Hour 1: A Broken Doc Rivers
The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz- 1,222 views
- 26 Aug 2020
Dan Le Batard and Stugotz ask what food sounds the best when you bite into it, the saddest no-hitter in MLB history, the NBA continues to show how it’s the leader in sports leagues, Doc Rivers’ emotional postgame statement, can the show get Stugotz to work on his messay and more.
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This is the down labor part. Sure, we've still got Sparkasse. So we've got NBA players possibly boycotting the playoffs, Nick Nurse has talked to the Raptors about that based on what happened with Jacob Blake in Wisconsin. Being shot in the back several times by police officers in front of his loved ones, we've got. Billy wondering aloud whether we just witnessed as a sports community, the saddest no hitter in the history of no hitters, Mike just learned right now that there was a no hitter, the biggest star in the world, though he may be a fraud, according to Strogatz, is leaving Barcelona.
We'll get to that in a second. But the first thing I want to get to is what it is you were arguing about before the show. I couldn't tell what the argument was. Was it the best first bite in food for taste or was it the best first bite in food for sound? I could not tell what you guys were arguing about because it just ended up being about, oh, a delicious hamburger. Oh, a delicious hot dog.
But it started out as toast. And I thought you guys were arguing about sound, did not taste. What were you arguing about.
Yeah. Really kind of hijacked the game because Billy took a bite of toast and we heard it and we were like and Tony and I were like, what a delightful sound. So we just started saying, what is the best sound of a bite you can take of all foods and really kind of shifted the game to, he said, bacon crackling on the stove, which is a different game. That's the best sound of preparing a food. So those are the two games we've been playing this morning.
I think Roy's game is actually easier to play because outside of Tostes, right? Maybe some cereal, maybe potato chips, there's not a lot of foods that have a good sound when you chew them.
Roy expanded the game, Roy's game is a better game. It's just the best food sound in general. I think that's a much better game to play, not the best first bite, the best food sound in general. And for me, it is bacon cooking on a pan that is OK.
But now you're not doing first bites anymore. You're just doing the sound of something. And basically that sound wouldn't mean anything to you if it wasn't accompanied by the smell, smell, smell. The smell is the thing that gets you with cooking bacon or sound soup.
The slurping sound, oh, no, that's totally not. That's a top three sound for me, like I like toast, there's number one and outside of that, a soup slurp. Great. Are you kidding?
I don't think most people would put soup slurp in their top three sounds that food make. I'm actually more interested, Chris, as you've tried to carve a path for yourself, a career in radio expertise, do you go to sleep at night thinking how to make these conversations into arguments? Because I felt like I was listening to the show as you guys just made it, the game of first bite sound. You realize very quickly way toast is going to win.
There's not going to be second place because Apple's not going to feel as good as toast. And then you just pivoted into, well, delicious foods. This is my wheelhouse. Has everyone gained weight during the pandemic? I sure have. And then you started yammering about how difficult it is to eat cereal while you're watching television. So I'm just. Is this the merging of your world, your career path in a pandemic and food? You're like, yes, I've got something to talk about today.
I mean, this is like improv.
I hear things come at me and that's how we react. And Mike called. Steve got fat. I say we're all fat. Billy took a bite at toast. I hear the sound. I'm like, what's the best food sound? I'm just like it just it goes in it goes into my brain and my brain cooks it up and then it comes out my mouth.
But which game or we play because I like games. Yeah, I don't know. The game that we're playing might not be playing games in the NBA. If there's a boycott we'll get to that in a minute. But this is slightly more important at the moment.
Before we get to any of that, who threw the no hitter? I've been watching get up and first take for like an hour and a half and I haven't seen any mention of it. Well, I'm hoping we don't get to any mention of Messi, because I heard you talking about Suarez and Messi before the show.
And if I don't hear another syllable of that the rest of my life, I will die happy because he something when you do that whole bully about soccer thing and you cut your ear to, I guess, the establishment white man from the nineteen nineties, are you proud of yourself? This is the biggest sports story in the world. I'm not objecting to the actual story. I didn't know my bad. No, I'll shut up about the biggest star in the world switching teams.
My bad. I apologize to all of you, including you Dan who took serious offense.
I well I just want to point out to the audience that it's not soccer that's annoying me.
It's you like it's your way of asking your specific way of discussing soccer.
It didn't seem like a legit apology, but to be honest, I was I don't forgive you. I was having a real conversation about soccer, not this On-Air thing, defending the merits. I was talking to someone who was also interested. And you were eavesdropping rude of you, by the way, to bring that on.
You you I was eavesdropping, but to in my meager defense, I only started eavesdropping because the guy said, oh, welcome back, cocaine. Mike, because of how fast you were talking about the things you are passionate about.
Shut up. I'm glad you made Mike Francesa proud today with your very original take.
Again, I want to tell the audience and all you soccer zealots out there, this is not not soccer zealots.
Stop referring to us is that you're going to shut up. We just like the sport. What is your problem? And I call them cocaine. Mike in private.
I mean, yes. Welcome back to cocaine. Mike, I was not objecting in any way to soccer or a huge story, a huge international story. I was simply objecting to the way that you discuss it. But getting back. To what we were discussing, we'll get an update from Billy soon on the status no hitter. Did we decide that toast is the best sound that food makes, period, upon first bite? Has it been concluded?
I would say it's Towcester or nachos, right? Nacho's first bite. Pretty good eye.
But again, I think you're mixing it up with taste. Just the sound. The sound like my nachos. Load it up, as you can imagine, with sour cream and avocado and cheese and beans, you don't even hear the crunch because everything is soft. So the river gets to the ship and there is no sound.
So then what are we doing if we're not playing that game?
Are we playing the best first bite of something that's enormously delicious because is a totally different game that got is playing sizzling on sizzling the cooking of bacon. Yes, that's wonderful. I think we can all agree the smell and scent of the cooking and sound of the cooking of bacon is wonderful to everybody but vegans.
I haven't taken my eyes off of the bottom line and I just found out about the no hitter that was thrown last night. That's all it got. All right.
Give us a minute on the saddest no hitter ever thrown.
Well, it was thrown by Lucas Giolito of the Chicago White Sox and he had 13 strikeouts, which is very impressive. But he did it in front of a bunch of cardboard people. So no one got to experience and enjoy this except cardboard people who did. I don't know if, you know, are not real people. So this guy's been working his entire career to have the highlight of his career be performed in front of cardboard people. There's no one there cheering for him.
Didn't he come out before the game and, like, waved to them and interact with the cardboard people? Isn't that something that he did before the game because it was going to give him a shot? I saw him actually come out and sort of not shake hands because we're not even doing that with cardboard people. But he waved to a group of cardboard people in the stands as as he was coming off the field are coming onto the field.
If you're a cardboard person who's in the stands for a no hitter, does that count as you being there for a no hitter like a Bob Costas was there as a cardboard person? Did he finally get to see a no hitter?
Well, I don't know if you know this, but cardboard people aren't real people. I don't know if you know that. But you pointed out to me just earlier that you didn't know if I knew that. So I didn't know if you knew that.
No, I know that. I'm just saying, if you're a cardboard person, is there do you get credit for witnessing the no hitter? No.
Was the answer. Is there going to be a secondary market for the cardboard people that were in attendance? I don't know. Would sell them? That's a good question. Sampson would sell. Here's the sad thing about this, Mike, he had one walk, could have been a perfect game. The guy he walked, that was his first walk of the season. He's the most undisciplined hitter they have. And he walked them on four pitches. Look at that.
No hitter said no hitter breakdown.
Also possible, you know, a nacho what got lodged in a possible boycott in the NBA?
An entire fishbone came out of your mouth.
A possible boycott in the NBA next. At our show on Twitter, put a couple of these on the pole, please, Guillermo at Libertador Show Better Sound. In the food and beverage category, bacon sizzling or a nice pour of Coca-Cola into a frosty cold mug, also put on the pole, better first bite toast or the sound of the first bite of a Taco Bell hard shell at two a.m..
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So here's the deal. Mike Ryan, can you get that sound? It's longer sound, but I want everyone to hear it and absorb it because there's something going on in the NBA bubble that is interesting. Those guys were worried that symbolically, once they ended up in the bubble, they would be cut off from the rest of the world in a way that wouldn't allow them to impact the rest of what is happening in America. And so that conversation as the screaming in the streets died down, I've been made a little bit sad, even as we've returned a little bit more to normalcy, seeing these giant crowds of protesters on the weekend dwindle down to six and five and four people by themselves going down the street wanting to hold on to the pieces of the movement that were in the street when they all had our attention.
But with sports coming back and the NBA guys figured this with sports coming back, it's really easy to get distracted right up until a video goes viral and everyone gets horrified because it's just as bad as George Floyd watching a guy shot in the back several times. You know, Jacob Blake is something that the NBA has rallied around.
They didn't Kyrie Irving bring this up before the players went to the bubble and was pretty much left that people mocked him about an unreliable source and he's all over the place.
And if you talk to people who were on that call, there was all sorts of weirdness outside that he was not the best voice for the idea of maybe we shouldn't be playing, given that he wasn't going to be playing anyway. But now the Toronto Raptors Nick nurse is saying or actually talking about boycotting games and now this becomes an interesting ones to got because. The NFL has shown us again and again in the weakest possible way with a commissioner who all of a sudden is doing the apology tour.
That doesn't mean a whole lot because it's such a reversal, of course, from where he had the power to where he is now that you don't get to be anything but a follower and a listener on this. But the NBA leads the NBA on the civil rights movement of our time. This is the civil rights movement of this generation. The NBA actually does things with a commissioner that pays attention to his employers employees, unlike Goodell, who said he just failed to listen to Kaepernick for four years and he has regrets about not listening.
Silver listens, Nick nurse listens, the coaches in that sport. Listen, what you see in that sport where the coaches rally around their players is not something you saw in the NFL when not even in the Steelers locker room could be united on. How do we stay in the locker room? Do we let our military guys stand outside? Whether it's Tomlin, do he's got to follow? Because that sport followers, because the owners, Jerry Jones, is still out here, still got I don't know, let's compromise on the flag.
He came out, Jerry Jones, who didn't say anything. Well, Goodell was out there saying, hey, I'm so sorry, Colin Kaepernick. Jerry Jones, who was in hiding, who loves a microphone, now comes out. Hey, can we barter on this? Yeah, we bought on the flag. How about how about you guys stand for the flag. Me beforehand. He finally got to a microphone. And what is he doing the same crap.
Yeah. Because he's already said publicly, he's already said it out loud. None of my cowboys will kneel in this state, in this sport. And now he's stuck on that one because his players are going to kneel if they get out there. And he's still applying that pressure. But easier to have a unified message and to go forward. When you have someone at the very top, as you pointed out it, Adam Silver, who listens to his players, it's easy for the coaches, the players and everyone else to fall in line behind that guy because he leads darn well.
He is leading, but he's also leading democratically because you've got LeBron James actually doing systemic things with voting, pouring money into voting so that there can be change in some of these systems that, you know, depending on where you stand. We've talked about this before where, you know, if you don't think the system works, you don't know anything about the history of how the system was built. The system works as it's intended. It was meant to hold down black people.
Like that's not up for question, like the roots of law enforcement in this country. Go back to that. That's not a it's not a subjective statement I'm making. It's America's history. Our law enforcement has always subjugated minorities at a disproportionate rate. It was built to do so. So when you have mass incarceration or where you have black and brown people being killed at a disproportionate rate, that's by design. It's not the system not working, it's the system working the way our founding fathers intended it to work back when we had slavery.
So with all of that as subtext, we will play for you in the next segment. Doc Rivers basically crystallizing all of this as the NBA players wonder whether or not to boycott. This is not a small things do not, because boycotting is the thing. They got this right in the NBA. They got it up and running. It would be a blow to TNT and ESPN and sports in general if NBA guys decide, you know what, not playing, that's how wrong this is.
We will not live in your bubble because the rest of us and they've got it on their social justice uniforms, us, us. Jimmy Butler saying, I'm not wanting to put something back there because I'm just another black man that could have happened to me. I could have been shot in the back seven times in front of my loved ones for no other reason other than being me and being black. And so I want to play this Doc Rivers sound for you because it'll break your heart hearing his heart broken.
We'll get to that next. The dad, Levator Jones, brought to you by Shell v Power Nitro, plus premium gasoline, all gas to the Dan Labrada Joe appear via the Shell benzyl performance. Lot apologies, Christine.
I interrupted you.
And finally, a Detroit woman was found unresponsive and pronounced dead after paramedics performed CPR and other life saving methods for 30 minutes. Hours later, after her body had been transported, the staff at the James Coal Funeral Home realized the woman was still breathing. Oh, wow.
OK, a dark one. We gave Christina a little bit of a dark one there. I am hoping that wherever it is that this all ends with the show, with Christine, it just ends up with us contaminating her so much since she's already making fat jokes, fat jokes after a week that she's basically just cursing us out on air where we have to bleep her out. Thank you, Christine. Appreciate it.
Just three mistakes so far. And just under a week and a half, congratulations. Rescinded one.
I did two a little stumble right there.
I was about to tack on a third.
There was Mike settling down right before it. Well, because look at what she was reading. She I like you. I like you. She absorbs the things she's reading and she's like, wait a minute, I'm headed to a funeral home now. Is this going to get funny at any point? I'm counting it three. OK, all right. Two and a half to thank you, Christine. We appreciate it. So let's get back here to this Doc Rivers sound because and this is a bit conflicting for me, and I'm going to sound here because there are parts of this.
That represent conflict of interest for everyone at ESPN, we need sports to exist, we need them to survive. People are going to get fired here if sports disappears. So I am not here actively rooting for the NBA to go away with boycott. But if I were advising them. I would tell them to do it if I were if I were advising the players, yes, take a couple of games away from the people and force the Milwaukee Bucks to force people to pay attention to what is happening in Wisconsin, you can pause the money making in the cash register for a little while.
If I was advising them, even though it runs against our interests here and my personal interests, I would advise them to go ahead and send the message of leading on this one by costing us games.
This most recent incident happened close to Milwaukee in Wisconsin. Can you imagine Yanase the Bucks, you know, desperately want to win a championship. And if Giannis came out and said it's not that important all eventually win one. Hey owner go make change. Go help instigate change in our city and owners help instigate change across the country.
I don't think, I don't think they're talking about boycotting the rest of the season though. I think they're just talking about boycotting games. And I think that that allowed that is the compromise within all of this, that you can foul up the NBA schedule and you can inconvenience America with a couple of games lost without costing your family the paychecks that it might need, without costing yourself all of the money where you have to make a decision, because that's you know, Kaepernick was forced to make a decision between his career.
Right. And his message. And this is the message being brought outside the bubble by the people who are wearing on their uniforms as they cash in to God, because for all. The stuff that LeBron James has done as a legitimate sports activist, becoming an adult when he applies the ego of I don't bend for nobody, that's what he says. But the money made him compromise on China. He gives you the ego of I don't bend for nobody.
But no, you're bent on China. You can't make change like this unless it's with money, unless it costs money. That's how you change this. And if you cost the NBA and ESPN and us and everybody some money and some discomfort, you've got our attention. Because what happened was the corporations all shifted over those months when there were no distractions. And then we all got right back to business. You saw it everywhere. And so if they want to get your attention again, it's not enough to use the platform the way Doc Rivers is here.
If I'm advising them, it's not enough to just simply let us hear about your pain. Doc, you got to lead now. It's not just about here in the crack in your voice.
You got to lead in a way that gets America's attention, which stands out to me is just just watching the Republican convention and this this feeling, this fear. Right. Like all you hear Donald Trump and all of them talking about fear. We're the ones getting killed. We're the ones getting shot. We're the ones that we're denied to live in certain communities. We've been home. We've been shot in. All you do is keep your fear. It's.
It's amazing. Why do you keep loving this country and this country does not love this back? It's just it's really so sad, like I should just be a coach. And it's so often reminded of my color. You know, it's just really sad we've got to do better, but we got to demand better like we got you. It's funny, we protest and they send riot guards, right? They send people in riot outfits. They go to Michigan with guns and they're spitting on cops and nothing happens.
The training has to change in the police force. The unions have to be taken down in the police force. My dad was a cop. I believe in good cops. We're not trying to defund the police and take all their money away. We're trying to get them to protect us. Just like they protect everybody else. I didn't want to talk about it before the game because it's so hard, like just keep watching that video. If you watch that video, you don't need to be black to be outraged.
You don't that you need to be American and outrage and how the Republicans talk about fear, we're the ones that need to be scared. We're the ones having to talk every to every black child. What white father has to give his son to talk about being careful if you get pulled over? It's just ridiculous. And it just keeps getting it keeps going. Oh, there's no charges, Brianna Taylor. No charges. Nothing. All we're asking is you live up to the Constitution.
That's all we're asking for. Everybody. For everyone. Mike Ryan Stewarts has been saying for a couple of days now because he's jealous that I write essays for television soaked in HBO Real Sports and Tom Rinaldi, he has said that he's going to write a message and he had the perfect opportunity yesterday to write a message about Lionel Messi, who was in the news because he's transferring. It's it's a monster move, right? It's it's Michael Jordan switching teams or Michael Jordan because it's even bigger than Peyton Manning becoming a free agent.
And I was following him with helicopters. Messi changing teams in his early 30s would be like Michael Jordan doing OK. I was going to say Tom Brady when he did it in his 40s.
So extremely rare in soccer because the top line elite athletes, you're usually picking your landing spot if you're forcing a transfer out of a handful of teams and you try to decide, OK, what can I get the most money out of this? Like three teams that can afford the transfer fee. This is reportedly a free transfer. You had an exit clause now Barson mess. You're fighting over that because the language for him to exercise this clause said June. But he's like the season that in essence, an offseason clause and there's a pandemic.
So there might be a fight over that. But Messi has his pick of the litter and you could justify paying him crazy wages because you're not spending millions upon millions for a transfer fee. It's it's pretty unprecedented for a player like him. All right.
But it will still be a big story tomorrow, correct? Like, that's that's going to carry a couple of days. But this is going to take a stab at writing a message today. This afternoon. You're not you know, he threw out the idea. I mean, it was a great name for it, right? He's just hoping someone else does it for him. Well, you will. And we'll see if you get it done this afternoon.
I will deliver it tomorrow morning. I love that.
Let's do the normal thing. OK, you go rough draft show, like the slightest bit of effort. OK, now come in.
That's all it takes for my guy show. I'm just a little effort, a little pen to paper, but and Mike fills in the gaps. We've been doing it for twenty years around here. It's like the whole, the whole thing is constructed to do that for you. How do you think your profound laziness has been rewarded? I'm a guy who just likes to get the ball rolling. Did you know you don't want me to roll the ball out for you?
What happened with the Sucrets personal record book? I just wanted to buy in from you that it was you. You want your thoughts to get your you want your thoughts to immediately result in direct deposit. That's how you involve us.
I'm an idea guy. I throw ideas out there. They're for the group. And if someone would like to execute, put a business plan together, I would take it to the next step, not for the group there for you. It's to enhance your lazy character into not doing anything but looking good and looking like he's doing something.
I throw it out there, it's chum in the water. If someone wants to bring me a business plan, I'll cut it out and bring it to an investor.
Well, throw just throw out a draft and we'll massage it and it'll be great. It'll be your voice. You'll get praise. Just do something just.
That's it. Just just fart out a seed and we will fertilize it. This is how we've been doing it for twenty years. I don't understand why you're just noticing this now.
Bold prediction. Nothing comes of this now.
We're going to have a say tomorrow. Well, wait a minute. It's funny that you should say that, Mike, because when's the last time that I met him? Something that was fully under his control and I ended up winning the bet anyway. Was it the color of his car? Color of his car? Oh, that you have the total control. And I bet you one hundred dollars. He said you wouldn't do it because your wife didn't want you to do it and you couldn't do it.
You got the other car. What's the bet right now. I bet one hundred dollars that there will be a goat. Ate my computer excuse tomorrow and you will not get the seeds of anything on MSA.
I mean I just laid the groundwork for him to send me just two sentences. What is the bet?
No, it's got to be more than that for me. Like, you got to give me more than that. Not something he can dictate into his phone on the way home.
Let's have you got to decide what's fair. I think one sentence is actually no joke. Two paragraphs.
I will give you a lot less a paragraph. I mean, is that two sentences? Is it six? Is it four?
I mean, you're asking for you gotta write a minimum of ten sentences for MSA no matter how much is misspelled in it. OK, no matter how lazy it is. Yes. Billy, what do you have for us here?
It doesn't know. Ten sentences worth of messy anything though. Like what is he going to say about messy. Had ten sentences. Know what? He's OK. Got it.
Sentences do not count like weekend observations where it's like Lionel Messi. Mike, write a joke here for me.
Right. Well, let's get the ball rolling.
I mean, that said, Billy just wrote a sentence for a that reminded of how many teams as he bid on Messi.
Yes, Messi signed with Barcelona when he was a young boy. So he's this is a huge deal. This is a tragic. Day four, this is Babe Ruth leaving the Yankees. OK, so this is bigger than that because Babe Ruth was Babe Ruth. Like, that's a hypothetical scenario. This is this is unprecedented for a player of that elite talent to have his pick of the litter. It's massive. So much so that I still don't believe it's actually happening.
Greenwall tweeted out that he still thinks the most likely landing spot is still Barcelona, that there's going to be some sort of makeup. Did you see what happened? The new manager like so NFL style, the days of yore privilege are over. Messy, messy faxes and I'm out.
Well, let me fax that in. You have to fax. I was like, who still uses fax? But it's like legally you have to fax.
You're bound by it. So it can't be a computer signature, an email. Like legally, there are certain documents that have to be faxed in. I did not know that.
I did not know that in 2020, Messi had to actually send a fax. He had to go find a fax machine. It could not be a DocuSign situation.
What I wanted to ask is this because I was told that on a call a couple of weeks ago in Miami, which had a disastrous start in every respect, not just pandemic, everything has been disastrous. Soccer should work in this market. Soccer has been trying to work in this market for a long time. We are an international market. If you were to get messy, it would be an enormous, enormous thing that would immediately, because this town is all about the shiny, sparkling things, make soccer matter in this city in a way that it never has.
If you were to get messy, they are targeting him. However, I feel like that's everyone in the league in the NBA saying they're targeting Yanase like, yes, of course everyone is targeting Giannis, but before this even became news Inter Miami was targeting having a conversation about targeting Messi.
They've made no secret about that. Messi was even a part of their introductory video and Messi is sort of publicly flirted with this idea. Beckham and Messi to Adidas are sort of like LeBron and Michael Jordan and Adidas has an entire contract with MLS. Messi is not coming to MLS unless Adidas does something wild and now it's all funny. Money and bleeding into who's actually paying Messi. Messi, the MLS is a realistic thing in Miami is a realistic thing. And a couple of years, as most teams ever won anything.
I'm sorry. I'm asking you seriously, because I'm trying to control the message. I think he has three Champions League trophies. I won the World Cup, though.
He made it to a final famously.
And Strogatz has been writing things down this entire segment. I feel like he this is the most effort he's going to pour into the mess right here. He's written like five or six notes down and he just interviewed you instead of checking the Internet on what Messi has done while on the air. We're doing the radio show. We need the content. It's a seismic sports move. Stuart's doing his research in segment by just listening to Mike.