played. Like, I really think they want long drives, shorter games, move down the field. I think that Vegas game when that game was so embarrassing and they had some sort of come to Jesus moment and since then they just want these seven minute drives. They want to shorten the game. They just feel like they can win any 20 117 2017 24 to 20, just anything in that range and I don't see him airing it out. What's the best case scenario for Kelsey? Probably what did last week? It's like eleven catches for 100. Rice had a really good game too, and he still didn't get there. So the only thing that worries me is McKinnon's back, which is a better third down pass guy for him. And you could always get the one long pass that would eff this up. But I just don't see him chucking around.
I think they're going to have long drives.
I love this. Every year his yards go down and down and down and it doesn't mean he's worse. I'm going to put two stars by this because I think people will bet this over. Just be like, oh, Mahomes, I want to bet over. I want to bet Mahomes this and Mahomes that. But I think it comes in under. You're right, they play a different game and you're really going to have to take them out of their game plan to hit 263 or more. I think they'd have to be losing by ten or more. I just don't see that in the second quarter. Otherwise you're right. Just short stuff over the middle screen plays. Mahomes doing what he's doing or the.
Game goes to overtime and you get screwed that way. I went to the Knicks Lakers game with Dave Jacoby, who loves using fanduel and he's all excited. He's like LeBron, 25 points over. I have that with the Lakers and I'm like, I don't like it seems too easy, right? Everyone here who's better than that, the instinct is to always go over. I'm with you, Mahomes. This is 262.5 now. It's probably like 265 by game time. Yeah. And at that point they're going to have to be behind by 1014 points for him to hit that.
Yeah, they're not game planning for 280 yard game for him. I agree with that. All right, I'll give you one again. I'll be done with these bad ods in a second. But shortest touchdown under one and a half yards. I love this all year, but they only seem to have it up for like the Super bowl. It's -175 it should be about -250 this is the brother Bryce special. It's at four straight. It's at seven of the last eight. Same thinking here, CMC, everything down low for the Chiefs. Shovel pass or Pacheco. Pacheco himself has five 1 yd touchdown runs this year. And if you're a Chiefs, they're only going to win because of Taylor Swift conspiracies. You believe that there's going to be a phantom pass interference call in the end zone which automatically puts the ball to one. I think this should be like 250. It's 175.
So I really like that one. The only thing that worries me, Mahomes just doesn't score touchdowns anymore. Right? I don't think he has a touchdown this year. Is that possible? He has zero touchdowns because you know they're never going to have him do tush push any of that stuff because he got hurt. They basically retired that play. I'm looking at this, looking this up as we talking. Yeah, zero touchdowns this year for him. And then Purdy isn't exactly a tush pusher either. So you're looking at Pacheco or McCaffrey. But the good news with this is any pass interference in the end zone, the ball gets put on the one. And we've seen Pacheco and McCaffrey can go in. How do you say it?
People saying, I say Pacheco wrong. You say Pacheco.
That's Pacheco? Yeah.
You say it right, I'm being told I say it wrong. What do I say?
Pacheco.
I think I say pacheco. Like a y. Yeah, Pacheco.
You're making him sound like Sicilian Checo. Okay, Pacheco, what do you got? Speaking of quarterbacks and running stuff, Brock Purdy, over three and a half rushing attempts, plus 124 on fanduel. And maybe people have bet that since we're talking about this in the playoffs, had five carries. He had six carries during the season. In the Cincinnati game, he had six. Tampa had four. In Minnesota, he had five. In general against a good defense where they're pushing the pocket. And that was one of the keys to that Lions game was his ability to move around. I think he's able to do this against the Chiefs. We've seen quarterbacks with their legs beat them for first downs, and I just think he's going to run the ball four times. I was surprised. That was plus 124. I would have thought that would have been like. -150 I'm going to put two stars.
By it and I'll make you feel slightly better. This is a nice hedge if you like the Chiefs, because a kneel down counts as a carry. So if he takes three knees, you're a half away right there.
You know what I forgot when I was researching this? That Mahomes, he had hit the over and the rushing and they were running the clock out at the end and he lost 16 yards on three carries trying to run out the clock. It was one of the great prop losses.
Our friend Nick Santora had that and was devastated. I watched the game with him and he lost on that because of that, and he fled the state. He has not come back. Actually moved to Pennsylvania.
He was supposed to make his 7th action show for Netflix.
That's right.
That's it.
He's like, no, I can't do it.
Jason Statham's like, wait, I thought we're shooting on Monday. What do you have for your next one?
All right, how about this? First touchdown jersey. I love these. I just love it all. First touchdown jersey number. Over 19 and a half. So Debo is the cut off. I like over. You get Kelsey, you get McCaffrey, you get kittle, you get rice. Get most of the receivers. Over 19 and a half. You go under, you get the quarterbacks, you get Ayuk, and you get Debo. Did I miss somebody? And Pacheco, however you say it, you.
Like those bets where I actually have to do work to follow what's happening with the.
Watched.
I've watched huge football games with you. You can barely concentrate on anything once the game's going. So you're being calculating this as it's happening.
I'm thinking of bringing my son Jack's math tutor in with me to watch the games Super Bowl Sunday because I just have too much or an accountant or something.
All right, let's take a break. I have my favorite prop coming up next. All right, Sal, this is it. My favorite prop. You're going to do Gary Russell later. I'm doing mine now. Okay. This might be a little bit on Gary Russell's corner. And if it is, I apologize. That wasn't my intention. I just really like this bet. First TD of the game, Noah Gray. Okay. 43 to one. He caught two short touchdowns. In 2023. He had 28 catches for 305. For the year, he's 16 1st down catches. And in general, when the Chiefs get close to the again, Mahomes isn't going to run because they just don't. That plays out. Mahomes doing anything, running into the line. Push, push, push. Anything. And then it's like, well, he'll throw it to Kelsey then. No, the Noah gray. It's like the Super bowl was like when they love to have the cute play where it's like, oh, you thought I was going to do this. We did this instead, and all of a sudden, Noah Gray gets the first TD, and everybody's like, who the fuck is that? Right? 43 to one, Sal.
That's a large number, and it's the perfect name to piss everybody off.
Just complete. Just hostility immediately.
Fandel rakes in the IU. Kelsey, thank you. I'm good.
Yeah. All right, that's too high.
43 to one. That's too high. Let's see.
Okay.
All right, let's do Gatorade. Why not? Yellow, lime green, plus 380. Purple is favored at plus 225. Yellow green is three to one. Yeah, I'm getting it at three to one. Everyone bet big on purple. Last time these teams played because of Kobe in 57, it was purple. There were two blues before that yellow hit with Doug Peterson and the eagles. I think yellow is due also, if drunk Jason Kelsey urinates in the bucket, you automatically get the win for yellow. So that's what I'm going.
What would be the Vegas ties to the color?
Oh, right. Why didn't even think of.
Don't know. I don't even know what you would associate from a color standpoint with Vegas.
That logo that was supposed to trip everyone up for Ravens. Niners was purple a little bit, right? Purple and red.
Yeah.
So there you go.
I don't know.
I'm just saying green right there.
I love that. You bet on. So for my next one, I couldn't find this yet, and maybe it's not out, but is there a Jake Moody will miss a field goal prop?
I didn't see that either. I was looking for that. There will be.
I'd like to go blind. Just blind. I don't know the ODS yet. Blind on a parlay of Jake Moody misses a field goal and it's probably a little longer, but it goes over the upright and it seems like he missed it, but we're not positive. Parlayed with Adam Carola then babbling about how the upright should be taller for the next 25 minutes to a bunch of people who have to move to different sections to get away from him, even though he's probably hosting the party. So I have the parlay. I can't calculate those ods yet, but I think that Jake Moody misses Corolla for 1213 minutes of it. Straight 1213 podcast.
Straight Corolla wouldn't be happy if the uprights went like, through the moon, through the surface of the moon. He wouldn't be. It's not enough for him. I found ods for the miss. What do you think they are?
What is it? I'm going to say plus 120.
Oh, you're going to love this. Plus 210.
Oh, my God. That guy, he's not ready. That's one of my favorite ones.
But you lose if there's no attempt. That's the only thing. So he has to actually miss.
I think that guy, that is one of the Achilles heels of this Niners team. Right. I don't trust he's one of those when he comes out. I never think he's making it, so that would be a fun one. Plus 210.
Yeah, beautiful. That's good. All right, I'm writing it down.
All right, Rudy, what do you got?
Plus 210. I also have off of the Gatorade color of Brock Purdy's mom's minivan when she picks him up after the game. Red two to one. Green four to one. Clear. Nine to one. I don't know why clear is even in there.
No, they make clear minivans.
Isn't that strange? Why is it? Take me through this. Will the two minute warning come at exactly two minutes? The no is plus 310.
So that would be. They're running a play that goes over the two minute and the clock stops at 158. 157, yes. Counting the clock down in the two minute warning, and then it just stops at two minutes. Right.
Okay, so here's the thing. It's one of those plays where 49 ers have it, like, at their own 45, and they know they have no timeouts, but they know they could throw here because the clock is going to stop.
Right.
And so it's at 203 and they take it to 150. I don't know. I just thought that was too high for the. No, I'm probably off anyway.
Does seem high. Yeah. Does that mean I'm up? Yeah, go ahead. All right. I wrote an Amtrak Excel today from New York City to Boston. I had a great time. It was great to fly by Stanford and New Haven and New London and Providence. Seeing the sights really brought me back to my childhood. One of the things I did on this train ride was try to figure out the longest reception, and the instinct is to take, like Ayuk. He's the favorite. And his big receptions this year were 42, 76, 51. And then he had a 51 yarder in the playoffs that bounced off a guy's face.
Yes.
You might say Rice. Rice has had a couple of long ones over the years, over the months, but the one I settled on with great ods, and I love this for so many different reasons, is Valdez scantling. Longest reception of the game, plus 800. Now, this year he's had 47, 36, 34, and then the playoffs, he's had 32 and 32. We've also seen him drop a couple of long ass ones that he became, like, the enemy of Chiefs fans. Right? If we're talking redemption, redemption stories and just like, oh, think of all that. If a Chiefs win, what are some of the things that will happen? And he's already made a couple of big plays in the playoffs. But Valdez gantling with, like, a 60 yarder or a 65 yarder or 50 yarder. I just like the ods. I think he has as good of a chance as IU to bust one. And the Chiefs aren't giving up long. They didn't do it against Buffalo, and they didn't do it against Baltimore. Except for that Wednesday Flowers play.
Did he have the longest last game? This was 32, like you said. Oh, no.
I think somebody on Baltimore beat him.
Yeah. Flowers out of 54. How did that happen? Yeah, that's right. I don't know. Yeah, I think so. I think he's kind of like the guy who's like, he's the wrestler that's hiding under the ring during the Royal rumble. And then he comes out, he's like, wait a minute, I didn't know you were still in there. Much like he did against the Ravens. It was a long one, but it wasn't the longest. I like that. I think that's too hard.
They will throw to him. The script would have him catch one, one other one for this one that I thought was intriguing was McCaffrey was 18 to one, his longest this year, 35, 33 and 41 during the season. Then he had a 28 yard in the playoffs. But I was thinking like some like 70 1 yd wheel route, right? Where it's just like, oh, and he's in space and all of a sudden he's just gone because he's busted some big plays, but usually they're run.
What was those ods?
What were those 18 to one? Just seemed like too high, right?
All right, that's too many bets. These can't all win, right?
This is how we lose.
Aren't going to all win, right? Yeah, it's good to take some unders too. All right, well, I'll throw it at you, purdy. Interception. For all the reasons you brought up at the top of the podcast, right? It's only. -115 he's had seven in the last eight games somehow none versus the Packers a few weeks ago, even though he could have like three or four nerves could easily set in. Right. I also like Carl.
Wait, can you hold on on that one?
Yeah, go ahead.
What?
This is a similar thing to it.
But I had it down as well. He had eleven picks this season, right? But I watched a lot of niners this year. At least seven, eight drop picks for him. Only two had more dropped picks this season of games that I watched. So I'm with you. I think that minus there's another bet. The words just chiefs get the first interception is. -110 I don't know why we wouldn't.
Oh, that's a good one.
That's a good one, too.
I'm just going to add to that. These guys are linemen, but defensive linemen, Carlaftis 100 to one, Chris Jones 70 to one to get an interception. They don't accumulate a lot of picks, but can't you see it batted up at the line of scrimmage, especially if he's going to let the pocket collapse like he did in the first half in the last two games.
Or the screen pass where somebody jumps off, right?
Yeah, exactly.
All right, here's another one I really like. The Chiefs will have the longest kick return is -160 and the reason for this one is butker, the Chiefs kicker, is pretty touchback reliant. He just boots in the end zone and you don't return it. Whereas moody, especially if he loses confidence, misses a field goal, doesn't hit one. I just think the Chiefs will have more chances to have kick returns. So that's. -160. I don't love the ods, but I like the.
I like that a lot. I have something later to support that. I'll say this, though. I know the ODS suck for this, but Fendel has it at -330 other books have it at like -500 that the kickoff, the opening kickoff is a touchback or the player takes a knee. The Chiefs have 83% to your point. Touchbacks this year for butter, the league average is 65. Two Super Bowls in a row, there's been a touchback in the opening kick. All the Super bowl touchbacks in the opening kick occurred in the dome. I think this is the same story, but it's high. It's 330. Your way to do better.
I like it. You're up.
Okay. All right. These squares. Let's talk about these squares. You can go on fandol. This is perhaps the greatest invention since wireless that you could bet the 73 or the three three. You don't have to be stuck with these pools, with the two five or whatever.
Shit.
The nine numbers. Yeah, the nine eight. You're done, right? And not to mention, it's a pain, like collecting money. You and I have been at Super bowl parties.
You got these dead feet.
The anthem is about to end, and you're freaking out because only 70 boxes are filled. And it ends up being me, you, daniel and jimmy buy every box. So grab your zero zeros. Grab your three zeros. In this case, I like 73 for both sides. And this is cumulative. You get plus 550 and plus 600. And it goes throughout the game, throughout the. Not just the first quarter, not just the game. You get every quarter. At 73, both sides, if you take them, one's 551, 600.
That's a great one. Just in.
Squares are terrific. Yeah.
If you had told us 20 years ago that we would just be able to bet on our own personal squares on a website and that this would have been a thing that would have worked or in an app or. We didn't know what apps were in 2003, but great stuff. Casey to beat san francisco in overtime is 18 to one. Casey to win the first half. And the game is plus 190. And fanduel allows you to throw that in. Same game parlays and stuff. But my thing is, if casey is going to win the game, it's going to look like that ravens game and they're going to be putting all of the silverware into the sink in that first half the way they did and try to put purdy on his heels. And basically the same premise of what they did to lamar. Oh, you're going against patrick mahomes now. You're down seven and we have the ball to start the second half. You just know how it goes. But anyway, casey to win the first half in the game, plus, I think.
You'Re right, that's the more logical way to approach it. I feel like I owe this bet something because it's hit for me so many times. Niners first half. Casey game is eight to one. Casey first half, niners game is seven to one. They did it last week, san francisco. So it's been a crazy year, but I think you're away just that it keeps going 17 to one. This is interesting that the confetti that falls from allegiance Stadium following a game is made from shredded call girl pamphlets. I didn't even think that was allowed. But you think they'd be on top of that. All right, now here's a good one. Kelsey catches every target, plus 950.
I saw that one. He almost did this last week, right?
He did do it last week. He was eleven for eleven. He did it earlier in the year. He's done it twice this year in fewer than 19 games. So plus 950 is good. He might just be one of those things where he's just shorthanded, wide open, short routes, and God forbid if he catches one pass and goes out with an injury, you win that way, too.
That's pretty good. I looked at that hard. I kept thinking of Fred Warner, like, getting his hand in on one of them, though. Like, he goes eight for eight and then Fred Warner, like, David, Fred Warner, you killed us. No successful fourth down conversion in the game. Plus 300. Did some recon on this, I think, as I was passing through New London, I think I was looking this stuff up. Casey, for the season only they've had 20 total, they've made ten. They're 50%, which is weird. That's basically like one a game. There's some teams that are like, in the 50s, they're two out of three. In the playoffs, San Francisco for the season, 13 total, they hit seven. Yeah, in the playoffs they're over one. Both of these teams are really conservative and I don't really fully understand it because you would think, like, they're both have Kansas City as an explosive quarterback. The Niners have an explosive offense. I was really surprised by that. Anyway, plus 300 where it seems like that should be even ods.
I like that. And you're right. I think the parlay kid went over that against all ods. He was shocked at how few fourth down conversions the Niners had this year. The one thing I'll say is I think I like that bet better two weeks ago or three weeks ago. But they're explosive, the offense, but they have a kicker that's exploding, too. His mind is exploding. So they might go for it on fourth and three. Get aggressive where they normally wouldn't.
What do you got?
This is dumb, but exact points scored for Kansas City. 17 is ten to one that hit four times this year. 27 is twelve to one that hit three times this year. It's again, it's another way of doing like squares and stuff. But really we're playing craps here, right? We're just throwing a million things in the middle. Bet the yo, bet everything. But it kind of is the last game, so we got to do it.
We're going to take a break and we'll do MVP and we'll unveil the Gary Russell pick for 2024 Super Bowl 58. Named after a number of that. We could only come up with Jack Lambert as famous number 58. That's next. All right, Sal, let's do MVP first. The ods that jumped out to me were Kelsey at 17 to one and going to narratives and just what's the Hollywood ending here? Is Kelsey winning the MVP and kissing Taylor Swift at the end of the game. I don't think he's looked that good, especially in the second half of the season. But in the playoffs there's been a little bit of a resurgence and I thought he was lights out last week against Baltimore. So Cup won the mvp, Julian Edelman won it and San Antonio Holmes won it. Those were the last three receivers. Tight end Kelsey is really a receiver that have won in the last 15 years, but the 17 to one, I was really surprised the ODS were that high. Well, we gave this Mahomes isn't going to win it. If Mahomes isn't going to win it, Kelsey is going to win it. And if you think the Chiefs are going to win, it's either Mahomes or Kelsey.
So why is Kelsey 17 to one?
He was 23 to one last week when we liked it and now I think we moved the line on people. I apologize for that, but it still seems too high. I'm with you. All right. So I'm trying to think, like, if Mahomes has four touchdowns and Kelsey has two of them, who do you think they give it to? I guess it depends which ones are important towards the game. Right?
What if it's a 21 to 2020, 117 23 to 17 type game? Kelsey has the only two touchdown catches. Kelsey has eight first down catches. He finishes ten for 132. Nobody else in the Chiefs has more than 40 yards receiving. And maybe Mahomes throws a pick. There's a path.
Let me ask you this. The fact that Mahomes won the two times that they were Super bowl champs, does that make you think, all right, there's a little fatigue. He doesn't have to be a three time winner.
Fatigue.
I'm looking at his numbers. He had 182 yards passing last year and won it. He did have three touchdowns.
It's just like if he has a typical Mahomes game, it's going to be 250 yards, two touchdowns. Just this version of Mahomes we're watching now. And then he'll get five for 42 rushing yards. Something like that. One more Kelsey bet. I really like, let me do the.
MVP real quick because I have it. Oh, yeah, my bet also. Yeah, no, it's all right. Take the 17 to one for sure. That's a better number. But MVP other than quarterback is plus 200. So that's any other position. The last ten, there's been six quarterbacks and four non quarterbacks. So plus 200 is a decent number. If you look at the last decade, McCaffrey, Kelsey could burst out defense, which has happened fairly recently. Who knows? So I like that number.
Well, speaking of Kelsey, him to have the most receptions in the game is plus 170. And I was looking at it. I think I was passing maybe the Rhode island border at this point. Kelsey had eight plus catches four times this season. Rice had eight plus four times. Kittles had eight plus twice. Ayuks only had it once, and McCaffrey and Debo zero times, which made me think rice is plus 220 for most receptions. Kelsey is plus 170. You could almost bet both and just say you bet 100 on either. On both of them, you either win 71 20 or you lose 200 if George Kittle ends up having the most catches. Right? Right. So I think it's going to be Kelsey or Rice and the Kelsey plus 170, I'm actually surprised. That's not like even odds.
I think it's going to be even ods. I think it's going to get there as we're talking this through. Is Kelsey going to be the most bet on non quarterback in Super bowl history? I feel like we just talked about eight Kelsey bets. That all sound great.
Well, remember we had this two years ago with Cooper cup and I think just about all of them hit that came through and they threw to them over and over and over again as the game went on. Right. If you think the Chiefs are going to win, Kelsey is going to have to have a good game. There's no other path.
But how many 13 year olds are asking their dad to put $20 on Kelsey to score first or Kelsey to win MVP? I don't think we've ever 13 year old girls. I don't think we've ever had that before.
I say 16. You're probably right. I might be wrong. You don't think this is happening for Brandon lafell ten years ago in the Patriots? Well, you also have the segment of the country now that hates Kelsey and Taylor Swift. And every time he gets a catch.
Screw that guy. Exactly.
So he's got the most eyeballs on him of any non QB we've had in a long time. Right. No non QB patriot ever ascended to these kind of visibility, fame, heights. Randy Moss, I don't even know if he got there.
No Jerry Wright. So we have to really consider just the last 15 years or so.
Last 25. It's like no steeler, no packer, no cowboy. What? We have made the Super bowl. You're right.
No. Yeah. I mean, Manning wouldn't be a steeler. Like you said, saints, ravens, seahawks. I don't even know Terrell Davis. I'm not sure who's close.
He's absolutely, outrageously, ridiculously famous. And you can make a case he's more famous than Mahomes right now. The Taylor thing has. Anyway, we don't need to rehash it. All right, do you want to do Gary Russell or do you want to do favorite same game parlays?
I have a couple others. I have two to one ods. Sometime this week, Dan Campbell spotted at a blackjack table splitting tens. I could see that. I think that's probably good money there.
Splitting tens against today's.
Yeah, 25 to one. Following the game, Brock Purdy holds up the Lombardi trophy and screams into the camera, can you smell what the Brock is cooking? That would be interesting. That's all I got. It's all nonsense.
I wish there was a way to bet on the CBs when they do the thing like Brock Purdy's journey for Mr. Relevant and they spend three days making that cartoon package where he's like wearing a cowboy hat and riding a horse. And he's riding next to Trey Lance's horse. And then Trey Lance's horse falls off a cliff. Interesting. They spent like $50,000 on the stupid cartoon on the graph. Nance has to narrate it. Look at him riding there. Tony, he's riding in Jim, he's riding the horse.
And then someone at the end, they have. The graphic is buried in a Vegas desert by Tommy Devito's agent.
All right, before we do Gary Russell, here's my favorite same game parlay. Go ahead. Right now it is over 13 to one. Ods, Kansas City to win first half game, Mahomes under two six, 2.5. We discussed Noah Gray over one and a half receptions and Pacheco. Not Pacheco. Pacheco, 70 plus yards rushing and that is 13 plus 1316.
Is that that high?
Yeah.
I didn't hear anything I didn't like.
Oh, man. Yeah, so I'll do that again. Casey to win first half game, Mahomes under two six 2.5 Noah Gray, two catches, Pacheco 70 plus rushing earth.
All right, I don't have one. That sounds good because I.
Well, you have the Gary Russell, which is way more. I got to pick it up.
Yes.
Backstory. It's Super Bowl, Steelers, whatever. Steelers and cardinals. Great. Super bowl. Really enjoyable. And you did a prop. We had the podcast at that point. And you did a prop and it was Gary Russell. What was it for? Three yards, four yards?
No, to not score a touchdown.
To not score a touchdown. That's what it was.
So this is their backup running back, right?
It was fast.
Willie Parker was their starter, right? Yeah, I think that year. Yeah. So. -150. To not score a touchdown. The backup. And this is, I think, the first year I picked an obscure player to not do something. -150 not only did he score the first touchdown, he had two carries inside the three yard line in that first drive or the first drive that they scored.
It was like they listened to the pod and they just wanted to mess with you.
And then someone wrote in and said that months later that they were laughing when Gary Russell scored. And across the room, this guy heard a woman Laugh and they got together. They had never met each other and they discussed it and they're like, oh, do you listen to the. Yeah, yeah. Those two ended up getting married based on the Gary Russell prop bet. And we've never heard if they've stayed. I think the woman is now dating.
I don't know.
I don't know. She's with Kanye. Is that who she's with? I'll have to look that up. Someone let us know. But anyway, every year I try to pick an obscure name and top the.
I was, as you were talking there at the end, I was looking up Gary Russell to see what happened to him, and there's apparently a boxer named Gary Russell.
I know I got in that rabbit hole, too.
A featherweight who held the title for like seven years. I don't watch the featherweights, so, yeah, we probably should have put some Gary Russell's bet. All right, here we go. You ready? SB 58, the Gary Russell prop. Here we go.
Okay. I really thought about this because I think last year, and maybe even two of the last three years, the name has been so obscure, they haven't even made the roster. Like, they were inactive by Sunday, and that sucked. And then everyone got mad at me and whatever, but this guy's making the roster. He's playing. He's actually a name that's less obscure than those that I've gone with. Right. I went with, who's your tight end? The Patriots. He was like, from Samoa. I think I went with that. Right? I went to a bunch of them. I really try to go obscure. Not this year. Richie James returns a punt or a kick for a touchdown. 30 to one ODS, Kansas City Chiefs, 2018. He had a kick return for a touchdown as a member of the 49 ers. So we'll hear all about that. I just see it. Second quarter. Simmons following a Jake Moody field goal that grazes the crossbar and goes in, much like you described, san Francisco feeling good about themselves. Richie James, former mid Tennessee state blue Raider, takes the kickoff 92 yards to pay dirt. And that dirt is going to pay well.
30 to one, buddy. Let's do this. Gary Russell.
So is it Richie James? It has to be a special teams td.
That's right. Punt or kick return?
I got to say, I bet on what your Gary Russell pick was going to be, and I lost.
You did? What'd you like? What'd you have?
I thought it was going to be Blake Bell, the third string Casey, tight end. He fit your profile. Yeah, I like that.
I've been screwed with the tight ends, though. The third string tight ends usually get cut before game time, but Richie James, he's doing it.
Richie James, I like it. So you researched all his returns?
I did.
Teams over the years close.
Yeah, he's done it. And I just think it's going to be like a weird punting. Kickoff situation. Moody. Whatever. 30 to one is a good number.
God bless you, Richie James, where does this line end? Where are we at on a week from now?
I think two. I don't know why? I think sharp money will come in on two. I mean, they are giving it to us with the teaser, aren't they? We're going to get eight and a half at this point and you just.
I think it goes to one and a half. One and a half? Yeah.
So your big bet is going to be Casey and the over on a teaser?
No, my big bet is going to probably be Casey and the under. Really? Because the under goes all the way up to 53 and a half. And if the working theory is that the Chiefs are either going to win or hang around, it'll be a slow paced game. And 53 and a half is a lot, man.
27, 24 is a lot of scoring for these teams that take forever to get down.
54 is like 30 to 24 or 30. 27. Somebody's getting to 30 at 54. Yeah, like 28, 27 beats it, but it would basically have to be 30. All right, we're all done. Are you sad that we're done with Super bowl props? We have more coming. The good news is fandom is going to just give us. It's like at Christmas when you're done eating and then somebody's like, how about some pigs in the blanket?
They don't stop. They don't stop. There's more gifts for us. More, more coming. Yeah. I love it. I love it all. I'm going to be with the ringer wise guys in Vegas this week. We'll be on radio row on the fandol stage. We're doing Ringer wise guys from there, doing cousin Sal's winning weekend from there, interviewing a bunch of ex athletes and current athletes, and I'm sharing a room at the luxury with Harry. I've really made it in this.
Oh, my God.
Yes. 320 pound man snoring a mere feet away from me at the media hotel.
I would hesitate at sharing an Uber with Harry, much less a hotel room and a bathroom.
It's at the Luxor, though. Come on. We're good.
I had some media friends asking me about the Luxor and it's like, didn't you used to make fun of the Luxor because they had cigarette burns on the. Yeah, yeah, that's actually true. It's a dark place with burns on the table. Maybe they fix some of it.
The cigarettes have cigarette burns. That's how bad it is there. The ones that they give out. Good Lord.
That's it for our Super bowl props, though. But we're going to take a break and do a few more things here. We're going to do a little NBA, then some parent corner. We affected the Tibeto line last week. It was like 95 to one. Now it's 26 to one and dropping. Although they did lose to the Lakers on Saturday. I actually went to the game. They didn't have Ananobi. They didn't have a lot of good. Grimes Randall's out for a couple of weeks, but the trade deadline is coming. They have fouriers contract to trade. I personally think they're going to get Malcolm Brogdon and they'll trade like one of their picks they have and they'll bring him. They need one more scoring guard. The Lakers just like basically double team Brunson in the fourth quarter and stole the game from him. But I still like Tibeto. Even at 26 to one, I still like it.
Yeah. So the question is always where does this team have to end up? Right? What seed?
I think they get a two seed because now we have Embiid who doesn't look like he's going to come back. This know they can't decide who they are week to week. Miami can't get their shit together so it just feels like they could sneak out of two seed if they get the two seed. Watch out man. I'm afraid of the next. The other thing that really changed since we did this last week and I'm not allowed to vote, but I love talking about it is now that Embiid is no chance. Yokich suddenly is -150 how fast did that go? Where did he start and where did it jump up to?
Just from before the MB news he was 390 or four to one.
Yeah, right in there.
And now he's favored your SGA, not your pick, but the fact that you gave it out at ten to one, he's plus 230 is right behind him.
Yeah, because we always love talking about the value. The only one that I was kind of staring at a little bit just from a value standpoint is just the plus 650 on Yanis because Yanis is like. He's just putting crazy games and he's like a man possessed. And now that they fixed their coach, could he just go on this super duper run and then know cools off? Or maybe they don't care. The only thing with Denver is all these teams are bunched together for the 1234 and I actually think they're going to have to care as the season goes along, so that helps the Yokich case.
Why would you like Tibido but not Brunson, who I pointed out to you yesterday, was tied with Tatum odds wise, and now it's ahead. He's 55 to one, Tatum 75 to one. Just as a value. If you think they can get the two seed, what's the difference in terms of how a voter would look at that?
Because he's just not the best guard in the league. I love the thing. Like you could feel it. He is insanely popular. Jacoby was saying it was a little like that Isaiah Thomas Celtics year when Isaiah Thomas was just awesome and he was just, the team was on his back and it didn't matter how he defended him. He was still getting points at the end of games. But I think that ceiling's like top four. Top him. Him being a top five mvp. That would be amazing if he finished fifth or fourth.
But if he got votes, yeah.
I just don't see how. If it's him versus SGA, how does Brunson beat SgA? Sga is like 30 plus a game. They have the best record in the league. Or second best record in the league.
Yeah, the team would have to go on a nosedive a little bit, but you don't see.
No, I think with OKC, the Shay ODs at plus 230 with the trade deadline coming up, that's a team that could have Quinn Capella in like five days or whoever. They could add a guy.
I was so mad at your team the other night. So mad. I don't know if you. Because we texted about it and I had three soccer games in and I just needed Celtics moneyline over the Lakers before they announced that Davis and LeBron were out. I was like, oh, I'm sitting pretty. How does that happen? How can people avoid that trap? Because we both knew, like, oh, this game's over. The Celtics, if they lose by fewer than ten, it'll be a miracle.
I texted you guys, our wise guys text. The Lakers were up to plus 15 and I was like, this is ridiculous. I know what's going to happen in this game. The Celtics, they shot five free throws the whole game, jacked up threes, complete mail in coaches benching guys. And then the other piece of it, which it's not nothing, is that those guys played really hard because LeBron wasn't playing. There was definitely some stuff there. I could feel it. Last night in that Knicks game. He doesn't seem happy, and we've seen him in this spot maybe eight of the last ten years, where we get to January, February, and he's just not happy with this team. But can you imagine being on his team where? Imagine with our wise guy show, and I was just like, no, man, we got to get this wise guy show going. If this show doesn't get better. Hourglass emoji. Can you imagine the text threads? Like, you'd be like, what the fuck's wrong with it? Why isn't he just saying, like, hey, great job, guys. Good show, right? It's just such a lead.
Is that what you honestly really think?
I feel like it's telling that I'm worried about it. Yeah. It's just a weird way to lead and manage. Like, you're the best guy in the team. Nobody's going to say shit back to him. And everybody's always available. It's never his fault. Everyone's available for trade. I don't know, man. Reeves has been playing pretty well. Russell's been playing pretty well lately. I don't know what kind of team he expects to have.
I think LeBron, his plan has changed considerably from a year ago, from six months ago, from three months ago. Honestly, like that whole, I'm playing with Bronnie. I saw Bronnie play. I went to USC, Oregon this week. I'm no expert evaluator, but it would be a stretch, I think, at this point.
I know he's not in the mock drafts anymore. He fell out of both rounds.
No. So that plan. Okay. Playing with the son, playing with the Lakers, playing with your son, is another pipe dream at this point. So I don't know. I really think, for the first time in a while, LeBron himself doesn't know what he's doing.
Yeah. And I don't know what the trade is either, because I don't know who wants Russell for $18 million. Right? What are you getting back? If you're the Lakers, do you want to trade your last remaining first round pick to not even know if you're a top four team in the west? I don't know what the move is right now. Their over under is -140 at 43 and a half wins, favorite to make.
The playoffs, favor to make it at -144 there's a trade I really love.
And it won't happen, but the most fun trade for basketball is if he gets traded to the warriors and it's Kaminga and Clay and maybe some pick swap down the road, and it's just we'll take LeBron for three months, and then he can declare for free age. See Clay gets to go back to Lakers. His dad played there, and the Lakers get Kaminga out of it. And then they put together the old guy super team in gold State, and it would just be like, holy shit, it's LeBron and Chris Paul and Curry. I don't know.
LeBron could see Bronnie play in an hour. He could fly.
Yeah, right.
Still. Still be able to do it.
But I mean, the college seasons, there's like four weeks left or five weeks left. Yeah, that's true. Something like, just. I don't know what the trade is for them, and I don't know, man. When you're paying $100 million for two players in the NBA these days, it's tough to put a good team around it.
It's not a great winning formula.
The hourglass emoji. It's just such a weird way to behave as the best guy. And then they do the press conferences. Imagine if Austin Reeves was like, yeah, man, I don't know what the fuck's wrong with that guy. We're out here, like, trying hard every night. Would he be wrong to say that I'm working my ass off? I don't know. I'm Austin Reeves. I'm 23. I'm doing my best.
I would love to know the biggest shit talker text chain in sports. Wouldn't you just love it?
Michael Irving, if there's like a non LeBron Lakers text threat, they're just like.
I just want to know all of them. I want somebody to like, they talk about our fantasy league as the most popular, one of the more popular. I want to know which sports text chain is the best. Like, michael Irvin told me he's on a text chain with all the other 88. Drew Pearson des Bryant CD. Lamb. Yeah. I was like, oh, my God, that is so fucking cool. Yeah. It's just very positive and inspirational. We all tell CD, like, go be the best 88 ever. Like, wow. I want alternatives to see what it.
So the text thread is just called 88.
Just 88. The 88 chain, he calls it.
That's pretty good digress. I don't know what the move is for LeBron, because the Lakers, there's no trade that's going to propel them. The league is too good. And I don't think there's a team for him to go to. Miami is playing like crap. That's not going to fix them. Cleveland is doing great with that. They won 13 less 14. Yeah, philly, you would have said maybe, but now I'm beats hurt. So they're out that's probably why he's frustrated, because it's basically like he's been checkmated for the season. I don't blame him for being frustrated, but I think it's a weird way to lead a team.
Is there an emoji that communicates, hey, all I ever wanted to do is win the in season tournament. Screw the rest of you people. Is that similar to an hourglass?
I still think the team they have now, they can play defense. Davis has played really well this year. He's been healthy. Russell's been a pretty good Trick or treat offensive guy. And Ria, I don't know, man. I don't think that team's as bad as maybe he's making it seem. But what do I know? Conference and division. Right now my soft ass Celtics are plus 125. The Cavs are still 13 to one even though they've been playing great and who knows what they'll do at the trade deadline. And Miami is still at 16 and one, too. But to me the east is wide open. I don't feel good about the Celtics at all. I think heading into tonight they were eleven and six and they were last 17. Then they killed Memphis tonight. I went with my daughter. Memphis had dudes. Memphis brought in two guys that I'd never heard of before. Really? I was like, I literally don't know who this is. And they had Scotty Pippa Jr. Was out there and Gigi Jackson. It was weird.
But you mentioned the Cavs real quick. I think you moved that line, too. Was it on this podcast you said to win a division? I think it was like plus 290 or something. What is it? Plus 180 now for that?
The Cavs are good. Like they've stumbled into this Mitchell and defense formula. They have shooting and they're playing well. I don't know what happens when they bring Garland back. Yeah, one of the bets that would be fun is the one seed bet, but I haven't seen that in a while because trying to bet on who's going to get the one seed in the Western Conference would be good. They have one about LeBron scoring his 40,000 regular season points. See that one they've had that for?
Yeah.
So it looks like they're thinking it's like maybe March 2 range at Denver plus 320. He'd probably want to do it on a national tv game, right? I'm guessing, yeah.
It's just tough because if he has twelve points to go and the next game is on the road, he's not going to skip that, right? Well, maybe he would. Who the hell knows? I like the method of basket, but even though this is highly contested by a lot of the gamblers out there. But dunk plus 650. Make a statement, LeBron, to break the record.
Dunk plus 650, other is plus 303 point. Plus 270 layup, plus 175 free throws, plus 420. So other is like a turnaround jumper, jump shot. Yeah. Or like a hook shot, right? Yeah.
Well, I guess any jump shot that's not a three, right? Yeah.
Three point field goal, plus 270 is pretty good.
I like them all. Let's just bet them all.
Let's do parent corner. Today's parent corner is brought to you by Carmax. Every day as a parent is filled with lots of decisions to make for your kids, and they aren't always easy. Another big decision, buying a car. You got to think about what make and model you want. If you need four wheel drive, the gas mileage, and so much more, well, luckily, Carmax is here to help simplify things. You can shop their nationwide inventory and easily find a car that'll work for you. And more importantly, you could take a full month, up to 1500 miles to love your car or return it, guaranteed. That's the 30 day money back guarantee. Learn more and find a car you'll love today@carmax.com. What do you got?
All right, I got a couple. Neither of these are great. Well, speaking of three pointers, my ten year old had a basketball game, and I try to tell him he's great at rebounding the ball, he's great at steals. I'm like, go down low. Chase every free throw, chase every shot, every missed shot. There's a million missed shots on your team. Just chase them.
Dang.
Okay, he gets there. I don't know what's going on. I think because Harry was in town this weekend, he's showing off. He took eleven threes and made two of them, and he was just driving me nuts. And the two that he made, it didn't matter if he missed the five before, and they were terrible shots. He's holding up the three and the circle and everything, and I'm like. I'm putting my head in my hands. I'm like. And they end up losing the game. And we're walking to the car, and I'm just about to have the conversation with him, like, listen, I don't want to watch you miss threes all game. I really. We're waking up at stupid hours and driving you long distances. I don't want to watch what I.
Tell Jason Tatum is the same thing. Let's go to the basket, Jason. Go to the basket, Harrison.
Right, the same thing. It's like you understand you getting a rebound, shooting from close range. You're going to end up with more points than if you go two for eleven. I'm trying to do the math for him and everything. Before we get to the car, the opposing coach is there and he says, man, you're a great three point shooter. Keep it up. Keep it up, man. You're one of the few players in the league that I get nervous when he's shooting a three. I said, are you in my head? I'm going to open this car, we're going to get in. I'm going to yell at this kid for shooting threes. Why are you telling him he should shoot more threes unless it's because you want to win? He's like, no, man. This kid, like, I actually said it to the guy. He's like, no, he should keep shooting the threes.
Trying to jedi mind trick him. What the hell?
And then I'm like, I guess it doesn't matter. It's a Steph Curry universe now, right? So they're going to do whatever they want.
You think he'll have like a step back three in like two years? I don't know what it is.
I just don't like watching it. Right? Wouldn't you rather him be, if he's a presence inside, wouldn't you rather watch your kid bang and get like twelve points that way and put it launched stupid?
That's a tough age for basketball. That's when they're all just jacking up the other one.
We had my son's birthday party. Why we're doing this a little late. It went to like 730. And my oldest says, hey, you got to get me into the gym. I have a pass. He doesn't. I was like, what are you talking about? I have to go do a podcast and everything. He's like, yeah, but I can't get in the gym unless you show up. So you could just run your thing. I was like, first of all, then we find out the gym is not even open. He's like, all right, I'll go to a 24 hours gym. It's now 08:00 on Sunday night. He's going back to college tomorrow morning. I said, what are you doing? He's like, I got to keep this streak up. I have a streak of going to the gym, much like our friend Rick Rosner, who ended up being a total mental case. But I was like, you're no son of mine. To quote a Phil Collins line, going to the gym, keeping up a streak. So I don't know. I got sons shooting threes and going to the gym. I want to see. I need to take a paternity test, I think.
I was on the road all last week because we were doing the rewatchables tour. And I can't describe how little time my son had for me for faceTimes, texting calls. I might as well have just gone to Mars. And that's it. I'm texting him like, hey, how was lacrosse today? Hey, what's going on in school? Yo, talk later. Just like nothing. Facetiming them. Hey, it was brutal. And I was just thinking like, is this what the rest of my relationship with my son's going to be? He's going to go to college. I'm just like, two word texts, brief FaceTimes. Him just sending me right to voicemail. Is this just the rest of my life? Is this what it's going to look like?
I don't remember. I'm with you. And the hours and hours of text between your text and their response is really disappointing. I don't even remember dating. Not that we had text with dating, but there's no feeling like, it's like, oh, man, really? That was funny. I had to think about that and I think it's interesting. Really? You don't care to not text me back? It just sucks. We're not cool.
Yeah, the opposite. Like, I came to Boston to see my daughter and we went to the celtic game. She was so excited to see. And it's just girls are just nicer than guys. It's just the reality. Then I was thinking how I was on the road for a week and I didn't check in with my mom once. And then I checked in with her on Friday because I was walking to our venue. Or I checked in on Saturday, I was walking to the Knicks game and, you know, the italian thing where. No, it was never said. I think she was happy to hear me, but it's just the undercurrent of, well, it was good to hear from you. You can't get through the call without the dig. I have a self corner. I have a Simmons Corner. We were out on the road all week and I was really disciplined. I really wanted to have energy for the shows. I wanted to peek. I was eating dinner at like 04:00 so I wouldn't be sleepy when we're doing the things I wasn't going out after and trying not to eat candy at night, anything so I could get my good six, 7 hours in.
I'm like, I just got to get to Friday night. We're doing the Friday night show and then I'm going to actually go out. And we ended up, we're at the Bowery Hotel and there was a bunch of us, including Dave Jacoby, who, as you know, is one of my kryptonites. And it was a long night and it ended with a few of us at Prince street pizza, getting two big boxes of pizza and then bringing it back to the hotel. And I had two pieces of pepperoni that like square off sky high.
Pepperoni like three inches, right?
Yeah, 230 in the morning. Yeah, just pepperonis are falling off. I'm like. And I just could not have felt worse the next day. This was like a typical Friday 20 years ago. The next day I was like, you would have thought, like, I got dropped out from the 6th floor, just on the street. It's like, oh my. Five drinks and two pieces of pizza and I feel like I need my liver taken out. Anyway. We're just old. We're old.
The regurgitatables tonight at 08:00 p.m.
I can't have five tequila and sodas and two pieces of pizza. And my whole next day is ruined. I still don't feel good.
No, well, text Ben in California.
Yeah, well, I'll text him. I'll let you know when you hear. All right, that's it for paracorder. Today's paracorder is brought to you by Carmax. Parenting is always going to be a little tricky and filled with split second decisions. But buying a car doesn't always have to be with Carmax. Shop their nationwide inventory to find a car that fits what you're looking for. Buy with confidence because you can take a full month, up to 1500 miles to make sure you really love your car or return it. That's the 30 day money back guarantee. Learn more find a car you'll love today@carmax.com. All right, so when are you going to Vegas?
That's it. We'll be there on radio roll. Wednesday, Thursday, Friday. We'll be at the Fanduel party Friday night. Again with the ringer wise guys. And Harry will be there, by the way. Real quick, Harry, this should be part of my parent corner. Another thing, I bought this contraptment that I hate. When people don't have their phone in their car, they just leave it like they don't have a holder. Do you have a holder for your phone in the car.
No, you don't.
Why? You just, like, lay it down, put.
It in the middle between the seats.
And then you pick it up and look at it. And a light. I have mine set, and it's too low for me, so I bought this contraption. I got, somehow, on some algorithm, bought this contraption where you could hang it from your rear view mirror. Now, some people will say, this is dangerous. I say, no. I say, looking down at ways is dangerous. And then looking up. I want to keep it up there by this rear view mirror.
It's almost like a quarterback. You want your act right there over.
The line of you. I want that. And if so happens, I'm streaming, needing the Celtics to close out a parlay, and they can't beat the Lakers. I'll be able to watch that, too, right there. So, I'm very excited about this thing. I set it up, and I'm like, oh, crap. I need another piece to get this going. I know just what I need. It's in my house. So I put it on the passenger seat, and then I forget about it until the next morning. And the next morning, we're driving to Harrison's basketball game, and Harry gets in the passenger seat and sits on this thing and breaks it in three pieces. And I was so damn excited. I was like, you know what? I just can't have nice things. He's like, oh, look at this. Oh, well, he drops it into the side container.
Oh, my God.
That's my roommate.
Now you get to share bathroom at the Luxor with them.
Shoot me.
Can we just live stream that on Fandel tv? Just midnight to.
Yeah, yeah, if they're okay with a murder. Yeah, I think so.
It's just you guys in two beds next to each other with the tv in the middle and the one bathroom.
I don't know. I haven't seen the room yet, but I think that's how it works.
Yeah. Wow. Does Harry snore? What's the snoring?
Yeah, he's a bad snorer, too. I got to figure it out. I don't think rooms are that much now, actually, this week, I saw something. I might get the hell out of there. We'll see.
Well, isn't it that because both teams have been in the Super bowl and especially the Chiefs, this used to happen with the Pats. There'd be less Pats fans every year because everybody made the pilgrimage. Yeah, I think. But San Francisco, I would assume, would have a bunch of fans there.
Yeah, I agree. I wonder if, but I just feel like there's more media now than ever.
Right?
Yeah, that's where the rooms get gobbled.
Oh, people have to break down the big game. Yeah, nobody's doing that anymore. All right, cuss. As always, good job by you. Good job by you, buddy. All right, that's it for the podcast. Thanks to Kyle Creighton and Steve Cerruti. As always, I am not positive of the schedule this week, but I do know this. Rosila and I are doing a big trade deadline extravaganza on Thursday. I might have a podcast on Tuesday, but if not, I will see you on Thursday. Don't forget YouTube.com slash billsimmons for clips from this podcast, as well as dumb little walk and talk shorts that I love doing as I walk around and just think of weird things to put up there. So that's it. I will see you later in the week. Wanna see them on a waste I don't have with them on the wayside on the first side I don't have must be 21 plus in president select states, Fando is offering online sports ragering in Kansas under an agreement with Kansas Star Casino, LLC. Gambling problem call 1800 Gambler or visit fanduel.com RG in Colorado, Iowa, Kentucky, Michigan, New Jersey, Ohio, Pennsylvania, Illinois, Tennessee, Vermont, and Virginia.
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