Transcribe your podcast
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To learn more, visit W-W both dotcom. What's up guys.

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Vologda views. Jaysus currently in the bathroom right now so I won't let EYLEA take over.

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Illia I guys did you know that the inventor of the Frisbee was cremated and made into a Frisbee.

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Get the fuck out. Get the fuck out of here. I swear to God. Wow. Are you being serious. Yeah.

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So what do you want to be cremated into a ball game. Where is that serious. Yeah, I can't. Where's the Frisbee now? I don't know.

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You know, Wal-Mart just fine. Wow. You're already a better co-host. And Jason, I really enjoy music.

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It's funny, every time somebody has a story here, like people get really excited, like Illia texted all of us and he goes, you guys won't fucking believe what happened.

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Like, I can't even hype this up enough. You will not believe what happened. And then, like, we're like, what happened when we're all texting and back? And then he doesn't respond.

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And then he gets here and he goes, you guys will not fucking look again.

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Same thing. And then and then what is it? He's like like I said before the podcast, it's just funny that like like when people have something exciting here, they don't share it because they have to share that to save for this moment. OK, go before I share my story. We've been waiting for this for three days into this sex dungeon and I couldn't tell you for a week.

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Yeah, that's funny. Before I share my story, I was just thinking like I had this thought earlier today, my ex-girlfriend, my past girlfriend, her new boyfriend is six five.

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Oh, damn. I like he's a tall motherfucker. I was always curious why your girlfriend was with you. He towers over me, bro.

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I kind of agree. Yeah, right. Yeah, that's that's what that's why I was always so happy.

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That relationship. Hurtful thing to say. No it's not. She's so she's so tall. Oh she is. How tall. Five eight. Yeah she's five eight. That's like that's really tall.

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Five seven or something like that. No she was tall. She's an inch taller than he was tall in heels.

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No she was just a really funny combo with her. No. Yeah. Yeah.

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She whenever we go to homecoming I always feel like four inches shorter than her like from or whatever. Sorry. I didn't mean, I didn't mean that. Yeah. I mean I don't know why she was dating you. Yeah he did ok though. No I didn't look at it.

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I go, oh you say so I have this DMV guy that somehow miraculously gets me to the front of the line by having like people wait there from like three a.m. like he puts people line at three a.m. and then when we get there, we pretty much switch places. Right?

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Right. So he lets you skip the line and the DMV is an ah, fuck. It's like another level.

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So I pull up knowing that this guy is going to bring me to the front of the line. So I'm already expecting that people are going to give me dirty looks. Right. These two people that were behind us that like were there since fucking three a.m. go batshit crazy.

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I know that shit. No racino. First guy, he looks like he's on fucking crack. He's so mad. He's like he's like, yo, yo, you guys here three m oh were you guys here at AM. And like he starts getting backed up by this other other groza. Yeah. Did you pay them to come here. The guy who brought me there starts defending us.

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He's like, yeah I, we were here at three am, I have a video, he starts explaining all this and the guy goes, no, no, I'm going to shed your blood. I want to show I'm wearing a gun.

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What is he says he goes, I'm going to shed your blood, starts pacing back and forth. I'm going to shed your blood. I'm going to do it right now. I'm going to do in front of everybody. Yeah. Oh, I swear to God.

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So he he's he is so livid. He's like, I'm going to shed your blood right now.

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I'm like, oh my God, this is crazy. But then again, it is the DMV in the movie that that shit your blood. And I'm speechless. I'm like, what the fuck's going on? You know?

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And so, like, he, like, kind of calms down. Whatever the fucking DMV person comes over, like talks to him, he starts bitching at the DMV person, like, I'm so like I'm in the middle of all this. I'm like, I don't know what the fuck to do. There's people screaming. The fucking security guard is like yelling at another person. He's like, stop pushing me. I'm like, bro, I'm in a movie.

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Like, This is insane. Oh, no.

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There's like four or five more people that come up and, like, make a scene about us being there, like literally like every other person that saw that scene started making a scene like.

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Yeah, and he's trying to like he's trying to like soothing, smooth things over with, like the people as they go.

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And his partner, that's like they're helping him. I can seem like fifteen feet away. He's standing there in the corner, like with his arms crossed and he makes he makes this he makes his signal to to the guy who brought and he goes, Yeah.

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Like the cut signal, like, stop talking to me because it's like he's trying to smooth things over, but like it's not working.

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These people are just like not listening to like what he has to say, your hand underneath your chin and going right.

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It don't cut it. Cut it. Yeah.

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You just did the signal and forgot that it was an audio podcast or. Oh yeah.

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Anyways, um, I've never felt that uncomfortable in my fucking life. Right. And thank God I had a fucking mask on because like I was I was hiding my green or like my laughter in.

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But it was so, so funny what happened. After a long story short, the man died.

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A long story short, the manager of the DMV comes out.

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He knows the guy who, like, brought me in or whatever. Yeah. And they, like talk and they smooth things out.

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Basically, the people that were all mad, like when ahead. And so we ended up going after, like all the pissed off people, one of the funniest moments this year was Dana got us all together to watch except it. You remember this? Yes. And and we were going to watch it one night, but I couldn't.

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Or do we not talk about this? And I couldn't stay stay. I was like, I'm like, put it. I'm like, put it on and I'll watch the first 15 minutes. I'm like, no, no, you got to watch the whole thing. And that is a firm believer in that too. She's like, no, no, no, no, we got to wait. We all watched together. And so then we watched it, right?

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Yeah. It was pretty fun. It's good movie. It's such a good movie. And then, you know, it's at the very end it during Justin Long. And I wanted to get up many times during the movie because I didn't think it was that great. You said it was as good as Superbad. It's a really good movie. It's it's it's good. It's fine. It's fine. It's one of the best movies. If I wasn't here with you guys watching it, I might not watch.

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OK, but and what happened and right during Justin long speech and the very accepted as a movie where these kids start their own college.

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Yeah.

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And and I'm not going to spoil for the 20 year old movie I spoil for you guys, but at the end they get busted and the main character is now in court and he has to give the speech to why their college is a real college and why they should become a real college. It should be accredited like a real college. This is the best part of the entire movie, the most climactic moment. The only reason to watch the entire movie is for this moment where fucking they're finally going to win.

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They're going to win. They're going to go win these losers. Yeah, that couldn't get into real college are finally going to be accepted into this fake college that they made in an average movie.

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This is one of the this is the best part of the movie. I would love this part of them. It's a big part of the it's a big part. And then what happened?

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Go tell everybody what happened right in the middle of this beach area. Just gets up and just walks out of the room, gets up and gets up and leaves and I go, where are you going? And first he was walking towards the kitchen and where are you going? And he stops and then he goes to his room. And then I pause it. I pause the movie I just got of anger. I'm like, what the fuck is going on as the movie?

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And I hear him on the toilet in his room. So I'm like, what's going on? He flushes. He's washing his hands, like checking himself out on the mirror. It takes a long time for him to come back out and then he's walking. When he comes out, he walks over to the kitchen. Now he's going back to the kitchen. And I'm like, dude, what the fuck are you doing? I was so angry. And he looks at me like, Why?

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And I'm like, Are you fucking serious? And then David, they started arguing and Dave was like, I'm not friends with you anymore. It was literally like, I'm not going to talk to you ever again. I just I said, your movie laws are interesting.

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Like, no, I agree with his laws. You do. I those I totally agree. I was just high for the tenth fucking time. What do you not understand? I wasn't thinking about the movie. I was thinking about I want to take a piss and go to the fucking kitchen to eat some snacks. It just doesn't make. What do you not understand about that? If I'm right, it doesn't make sense is that you sat here for an hour and 40 minutes and honestly, he was enjoying the movie.

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He was laughing by laughing at parts of the movie. Fuck you, leave the poor part of it. How do you do that? And then I go and then I go to him. EYLEA, I can't trust you with anything anymore. That's because I go because I go like that's when you cross the line and that's when I got mad.

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No, because fuck you because I'm one of the most important qualities in my friends is that I trust them with choices. When I'm making videos or making contact and ask them, I'm like, is this funny? Do you enjoy this? Do you appreciate this?

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You obviously didn't. Yeah, I'm not up in the middle of that. And if Ilya can't, like, recognize a good movie like that when it's happening, that I don't know if I could trust him to watch my videos and tell me if it's good or bad video. OK, then don't show me your videos. Your videos are way better than excepted. Yeah, fuck no, it's not like that. Don't show me your fucking videos then. What do you want me to tell you?

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I was fucking high. I wanted to take a piss. Fuck you. I have a fucking yes during the best and I admit that you don't fuck what you nutter. I admit that I was wrong but I was high. I would never do that if I was sober. You mean I've never heard anybody become an idiot when they're high. If I, if I were here with other people. That's what did you say.

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He said he's never heard of anyone becoming an idiot when they're high, which is like pretty much what happens.

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You just kind of become like, OK, time out. Yeah, that's a statement that I mean, I take it we're all idiots. No, but that was just a very, very bizarre moment, man.

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I mean, I don't think that he was paying attention, but like, I think that he would look up, engage in a scene, think it was funny, and then completely forget that it happened.

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I was so angry and I was like looking around the room to see who was agreeing with me here, because I was like, there's no fucking way I'm on my own. I locked eyes with Natalie and I could see, like, there's a little bit of like a grievance with her.

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And I was like, oh, thank God. Thank God I'm not the only one here that cares about respecting a film. And it's just funny. It could have been any other moment, but it was the moment. It was the moment.

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But it made no sense. And I'm so I'm not I don't know anybody like you.

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This is why I hate watching movies with people. Like, I'll be hanging out with somebody, they'll be like, oh, let's watch the movie. I like, fuck that. Like we're not watching any movie that I love unless you're you're unless you sign a piece of paper right now that says you're going to watch every second of it. I'm so anal about. I hate it.

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It's it's like if if in your scenario, in your case, if you took someone to like a stand up show and they left like in the middle of the show, like doing a great joke that's different completely.

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Oh, it's something you like.

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I'm torn about it on the one hand. No, I think it's cute that you guys have that law like I like it. And on the other hand, I'm also like, if someone got up and walked, I was like, I guess they didn't like it. I mean, you know, you didn't make the movie.

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Yeah. But I think the one thing it was your movie like the movie about you, bro. You know how much it means to me to show people things I fucking love, showing people things like it's like my biggest thing. I love people's reactions and I love like showing people things for the first time, I promise you, like, Jay was good. It wasn't as good as Superbad like you said. It was as good as Superbad. I think it's one of those movies that's like Superbad.

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I think you saw it like at a time in your life and that you like.

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Really? Yes, 100 percent. Yeah. It's definitely like for me. Like I have that. Yeah. But but like but I also I've brought this up before, like when we go to restaurants that I don't like the restaurant but you like the restaurant, everyone else likes the restaurant. Then the next week I'll bring people to that restaurant just because I like seeing people's reactions, because I know other people like the restaurant, like I'm just obsessed with people's reactions to things.

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I love it like whether it's whether I'm delivering good news or bad news. I love delivering. It is my favorite thing. And this is why this was so important to me for him to watch the best moment of this insane listen and accept. Listen to me.

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I promise you from the bottom of my heart, if I was sober, I would have sat through that fucking dumb ass movie, even if Borkan hated it, because I wanted to leave so many times during the movie and go home and go to sleep.

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You did. But I knew I was like, if I leave, it's going to be like a breach of trust.

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Oh, and also and also the first time we were going to watch Accepted, Jay was like Jay with everybody wanted to watch accepted and Jay was over and Jay was like, Jerzyk, yeah, throw it on. But I'm going to leave in like twenty minutes. And I was like, oh OK, we're not going to watch it.

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Then we'll watch it another time. Remember, that's what I said. So then I waited two weeks and then we watched it again when we were all ready to watch a movie and thank God you didn't leave.

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But who knew that one of my closest friends would backstab me either the moment I was I listen, I understand that I'm overreacting a little bit. I do. But it just it really did hurt me.

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Yeah, well, it's good you're passionate. I like it. I admire it. And your friend Ilya is in it. You guys continue supporting restaurants in your community safely.

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[00:14:42]

We had to take photos this week for the podcast. Dave and I, it it was just fucking the worst.

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Oh yeah.

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It was the worst. Big changes coming to the podcast. Oh, what are you what are you going to say? What are about to announce? I'm eager to hear what you would say.

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No, nothing I don't like. It's not like you're such a tease. Why big changes coming to the podcast. Never mind.

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What are the big changes made out or placing me with Eliahu who can't hold the mike up to his face?

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That that Mike, we have to tape that fucking Mike to his chest. So you just kind of funny.

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That's really funny. Or like headgear with a mike that drops down in front of his nose.

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Now we're about to take the podcast more seriously. If you haven't noticed the last couple episodes. We haven't noticed.

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Jarobi just saw this podcast for a lot of money and David read the article. But if he finally is going to listen to us, if you haven't noticed, the last two podcasts have been a lot more attentive. And I've been here and I've been contributing to stories a lot more than I normally would. Yeah.

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And that's because I'm more in it now than ever before.

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This is Detective. Yeah. You're wrapped in five blankets. Yeah, but I've been listening to all your stories.

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I just listen to that bullshit shit about why I want to get something going, you motherfucker. I know it wasn't great, but I thought you could add something that was good.

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The citizen app is amazing, man.

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I'm happy for your son, Jay. You should try my pasta.

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Oh, I wanted to try your pasta. These two fucking Trudgill. Denise, I really know and I haven't tried Yemeni's.

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You haven't had it yet. Where is it? Not tonight, unless Julia will eat it tonight. I can't eat until like September 4th because socks and socks, you literally make all of us suffer such a cult around here.

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I love it.

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I walked out on accepted Illia 40 lashings.

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You know how David always, like, normally people talk shit behind your back, right? Yeah.

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Oh, yeah. This is a really weird observation. Shehab You know how David, he like he'll he'll be known to you. He'll be mean to you in person, but then he'll like praise you behind your back like you won't be there. Like he'll say he's a great guy. I freakin love Jason. He's awesome. But then when you're here he's like you get the fuck out of here.

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Do you. I know. And I've noticed it so much.

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So when he's nice to people like if he's ever nice to me, I'm like, oh, is this good or is it bad? I'm like worried. And I'm like, so now I'm so used to him being mean to you that I'm like, OK. I hope that at least when I'm not there, maybe he's like saying things, but I don't know that all this and I'll never know. But so when he is nice or he says one thing that isn't an insult, I'm like, oh fuck.

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Like is he going to like when I leave the room he's going to be like, how fucking fucking sock she's so fucking annoying or something. It's like so hard to know because it's like do does he like her? Does he not like you?

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You know, if you he's being mean to you that means he likes you.

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That means I like you the most. But then if he's being nice to you, that doesn't mean he fucking loves me. Now that has that now because I'm so mean to you, Julie.

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He's horrible. Oh, come on. Yeah, he definitely loves you the way you want to fuck me with a fucking mike. And it's so true though.

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He's not here. He's like, fucking jerk him off.

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And like it's like he's the best person in the world. Really scary.

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That is the way I communicate with you guys. But I do check in from time to time. Like with Ali. I'll go, hey, man. Like, oh, you double checked.

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I just went I just went into your room the other day. I was like, is the Short-Staffed really bothering you?

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Are you with me for a tick tock to show twenty million people. I haven't posted it yet.

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You know what? I don't give me my big sun to talk.

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Joe always says that like he'll he'll say to me, Joe, come over my house and and he'll just kind of like stand around sometimes. And I'm like, oh, he just wants to hang out. OK, that's cool. And then he'll he'll he'll turn around and I'll go. You think David will get rid of us.

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You know what I always say. Well, I go now. He needs us.

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You're ready. You asked to have sex with me yesterday on purpose.

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We. What was the guy that thought. Oh yeah.

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That's your friend right here. OK, I just wanted to go home during that night and people thought that we were going to go home together.

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I just asked we went to dinner the other night with a group of friends at a restaurant and the whole day pretty much. Did you ever talk about horny? The guys really like?

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I've never felt this horny in my whole entire life. And I'm sure recreation's but the whole day, just talking about it.

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And then at dinner, he was sitting next to our other single male friend and they were like, he's nice.

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OK, super sweet guy. Right?

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Straight. Yes, straight. OK. And I mean, so we thought. Right, I mean, he is not.

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He is. Oh my God. Stop. But basically like then the whole night there at dinner just like giggling and like laughing and like just talking to one on one to each other. And then at the end of the night Reggie was like, I want to go home or something like that.

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I just wanted to go home. And then he was like, Oh, I'll take you.

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And you know how it's like usually it's like, oh, I'll take you in. Like, OK, let's go with my car on the way there.

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Like that was the vibe. Wow. That is I did not get that vibe at all. Everybody at the table got it. And then when they left, my two girlfriends that were in town were like, So your friend and Reggie, are they like your friends for sure.

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Like, right. Right. And I was like, oh, he's he's a hundred percent straight.

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And they're like, oh, no, honey. Like, they are definitely hooking up. And I was like, you guys are crazy. But they didn't hook up.

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But it was no, no. I don't know if it didn't work. That's something I will never know. What can I say before I forget about that?

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She said, oh, you're just the right amount of stupid being like you're not stupid, but you're like on on a lot of things.

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Let me make one thing very fucking shit with all of you.

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I'm going to fucking run you guys in five years. I am not dumb.

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That's the one thing that I'm not you know, you're not just. Oh, just I'm also a tub of fucking mayo, which I'm not so.

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Well, you're definitely not on top of me, but like you're good at you're good at like money and stocks. There's so many things that your I could learn like so much from. You don't mean like the world that you guys live in. Yeah, exactly.

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That's all it is like hey mama shed some blood, is about to shed some blood, shed some blood right now.

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Stayed over David's bed today and say that shed some blood, bro. My buddy Jay, prehistoric pets, he's like a snake guy. And he texted me like at nine thirty at night. And he's like, hey, man, I'm in the area finishing a job, doing the snake for any reason. I was like, OK, if I come by a tick tock, I'll put it in the newsroom. And then he's like, I'm five minutes away, I'll see you.

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And I was a great so go out to the driveway to wait for him. And as he's pulling up, I like signal I'm in to like pull into my driveway or whatever. And I'm like, oh, I think it's assistance driving or something and it's time to pull in. But it's too fucking random. Girls just like coming to see my house and I just signal them to come into my driveway and I look right in the car. I'm like, oh fuck.

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And they're like, hi, I'm so sorry. We'll just back out now. And then they back their car out and they're having like a hard time backing their car out of my driveway. And they're like, can you just help us get out of here?

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Can we back in again? So we go back out. I was like, it's fine.

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Like it was so awkward because, like, it I didn't want to, like, be like, what the fuck are you doing here? Because I just invited them in and then also like, why are they there? Like, why are they outside my house. But yeah. But then he came by and we put the snake in the room and it's so fucking funny.

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God, I love that guy. Yeah. Jurisdiction's it's just like, you know, he's like my age. He's just like so passionate about animals. And then he just any time you get something good he just goes living the dream.

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I love it.

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He is so optimistic on life. I was talking to Phineas and he goes, he goes, I really like your podcast.

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And my reaction was really he goes and he goes, I don't know why, but anybody I compliment ever on their podcast, their initial reaction is always really. Yeah. Like, it's such a funny thing. You just sit here and talk. Yeah. I think you're talking to your friend. Yeah.

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He was saying he's like everybody like is like almost embarrassed of their podcast and it's like the one creative like art form that like no one is confident in. Yeah. Like that's like a really funny observation that he is a podcast.

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Right. He has a podcast with Klaudia that kids listen to it. Oh yeah. Yeah. But I've never heard of.

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Yeah I was talking, I was talking to it, I was talking to him about why you are and, and you know how you wanted him to like come and help Wyatt with his music or whatever. Yeah. Yeah. He listen to the podcast or we talked about how like why how why react to all of our tree. Yeah. And he was like, I'm down to come help Wyatt, but please don't make me surprised. It wasn't a surprise.

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It was supposed to be a Zoome call. No, I know. I don't know. Is that what he said? No. No, he didn't say that. No, he didn't say that. But I just want to make sure Wyatt knows I'm about to call him. I don't like because he didn't want to feel the pressure of there being a surprise.

[00:23:47]

Yeah. And that's why I disappoint him. Yeah.

[00:23:49]

And all of a sudden he was like he was like, just let y know, but I'm going to call him fucking schedule it and whatever, pencil me and put it in its fucking calendar.

[00:23:58]

But I'm going to call him because I don't want it to be a surprise.

[00:24:02]

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[00:25:02]

Jaded, you know how. OK, so Quentin Tarantino and Christopher Nolan, two of my favorite directors, they shoot on film, right? That's like their thing. Do you know how like they put movies together? I had no fucking idea. So Christopher Nolan will edit the movie, will edit the movie on his computer like I did the movie, like on his editing software. And then when he has it, he'll go to the film, he'll take a razor and he'll cut the film in the places and he'll glue them back together.

[00:25:30]

And that's how you do it. And then Quentin Tarantino, never even ghost is fucking computer. He just cuts them together. He just cuts the film together. Looks at how he looks at the fucking ready. Really?

[00:25:40]

Yeah. He looks at the real like he looks at the thing the looks seriously old fashioned, like 1930's shit. Yeah. And he no way. And he puts the frames together like just by bike by fucking taping it together. How fucking insane. Can't be. Yes. That's how he does it. No, no there's no fucking way.

[00:25:57]

Then what's the why are their editors then.

[00:25:59]

There's editors on all those films, especially Christopher Nolan films which are like have so much CGI and so much. Yeah but I know Nolan films do not have CGI. Wait a minute.

[00:26:09]

We're talking about like what about the Leonardo DiCaprio movie Inception. Inception. No, he builds those sets. For real, those are real sets of things, you know, you know, I believe it it's like one of those things that like like if you're a genius, like you just do something crazy like that, like Elon Musk will, he'll he'll talk to like all interviewees won't he won't he won't allow anybody to, like, interview anybody but himself.

[00:26:32]

I don't even think speaking about being crazy, it's the process of working with film, I guess. Right. Yes. The other way to do it.

[00:26:39]

You work with film and that's that's where the phrase cut comes from. I didn't know. I just found that out today.

[00:26:43]

When you say when you yell cut, it's because you're literally cutting the film and then you're taping.

[00:26:48]

I'm trying to think about the last Quentin Tarantino movie that we saw and how he could do that. But I guess it does make sense. I guess it's just the sound matches up and then that's it. Yeah.

[00:26:56]

And there is this other guy. There's this other guy who he shot on a camera that is in record audio. So what he would do is he learn sign language and he learned how to read lips so he would cut the pieces together of the film and then he'd know the parts based on how the lips are moving.

[00:27:12]

And then he'd have the actors come in later and dub it over their actual voices, really, which are actors that I don't I don't remember his name or his name.

[00:27:20]

But yeah, bromides are flooded with girls saying they know how to get through airports. Oh, me too.

[00:27:30]

Me too. I'm a five to Latina girl and I will definitely walk in front of David. Yeah.

[00:27:38]

Last podcast, I said I want to go a walk in front of me and take charge in airport and command the way and a girl that's under fire for to Latino or whatever. And yeah, all my dreams are like I would definitely walk in front of you at the airport. And at first I didn't know what was going on. And then immediately after I thought, how do these people know so much about me? But then I realize it's the girls that that I that I said that I would like to wait you at rollerblading today.

[00:28:04]

You went rollerblading. How to go rollerblading was great. We went to Santa Monica, bro.

[00:28:10]

There were so many people. The beach was fucking. I was at the beach this morning. I know.

[00:28:16]

Packed like that fucking thing on there because I would have really popped, man. It was fucking. There's so many people there. I got almost knife this morning in Santa Monica, goods running down in Santa Monica. There's a guy standing there with a knife and he's just looking at me. So then I was walking and and then I started to run again and they go, Yeah, you better run like that.

[00:28:38]

And I'm like, Oh, shit. He said that to you? Yeah. What did you say? Bag ten in the morning. He's got a knife. Me. It's anything, it's, it's tough.

[00:28:46]

And you know how he runs. He runs like it's the worst. Yeah.

[00:28:49]

But you really think if you would have stopped and you would've been like what are you going to do about a pussy like you camping knife to you.

[00:28:54]

Yes, not necessarily. No, I don't want to find out right away. Not necessarily. He might have just been like, fuck you or hit me or something.

[00:29:02]

It was weird in front of, like a really, really nice hotel that I got married in, like a nice area that I'm like always very like.

[00:29:09]

And we'll see like a homeless guy. I know. Just like crazy fuck. Just like there's just tons of crazy folks down there now this crazy guy with a knife and he said, you better on.

[00:29:17]

Yeah. Then you should take me as protection next time. Oh yeah. Yeah. I didn't know you were tough. Well I know I could just run faster than you. I had to get help immediately.

[00:29:26]

OK, that doesn't sound like that's going to work because like you're going to take off and I'm going to get stabbed. I feel like, Jason, you take a hit. Why? I could take a lot of pain joke. Really.

[00:29:34]

I feel like if someone hit him in the face, he'd get back up pretty quick. No fucking way. Yeah. Oh, you don't think so?

[00:29:40]

I think so. I'll see you in the face tomorrow. Two o'clock. I think you want to see. I think you underestimate Jason's like manliness. Take a hit from home for me. Yeah. He'd be able to go from anybody. From anybody, any Mike Tyson come. So you fuck.

[00:29:53]

I'm saying like the average person who can take a hit from average person, meaning I like me if I hit him.

[00:29:57]

Well, you're not average or below. You're below average or five foot eight like you're saying like like a regular tall guy. That's tall, right? Yeah. OK, you ever hit him in the face?

[00:30:05]

No, but I want to hit them and fuck me to vote. No fucking way. Have you ever.

[00:30:10]

Obviously honestly. Honestly. Yeah. If we had glove's I beat the shit out of you like I wouldn't really hit you if we had laughs.

[00:30:16]

Yeah. Why would I put gloves on my ass kicked. Well I don't know. No I. Yeah, you could totally beat the shit out, man. Have you ever been hit in the face. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

[00:30:25]

I thought I got punched in the face. When did you get punched in the face. Oh, I got punched. I got punched in the face too. When yours. There's not as bad as mine.

[00:30:33]

Oh the ambulance came for my fucking girl. Yeah. I hear all the ambulances to come and get her. Not because I kicked her ass because she was on drugs. I wasn't I wasn't around for that night. Oh, you weren't there. But I heard you got your ass beat by a girl. That's my ass. The girl punch. She was on drugs. I shined my flashlight on her on accident. Yeah, because I was filming. I was walking and she was she just turned the flashlight on me and she fucking came and she socked me in the eye or sorry.

[00:31:01]

In the mouth. In the mouth. In the mouth. So my mouth was in my mouth was a little bloody like like the smallest amount of blood.

[00:31:06]

But like I ran with it. Right. And I was like, oh my God, because I was blogging.

[00:31:11]

So I was like really dramatic. And then we followed her because she was obvious. On drugs and juice and the shoes hopping into people's backyards and fighting random people, and then the paramedics came and the paramedics had to tie her down to the chair because she was punching the paramedics. When they take her, she was like on bath salts or something. I've talked about a story. That's why I'm asking me to it so quickly. But, yeah, that was the one time I got in a fire.

[00:31:33]

You know, I always wonder, like that time I got sucker punched if David didn't have a camera in his hands, would he have, like, stood up for me? No, I will never get in a fight.

[00:31:42]

But I fucking told you this. When did you get sucker punched at Virgin Hills days at the carnival.

[00:31:49]

What year was this like two years ago. Really fucking hit you.

[00:31:52]

Some guy, some random guy. Some random guy. What happened? My friend and I were driving out of the parking lot and like this random guys are sort of like thrown like racial slurs at my friend. So I got out of the car to confront him. Oh, boy. And his buddy out of fucking nowhere comes behind me and hits me right in the fucking eye every Hill's days the rest of the time of the year.

[00:32:14]

Yeah, bro. And nobody like that. Nobody backed me. It was like Sadhguru out there. It was like, you know, like it's funny because I was like a gang member, but nobody banged me back, me up, nobody.

[00:32:24]

And I was like because it was it was a stupid fight to start, you know, I didn't start the fight. Yes, you did. You got out of the car and you said, what's your story?

[00:32:31]

You little you little. These kids, these kids were looking for a fight and you were just fucking destroyed it up enough to go and fight these kids. That's all. They all they wanted was a fight. They were like screaming into our window.

[00:32:44]

And then Aleah had to put it in park and go what you fuck you say. And then it's on like Scooby Doo, one of the kids. And when one of the kids backed away illegal, I thought it was just walking back to the car and then you get sucker punched and it all ended after the one punch. Yeah. Like it was over. But I don't know why he had to go out there and fucking I don't know why any president, any fight.

[00:33:09]

I was getting a lot more fights if I didn't have a bad shoulder. That's the most that's the dumbest thing I've ever heard. The guy got a broken knocked the other shoulder out. I totally would. For what reason. What does it do for you?

[00:33:22]

Nothing. I just I would like pick fights, but like I'd be more like inclined to be aggressive.

[00:33:29]

That sounds like you'd be more inclined to pick fights. I don't know.

[00:33:33]

I got punched in the face by a girl.

[00:33:36]

What would you do if I didn't do anything?

[00:33:42]

It was kind of like your situation. You were and you know, she was on something. It's actually a crazy story. And why did you choose you? Were you talking to somebody? No, I like was in New York.

[00:33:55]

In Tribeca midday. It was like fucking five p.m. broad daylight. I get into an Uber and this girl comes running in front of the car. She's in a white shirt covered in blood, no pants scene out of a movie. Me watching this for you every night, I'm like, she's been raped. So I open the door and I'm like, oh, my God, are you OK?

[00:34:11]

And she looks at me and she comes into the car, lunges and punches me in the face. I think I'm wearing a white blazer and then my white blazer is covered in this girl's blood or whoever's blood she's covered in. Oh, my God, I'm in like shock.

[00:34:24]

And the uber driver proceeds to get out, clean his window from the blood instead of fucking driving away. And I'm in the car and I'm like, what the fuck is going on? And then she starts running down the street. I like, see, I call my mom when I was like I just got punched in the face by this crazy woman, like, I know what's going on or whatever. And I was on citizenship. And that's how I found out after because I was like, I'm getting the fuck out of here.

[00:34:45]

I'm not waiting for the cops. And then I went on citizen. It was like woman assaulted. I'm like, that's me.

[00:34:49]

And I sent tell my friends and I was like, Yo, I'm famous. I was I want to snap. And I never knew what to say. I am. I like followed up.

[00:34:59]

I like called the precinct and everything because I was so curious about what happened to this woman because I was like either she saw something because she was in like pure shock. She wasn't like homeless or anything. She was like twenty five Asian girl, like look super young, looked like she had like run out of her apartment.

[00:35:13]

She just punched you as punch me in the face out of nowhere.

[00:35:16]

I had like a pretty bruised nose. It's a really fucked up way. Did she say anything when she punched. You know, she did absolutely nothing. And then I was like, what the fuck? And she just was silent and ran away. I liked how you were trying to help her. I know. And then, you know, what happened is a beautiful story.

[00:35:29]

I like Ellison, so. Oh, no, she was assaulted. Let me open the door and then boom and literally the next day go to work. And I worked for Casey and I called Casey the story. And Casey goes, and what did you learn from this?

[00:35:42]

And I like I don't know, he goes, no, help people like.

[00:35:48]

OK, then that's crazy. Is insane. Ella, do you think you kicked kick my ass?

[00:35:52]

Yeah, I think I also think that Addison Reagan kick your ass. No way. Yeah. You should see your shoe box. Yeah.

[00:35:58]

I don't think Addison, first of all, with punches, it's a different story. I use my feet so I'd kick. Right.

[00:36:05]

I understand. But kicking I think I could kick your ass. It sucks that it's a lose lose. How why are you saying things out loud.

[00:36:11]

Because we're talking about. No, you're you're only kicking. It's not. Like, we will never know, like like it would be so you're talking to all parties in the face, like it would be so cool, like tomorrow, like Ellyson, like full gear and like you're in full gear and it's like a real fight.

[00:36:28]

I mean, honestly, I could kick your fucking ass. You could kick my ass. But I also think I could kick your ass.

[00:36:34]

What do you mean? Like, if I'm drunk and I'm blind, like, what happens? You gouge my eyes out and you have three guys holding me down.

[00:36:39]

Oh, I think I mean, you're a very small person. Did you see your hit?

[00:36:44]

I believe I believe we saw a video. No, I believe literally like one, two. But I could probably even, like, push you to a wall, you know what I mean? Like what we do that we do that in boxing. Do that like, you know, some like how it works. People like come at you and you have to, like, push them back.

[00:36:59]

Are you grabbing my neck right now? Listen, no, I think I think in the situation that I needed to get out of it, I would probably be able to kick your ass and get out of it. But if I wasn't, like, prepared, yeah, you could kick, man.

[00:37:14]

I think if I was napping, if I was sleeping and you walked in the door, where's David? And I kick his ass and Iliya quickly comes to my room and goes, you know, I was here to kick your ass and I had a little time to prepare. I think I'd be able to fucking kick your ass. You'd come in, you throw the first punch at me. I think you were in the stomach. I think you right.

[00:37:33]

I kick you in the balls immediately. I don't have balls. It's also true.

[00:37:41]

I don't know. Jay, honestly. Who do you think who did he would win? I don't know. I saw her hitting the other day. I think she might just just punch you out. I think I could give you one. I think she might not.

[00:37:50]

You know, I also don't think that you'd be coordinated effort to land hit a kick.

[00:37:54]

I can I punch up on the punch. Yeah. I don't I've never punched in my life. I'm not good. I just think I could give you one punch in the face and I'd knock you out and then we can't see it.

[00:38:03]

You know, it sucks because if like Dave does kick your ass that everyone's like Dave, what the fuck. Right. Right. No, but it's I mean, kids are like, completely consensual. I mean, maybe if we play in a video, I'm like I give my full consent to getting my ass kicked. No, no papers can do it like headgear. I'll sign a waiver. Pays for my medical expenses. Can you give me health insurance, please?

[00:38:23]

Do you want your aspirin? Sure. OK, well, she's probably dressed OK just like this. How many rounds.

[00:38:30]

Four rounds for. It's already four or five rounds.

[00:38:35]

I think they will get tired after one. Oh, you're a fucker, Jay.

[00:38:41]

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[00:39:31]

Hey man, I got a question. Yeah. What do you think about alien abductions. I mean I've been abducted. Not bad. Not so bad right here do you guys. And where were you picked up.

[00:39:43]

Sedona. Sedona. Yeah. Yeah. I mean I would love to do that sometime. Like I think that would be really fun just to like go chase aliens and stuff with somebody. Why do you say that? Like it's like you can go like fishing. Why do you say that.

[00:39:56]

Like it's almost like Area 51 and stuff like that you can go to.

[00:39:59]

Yeah. But you think aliens are going to be Area 51. They're going to be like the place you least expect it. Like Hollywood Boulevard. Yeah. Like why would an alien ever be. Aliens are so funny. Like there was a thing a couple a couple of months ago that the government said they saw aliens. Right. Government admitted to it. And then it's like, well, if they're around then why aren't they like, why don't they have a YouTube channel?

[00:40:20]

That's why I'm so confused. It's like, why is it that like, oh, you know what? I you know what there's a theory about aliens is that aliens are which totally actually makes is the only thing that makes sense.

[00:40:31]

Yeah. Is that aliens are real and the only time they come to Earth is to fix situations and they're like they're us. Aliens are us in a future life. Oh well. And they're coming back down to fix things here on earth and then I'll leave. That's the only thing that makes sense because of that. Why the fuck would the aliens not interact with us?

[00:40:49]

Like what code would they be breaking if they came down and they were like, hey, humans, can we borrow some of your water?

[00:40:55]

We'll give you or Petron? It's this new chemical we have that fixes all your diseases in exchange for some water. Like how are there not intergalactic negotiations going on? That's that's what I'm saying. Like, there's obviously aliens outside and I'm sure there's aliens that can that can transcend through fucking black holes and time and all that. And that could, you know, have. Contact with us. I just I think it's a little bit of bullshit. What do you think it's like when you get beamed up into a spaceship?

[00:41:23]

You know, it's like really bright people talking weird language, like like like how lang lang lang lang lang lang lang lang.

[00:41:31]

What if they just all speak Spanish then in fuck to I don't know, Spanish. I'd like to. Yeah but wouldn't that be like so great. I'd be good. What the fuck were you guys from.

[00:41:40]

And they're like in Spanish. They're all in to go. Yeah.

[00:41:46]

We're like are you fucking kidding me with Spanish the entire time. I see what you see. Oh my fucking this is amazing.

[00:41:55]

Can we be my friend up here too so he can fucking help me translate. This is so crazy without you.

[00:42:00]

It's like a completely different language. It's in Spanish. You still have trouble though. You still have trouble because you don't know Spanish that I like somebody. Does anybody speaking. Anybody speak English.

[00:42:14]

No, no. No English. Oh English. Are you fucking kidding. We're this close. Oh you know of English. Like we're literally that we're very close. So you're trying to tell me if I had paid attention in eleventh grade and like that, we could be having a conversation right now after some convincing. The aliens tell me that they only get one chance to beam up one human and they picked me so they can't go back and find another Spanish speaking once.

[00:42:39]

And I have to fucking figure it out.

[00:42:40]

These guys, it's like you're our only hope. But expanding Google translator Yeah, it's bits and pieces getting out small. Yeah.

[00:42:47]

I'm like, oh my God, I'd be crazy. I'd love to meet aliens. If you think aliens listen to his podcast.

[00:42:52]

Phineas does. He has. Yeah. And he's a great musician. So maybe maybe he's an alien. He's pretty out of this world. Yeah, he is pretty out of this world.

[00:43:00]

Maybe he is. I was streaming last night.

[00:43:03]

Oh. I saw him for the first time last night. I was it was really fun when he was insane. Jay Well tell me what happened. He was fucking number two on Twitch. Number one of people watching Call of Duty like he was above any single other streamer on Twitch.

[00:43:19]

I say, yeah, one point we had 50000 concurrent people on the line of No.

[00:43:23]

Fifty five thousand, which is insane. I'm twittering my first game we played, we won, which is like a really big deal.

[00:43:29]

You know how tough it is to you. Play with your friends. Yeah, I played with Illia, Mike and Adelia do.

[00:43:34]

And Joe did. All right. It was just really funny.

[00:43:37]

Brokers' Everybody was dead except me. And I got the final kill in, like, a really lucky situation.

[00:43:44]

And that was the first game we played. Like, how perfect of that bin, like was my first stream on Twitch. I'm going to do more, by the way, guys, so go subscribe.

[00:43:51]

But it was like it was like fucking crazy that I had this, like, shining moment in my first stream and like then it was clipped everywhere, like on Twitch SportsCenter posted it.

[00:44:00]

No way. And ESPN posted it on their fucking Instagram, like the official pages.

[00:44:06]

The dude who created the fucking call of duty tweeted at it. Oh, yeah, they do. Look, recall created. He tweeted me is like, how do I get in touch with this guy? And it was it was it was a clip of me getting the winning kill. No, it was fucking crazy. It's like it was one killer. Like changed changed my gaming world.

[00:44:22]

Did you like it? I loved it. I had so much fun. You'll do it again. Yeah, I loved it. If people donated money and stuff. The worst part is people in the game. There's this thing called stream sniping. Yeah. So how War Zone works is you're playing against one hundred other players in the game. Yeah, but there's people now that they're watch your stream and they'll try to find you in the game. So now they know where you are because they're watching you on your stream and they'll come and try to fucking kill you.

[00:44:45]

And it's unfair. And I killed one of the guys. And when you kill somebody, you hear their mike for a second. It's called the death chat. So, like, I killed the guy and all you hear is fuck you, David.

[00:44:54]

Fuck you, David. You're here for thirty seconds. It's really funny.

[00:44:58]

It was my first time being recognized in the game. It felt really, really funny. I got this all the time. We have for this podcast, guys, for listening. Make sure to tune in for more podcast. Find me on Twitch. I'm going to be twitching more. It's Twitch that David Dobek and I see you guys later. It's been a news podcast. We'll see you.