Meat
The Lupe and Royce Show- 1,298 views
- 8 Oct 2020
In this episode, Lupe and Royce share their perspectives on drinking, explore why Royce never found his “signature drug,” discuss a must-visit city, talk about cars, and tell a “man massage story” that may or may not be podcast-appropriate. Grab your O’Doul’s and get ready to book your next basement haircut!The Lupe & Royce Show is a Say What Media production: https://www.saywhat.mediaThe presenting sponsor of this episode is Blue Microphones: https://www.bluemic.com
Previously on The Leupen Show, Royce, what are you hoping for? I'm voting for these nuts, OK? Is that actually a candidate?
It was at one point, obviously, if I can get him back. Who do you think would be hip hop's best candidate? Hip hop like rappers? Yes, if I like rappers, I've never met a rapper that I want to run the country.
I haven't I haven't even come close the loop in ratio to say what media production, the presenting sponsors Blue Microphone.
What a fiasco. So, Dr. Drew, he went off the rails. That's right.
This is race to five, not broadcasting live from Detroit now, May.
So when you wrote all of Dr. Dre, his raps is did you have to, like, emulate his voice? And that's why you're able to do a really good Dr. Dre impression.
So many ways we could go bad. I didn't write any of Dr. Dre raps. You didn't have to write any when you wrote all of them.
You're projecting on to me your guilt for writing the whole blueprint for Jay-Z.
Is that what that is? I would have loved to have wrote all of the blueprint. You understand the publishing checks that I will be receiving.
Did you see the comics under that picture that you posted? Wait, wait, wait, wait. Which was picture picture will doing us and who Jesus Christ was in it. I think Moses might have been in there.
So the story behind that picture is just randomly in the Dems. Somebody sent me that and was like, hey, I just found this on my computer. And I was like, oh. And in the picture from right to left were from me, I guess. From me for me. Over me to the right, it's me, Lupe Fiasco. If you didn't know, then you have Jay-Z, Sean Carter, Beyonce Blue's father. Right. We are aware.
And then like I think in between maybe Jay and like in the background, I think that's Jackie Robinson who's whose turn like what they call it, provocative.
It's hard to say.
And then to see that in the center of of the photos is we're still traveling to the right. You got Jam and Eli, the legend, the legendary Jomini. And then you have Nas after Jomini.
Jomana is in the background and then Nas, you know, Nas, I heard of this kind of so I'm clear like all of this that you're talking about this all of this fits in one picture, correct?
Yes. All happening. And why? Because you know this. How. And then. Then right after that rest in peace is my brother Eskow. And so it's you have Eskow. Nazar's going to have Jabbar Eskow. So you have to double Eskil.
Don't forget the white guy way in the background. That's Jomini. Oh no. I thought that was me. No, no, no, no, no. It's not true at all. Oh Tom you are.
Tom, you don't even know what I'm doing.
You're just placing yourselves and you're trying to cheerlead at the basketball games, which I got in the comments. I said when I took the picture, I was in the bathroom. I just happened to have to take a look around that time.
What year was that? I think that was like twenty. That was Chip Briony's in London, I think, for sure. And we had did Royal Albert Hall Menas, Rick Ross, Jay-Z, I think it was 2010.
Yeah. What were you doing in 2010. Drinking, drinking.
A lot of alcohol. That's probably why you had to go take a piss being extremely good at it. You know, remember I sobered up and I sober up twenty fourteen. I can't even tell the difference anymore. It's like I'm drunk all the time, especially when I'm when I'm hanging with you. Man, could you just hit me with all of that.
When and when did it feels like what's what's that movie. Remember that. Remember that episode of Seinfeld. This is what Seinfeld Yusof You remember that episode where it was the picture of man at the beach, things like George and his boss or something like that. And they some happened to the picture and he sent it to get touched up or to get like some Photoshop. So it was something done with the picture.
But the guy drew himself in there like, oh, yeah, I think I remember that, like a classic episode. It was like a photograph. But they put him in there is like a painting or something like that.
That's that's what you're trying to do. You're trying to impose yourself into a moment in history, which is cool. I mean, I wish I was Eminem's best friend. I would love to impose myself.
And this is what he does when he's compensating. Yeah, he does this when he's overcompensating to make me feel OK with everything he comes at you.
I just like to level things. That's when. That's when. And that's when all Eminem's shit starts. You know, I'm going through hell and hell hot water with Eminem fans right now.
Wait, so wait. When did the drinking start? I always want to notice I tended to start.
I had my first drink when I was 21, when Dr. Dre and I said I said yes. He asked me if I wanted to drink only because I didn't want to say no peer pressure.
No, not really. Dre pressure. He wasn't pressuring me. Doctor pressure.
It's like Doctor, I was going to say, was it a Dr. Pepper and something it wasn't. It was probably doctor pressure wasn't Dr. Pepper pressure.
He wasn't pressuring me. And up to that point, I kind of like it was like a thing with me to not drink. You know, I was athlete as an athlete. So it's like my brother used to come into the crib drunk all the time and, like, just totally, like, just disturbed the natural energy in the house and get into it with my dad. So I just used to hate that shit because they always used to be at a time where it was like the big bad wolf is finally quiet.
You up in this room. We downstairs, we play video games, we play in Canek for something. It come great stirring shit up, you know, I mean, not a holloran. And, you know, like it's all kinds of shit going on and always just to look at him and just go, yeah, I don't want to be like that. So I'm not. I'm. Knock on door I was the same way I didn't drink because, like my family was was Muslim, so my father didn't drink.
My mom drank, though, but my my brother used to get wasted and all his friends used to get wasted. And then we had a liquor store right across the street, Rothschild's liquor right down Madison on the west side of Chicago. But it would just be like winos and like crazy shit. And I always had, like, the same reasons I had a distaste for, like, I never wanted to die like they portrayed. Yeah, it was that.
And I asked my mom because they used to drink like 46 and 40 was poppin. Right. It's like 90 to three. And my young mom was like, yo, this.
She has got to be delicious the way they drink this, it's got to be the most delicious drink in the world.
Right. And it's a dollar like this is amazing. And I asked my mom, like, you know, what this tastes like. And she has some old rules or dos like the non-alcoholic. You know, the voice, I think is what they call it now. Right.
We call it out in a sobriety were a waste of time. And a cup is such a waste of time. It was disgusting. I will say that it's absolutely disgusting.
People enjoy wasting time. You haven't seen that. I've seen I seen Anchorman where he was like describing somebody like running on the treadmill and like he was like describing it in a way where it was like it was boring as hell to him. So, yeah, evidently people just get on there and they just start running. You know, they start jogging like I think some people call it jogging for sure.
It is that the Swedish DJ. The Scandinavian DJ. Yeah, like Juergen Yagan, Jurgen.
That's the shit right there that us alcoholic's. When we think we're ready to stop, we fuck with that shit to further waste time. You take Odomes out of the equation and like I'm sober two years earlier.
God damn it, what do I try? I try switching the wine on the weekends. I try to do it my way and it just wasn't working.
My friend is the he's he's the global CEO of Heineken and we just lost the adult sponsorship. Thank you. I think Heineken is. Or do I think it is. Yeah.
Or or something else is some something one other brand that they do. But anyway when I, when we would get together he would just order massive amounts. Heineken would just pop up just a truck of Heineken would drive out of the ocean and drop off a case or whatever for the crew. But I would always be like, man, let me get send me the non-alcoholic but non-alcoholic beer is disgusting. Like beer is disgusting. Not my whole point of saying that was, you know, I was disgusted by the taste of beer.
And I was like, this is the shit. That's all the drinking. And it's like, well, we drink it because of the drug. That's like that's why we drink. We don't drink because the taste. But there are people who actually like the taste. I think it's gross. I've had like Japanese non-alcoholic beers, fucking gross.
I kind of like to taste the beer, you know. Yeah, that had to be really cool. I wouldn't say really cold, but but somewhat cold beers. Disgusting.
I mean, sitting back on a hot summer day, having a cold beer in the backyard.
If you really unpack this, you don't really need beer. We got tequila, you know, so me as an addict, I like the way that I think like why in the world what I want beer when I can just drink tequila.
You know what? I'm with you in this case, you're with him in this. Because if I ever did. Yeah, if I ever decided to drink, I would drink. I would go straight to moonshine like immediately. Like I wouldn't stop, I wouldn't like build up to moonshine. It would be moonshine. And then when I wasn't drinking moonshine, it would be absent. Have you ever had absinthe.
Have I had. What do you mean I would have. I have I like consumed it. Like what do you have. I had it like have I done a magic trick with it.
Have you ever held a bottle of it. Have you ever held a bottle of absinthe in your hands and then took the top off, then pulled the cork out and then drank it into your body? Have you ever had absinthe in that way?
That's an understatement.
Why is it good? Because what do they call it? They call it like the green, the Green Goblin or the what do they call it?
The Green Fairy. I love that. I'm not proud of what I'm about to say, OK? Yes, you are. Yes, you are. I'm ready. And I'm really not. I'm a good guy. You are.
You're a deep, wonderful man. So continue with this story. Yes.
Absinthe, it's delicious. It tastes like black licorice now. Everybody don't like black licorice. I like black licorice if my liquor tastes like it. I don't like black licorice. If I if I'm getting licorice, it's not delicious in the context of Twizzlers, but it tastes very good if you're talking about liquor tasting like that, especially some proof shit.
Yeah. I think anything that doesn't taste like chemicals, it once you step out of that context, the chemical context, and you get into just any type of flavoring, I think anything would taste better than brake fluid.
No, no, no. Different different things are different paint for me.
This picture of this absinthe engagement. We're many moments. Lupe Fiasco. I don't have any good ones with absinthe. That was one tough cookie that absol seem to think about absinthe. It's very, very hard to gauge. It's hard to judge. So it's like you drink it, it goes down real smooth, it tastes pretty good and it doesn't hit you. Right. By the way, I was one of those drinkers, I was kind of like there was a lot of arrogance to my drinking.
So, like, if I wasn't feeling like the buzz, like I was used to feeling as fast as I would normally feel it and I would just be like, you know, just give me another shot. And I think, like one of the one of the times I did, like, you know, because I can't I can't do drugs. Like, I'm I'm not a drugs guy. I tried as hard as I can to, like, find a drug to be my thing.
You tried as hard as you can. We'll get back to that. You were looking for your signature drug. We'll save that rabbit hole for another time.
It's not really a rabbit hole. It was a very short live search. So search. I came to a crossroads pretty fast. I see the absolute and absolute. It was like I was drinking it and I was extremely wasted, but I didn't know because it was so smooth. So for some reason I thought it was a good idea to do edible and the whole edible thing. That's a whole nother thing. So it's like, so you did absinthe, right?
Shots of absinthe, like not knowing, understanding that it's one of the most powerful liquors on the planet, I'm assuming. Right.
Well, I understood I understood that part. Lupe Fiasco. But the delayed effect and the smoothness kind of lulled you into a sense of like, I can handle this.
Yeah, because we can't underestimate we can't underestimate my power. You know, I'm saying like, I got power.
You were fighting against. I see. It was like a competition. It wasn't a fight. It was like a pep rally. Now I say, OK. And then on top of this pep rally. Right. You added into the mix inedible. Well, what kind of edible gummy bears or something like that?
I had, like, you know, options for the edibles. I had there were a lot of different directions I could go. And apparently in retrospect, I chose the worst one, which is a Rice Krispie treat.
You were at an edible buffet and you chose the Rice Krispie treat. Yeah. And Rice Krispie treat just happened to be delicious. I mean, what what Rice Krispie treat isn't delicious.
Maybe the one with drugs in it, maybe that one on top of, you know, eight shots of absinthe, maybe that one maybe that Rice Krispie edible isn't the best, the best.
Go to see what a low power do. So I'm eating. Will you dunk in the Rice Krispie in absinthe? Did you really make a show of it?
No, it was like a Rice Krispie treat that was like this big. It was like it wasn't meant for like consumption. And at one time and I just sat there and snack on it while I was drinking, one thing led to another. I looked up and I was doing this.
That's me. Right?
That's like going to the movies and watching TV, like that's like bringing a TV and a radio into the movies. And just like I'm going to watch this movie and watch TV and listen to this radio at the same time to it's kind of overkill.
So I want to ask you about the your absinthe experience, because there's levels to the game, right? There's actually like in Paris and this is what I would do. I would be I will be that guy just like often started drinking. I'm going to Paris to go to the Absinthe Cafe where it all started, where they do the whole sexy little they filter it through the sugar. Are you aware of this process? I don't know about that. Yeah.
So absinthe is like a whole sexy little preparation, almost like a sushi chef, you know, like they have that. They have it. They strain it almost like coffee, I guess, and they put it on like a lump of sugar. Then they then they felt they pour through the sugar and then it gets into the glass and it has the whole like like situation.
I wish I would have went to a place like that. I would be like, oh, what are you doing? Give me the damn liquor, do all that stuff with it.
But that's what absinthe is like. It is that the experience of from from from what I've seen my understanding of absinthe, I had an experience know.
But you had like a ghetto ass experience with Rice Krispie treats.
And at home we should go to like a absinthe cafe and not drink, but just see the experience. I think that means you should do that. I think we should just go to see what it potentially could have been for you if you were still about that life.
Yeah, we got can go live in a bath. That would be awesome for me.
We'll just watch it. We don't we won't do it. We won't partake.
It would do wonders for my sobriety to sit there and just look at it. And I think we should stay away from that idea.
You're listening to the Loop and Roy Show with Lupe Fiasco, Royce five nine and Tom Frank. We want to thank Blue Microphones for supporting our show. For 25 years, Blue has helped people to find and amplify their voices. And today they had to make a choice for millions of musicians, podcasters and YouTube. No matter what kind of content you create, Blue has a set up that will make you sound and look great. If you've ever thought about creating your own podcast or stream, check out the Yeti Kastor.
It's a complete MC and boom arm system that connects to your laptop. Bringing the ultimate broadcast studio to your home or office. Now is the perfect time to start your creative project. So visit Blue Mike Dotcom and click get started to start telling your story.
You're listening to Lupe and Roy Show with Lupe. Fiasco writes to five nine and Tom Frank, you've been to the Middle East. Yeah. You've been in like Dubai and all that. So Dubai has a lot because there's no alcohol there. Well, there is, but it's not supposed to be air quotes, right. So in the gas station, there's like a non-alcoholic Budweiser and then they have like different flavors. So it's like Apple, Budweiser, but it's all non-alcoholic.
Then they have like this like a fake champagne type thing, non-alcoholic like champagne, as opposed to take in, you know, replace champagne and like, sexy events. But it's like super expensive. The super expensive juice, you know, for the sexy, it's interesting over there, man, I'm wondering how can you have so much money and be so strict? Money doesn't money. Money doesn't come with discipline, like they don't go hand-in-hand.
But driving over there is like the death penalty. It's like crazy. Like same thing like like marijuana. And in Singapore, it's like you will be beheaded. It's like dissensions for marijuana is death. So like edibles is death. And if you fly to Dubai, it's like alcohol is like and if you get caught driving this crazy, you know, a strict because of the religion. Right. So like Dubai is Muslim, Singapore is kind of Muslim.
Like is the it's almost like the state religion is Muslim, but there's like Daoist and Buddhist and all that stuff in there, too. But it's like considered to be like a Muslim country. They're very strict, but there's alcohol and there's alcohol and and pork and Singapore, but not in not in Dubai or Abu Dhabi. You spent a lot of time over there. And you actually Knox and then I spent a little in Singapore.
Yes. Singapore is a lovely country. It's a great place to go. You have been.
I have. But I don't I don't think I really remember anything in particular about it.
It's like one big mall, basically just a giant. And it's hot, super hot.
I feel like I would have remembered that the whole place was just a mall. Can you be a little more specific? Because obviously, obviously, it's not just one big mall.
It's super clean. There's the food stalls and you go into the flu. None of that. Do you remember going to Singapore or were you like Absinthe and Rice Krispies out?
Like just like I remember from Rapide was involved. I remember I was writing some raps I was laying in Singapore. Did you go for sports? That's not when people go. They're known for their F1 races. They're F1 night race.
It's basically you drive through the city, you drive, you drive through the city like you can drive one of those cars I actually drove in an F1 car, but Sholto Lewis Hamilton. But I drove in a Indy car in Vegas with Mario Andretti drove. And when they have these two seater because, you know, it's like one it's like one seat. And if you don't drive and you can't drive it, but they make some there are two seaters.
It's like a jet. It looks like a jet, a jet engine, like a jet, like a like a fighter jet. And there's two seats. There's one in front one. And you got to get taller.
You got to get out of those things. What do you mean get taught? I mean, I don't know. You say, you know how to drive them. Is there anything different from just a regular car? Yes.
A goddamn race car, like with one seat in the middle. Like, what are you talking what are you talking about? Yeah, you have to learn how to drive Indy car.
You got to turn left was hard. It was hard about it. It's a whole like process.
Like it's very technical. It's a lot of computers. The steering wheel looks like a video game like his. You know, it's super fast.
You got to have an understanding of the tires. You got to have an understanding of the we need to just get Lewis on the podcast and just have him kind of explain, like, what it what it means to be an F1 driver, you know, but it is is super dangerous. That's the thing, because a super fast and like, you got to be really, really cognizant of the tyres because they were down really fast and like down forces and stuff like that was really scientific.
You know, it's not just like jump in and drive, you know, all of this because I'm smart.
That's what I bring to the cast. I bring a high level of intensity. Why are you interested in this? Because I like car, you know, like cars. You know, that you have access to like Eminem's whole car collection, which I hear is phenomenal.
I love cars. I love cars, but I don't I'm not into F1 racing. What do you drive? What you mean what car do you drive?
What does this have to do with anything? I feel like this is a gateway to go somewhere bad, bro.
You just talked about getting high off Rice Krispie treats and absinthe and then not remembering whether you were in Singapore or not, which is fucking wild.
But now you fellas, you know, you're a little hesitant.
You're right. You're right. You're right. You're right. I drive a IMGs. Yeah. Super sporty. I got an SLS AMG. So it's the big body version of that, the granddaddy of that car. Now, I'm not saying how to say it. I'm say yours. I think yours looks better, honestly, but mine's is the shit. It's such a great car. I'm not flashy like that.
Well, some of the Amjed is flashy.
Is Bolz on my door opens just like everybody else, bro. Yeah, but your door opens to a cavalcade of electronics and expensive luxury.
You are listening to the loop in Russia with Lupe Fiasco and Royce, the Fab Nine.
We want to thank blue microphones for supporting our show. For 25 years, Blue has helped people to find and amplify their voices. And today they had a make of choice for millions of musicians, podcasters and YouTube. No matter what kind of content you create, Blue has a set up that will make you sound and look great. If you've ever thought about creating your own podcast or stream, check out the Yeti Caster. It's a complete MC and boom arm system that connects to your laptop.
Bringing the ultimate broadcast studio to your home or office. Now is the perfect time to start your creative project. So visit Blue Mike Dotcom and click get started to start telling your story.
Well, how did you get away from my interrogation? How did you get into NASCAR? No, so I listen, my my NASCAR experience, it runs deep and I it's actually been in some cases very horrifying, but also at the same place, like, I guess we're like you'll get involved. Did to come to well, first of all, Indy car, NASCAR, two different things, OK, NASCAR is the way they just go in a circle right where Bubba Wallace and all those dudes drive.
And those are the ones that look like I guess they kind of look like normal cars. But, you know, those doors don't open like they got to climb out the window or climb at the top. It's really just like a frame, a chassis with with the roll bar and all that. And then they just put the body on top, just cover the whole car, you know, but that comes off. But Indy car is like the cars with the one seat in the middle.
And then, you know, the wheels are exposed.
So you can see, like, the the the what? Like the rods in the pistons, you know, and then it got like the wing in the back. You know, and they sit and look at the helm and they sit and they're exposed like they're out outside of the car, so that's IndyCar and Indy car and NASCAR related because they're both like American, right? Like Indy cars, like the American version of F1, which is like the European or the global version of that type of racing.
But Indy car normally goes around in a circle just like NASCAR. But there are road tracks. I was going to say that to you, to Tom. Like, they don't just go in a circle, like there's some railroad tracks.
Which one is faster Indian or the NASCAR?
I think India is faster, but not by like it isn't like NASCAR's 200 in these 300. It's not like that. You know, it's like maybe 30, 40 miles faster or something like that. I think F1 is the fastest, but speed doesn't matter because in NASCAR is continuously fast. But like F1 and Indy car, because you're hitting corners and turns, you got a brake and slow down like you never really brake are supposed to break NASCAR. Right.
But an Indy car, if you don't break in corner like you'll crash and go off the road and shit like that, I don't use my brakes.
Why would you be proud? Why would you even just say that? Why would that just be a response? Like, I don't use my brakes because I'm dangerous and I don't care about the people of Detroit when I'm driving around in my fancy car. Rosta five nine. I'm going to get out the way. What's at a stoplight now? For me, maybe for y'all. And I got absinthe in the car. Like what? No, you know, that's called murder.
Like, you shouldn't be allowed to drive.
Some people drive defensively. I drive offensively. I got to get out and score some points.
What do you. Oh, DC Death, Race 2000. Please tell me you saw that phrase. Two thousand. It's an amazing film. We have a have to send you. I'm not sending you a copy because I'm cheap, but you need to do your own due diligence and watch DeFreeze about how glad you are.
You'll remember Cannonball Run.
Oh, I love that movie Cannonball where you think Cannonball Run, the whole series like Cannonball Run on camera to like Burt with Burt Reynolds. So Death Race 2000 came out like and he came out in 1975, definitely 2000. You know, such a is such a great and that's where that phrase scoring points because like old ladies were worth like a thousand points. Babies were worth like something crazy points, and they were just literally ran around just killing them.
Just along with that. As David Carradine I don't know if Sylvester Stallone.
Yeah, he was in it killing them.
However, just like like with their cars, kind of like how you do when you drive your car around the streets of Detroit.
That's how I do when I rap, especially when I rap with those guys. I think they got some got push them around a little bit, let them know who's boss around here.
But how does that work when when you're writing the raps for them?
I thought I was going to be like Ali for you to come talk to. You know, Lupe would not do a song with me, man. He has no respect for me.
You two have never done anything together. No.
You're being disingenuous. That's why I'm not joining you.
COPEMAN You already and I already told him they like yay, yay. He's already you know, he's done. It's a rap. You can't there's no going back. I thought you said it. I immediately went to the group. I was like, guys guess is the family now.
It's like, oh my God, Royce, I'm filling out a fill out the coach. And as soon as I see that we transfer, he's with us.
Like, this is Royce right now. What is it called again? Come on, man. What do you mean what's it called again?
You know what it's called. You've done promo for it.
It doesn't mean that your CO is not important. You're in it so important. That's why you're in it. Yeah, I'm definitely in and out and I want to know who else is in it. What kind of competition do I have? I'm coming in to be on the wheel. We got the call. I know about the Google car. I worried about that. I'm already about to run the show. Think they run it?
Shit is it Chino? Exhale. I got some for his ass. Listen, why? It's not that type of. It's not that, it's not it's not adversarial and it's in its formation in this and it's intentionality. It's meant to be collaborative.
No I mean you're so limited with the detail. So I'm forced to just paint my own picture because it's a cold.
It's a because it's a cold. Like you just can't be like, hey man, we worship the spaghetti monster. And then, you know, you give us all half of your check and then, you know, we'll we'll come and give you a wife. Like, it's not like that.
I remember you talking about very progressive things way before his time is three fourteen. We want to respect your therapy session, brother. This lady is amazing. I'm telling you now I'm going to add her to my life today like a created NBA player. Is it a massage therapist or is it?
Oh, no, I'm a righteous man. What's unrighteous about getting a massage?
I'm a holy man. I don't let women just touch on torture.
Why do you why does it have to be a man? I mean, a woman. It could be a man. Men give great massages. I would never say that I got the craziest man massage story. I don't know if it's fit for human consumption. Podcast consumption.
Oh, do you normally who do you normally tell these stories? Do not tell me you're buying animals just to tell them these bizarre stories.
Maybe I got a house full of mannequins. You know what? I'm getting it in like, you know, I am legend.
You know, it's kind of like that movie legend. Then he have mannequins. That's what I just said.
My dad gave me a massage before he was feeling guilty. Just beat my ass because I was so I was sore from the game and I can't remember what I got in trouble for. So he be my ass. And then he felt bad.
So he ended up massage my leg and it was really nice. Because he had strong you strong hands. That was a great massage story. You know, my dad gave me a massage. Mine is mine is yours, is not yours. Not after giving you a massage is traumatic.
Go ahead. Tell your story. So there's a great massage parlor out here in California, not man working at all. Oh, it's definitely men working in it. Hence why the piece? I don't listen. I don't I don't have anything against the hands that touch with my body, OK? It could be man hands, gorilla hands. You know, as long as they're doing the job, I'm in pain. I need you to help me therapy away.
So anyway, thank you for your candor. You're welcome. I'm only sharing because you shared the story with, you know, your father. And this is just amazing. You tell him you told me too much already. This is amazing. Go ahead. I'm sorry.
It was a great massage parlor out here. It's called a Shanghai massage. Parlors like above the Yoshinoya is like in the super random neighborhood in Koreatown. And so I go there all the time. And the great thing about him is that he like really is titled a foot massage. But they basically wanted a massage in your whole body for like an hour. It's like the best value. But you posed the tip. I didn't know that. It was like, you know, it's only twenty bucks, but you're supposed to tip.
But I'm like, I should have said that charge more next time. But anyway, this time I went in there to get like my back, done some messing up my back and normally I get like a woman. But this time it was a guy. And I really have a I have an issue like laying face down, like the massage table. Face pillow doesn't work for me. Like, it chokes the shit out of me, honestly. So I find myself struggling, like when I'm lying face down.
So anyway, the guy has me on the table, face down head is in the circle pillow, whole thing. Right. And he's standing in front of me massaging, you know, my back. Right. He's not like on the side, like he's in front on the back. And because of his stature, his penis is coming into contact with the top of my skull every time. What is he naked?
Why is he doing this or why? Why would he be naked? I don't I'm confused.
No, no, he's not. Nhé Well, what type of massages are you getting? Like, what are you used to? I'm letting you know right now.
We went from zero to five hundred already. This is all bad already.
I've just left, but now it's not all bad. But so as he's massaging my back, you know, I'm under the sheet, you know, they're doing the full thing.
But his dick is just ramming into the top of my head this whole time. I'm just sitting here like, this is fucking ridiculous.
This was this was like you you came to a point in life right here. This is like a crossroad. This is a crossroads.
This Grohmann, me, you know, and apparently grown man him as well. How do you like, for lack of a better term, how to handle that part?
I mean, off top, I just had to just kind of what was I going to do? And my back hurt, I guess this what it takes to get my back together and you can't, like, really move just as I'm trying to, like, I just had to take it, man. I had to take it for that, for that session. Like that piece where they were. They have to stand in front of you. This set you back.
This better be fucking scoliosis we talk about. Really. They got my back, which I do have some back problems from time to time, and but it was like I got some back problem from sleeping on the couch, none of which are worth putting in my face.
Well, it wasn't in my face. First of all, it wasn't my face.
It was the top of my head in the forehead, not my forehead. Because you face down like that. That's what I tried to paint the image for you. So, you know, and she understood the angles because he was kind of short, like he was taller then, you know, would have been like, you know, you off the table.
But you should talk to somebody about this, like a therapist. This could be trauma. I had a barber. His name was Lonzo. I went to high school with excellent barber, excellent barber, real fit guy. Used to be on the football team so he didn't wear a shirt a lot. And like once you start cutting my hair, I came to the realization that he doesn't wear drawers either. So he used to wear like blue jeans, shorts when he was in shorts, weightiest and blue jean cut out.
Yeah. Yeah. Because he cut. I'm sorry. I forgot to tell you how he cut and he used to cut in his basement. We were like high school in his basement. He wasn't in the shop. Yeah. He got in the shop.
Now do you know this is, this is already worse than my story. My guy was fully dressed. He wasn't in his basement. It was in an establishment. Right. And it was stuck in a place because a guy with no shirt and no to go on, it wasn't prolonged. It was just one part of the massage in a position that had to be taken.
You got your basement. You got to clarify, OK, you're right. You right. You know what you write. Continue. I'ma let you finish.
I got too much respect. I got too much respect for you to hear you back pedaling like that, man.
You know, I don't that's why I said I own that. I own that whole head. Fucking that that occurred.
It's fucking you. You know, a top tier is ridiculous. You out here. Listen, you're right. So let's do it.
You cut my hair like you never wore a shirt and he never wore it. Yeah. Blue jeans, shorts on and never wore dress. And I think it was because he was in shape. So he wanted to show off his obliques and shit. And I didn't realize like his cry for attention to show us his obliques and shit, that his cry for attention would come crashing into my desire to get a fucking haircut. What happened was when he would turn the chair around in certain positions.
As soon as I turn around, I'm too close in proximity to his meat, you know. I mean, like, you know, sometimes they accidentally rub up against you. Like, I don't want to feel your meat on my arm. I'm never coming back here again, ever. And I'm possibly about to get some help talk to somebody about this so I can only imagine what you went through.
No, that's completely different. What you just explained. That is trauma, right? You have somebody actively trying to put meat on.
You know, you are actively trying. He when you went actively trying to try and with one layer, one layer of cloth betwixt he and said, meet my guy. Actually, he was fully dressed. I'm sure he had no underwear, you know, like it was it would have been layers.
My guy was there just to give me a haircut, bro. Your guy was there to do something he shouldn't have been doing any fucking way.
But you had a guy there with no shoes on, cut off jean shorts, no shirt.
I say I say to wear shoes. He wore shoes. You know where I draw. You didn't wear underwear or shirt, but he was just there to cut hair, bro. Your guy was there to massage you.
Obviously you were getting massage. But look, I didn't get traumatized from I just shared this story because you brought the story of your dad giving you a massage. I'm like, OK, who I feel comfortable now expressing.
You never know how it affects you. Clearly it has the effect. So you were a teenager when this happened? I was still in high school. Right. And then you went on to drive just all of a sudden. Now you want to drink like. Absolutely. And then it just builds into.
So you that happen to you when you were adolescent? This happened to me and I was grown man.
It's like I'm desensitized. What are you desensitized to exactly?
I mean, like penises, bro. Like I mean, people got penises.
They might pop out, they might not you know, you might be in the Japanese bath and too fat, naked dude, walk in and sit down and you just lie. Well, you know, we go looking for a place that's our show for the week. If you like what you heard, be sure to subscribe or follow us. Leave us a review and tell your friends to listen to their banro shows the production of say what media.
It's recorded and mixed by. Clyde Jennings. Our head writer is Lauren Sloat. I'm Tom Frank. And our theme music is by who else?
Lupe Fiasco writes the five Nat.