My Wife Is Grief-Spending After a Miscarriage (Hour 2)
The Dave Ramsey Show- 1,104 views
- 23 Jul 2020
Relationships, Education, Debt, Career, Home Selling, Insurance As heard on this episode: Splash Financial: http://bit.ly/2XAdOIf Churchill Mortgage: http://bit.ly/2JcfkGy Sign Up for a FREE trial of Ramsey Plus TODAY: https://bit.ly/31ricKt Tools to get you started: Debt Calculator: http://bit.ly/2QIoSPV Insurance Coverage Checkup: http://bit.ly/2BrqEuo Complete Guide to Budgeting: http://bit.ly/2QEyonc Interview Guide: http://bit.ly/2BuGnZE Check out other podcasts in the Ramsey Network: http://bit.ly/2JgzaQR
The headquarters of Ramsey Solutions broadcasting from the car rental studios. It's the Dave Ramsey Show where Danny's dumb cash is king and a paid off home mortgage has taken the place of the BMW as the status symbol of choice. I'm Dave Ramsey, your host. Dr. John Deloney Ramsey personality is my co-host on the air today. Open phones, a triple eight eight two five five two two five. That's triple eight eight to five five two to five.
Jordan starts us off in Pittsburgh. Hey, Jordan, welcome to the Dave Ramsey Show.
Hi. Yeah, thank you so much for having me on. Sure. How can we help? Yeah, I'm just going to jump right into a little story and ask a question concerning that story. So recently, my wife and I, we actually suffered a miscarriage of our twin babies around 14 weeks pregnant currently. Yeah, we have. Oh, thank you. Currently, we have a two year old at home as well as a dog. And my wife, she actually wants another puppy, golden retriever.
And her birthday is coming up soon. I'm trying to get her to say no, because in the wake of all the grief and sorrow, my concern would be the cost, because she is a vet tech and trained our dog really well. She recently took a course through the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter day Saints, a financial course that I listened to your show as I drive for Uber. So we both understand the importance of eliminating debt as soon as possible.
So my question is, you know, I love my wife very much. I find extremely hard to say no to a dog after all that has happened, especially on her birthday. But financially speaking, how does someone appropriately respond in wake of a devastating event like a miscarriage? I think there's two approaches to that I've I've sat in your exact seat and in all honesty, full disclosure, I handled it pretty poorly. And so I'm going to speak to you from somebody who did that the wrong way.
And then I'd love to hear what you have to say, Dave.
I, I think first and foremost, you've got to recognize in a real immediate right now kind of way and in a deep and profound way that you two are going to grieve this differently. And there's not a right and wrong way to grieve it. There's just a wrong way to approach it, which is that you and or her.
But usually it's the guy decides that his way of grieving is best. And so it's time to move on. And let's get there. Let's get there quickly. And so honoring her and her grief system, number two, you're going to need to she's going need to get somebody in her life that is a mentor of some shape, form or fashion.
That kid has been there that can listen, that can talk with her and not let her be alone in this situation.
I think telling somebody, well, my recommendation is always nobody make any long term decisions like buying a dog or buying a car or buying a house for six months to a year after you have some sort of loss. That was the advice I got from my counselor at the time, and that's the advice I've continued to give to folks over the years. I know that can be hard as a husband. That's usually a conversation that somebody that's usually a response to somebody feeling disconnected.
And so what I'd recommend you to do is go find somebody you can talk to together and talk about loss and loneliness.
And sometimes that takes the air out of the need to go, spend, go buy, go replace.
That's just a grieving moment that is all messed up and disconnection. Have you sat down and talked to somebody with her? Have you all talked to somebody?
We both have a really strong support system, but we haven't talked to somebody specifically together. We've talked about it a lot in that sense. And counseling that's of thing or Pittsburgh that they did for her was a follow up appointment with the counselor.
So I recommend you all go together and have somebody have a neutral third party that's sitting there with you that you can talk about what his coping behavior look like and what is tomorrow look like and what he's trying to punt the pain down the road, which is we're buying a dog is and really give you all some strategies and tools right now to sit in it together.
So you're hearing loud and clear, Jordan, but not buying the dog is not about money. But it's about it's about it's a it's a coping mechanism and it allows you to not deal with what you need to go deal with or what Dr. John is saying. OK, so the two of you sit down with somebody and you should make a decision to do long term things like buy a dog like children like.
Buying a house or a big investment or something from a point of emotional health and strength, and when you guys are when anyone's been through what you guys have been through, you're not you're not strong right now. And just say that out loud and say, because I'm not strong, I'm not making big decisions right now. And if you can get her to say that with you, then the dog thing goes away. But it's not because Dave Ramsey said, no, you need to get out of debt, not buy a dog.
You know, your feelings be damned. I mean, that's not that's not the discussion that we're having here.
And so although I will tell you that possibly the best dog on the planet is the golden retriever, I'm going to strongly disagree.
I like the basset hound, but not and I think it's also important for guys out there to say out loud, basset hound, I love me, a basset hound man.
I love basset hound.
I took me a minute to get that one. I couldn't even get the picture.
They just look like God had some miscellaneous parts left over and they stuck together was like with this, let's let this one go.
Yeah, they're the most stubborn, obnoxious. I told you that the lovely dogs dog is loving and kind. Yeah.
I don't need we don't need that kind of love. I need some eyes and just loves you when you when you're, you know, the right kind of dog.
Now I just you probably basset hounds man. You never saw. I never saw that one coming get one day I would a guest pug or something but I would have seen basset hound coming.
All right. Open votes this hour. Talk to John Delaney, my co-host and crime here. They're open phones, triple eight eight to five five two two five. Media is up next. And let's see, media is in Riverside. Eimear, welcome to The Dave Ramsey Show. Hello.
Thank you for taking my call. I have a question. I am currently in school to get my show. I'm almost done. I'm worried about transferring and paying for it because currently I'm in sixteen thousand in debt for credit cards and a car loan and I'm working minimum wage and I'm just nervous about what I can do for how much it's going to cost me and how you transfer.
What what are you transferring? Right now, I'm at a community college. Oh, you're going to go and finish up your other two years at a. Is that what you're saying? Yeah, at a four year. OK, so I'm just nervous about when I'm possibly done by the beginning of next year, around this time, there should be time for me to transfer and I'll be gone to that process. But I'm just worried about having to take out loans because I know you don't have to do.
You need a different job. You. Minimum wage. Minimum wage will not cut it. You need a better job and you need to get on the horn right now, a year in advance, schools are going to offer you transfer scholarships. Schools are going to be desperate for students that have your credentials and your success track record in the coming months. Yes, work hard and you'll be able to you'll be able to figure it out. Yeah. I mean, get a job cleaning houses.
You can make twenty five dollars an hour, change your job. Don't take out a loan. Don't take out a loan. Hold on. I'm going to send you a copy of Anthony O'Neill's book, Debt Free Degree. Do you have student loans? I need you to tune in right now and listen, I've been telling you to refinance your loans with Splash Financial. Here's what I don't understand. Many of you who have been prequalified to refinance your student loans to better rates have not finished your dadgum applications.
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Dr. John Boloney, Ramsey personality, my co-host on the air today here on the Dave Ramsey Show, Open phones, a triple eight eight to five five two two five.
Aaron is with us from San Antonio, visiting here in the lobby at Ramsey Solutions with a question. Hi, Aaron. How are you doing?
Well, and you, Dave? Better than I deserve. Sir, how can Dr. John and I help?
Long story short, about two years ago, I was a CDL driver and lost my CDL to a bad truck wreck. I went from 55000 a year to about 15000 a year, currently studying for my real estate exam license. Good. And I'm just wondering how to stick out in the job market interviews and everything being mostly blue collar, going to a white collar. Hmm.
That's a fantastic question. Yeah, I do. So what's your how long have you been out in your circle and back you up from 55 to 15000. And now you're you're studying for your exams. Yes. Yes, sir. What's the tell me the gap there. How long.
Currently I've been out for two and a half years. I was on unemployment, you know, just doing rehab, getting back into, you know, everything up. So.
So you were injured then? Yes. OK, yes. I'm sorry.
Well, real estate, there's not a lot of interviewing until you actually, you know, you talk a broker into letting you park your license there. The interviewing is every time you talk to somebody about buying a house or selling a house, you're interviewing every day for the rest of your life.
You know, you're selling and they want to buy you as the person who sells their home for them or you as the person who helps them find a home.
And so, you know, it's a good way to look at that kind of thing. It's just a kind of reverse it and say, who wouldn't?
Me and my wife use what kind of guy, you know, are we going to use. And, you know, I'm looking for someone that I believe can sell the house. Right. All right. And I believe can help me find a house. And so you've got to have the confidence that you can do that. You may plug into a training program at a broker broker, might have a training program for new agents that are coming on and start to learn some of the basic things.
I sold my first home three weeks after I turned 18 years old, passed my license week after I turned 18, and I sold my first home to a high school buddy of mine and which is proof that he was not smart to pull out an eighteen year old kid selling my house. But when I talked him into it and still got a copy of that commission check from way back there.
So it's a wonderful business to get into, but it's a people business.
And, you know, and it's not necessarily a white collar, blue collar thing as much as it is a people thing.
OK, and so you got to enjoy people and there's a lot of drama when you're buying a house or selling house.
Buying a house is very stressful and and exciting. It it's a dream and then it's a nightmare. And then it's didn't close on time. And then and there's all this stuff back and forth. And so working with people through all of that, you're going to become a student of human nature.
Erin, I don't want to read too much into this because I know you're you're on national radio now and it's nervous. And there's a there's a lobby full of people watching you. Have you fully looked in the mirror yet since your back and said, I'm ready to rock and roll?
There's something about you that I'm looking through this glass right now that says I'm a little bit nervous, I'm a little bit lacking in this confidence, that says I can walk in and look them in the eye and say, I'm going to take care of you and your family.
I would say, yeah, it does make me nervous. You know, I'm thirty three years old. I've had a lot of different jobs. And, you know, I did the Navy, I did heating and air conditioning, you know, the CDL. So I feel, you know, I've done fast food. So I feel like, you know, I've switched a lot in 33 years. I've never really known what what I liked currently. Right now I'm working at a nursery and the happiest that I'm there is when I am helping people.
Yeah. So when I'm sitting there, you know, planning out what to do for the yard, teaching them about products, you know, what's going to last during the summer, what's been the last and the winter. I really like that teaching process. It just not paying. So I like the teaching aspect.
You just rattled off a list of jobs that, as you mentioned, serves other people, you know, how to figure stuff out and actually do a thing you I do for a living. I sit on a radio and talk to people. You can go fix somebody's air conditioner, dude, that's a skill. And so I don't want you to get in this. There's a blue collar to white collar. There's a series of there's a confidence. There's a I belong to sit at a table.
Someone's hired me to find them a home for them in their. And I can do that because I'm a good teacher, you had to learn how to do all the values, you had to learn how to drive the truck, you had to learn how to do the other things. That's what you're saying.
Absolutely. And you can do stuff. Yeah.
And I think you do this, you'll be able to do this, you know. But here's what sometimes. People feel different, like like blue collar, like works hard and white collar doesn't if you're going to win the real estate business, you're going to hustle and grind just like you did, though, that just like, you know, you're shifting gears, going over the mountain, the different thing, but the same thing.
There's still a mental discipline that says, I'm going to lean in, I'm a push, more push, push, and we'll get this done.
And not only am I going to learn it, but then I'm going to hustle and we'll grind.
And what I sense from you is just a real sweet spirit and just you're a likable guy. And I think you working with first time homebuyers, helping them get in a home, they're scared to death and you can give them some confidence and gently, kindly walk them through rather than slamming them around, you know, like some of these agents do. I think you're going to do great.
I don't want you to believe in you as much as Dave and I do. Yeah. It's just a look at that smile.
That's what I'm talking about right there. That's what I'm talking about. I want you to do believe in yourself as much as we do it, man. You're going to be able to hold somebody's hand through a nightmare process and be such a gift to them.
When you get the other side and you look back, you're going to go. There's not that much difference between blue collar, white collar. OK, just in one, I'm using my brain and I'm hustling. I'm grinding and I'm, you know, run a calculator. And the other one, I'm actually turning a wrench.
I've done both myself as I myself. And both can be exhausting, by the way. And both are like real work. It's just a different process in a different way that you come home tired. Hey, man, thanks for coming by. Thank you. I it blessed open phones at eight eight two five five two two five. Greg is in Syracuse. Hi Greg.
Welcome to the Dave Ramsey Show. Hey, how's it going?
Better than I deserve. How can we help? You know, it's another sad show, I guess, but so my father passed away about until I come.
Oh, man, I'm so sorry.
Yeah, no, it was a month long process, so we were kind of prepared for. And so when we'd done the grieving kind of prior and still seeing a little bit. But I'm calling is he was very soft financially. Obviously there's my sister myself, other the receiving benefits of that and kind been talking to a couple of different financial planners, but he's like on your show is so I have a mortgage on the house and a lot of that, honestly, with the inheritance, I'd rather just pay off my mortgage, not have to worry about paying off my house at all, ever, and then take care of some car loans and some other stuff that I got.
And there still will be, you know, some left over for savings or we're not saving for Bush or investments. But that's just kind of, you know, some financial player, the same as you just said. It all started mutual funds. I'm like, well, I'm still paying. I just got the mortgage on our house in November. So it's a very young mortgage. So. So let me help you in your second, OK?
Financial planners are not there to tell you what to do. And he found one that is trying to do that, so you need to fire them. Yes. Yesterday they're there to teach you well and let you make decisions after they have taught you. You already know what to do with this money. And it's your money, by the way. And so that's what I would do with it.
And I don't want you to jump. I know that you had a month to plan for your dad's passing, you know, and it feels like you've grieved it.
You've done all of the things. You had the conversations. But there is some finality. You're right. And you've experienced that. I don't want you to pass over that or fly by that. I want you to honor your old man. And I especially want you to honor your response.
Let me ask you this to that. If you paid off all your bills and then you were responsible in a budget going forward that make your dad smile. I think what I think he would want to find a guy that's the kind of guy he was, right? Yes. Yes. I think you would want us to use the money wisely and not just blow it. Yeah, but I mean, he wouldn't be mad about you paying off your house right now, OK?
And that answers your question to fire your financial planner. This is the Dave Ramsey Show. During these crazy times, the best advice I can give you is control the controllable. Let's start looking at major expenses like your monthly rent or your house payment.
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My co-host today on The Dave Ramsey Show, Dr. John Aloni Ramsey, personality on the debt free stage right here at Ramsey Solutions. Sarah and Pedro are with us. Hey, guys. How are you? Hi. We're good. I'm great. Good to have you guys. And where do you live? Hanford, California. Awesome.
Welcome to Nashville and all the way here to do a debt free scream. Yeah, we had to. I love it. How much you paid off?
62000 and 43 dollars. Good for you. And how long did this take? About 12 months. Good for you and your range of income.
We went from 150000 to one 17000.
Excellent. What do you guys do for a living? I work for local government and I work for a quality management for correctional health care. Very cool. Very cool.
What kind of debt was a 62 grand? It was credit cards, a mattress purchase. We had to get a king sized bed. Better little daughter sleeps in it just for her.
She just like overtakes our bed and our van. And then the big one was student loans.
Oh, how much student loans? About 38 or 39000.
OK, so almost 40 of the 62 then. Yeah. Wow. Good for you guys. So your normal, your dad on everything.
Even the mattress. Yeah. You open the mattress. So what in the world what happened 12 months ago? What blew you up and changed your direction?
Well, we have five children. And after we were blessed with our fifth child, you know, we were living in a 3500 square foot home. So we used to joke around that you can't swing a kid without hitting a kid around here. Right.
So we could afford to move to a bigger home.
And we did. And we just felt we we made enough money to not have to live check to check with the increased mortgage rate with our new home, we went to a five bedroom home that was much larger, not just the increased mortgage, but I mean with another baby.
It's like more daycare or kid expenses and stuff like that.
And so we purchased we moved in our home in January. And the following month we were in financial peace university just like that. Yeah. How'd you hear about it?
Through our credit union, actually, our credit union, the the manager puts on a she puts on a few class twice a year, so. Yeah. Very cool. Very cool.
So you go to the financial piece class the first night. What happened?
Well, actually, we took our oldest daughters with us because we were told, like, just bring the family with you and it'll be a good step after that. First Class Pedro and I just sat down and we like looked at all of our debt. We started looking up our online accounts and then we realized we never really realized before how much we were in debt.
Mm. Never really thought about it and never was truthful to ourselves about how much we owed.
We were normal. We could afford to pay our bills every month and it was just sort of accepted. That's the way it was going to be. We're just going to pay these bills every month and that's that's how life will be.
And I just figured I'm just going to be paying my student loan into my 50s. And I thought, like, oh, that's just fine. That's normal, you know.
But I did it all up at 62000. Did you pass out?
Oh, it was jarring. Yeah, it was jarring. We didn't realize how much we actually were in debt.
Yeah. I remember that first day in the financial piece when they have all the testimonies from other people. I remember thinking it's impossible. How did these people do it? And, you know, twelve months later, here we are. We did it. Wow.
So proud of you guys. What do you know. He wrote thank you. Excellent job.
How's it feel to not have any payments but the house payment? It is. It's fun. Yeah. It's really it's such a so we became debt free in February, a few weeks later, coronavirus and shuts down. We don't really feel like we were affected too much because we were already used to not going out.
We're not going to movies have to be going out to change. So it wasn't really that much of a difference. You probably piled up some money since February. So like we didn't realize we were already living that quarantine lifestyle is kept swinging. The kids are out of school.
So. So, yeah, but it is it's just really fun. Nice to know that every dollar that we bring in for income other than our monthly bills like utilities and groceries and things like that, that's ours to keep and save and do whatever we want to with it. So it's liberating in that knapsack you're building, not digging, right?
Yeah. That's so great. Makes a lot of difference. Well, congratulations you.
Yeah. So what do you tell people now that are that are just now having their wake up call. They're listening and they went I just ended up on my bed last night I.
Oh, my God. So what's the secret to getting out of debt? It is budgeting, budgeting and the budget and following the plan, your plan, the baby step plan. Exactly. We had a lot of money in our savings account before, like almost 22000 in our savings. And baby step one is to have only a thousand dollars in your savings account. So that's why we're able to pay off so much so quickly because we had that big leap forward now.
We had that discussion like, are we really going to do this? And I remember thinking that's what he said to do. So that's that's what we do.
And I remember walking into the credit union and write a check for the rest of our vehicle. I remember calling the different credit cards and they don't make it easy to close them either at all.
They don't. Yeah, it took some work to find the right place and to actually get them close. But I remember calling them all. And, you know, in the matter of a couple of days, we spent 21000 dollars in debt. Wow.
Yeah, but you saw some instant progress. Instant. Yeah. You're like out of the blocks fast. Yeah. Yeah.
And another thing I wanted to mention was that so we have five kids, our oldest is 14, soon to be 15. They're 14, 12, seven four four two.
Sorry. It's cool. I'll leave that one out.
And before this, we never really thought about we knew we would want to help the kids go to college if they wanted to. And we never really had a plan for it. We always just figured we'll cross that bridge when we get there. But with this baby step plan, we actually have like a roadmap for how we can pay for our kids to get to college. Touchdown.
Yeah, I feel very confident about it now. Before it was like hope, like I hope we can do it, but now I feel like I know we will.
Yeah. Love that. It's powerful. You guys. You totally took control of your life. I'm so proud of you. You really heroes. Very, very well done. Congratulations.
So how many of the kids you bring with you to the two oldest ones that want to speak with us? Oh, right. And they went to the class. They attended all the classes with us. OK, so they probably know it better than like me now, right? I hope so.
I so this is Violet and this is Penny and they're how old. She's 14 and he's 12. All right. Way to go. Go. Good job. Very, very cool. Well, we got a copy of Chris Hogan's book for you Everyday Millionaires, and that's the next chapter in your hero story. You go on and be millionaires now and soon. Those five kids to school debt free. You are you are rocking.
It is awesome, man. Thank you. So proud of y'all. Well done. Well done. All right. OK, they've been practicing their debt free scream. Yeah, yeah.
No, no, she's psyching me out here.
All right, here we go. Sixty two thousand dollars paid off in twelve months, making one oh five the one seventeen. Count it down.
Let's hear a debt free scream three to one. We're free I.
Well, I love it. Oh, they're changing legacy, I love it. Five kids, five kids can't swing a kid without hitting the kid. I'm going to use that line. Me too. That's a keeper I love. But the I sometimes I hear well, you can't do Dave Ramsey stuff. You can't do this. You know, common sense doesn't work if you've got a bunch of children.
They busted in the last it's their home, they busted at all five kids living in California, working for the government, they're busting all the things. You can't do it. That's right. You can't do any of the things they did. No, but they did them anyway.
They did it all. And she's beautiful in this guy's shirt is I mean, they just look great.
They look great. They look great. They brought it. Man, this is celebration day.
I'm just you. I've made my whole week. Thank you all so much. Very cool. Very cool. Well done. Well done. This you don't hear this anywhere else. You can't turn on the radio anywhere else in here that. No, nowhere else. No time with five kids say no to get you guys. I'm debt free. I'm changing. I can't hear you can't hear anything positive out there. You die. That's all you hear on the other trip.
Not these not those guys. T7 this is the Dave Ramsey Show. Dr. John Deloney Ramsey personality is my co-host today on the air. We've heard all the excuses from people that they used to put off making a whale, like if I do a whale, I might die.
You're going to die. Done research, 100 percent of you ain't making it out alive.
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It's just a grown up thing to do. All right.
Todd is with us. Todd's in Sacramento. Hey, Todd, welcome to The Dave Ramsey Show. Thank you for taking my call. Sure. What's up? So we are trying to buy some land and one of the one of the process things we were thinking about was to sell our home and move into a fifth wheel. And I was trying to figure out if that might be a good idea.
And we we mean my wife and four kids. And so the thought process would be is we would buy the land and put the hookups on the property and so we would be able to live there while the house is being built. And then a conclusion of housing being built. We sell the house. We sell the trailer and truck. How long is it going to take you to build the house? I'm assuming probably about a year from. I couldn't do that either, the way I answer questions here is what would I do if I was in your shoes?
And it wouldn't be that OK? Truthfully, this sounds like a nightmare.
The I mean, a lot of people it's a lot of people in a trailer, a fifth wheel. I mean, you know, I guess it depends on your family.
Maybe your family is adventurous and they think this is fun or something. My family would not think this is fun. And my wife, my wife would not be on board with this. I can just tell you. And so and that enters into the discussion.
But I mean, people do all kinds of things. I've talked to a guy not long ago.
He bought a 5000 dollar used mobile home for cash and, you know, took two hundred thousand from the sale of his house, saved another 100000 and built a three hundred thousand dollar house, took him three years. And he lived in that little dumpy trailer for three years while he was doing that. I couldn't do that.
So I can't and I don't I'm one of these people that says I'm not going to ask you to do something like Dave Ramsey said that I wouldn't do so because that's hypocritical to me. So you can do it if you want to. I won't say that you're dumb or something. I would say you wouldn't buy a brand new one because it's going to lose, you know, half its stinking value when you drive it off the lot.
No, I thought prices would be truck and trade would be probably about 40 grand total. And then that's probably going to be worth twenty when you sell it. Yeah. And so we would lose some. But as my wife doesn't she she's the one who brought the trailer up.
And I thought you initially kind of crazy, but your gut reaction was correct.
How old how old are your kids? Ten, eight, four and ten months, yeah, there's a zero percent chance this ends well for anybody. This is not this.
It's just real close quarters for I think I'm going to go at this another way. I would rent a house, spend a little money. You know, you're going to lose twenty thousand dollars on this hook up anyway. So I would rent a house and lose my twenty thousand dollars. That way you could lose your marriage.
And at least two of those kids, at least two of them are going to hurt the other one.
But yeah, the I, I mean, again, you earn if you pull this off and come out of it mentally healthy and your marriage is healthy and everything, financially, you're going to be OK.
But if you pull this off, you would be an unusual family that pulls us off. Most people that did this would rue the day. At the end of it, they're going, thank God, that was awful.
It sounds like one of those YouTube of vacation plans where there's there's always a YouTube channel of somebody doing something crazy or a Pinterest channel where somebody create a new thing out of egg cartons and pony hair or whatever weird thing. And it's just like, well, we can do that. And you end up in a mess and nobody likes you and your neighbors want to burn your house. It's just like, man, there's a reason why things work most of the time, right?
Yeah.
You know, so yeah, I'm telling you, I probably would not do this, but but I'm also not going to just absolutely tell you not to do it if you choose to do it. But it's unusual.
Weird and so and the reason it is, is it's a lot of people in a very close quarter. And it just doesn't sound fun. I me do this if you do decide to do it, e-mail me it, ask John at Ramsey Solutions dot com, because I'm going to have you on my show. I'm going to chronicle this with you and follow him through the year. All right. Lucie's in Oklahoma City. Hi, Lucy. How are you?
Good. How are you? Better than I deserve. What's up? First, I just want to say thank you, I listen to your show a few years back religiously, and I paid off like my thirty four thousand and maybe about eight months or so. And I got that very well done. But I have another a question. I'm purchasing a home for my sister, Cash, and it sits on about an acre and it's only had two previous owners, a mother and a son.
And I am wondering whether I should purchase title insurance. I figured if I would just do title a title search and purchase the abstracting work, I'd save about fifteen hundred or more.
Yeah, I would buy title insurance. I won't buy a piece of property without title insurance. That's just too much crap that happens in title, and, you know, if it's a normal transaction, you're probably perfectly safe. So the land has only had two owners since win 7500 hundreds.
I mean, the mother I don't know, on the land, I don't know. The house is what the mother built that house and what in a subdivision.
Yes, yeah, and how long is the subdivision been there? Right. And who owns your subdivision before and did they did the brother that was the heir who ran off to California crazy. Did he actually sign off when the guy four pieces for decades ago before the subdivision was actually there, that he actually signed off on it? Or is he going to show up and want a piece of all of your lots?
Right. This is why you get title insurance. OK, weird crap happens, I bought a piece of property one time and four places back in the title four years ago, one brother did not sign. There were four siblings. One brother did not sign. He showed up on his money. And he said, hey, I want a fourth of this property, and technically he was correct. So what happened? The title insurance company wrote him a check.
Because I had title insurance and I've just own too many pieces of real estate and seen weird, wacky stuff, I always buy title insurance. And for 99 percent of people out there, I always recommend you get a home inspection when you're buying a property, even from your sister.
I do want a high five, Lucy, though, she's like somebody who is following a plan and actually does research and she figured out what to do.
It doesn't abstract, you know, something about it.
Act like the world's happening to her.
I love folks like that. Yeah, she did get in going. OK, I don't understand this fee. Why is this be worth it? It's not worth it. I can just go to the title search and pull it out. Totally abstract is just the history. That's the breakdown of who owned it before.
Before. Before it's the bigot's. Mm hmm.
You know, at the beginning of the beginning of the New Testament, right? That's right. And you go right down the title and that's your abstract and you can see the flow of it.
And again, 99 percent of the time you're OK. And I've owned probably 20 pieces of property and I've only had a title problem two or three times. So it doesn't happen very often. But boy, when it does. Man, oh, man, oh, man.
That puts us of the Dave Ramsey Show and the books.
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