Transcribe your podcast
[00:00:00]

Blow it that way. Get ready. You guys got to blow it that way. And if you get it to here first, you guys drink the water. If you get it to here first, you win.

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So when I say go, you start blowing. Okay? There. It's in the middle. Now.

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Ready, set, go.

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I'm not checking out. Trying to tell you what, baby.

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You have to release it, babe. No. Come this way. No, right here, please. Come on.

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No, here. No. Come here. He's going to die. You need to hurry.

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Oh, well, we'll just cook him. We'll have a panfish. Is he going to move his mouth? No, he's not going to do nothing.

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It's over.

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No, it's over. No, rich, it's on the fireplace.

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52 pickup, right? Yeah. Say it. 52 pickup. And I have promised to play the whole game.

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Yes, you have. You say that. I promise. I'll tell you why it's called 52 pickup. There's 52 cars in your dick.

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Yeah. You get to pick them up. You what?

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You got to be kidding me about this.

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You it go up with it a little bit. That was your fault. Come on, Corey, chew that. You can't try that on somebody.

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Spit it out. Ready?

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Something that you'll eat if you don't. I don't care. I'll put on the. What? So where?

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Here.

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Thank you.

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This is not it.

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You like it? No. $75,000 ticket. Yeah, you're going to love. So she took the lottery ticket, stole it from somebody.

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Or somebody stole her prize. So she was left with the lottery ticket, and it was $175,000. Yeah. So if you were the one that bought the ticket, we understand you need one. So I actually kind of feel bad giving you this for a gift, but we'll go for it anyway.

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All right, you can open your eyes.

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No. Yeah.

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Mark might need more. Oh, yeah. Well, our.

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Oh, my God. Is that a snake? It's a dummy.

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She didn't even see.

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Shut up. What? Shut up. No, for real. Oh, my God.

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Match three. Oh, you didn't mean that. No. Stop. Match three.

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Bike amount. Win that amount. One I want kicked out for dollar. Stop.

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So mean.

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Stop. No, it's a mouse. A mouse.

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What are our animals doing? We don't know. They're freaking out. They're there. It's in there.

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We caught it. No, he doesn't want to kill it.

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Okay.

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I don't know. Why is it in my house? Yeah, e like it?

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We did good. We had a good it. You have me smoke

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you taking it in the car?

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Why are you taking it to Paulette's house, my force, and said to me, let your shoes look at the beauty we don't. Mom and cherish.

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This is really.

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It really is. Something special. Something special. Something special. I can't lie about that.

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Even Gabby said it was something special. This is supposed to be too good. Take the plastic off. Take the plastic. Take the plastic off.

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Now. Look at that.

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What is it?

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I may. Boy, did you love it as much as I do.

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Ashley. Happy birthday to you.

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Whoa.

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You're expecting that?

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Lift up on the top board. Get your fingers. Anything. Just lift it up.

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Just lift up on the top board. Lift up on the top board there.

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Nice job.

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It's. It's a tanning bed. That's not funny. You just go outside and you dance right on the deck.

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Do you think that's funny?

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Santa told all of us. She told all of us. You wanted this. No, I didn't. It was like Barbie House.

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Did you say something else? Because all of her furniture. Yeah. You don't want this. You don't want that.

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Are you serious? You can bring your ninja Charles up here and play on us. They can totally take it over. Well, Connor, we can't send it back to North Pole, so you're going to have to take it home and put it. You'll be fine.

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Your friends will like it. Your friends will make fun of you.

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I'm out of here. You may not want to go because you got another thing in here. Hey, Connor. Oh, you know what? Why was Ron opened the wrong one?

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That one was Madison. Oh, man. Is that one yours? Can you close your eyes again? Are you close altogether?

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Really tight. Really? Sure. No, not yet. Stay where you're at.

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Ready? Open them.

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That's the stuff that goes with the teenage mutant Ninja Turtles. Yeah, lots of teenage mutants. And then Obi. There's a mouse in there. No, there's not a mouse in there.

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Yes, there is. Yes, there is. There's no mouth in there.

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Hold on, buddy. Take out his shirt. Look at the mouse.

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Oh, my. Daddy.

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Am I looking at us the right way? Yeah, you're looking at her.

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How else can you only move one penny and make it do one? Look at them visually. I am looking at them visually. What do you think you'd have to move? 1234.

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What would make sense to make it? Think that's going to get it.

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What do you have to do? I don't know. I give up. Give up? No.

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Joey of Jen. Can I do it? Go for it, Jen. It's gonna blow your mind.

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1230 my God.

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You gotta open these. No, I'm gonna put it back in the box. No, don't rip it off. I want to save it.

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I love it. You know what? I want to give it to Nancy.

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Terrible.

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I didn't know. I didn't see back here filming. I know exactly what you got. Hey, listen, I'm sick. No bull butter.

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I don't believe it. I don't believe it.

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Do you have some lotion?

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Will you come around here?

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No, you just pulled it out. But sometimes it got hard to make ants meet. So after a while of struggling, my mom, she decided to get a job as an exotic dancer. A stripper, basically.

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Oh, no, stop that. Stop it. Listen, I don't want that. But mama after work so much, she bring different meals home. Stop that.

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Oh, no, don't put that on the Internet because.

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No, they'll think that's true. Everybody knows me. The channel changer. The channel changer.

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It might be. It might be up here. Is it up here?

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Called my nap.

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Happy birthday.

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It. So how are we gonna mount it to the wall? I know, but like, horror.

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My cross. Stop.

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What? Z.

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In that cupboard there for you. A coffee cup. There's big cups, little cups. Head over here. Wow.

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We are so excited to announce. Oh, great.

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Bad news. Are we going back to school? It says, we are excited to announce that schools have now reopened. Please have your child join us at 10:00 a.m.. Today.

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That's great. Let's get shots. I'm sorry. No.

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You guys should be so excited to go back and see your friends. Really? Yeah. Today. Welcome, guys.

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We had a long break. I mean, we had, like, you know, three weeks off.

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All right. It's April fool's joke. Oh, horrible. Why would that think you're in love? What do you mean?

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I'm like, what? Where is that?

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Number one, decide to go somewhere else. What else is in there? And number two, $5 here to this hotel. And I'm at to call each one of individuals. It's a chicken nugget.

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Yeah. You got to eat a boy. No, it tastes like earwax.

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Did you get one of David's or the boys? That's David.

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I picked the first cantaloupe. Do you want to pick the first watermelon? Go for it. Okay. Which one is it?

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Think it's that one over there. Can you see how those are really light? That was dark. Just walk on through. Take your time.

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Be careful. Be careful.

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Oh, yeah.

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Got you. Did you record it? I did. Your dad asked me to record it and send it to you afterwards. Oh, my goodness.

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I didn't think you fall for it. Little honey man.

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I hate you. I hate you. Did you see that? Oh, I should have got my.

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Who put that on me? The snakes can land it on her arm.

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African angels. American. South America. North America and come to my car.

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That kid.

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What is that? What? I don't think it's alive. I think it's. I don't know.

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Why would they put that in there's. Did you know that came that one? Nope.

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Gotcha.

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If you can drink that apple juice without moving the towel.

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Okay. Drink that. Real money. That's real. $100.

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Drink the apple juice. That was funny. I already know it took you this, but it shows us.

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Open it. No. Take it off.

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Take it off. No way.

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How did you know that as me? Oh, my God.

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Turn it around. You're taking a video. Someone. Yeah. Take a selfie.

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Turn to the sun's not face.

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I've read this is the best way to do it because then you can freeze frame the picture you want. What are we doing? We're blowing on the stupid thing. Oh, 80ft of water.

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That's what he said we could, man. I was hoping to get one of like.

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Yeah, he said yeah.

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Snakes.

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Okay, we're going to get one. Go, Ellie. Do you guys need any help opening them? No. Okay.

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Here's your little food. There you go.

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What's wrong?

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What's wrong?

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Oh, no. They put a sponge and your sponge off.

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Ooh.

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Now make a wish. Now wait. Kenny, come over here. I don't. Okay, no.

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One, two. No. Three.

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Mouth.

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That's it.

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You everything to me. Without you, I'll do nothing at all whatsoever. And I'm going to come and leave both by. I'm going to come overlap. Okay.

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Wow.

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Oh, great.

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Can you help me find it, please? I spent a lot of money on that.

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I'm so sorry, Mimi. I'm always messing stuff up. Okay, let's just relax. Everyone just relax. It's okay.

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I can't find the ring.

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I can't find the ring.

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I can't stand him. I'm done. I felt like my life was in danger.

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Okay, listen, though, you're playing around. Come here, babe.

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All right. Beautiful place. Come on. I thought my life was in danger. Ginger.

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Easy. Turn it, turn it, turn it. There you go.

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Are you serious? What is it? You got it? Rotten banana and orange. Come here.

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It's a fruit ninja. Fruit ninja knowing it for a fruit ninja throw in stars.

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Merry Christmas, Haley. Hope you enjoy your new ninja. Be careful. Very sharp part. You serious?

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James, there's water all over the floor in here. It's running down the whole thing. Oh, no, the water's running down out of the thing.

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It's noted.

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That's not it.

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I'm gonna turn this water to gel with it.

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Bring the blue up on that side.

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Bring the blue up and then hold it there.

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Push and hold it there. Got it.

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Then after that's.

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Did we do that to you? No, we watched it on american 22 videos. Puplit and sinker. Sucker.

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I don't have to clean it, right, Maynard? Don't you dare. Don't you dare. Maynard. Do it.

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Don't be a baby. Either gonna stand there all freaking night, or I'll just go to.

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You'd think it's an outhouse, right? Yeah. Now, look, watch this.

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Don't hit spring loaded. I didn't know. Daddy Lou, I. Oh, my God. There's some neighbors here I got to show this to.

[00:31:35]

So I bet I can drink this water without touching the rag. What? I can drink it without touching the rag.

[00:31:51]

It's magic. Yeah, magic. Okay, so now I'm going to drink it without touching rag.

[00:32:13]

Take the rag off. I drank it was the rank it. Yeah, take the rest. Drag off.

[00:32:27]

Oh, he just pooped on his head. Oh, no, it.

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Yeah, but the man helped. That was good.

[00:32:49]

Oh.

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What she. Do you hear that crack? No.

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We pranked you.

[00:33:09]

Hi. Ever deep. Could you open this? What is it? Tell us how to put what it is.

[00:33:14]

It's fly eggs, right?

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Rappers block. We.

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Yeah. Win 25,000. I just won 25,000. Oh, man. Got to be.

[00:34:14]

Well, it says winning tickets of 10,000 or more. You got to submit claim by mail. Claim form supplied by ten.

[00:34:26]

That's so funny, dude. I got mine. I got mine. What's the deal? I said quiet.

[00:34:36]

Please don't be. Quinn would have a 10,000 box. Kim. Ticket. Where'd you get the ticket?

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Where did you get the ticket? Can I pass it? Where did you get the ticket? I won 5000.

[00:35:21]

I'm having a heart attack right now. Death. Kim. It's fake.

[00:35:39]

Just channel. No, you're going to burn the face down. Stop.

[00:35:51]

Oh, my God. Keep reading.

[00:35:59]

What is it?

[00:36:10]

I had nothing to do with this. This is all. Oh, my God. Oh, my God.

[00:36:26]

Oh, goodness.

[00:36:29]

So crazy, dude. It. It got it. Open candle. You were such a goofball.

[00:36:52]

Tell you. Look at the box you made. You are dead. So I told the girls that if I got to pour two cups of water over each of their heads that I'd give them $10 each. So if I get poured two cups of water over each of their heads, I have the other two.

[00:37:10]

Can you show them? Have the other two right there. So I'll give you each $10 if I get to pour two cups of water over your head. You ready?

[00:37:22]

It? One, two, three.

[00:37:31]

Michael.

[00:37:34]

All right, I'm going in. Have fun playing outside, girls. I thought you said I don't want to do the other two. I'm not going to give you $10. I'm just going to do one it.

[00:38:12]

Oh, my God.

[00:38:16]

Oh, my God. Max. Three amounts and you win that amount. I won $5,000. What?

[00:38:24]

I want $5,000. Are you kidding me? I won $5,000. Are you laughing?

[00:38:34]

You did.

[00:38:41]

Oh, my God. I don't have a heart attack. Calm down.

[00:38:47]

$4500. Mama. Calm down. Mama. Breathe.

[00:38:51]

Okay. Breathe. Okay. No, really win that amount. $5,000.

[00:39:01]

You.

[00:39:17]

It's one of them cards you get that shows big amounts of money and everything on it. I didn't know it was a joke.

[00:39:31]

It's a heading out. We need something stronger. Okay, lift it up. Lift it up. Lift it up, you guys.

[00:39:47]

Oh, my God.

[00:39:51]

Oh, Pop.

[00:40:01]

Just kind of like, lean it that way. Just a short little. Oh, my hang is we take some canned processed meat, sometimes known as spam, and made a popsicle out of it. And so what I'm going to be doing now is chocolate covering them so that they'll have no idea that what may somehow look like a strawberry popsicle is actually a spam sickle.

[00:40:35]

We go all covered up. Nice and pretty light.

[00:40:44]

All covered. Okay, now you have a spam sickle. Nobody will know the difference. Hopefully mine just fine. I can use it.

[00:41:20]

I have tsunami. Can I take the salami away from him? Take it. Take it.

[00:41:32]

What is that? What is that? Plant plastic? It's a prank. Today's April fool's Day.

[00:41:49]

One avocado tree.

[00:41:53]

There will be growing one publix avocado. Watch this. It's bare as a bone. There's no avocados in this tree. My mom has known this, like, down here.

[00:42:09]

Attach one avocado to one avocado. She would be very impressed.

[00:42:18]

Jerry is looking to them. Look at. I see that.

[00:42:25]

She's got avocados.

[00:42:39]

That is too funny. What? You know this? We're planted. Look at the stems.

[00:42:48]

Oh, my God. Look at it is. It's a string. It grew right in there.

[00:42:57]

Supposed to be a Christmas decoration. Can you take a picture of that those were planted. Bomb. Okay, now we'll go show her the video you did.

[00:43:16]

Aiden, I'm so sorry.

[00:43:25]

You kidding me? Oh, my God.

[00:43:35]

That was you? Okay, let's do this. Ready?

[00:43:54]

It's not funny.

[00:43:59]

All right, everybody run away. Where are you coming from, guys? Coming from.

[00:44:07]

Shut up. Is it coming from.

[00:44:13]

Look down. There's water coming out of the bathroom and scared.

[00:44:51]

All right, you. It's drying.

[00:45:21]

That's it. Oh, my goodness. Everyone, I'm going to drink it without lifting the lid.

[00:45:47]

God. Okay.

[00:45:55]

No, it's not. Oh, I. So we are going to make this quarter go inside this water bottle.

[00:46:07]

All right? So let's cover this. Andy, we're going to say the magic word. Do you know what the magic word, though? Do you remember?

[00:46:20]

Ready? Do it with you. Bam.

[00:46:25]

And poop, poop, poop. All right, Daddy, look down in there. See? What happened?

[00:46:40]

This. It was a joke. And you'd still underneath the bottle.

[00:47:18]

Work on the gym was great today. Really better, you know.

[00:47:28]

Do me a favor. Do me a favor. Grab me another one of these little bowls from the cupboard there so I can put the seeds in. It's not for carnal real quick, is it? No.

[00:47:56]

Come on, Liko Lee cow. What? You see? We caught him out. We caught him out.

[00:48:20]

We caught him nowhere.

[00:48:46]

You can think about it, Walker.

[00:48:53]

Yes. So what belongs to you, Walker. But we use it more than you. Yes. It's like the answer kind of in the is.

[00:49:06]

It's very obvious. Walker. What belongs to what, Walker. Come on, Walker. What belongs to you, Walker.

[00:49:14]

But other people use it more than you. Me? Yeah. Okay, well, what belongs to you, Walker?

[00:49:26]

I mean, how many words? Okay, let's go, Walker. Let's go, Walker. What belongs to you, Walker?

[00:49:39]

Your name.

[00:49:44]

Okay, go ahead. I'm going to show you how to make videoing it. You tell me when you see how it is. You got the pin. You really want to video, you got to bend it, kind of snap it back like it.

[00:49:56]

So you can get a little thing up there like that to hold on right here. That's all you got to do now, you know how to make one.

[00:50:22]

Oh, my God. Literally agree. Horizontal. Horizontal. No, you broke your egg.

[00:50:27]

Okay. It's okay. Ready, dad? Ready? One.

[00:50:30]

Okay. This is going to be a mess. Okay. One, two, three.

[00:50:39]

I don't know.

[00:50:43]

I got no idea what happened. We pranked you. Ours blowed out.

[00:50:58]

Y'all better not be pranking something. Come out. Take the stuff it out.

[00:51:07]

Not. Yes, it. Damn piece of paper. Read. It's hi, happy birthday.

[00:51:34]

Okay, that's not the room. Thank you, whoever that's from. Okay.

[00:51:42]

You. It don't want this one outside to cook.

[00:52:18]

Nava, did you get it?

[00:52:44]

You called the plumber?

[00:52:50]

What?

[00:52:54]

Water. Look. It's a flood. I have flood insurance. I'm not water coming out of the bathroom.

[00:53:02]

You're a trickster. He's been waiting to do this all day. What a trickster.

[00:53:10]

There you go. Mommy. Open your gift.

[00:53:34]

So I'm about to crank my wife with the mouse and a box. Move out the way.

[00:53:53]

You right.

[00:53:57]

I need help. Come on. We just go. We going. At the countless week.

[00:54:01]

Wait a minute. My hair in a fight.

[00:54:06]

One, two. Come here. Three. Come on.

[00:54:14]

Got it.

[00:54:19]

Walking the house. Come on. Yeah. Joseph, come get the broom. Come here.

[00:54:24]

Here. Where's the broom?

[00:54:29]

Get your bay out of here. Come on. Come on. Come on. Is it actually in there?

[00:54:39]

We got it. Come on. Come on. Come on. Okay.

[00:54:44]

Come on, Darian. Let it up. Jared, come here. Jared. Joe, hurry up.

[00:54:53]

Come on, Jared. Got it.

[00:55:01]

Is in there. Man, I just seen him catch. Hurry up. Come. Ha.

[00:56:11]

Jimmy, come here. What? Come over here. I want to give you a kiss. Honey, please.

[00:56:17]

Why are you taking a photograph of me? Are you kidding me?

[00:56:26]

Baby, I love you.

[00:56:30]

Give me j.

[00:56:39]

No, you won't. It's just on a street and like tv does. I don't know. We just sat down. You've got such a good meaning here.

[00:57:22]

It's all good. It is. Everything in there is good. He sounds like that. He does sound, man.

[00:57:29]

Who does sound like my son? What are you doing? What in the world you doing? Surprise.

[00:57:40]

Can you believe yourself?

[00:57:47]

Oh, God.

[00:57:53]

Oh, Jackie, I can't hear. My office.

[00:58:01]

Yeah, three.

[00:58:08]

I have some of these tables.

[00:58:15]

Oh, yeah. Everything's fine.

[00:58:22]

What? Oh, he threw your phone in the toilet, Rocco. Yeah, he just did. He just threw it in there. We saw it.

[00:58:33]

Did he flush it? Where's my. I don't know. Why didn't you take it out? Because I didn't know it.

[00:58:41]

Nolan saw it. Why didn't you take it out? I just looked in there and I had to go to the bathroom. And you flushed it. I just don't flush.

[00:58:52]

She figured it out. Where's my phone? Oh, I don't know. Just make us eat you piece. If we don't eat it, I can always give it to the know.

[00:59:04]

Or maybe for Felicia. For who? Felicia. Remember, I've named the deer.

[00:59:15]

It's a new toaster, too. Isn't that nice? Voice activated. What the. It's voice activated.

[00:59:22]

You got to talk to it. Turn on the toast.

[00:59:29]

You must not have did it right. Try it again. Go down. Burn the toast.

[00:59:40]

Yeah, but turn it. Burn the toast. It's.