Transcribe your podcast
[00:00:00]

I am writing right now. Yeah, I need to start wearing pants because I like to like I like to spread eagle baby pants don't make it better. It does make it better because I won't fly out like, you know, like some some other instances, you know, it's crazy.

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Like, I didn't care that that your nut was exposed. Yeah. I think I would care more if it was like my dick, because I know that, like, probably in that moment it wouldn't look like the best. Right. So I would probably, like, freak out a little bit in that situation.

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But like is like fine nut comes in all sizes, you know. Yeah. If you see a small it's just like whatever that doesn't really matter. It's like the penis that really matters. Welcome back to Zen. All right. All right.

[00:00:41]

Let's throw the intro baby esque. Oh, let me get a sip first. I'm not ready for an episode. Forty six. This is bad and I don't know when to time biceps. You know what?

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You're ready. It's coffee tar baby.

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That was my first time ever doing that. I didn't think I could do it until I did that to on it. Wow. We did the the air by the camera. Yeah. Just another take talk move. I just thought another earthquake was happening. Well, y'all feel that was a fucking fat joke. Somebody's got something on his mind, but he's got more on his stomach. Oh, more or less because I lost 14 pounds. You take that baby boy.

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Let's just jump right into it. Anybody got something going on for the week? Anything. And that's it for today's episode. No, we're good. That's what I went to Florida last week or this week. Sorry, I just got a couple of days ago, the jet lagged. It was good. I went back because there was like, you know, just stuff going on. But, you know, during these times, man, everything is just shit.

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Like whatever problems you have during these times is just it's just ten times worse because, like, it's just like we're in the worst part of our lives right now. And it's just so depressing. But I just went back. I had to take care of, like, some stuff and. Yeah, and he came back by flight. I was on top of my flight coming back. My flight coming back. Remember your story, how you're next to a lady who was like two ladies that were like harassing or disgusting man.

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You had like a little cough and they just, like, freaked out. Yeah, I knew I had no freak out, but this lady came on the plane, that ass in a full hazmat suit, hazmat suit. Like, I got exaggerated. Yeah. But it wasn't yellow. It was white. If it was yellow, I feel like people would have been like, that's a little scary because then I'd be thing like that bitch. Got it.

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You know what I'm saying? Or is like, what the fuck is on this plane, you know what I mean. Like what's in the air? I mean, I know we Corona's in the air, but like what's in the air, we're like, you got to look like that. She had a she had that full suit. She had a full face card. She had goggles. You think she had to take it off to go through TSA?

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She had to. She had to actually. No, they might not have to. She's wearing a belt on underneath. Yes. But her dog didn't have any mask on canceled. Can't dogs catch it? I don't know that in the beginning they were saying pets could get it. So but not anymore. The dog vaccines. Come on. It's like, what's the truth? I don't know. But like, so she she walked in and stayed there the whole time.

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Just sat in her seat. Yeah. And I was trying so hard. There was a couple of times where I just you know, you got to let some cops out sometimes, you know, because like clearing your throat, like Roth, like I'm sick, like your throat and their whole flight there was like to that like I just really I was like, oh my God, because I didn't want that. This lady was right in front of me.

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I didn't want her to, like, freak out on me and then, like, cause a scene just like you two ladies said. So it was just really funny. I just had a really hold it back. And and it's such an awkward time too. Like where if you sneeze and public feels illegal. Yes. It's like such like a you have to like let it be known like it's not a it's not a chronic cough, it's not a corona sneeze.

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Like Yeah. Like just give you that like even if it's just like a little you're, you're disgusting man. Look you're a disgusting, disgusting man and when you have like a cough attack and like, you know, people around you are tired of it and you start to do like the Holdman or you do the. Oh yeah. Yeah. Oh, like you're struggling. I always expect, like in public for them to be like that scene and monsters.

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I think we've got a twenty three idea. We're got to do it soon. Yeah. That was your lady. That movie, that movie is pretty much happening right now. Some people are thinking that Monsters Inc was ahead of its time. Well, yeah, it was incredible, but that it's basically an ode to like. Pizza, gay and like Adrien Akram, oh, OK, I don't know if connected to the. That's a whole nother conversation.

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So I don't know if you guys know what Adrianna Chrom is.

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But basically, it's this theory that a lot of elite high politicians, very wealthy people and just people with power are drinking the blood of a child that has been basically scared to death.

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And they'll harvest their blood while the adrenaline is pumping through them, like when they're, like, terrified what? So they'll drink it. And basically, like, it's the fountain of youth. Did you see that clip?

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I just saw this clip on Tech Talk, but it was a clip of. What's what's the guy's name? Family Feud. Steve Harvey. Steve Harvey.

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There is a clip of a lady showing a product. And she was like, it's made out of human blood.

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Like it was a word that was it shouldn't it shouldn't be in products. It was like like I forgot the I wish I could have it up. So I know I can tell you exactly what I heard.

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But he it was a word where she brought up and he was just like made out. It was like it made him question it. Yeah. And she she's like, this is Oprah's favorite product. It makes it so probably that keeps her youthful bulba. And I remember she like put it all over his hand and then she and then she said it was made out of foreskin. It was like made out of foreskin. And he's like it's made out of white.

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And you put that shit all over my head.

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Like I remember it was like like just a really weird it's a lot of weird stuff coming out. Like there was an interview on The Ellen show with Sandra Bullock and they were like talking about something. And she was like, yeah, I have this. She got like stuff on her face, whatever to like, stay looking young. And they were like, what is it? And she like hesitated for a second and made it seem like she was making a joke.

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She was like, it's. It's it's foreskin, like making it seem like it was something like completely unbelievable, can we play the clip actually and then and we're cutting our foreskin off, like when they give birth to us.

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Why are we kind of something that's going to keep us youthful? Because they're making God damn money off of our. It's a scam.

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I fucking knew it. I've been known since I was a baby. I knew that shit. Like, why are they cut it off so early? Yeah. Let me let me have the choice to cut it off.

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I want cleanliness. Yeah. Right there. Selen are frickin foreskin. This has become a conspiracy podcast. So this is the clip with Sandra Bullock through micro needling.

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I was like a little roller with these. Some of you I don't think many of you know, it pushes through the skin and ruptures of collagen and then boost it. You look like a burn victim for a day. But then but then it pushes is what are you pushing into the skin? Sanjuro Sarah. So, Kari, what are you pushing into the skin while you push in whatever the facial is would like to insert into your pores? But what is it?

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It is an extraction from a a piece of skin that came from a young person far, far away. And they somehow figured out how to extract its foreskin from a Korean baby, if that's what it is.

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OK, you can't I feel like she said she's talking about you could tell she's she doesn't want to sell. It also is like pushing it. I don't like what it's. What do you want to say? Say what?

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But I also feel like Ellen is like like she, she obviously knows what it is. I feel like this is my opinion and she's just this is just like a game to her is like, come on Sandra. Say it's like we do that, we do that to each other all the time, every time. Like you're talking about something and I know what it is, you're like, come on. You say, I feel like they're doing that.

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It's it's weird.

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It's weird. But does it work? I don't know. In the gay community, we have a different meaning of people.

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That's like any skin is flawless looking to go.

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But like when you think about, like, the fucked up shit that's going on, it's not seeming too far off.

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But basically, people were saying that Monsters Inc is kind of like another way of showcasing that so they would harvest the screams of a scared child. And that's what gives the the life, the energy.

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It's crazy because I have to have a hit hidden meeting. Why can't we just be entertained in that? Have you seen the Disney movie meetings with offices in the castle?

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Everything's got to be something bunch of perverts trying to put penis grow up. I feel like it's like it's like adults, like just throwing jokes out. They're like, oh, look at what we can do and we can get away with.

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It's like the original Little Mermaid verse where there's a penis on the. Do you really. I have it at home.

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That's got to be worth getting noticed that the first time he watched it. Yeah. I'm okay now. Thanks Little Mermaid.

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And that's why Ariels, my favorite princess.

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A quick word from our sponsors. Today's episode is brought to you by Honey.

[00:09:43]

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Save that money. Hmm. It's easy.

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[00:11:50]

We're going to be watching it as well. It sounds pretty good. Yeah, and we're all excited to see it. So, guys, if you want to check it out, you can go to HBO. Match.com Slash raised by Wolves premieres this Thursday, September 3rd on HBO.

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Max, while I was in Florida, I actually talked to my uncle that was in Lebanon and Beirut. And where is he?

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Still over there. He's he's still over there. Like he said, it's fine. You know, they'll get by it. Obviously, everybody's house is is still like all the windows are still shattered.

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They can't fix everybody's houses forever. Like, imagine that happened here.

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It would take so fucking long for just for everybody's houses to be completely fixed and done to move on is just crazy.

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It's going to take it's going to take a little bit how far he was from the blast.

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Um, no, I didn't ask. We're actually Ozzy. We're just catching up because we haven't talked in years where I've been I haven't talked to my uncles and probably like six years. Well, so so we all just caught up.

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I saw my cousins like so, you know, they're like just old. They're so much older now.

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It's so weird when you see, like, kids grow up. Yeah. And they're like, my cousins are my blood cousins, but like, you know, just some cousins you just don't keep up with. You just don't like. But it's just crazy.

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Not like the part of your family that you would see, though, when you went to visit Lebanon. Yeah, kid. Yeah. Those are the people that we would see when I when I lived there, too. When I lived there, I lived there for like a year, a year and a half. I went to school there.

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I, I was I was pretty much a citizen. It was it was a crazy citizenship. No, no.

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Not like actual citizenship, but I just felt like I like I was just I believe there because I feel like like was it a weird feeling like going there to be like this feels like home more than the US, or was it just kind of like you felt.

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No, no. I mean, I was young. I was young when I was living there.

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I was I was I think I was in the kindergarten or first grade when I was eight because I went to school there to school system is crazy out there. Like you saw the tank with all the kids, like around it kind of like looked like that.

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Oh, that's how you guys got to school. That was the bus.

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No, not the tank part, but just like just a lot of dirt everywhere and a lot of kids running around with like no shoes on. Like it was just very like interesting.

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Yeah. The look of the schools, it's very everything all the buildings just have like this like like Arab architecture, if that makes sense. Like every school, this just looks like a mosque. They don't take the cheap, easy route. They like to actually put like. Yeah, but know it's not like it's not as beautiful as a mosque, a mosque. They really put time into it. They try to do their best to make it look beautiful.

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But like the schools is just like the architecture is just a much different design. All the girls like are in scarves. And I think actually half of them, because a lot of them were probably not even because four girls in the Muslim culture are Middle Eastern culture. If they do wear scarves once you once you have your period, then you start wearing a scarf.

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So if you haven't hit your period yet, you don't know that you don't have to wear a scarf. You know, one was probably wearing it when.

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Yeah, like in people your age. Exactly. The older kids at the school or something would wear it. Exactly.

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I don't know if that rule is still the same or has changed, but I just that's what I always been told have been taught within our family.

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But I don't know if it's still like that in school, but they used to just hit kids.

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I know they used corporal punishment. They used to beat us in class. But the parents I go to Catholic school.

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Yeah, because Catholic school was like that too, with the ruler. Oh, they would hit him in Catholic school too. Yeah.

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My dad got kicked out because the the nun went to like him and he like it caught her off. He pushed her back.

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Don't hit me. And like that's a huge no no I guess so we were having none of this any good but yeah. So I guess she like went to like hit him again like, like they would hit like hard I guess all the time and like he like grabbed her arm.

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All I can think of as American Horror Story Asylum Sister Jude. Oh yeah. That doesn't seem right to me.

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Well that's just how it was. Yeah. It was a different time. And parents parents allowed it to like they were fine with the teachers hitting. If anyone is going to hit my kid is going to be me. Exactly.

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Me too. You know, I don't know.

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But I feel like even now, like it's really like it's a really look down upon like when you when someone sees a parent hitting their kid.

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Right. Yeah.

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It's a change. Yeah. Yeah, I remember. Remember I told you guys that I used to I used to forge people's signatures on detentions in middle school like in Florida.

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My dad told me that I did that in Lebanon too.

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When I was when I was he was a bad little kindergartner. So apparently I always had good handwriting. I'd always forged signatures. I think I remember forging my own like my own stuff for my own work.

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But he said I would do it for other people, too. That's how you made, like a little side hustle. I was I wasn't paying. I was in charge and I was doing it for free.

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I was going to say Heela. Per year, we'd always go to this little spot called ZYFLO, where there would be a little like Dickin, which is a store in Arabic, there's a little store, this little old lady would run it and she would have like all the chocolate candy in the world.

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And we'd always go there and there would be this like little area where we'd play soccer. But it's all concrete. And like within the concrete walls are houses.

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It's the craziest thing. It's like thing. But going from that to America and back was just it was a completely different fucking world.

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Traveling out of the United States is such a culture shock, like no matter where you go.

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Yeah, I used to speak fluent Arabic, too, and like were they was everyone speaking like a different language when you were in school? Yeah, we all spoke Arabic and now you've cut, I don't know, a lick of Arabic. It's crazy ISIS.

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My dad told me, like as a baby, I'd screamed everybody like in Arabic.

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And to me that's crazy because, like, I like I just don't know it. Now, there's times where, like, my dad would be talking in Arabic and like, there's a few words I'll maybe understand, but like, you know, like I is just like completely left my left my brain. But like, there is this road trip that we took to Syria.

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And I remember specifically us all packed up in this tiny car in the ACC was just broken in like the desert island, Middle East on our way to Syria and just going to all these things.

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And we were in our like mosques, like our So Lakshmi's and just going to these different, like, little restaurants like to meet.

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Those are like not even restaurants are like hole in the wall. Like they don't have like a Chili's or Applebee's. Yeah, no, it's nothing like that.

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So interesting. You were outside of Beirut though. But would you go often to Beirut? Oh, all the time. Yeah.

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We have our family live there because it was like the city like it was like going to downtown, OK.

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It was like the tall buildings all the all the, all the stores you go like you'd go shopping over there.

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It was like like Beirut was like really is it like a really nice city and our uncle like, like going our family's houses, they had like nice apartments, nice houses. Do you want to go back. I do. I do. I do really want to go back there. We we're going to go to Lebanon this year. And I checked the calendar and I had I had Lebanon on the days that the that explosion happened, like you were supposed to be there.

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We were supposed to be there when the explosion happened. Really?

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Which is crazy. Yeah. Like I have in my calendar. I'll show you. It's like like we were like the time the bomb happened.

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That's when we were in Lebanon. Oh, man.

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I don't know if we would be in Beirut or not because I feel like we would probably stay at the right moment.

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But I feel like anywhere around there. Yeah.

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Be like for some reason I feel like I probably I feel like we would have stayed there longer just to like help out my uncle and all that. I just feel like we would have just been there for an extra like couple of weeks.

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What kept you from going? Like, why didn't you with a pandemic? Just everything. Yeah. So it's like the only restrictions are obviously we couldn't go, but I just thought I was like insane. It was going to happen. So the last time you went was when you were a kid. Yeah. Well, you guys wanna go Lebanon.

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Yeah, it would be an exception. It would be one hell of an experience for you guys to go cool. It'd be crazy for you guys to go out there and be exciting. I know Matt would love to go like not like because when Matt found out I was going, this was like months before I told him I was going and he really wanted to go.

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He was like to to take me with you don't really.

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When I was like, fuck and I did Matt and moving on the road. But yeah. Well enough about me. Five minutes. Enough about me.

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This is your podcast too. How is your week. What happened. It was my brother's birthday. That's me. Happy birthday Bob.

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So I had a nice little birthday with her. Yes.

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How old are you now? Twenty six. Twenty six. I look seventeen six.

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We made food and we watched a movie. Where did you watch a movie.

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Well one of my birthday gifts was a projector for outside so he got me an inflatable screen and then we got a projector. So we sat in the hot tub with some tubes, some snacks, some drinks and we watched the town.

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Did it feel like you're obviously not a drive in theater, but did any of the drive in theater?

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That's so. So it's I don't know why. Like, I've just been obsessed with like the thought of like having a projector outside, like. Yeah, in the backyard.

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Wanted it for three years. It's three years. Oh.

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You waited this long to get here. You got a build up of my sister bought this little it's like a little cheap projector.

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It's really tiny but it's it's really high quality. It's really good. So she'll sit in the hot tub and projected onto like the hot tub lid because like her little screen, I was like, that looks she sits in the hot tub.

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She watched they play whiplash on it. Oh, that's on it. Yeah. Oh, God. Imagine playing Halo on that shit.

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Oh Heath and I want to go on Zillow on it and just look at this house. Look around you go on Chatroulette. They see the whole backyard. They're like, oh my gosh, what a shot. Yeah. It's really nice. So thank you.

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That's awesome. I love it. Dad's a good birthday gift. I know. He feels like kind of like he was trying to think of a birthday gift. We're talking about your birthday gifts. I know he was.

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Wait until it is. No, it is. It's just all trying to find a birthday gift for someone that you care like. It's always so hard. Like for the past four years, I, I still haven't gotten like a birthday gift for any of my family because I just don't know what if I can get them.

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It's so difficult. I have like a list of stuff, like there'll be times where she'll say something and I'll just like put it that like I have.

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And that's what I do, like little things that I could get her like.

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Even if somebody brings it up for a split second, like if my if my parents say something for a split second, I'll write it down.

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Giving is cool though, because like I don't know, it feels good. Yeah, it's fun. Right.

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Which a white elephant on the white elephant game on this podcast. Baby fun for Christmas.

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Maybe so I guess. Yeah, I'm the same way with cards though.

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Like I'm like am I really going to spend like six dollars on a card like with someone else's. Were you better. I will.

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It's it's like a lot of people do like that though. It's like the thought. It's like my family all is they're obsessed with cards. Yes.

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It's like I don't I mean I open my shit upside down and make sure anything falling out of there and every little thing my mom's like, did you send them a card?

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Did you send them a thank you card? Send them this card, send them every.

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That's how you telling people are like that.

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I know for other than the birthday, I don't think anything else really happened. Do you have a good weekend. Oh. Oh just kidding. I fucked somebody. Fuck you Kenny.

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That really surprised me. But I was outside of my house and I was getting ready to get in my truck and this car was driving by really slowly and like. I don't know, like I just, like, looked over and the passenger was looking dead at me and I was like, looking back. Yeah. And I was just like. Holy shit, that was Miley Cyrus, Miley Cyrus, she was outside of your house, drove right by our property.

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Did you what did you invite her in for some Crockett's and A.. Crockett's for some Crockett's. She British Miley Cyrus in four. Well, she's she's she's single now. She's not with Hemsworth anymore. She invited her. She's actually Simsim.

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She was with Cody Simpson and they broke up too. Maybe that's why she was Amy so hard. She was looking exactly right. She was like, what is this fucking weirdo? She fucking I don't fucking care who you are.

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You FaceTime to me like while I was in the bathroom and you're like, you're not going to believe what it is. I'm like, where are you?

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You're like, I'm outside Kenenisa a big Stan. Good for you Heath. You deserve that. You need a little bit of excitement. No, I deserve that. I'm a fan. So some people are a little bit luckier than others.

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The second that he said that, I was like, oh, tell her midnight sky slaps. He was like, huh?

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She slapped who? I'm a nice guy, actually. Sounds like a celebrity like daughter. Oh, yeah. Oh, my daughter Midnight's. Gosh, it's kind of pretty.

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It is pretty beautiful. I mean, my daughter Aurora Borealis. That's beautiful. It's kind of cool.

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She dresses up as Princess Aurora for Halloween. Oh, there's a Princess Aurora. Sleeping Beauty. Her name's Aurora. Yes. Oh my. Really. What's Cinderella's name. Cinderella. You're like, so what was Beauty's name?

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Was it first name?

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Beauty Hublin. That's not her name though. It's not her name. Very good. What is her name. You know her name. Haining the Beast.

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Oh, hold on. I actually know Annabel. Something something.

[00:25:02]

Annabel no, that's a horror movie. Oh, that's a doll. Belle. Bella, it's Belle. It's Belle. It's yeah, it's Belle. I got some. Thank you. You guys look to me like most people.

[00:25:12]

When I said Annabel I said Beau. He said Annabel.

[00:25:15]

And then he said Belle. And then he said Bella. And then you said Belle. I just wanted Heath to freak out a little bit, you know, a little bit of steam. Come on.

[00:25:22]

All trying to get me worked up. What's the bee supposed to be a mammoth? Like what's is he a bull Bigfoot?

[00:25:31]

Oh, well, who's the bees? I think I think I think it's like a like a fictional creature because it's a penis. Oh, yeah. That's why they just call him.

[00:25:41]

He's kind of like a beauty in the world. Women beauty and the you in the bare beauty in the Bigfoot.

[00:25:49]

Do you believe in Bigfoot?

[00:25:52]

No, I don't like the videos that are really fun to like watch the deer hunters, I think. Oh, fun.

[00:25:58]

I think there's an actual like Harry Harry, people like that back then because you know, like. Oh so you think it's just a man that's just Harry. Yeah.

[00:26:09]

I'm into that because like they're thinking about like thousands of years ago, what did like cavemen look like?

[00:26:17]

Just giant hairy men, you know? So maybe there had to be there has to be still men like that out there.

[00:26:22]

When people say I was born in the wrong era, I want to be born with all the Harryman. Oh, me, a big old self. I'm an old soul.

[00:26:29]

I think there's something. I don't know if I like it when it's like an actual Bigfoot, the Loch Ness monster, also the the chupacabra, the chupacabra.

[00:26:40]

Funny story. I was in Boy Scouts and we had to come up with like a whatever a team name. And we were the chupacabras.

[00:26:46]

I thought you said funny story. I got it right. They just deleted all the topics I had.

[00:26:56]

Can he would love this story, but I want to know.

[00:27:01]

And he says that it I want to talk about the time where I think it was like me, Todd, David and Jason. We all did poppers.

[00:27:13]

You would love this story because this was like, oh, this was like this was like probably, what, three years ago?

[00:27:23]

I think three or four years ago, we we were out on on cinema, not in Santa Monica, on Santa Monica Boulevard. And we walked by this sex store and we're like, oh, let's go in. So we went into the sex store and I think the guy recognized David. And so he was kind of like, oh, yeah, you guys have fun here. And I think he was just kind of showing us everything. And he's like, have you guys started bombers?

[00:27:45]

And we're like, what were you? Or are you in West Hollywood? Yeah.

[00:27:51]

And and I remember David filmed all of this, but we never put it out because it was just like it ended up just being. Yeah. Know, making out OK. Maybe people that don't know what poppers are probably.

[00:28:02]

Oh yeah. Explain what poppers are. Yeah.

[00:28:04]

So Hopper's also don't know what they are and we did them, they come in this little small cylindrical canister thing that's after you take it right. You have to have the container to take it.

[00:28:17]

You don't have the drug, you can't take it.

[00:28:20]

So they're located inside the cylinder and you usually inhale it usually through one nostril.

[00:28:28]

Yes, you're doing. Doing what you never in heels on the ground.

[00:28:34]

So it's kind of clean it up or, you know, it's just sort of considered like a like a gay thing because it's common in the gay community, because it has other effects that happen when you take it.

[00:28:50]

So that's why I can tell you how I felt. OK, which ones?

[00:28:59]

Oh, no, no.

[00:29:00]

Explain explain what the effects are. Well, OK, so one of the effects is that it's like kind of a muscle relaxer.

[00:29:05]

So for gay men, the walls of their anus will become more relaxed. So it will make having homosexual sex easier.

[00:29:19]

OK, so we ended up all taking poppers for Dave for David's vlog. And I just remember all just feeling like really giggly and weird. But is that where you're supposed to feel like Gigli? Gigli. I'm just nodding.

[00:29:34]

I'm like, yep, yep, I'm fine.

[00:29:36]

I did not feel anything in my butt though so. But it did feel like somewhat high. Well, I relaxed. I've only relaxed. It was my butthole that was relaxed. Maybe it's like huffing paint, I'm guessing.

[00:29:52]

I don't know. Is this a stupid question?

[00:29:55]

Is it like a drug powder or liquid or a pill? What is it?

[00:29:58]

It's liquid. Uh, because there's like name. There's a hold on like. No, it's not poppers. I remember it was. Oh, a liquid chemical. It's a liquid chemical holding a small bottle. That's why I like the liquid up your nose. No, you just like fumes that come from the liquid.

[00:30:12]

Kind of like it's like a sharpie hrb. Yeah. So it's like like that's why they have they have names like, like jungle juice and like whatever.

[00:30:20]

So yeah, you inhale it and it just I don't know, I probably felt like what you were feeling like, just very kind of like spacey and like chilled. Yeah.

[00:30:29]

Whatever, but it just only lasted for like three seconds and I'm not trying to be the one in the club that's just like every five seconds like oh that's long enough for these guys, like that's enough for me.

[00:30:42]

And then and then we start playing with this like sex chair. And then we just had a whole day.

[00:30:48]

And then I just remember that we all watched this footage and we were just like poses and then and then that was it.

[00:30:56]

Yeah. But our experience was far more gay than my experience was.

[00:31:01]

We went out in the town after those poppers.

[00:31:04]

Yeah, it was, it was just so I'm like, they're legal over the counter. Like you can just.

[00:31:08]

Yeah I would imagine they are. I wonder where the name comes from. Finger popping each other that I specifically remember the only other time I've ever heard of poppers.

[00:31:18]

Where was Coachella like four years ago.

[00:31:20]

We we had because we were doing car car camping and we know that there is this tent next to us. It was full of dudes. There was this giant full of dudes were all sleeping in. And we remember that we just kept hearing like the word poppers. And you didn't know what it was at the time.

[00:31:38]

I didn't know what it was at the time in Scott or Todd told me what it was, but it was just it was I wish I could remember what exactly was said in the tent, but like, we know that it was just being used along the top of your baby.

[00:31:51]

If you guys are getting high libido, poppers all have an order in Japan. I got the grill. If you want to throw it on my grill, you want to throw it down on my grill. I'm open for biz. Yeah, they're legal. They're legal in the US. They look like little five hour energies.

[00:32:05]

They look exactly like, oh my God, it does. Yeah. So it's like legal in most countries it looks like, but they just can't be advertised in a lot of them.

[00:32:13]

Wasn't salvia legal.

[00:32:15]

And then it became illegal after like, like studies where Spice Spice Spice was like the the weed that you could buy from the gas station.

[00:32:24]

Yeah. Spice Non-Salaried salvia. Salvia. It's I thought it sounded like Irenaeus know Engeneic like yeah I messed up, I meant I actually meant spice. It's like the fake, the fake we had in Florida. A little spice was like an incense that they sold at gas stations that you would like burn in your house. But people would smoke it and it would give you the effects of being high.

[00:32:45]

But it was like it was like dangerous though. Oh my God. I remember like most fucked up shit you.

[00:32:50]

Oh yeah. That that's why it's not like it's not like from the Earth or. Oh I love synthetic shit.

[00:32:58]

Did you ever try spice.

[00:32:59]

No, I was, I was too scared because I've heard stories of people smoking that and like not being I tried it one time. You did.

[00:33:06]

How was it was why do I feel like it's like smoking a lot of like cigars, like a ton of cigars. And then it was like or block and mild. Sorry, I remember black and miles and Miles were great.

[00:33:18]

I loved those. Those are fucking gross.

[00:33:20]

I look at me just like, no, I'm just trying to figure out whatever it like is spice like is it green like that. But that's a question I like. Like what is it.

[00:33:28]

It looks like it's not a plan. It looks like it's made. So it says it's a range of laboratory made chemicals that mimic the effects of THC. Right.

[00:33:35]

But like, just a. like like, well, weed was like really illegal in Florida. So that's. But Spice wasn't illegal, right.

[00:33:44]

That's why we got go. Thank goodness. Times have changed. It's like, why? Oh, we're not. The thing that's grown from the ground is illegal. So we're just going to smoke this thing that was made in a laboratory.

[00:33:55]

Just don't do drugs. It's stupid, especially since we've done it. Not a good idea. So do as we say. Not as we do. Exactly.

[00:34:02]

Do you remember the the hanging upside, the hanging upside down flowers there are called the devil thorn or something. The dinosaur trumpet. The Devil's Trumpet. I know people people I know people in Florida would eat that eat the flowers and hallucinate, you know.

[00:34:16]

You know, you're not supposed to eat the whole flower, apparently, supposedly like a little bit like people.

[00:34:20]

Some people do the dumbest licking toads who did through the what, like toads licking toad like frog gives you like a it's like some insane high like it's a hallucinogen.

[00:34:33]

I'm pretty sure I going look it up. They have like the secretion like these oils that come out of there, like bumps on the back of toes. Oh my God.

[00:34:40]

What about boffing. Is that what it's called. What's boffing boffing.

[00:34:43]

Look up boffing. What is bouffe.

[00:34:46]

I remember my friends to talk about doing it and I was never with you have no idea what boffing is. I know it boffing is.

[00:34:51]

Oh, boffing is the act of inserting drugs into your anus for a much stronger trip, even though it is named like a synonym for farting.

[00:34:57]

Oh wait. Hold cock a hall. And with what's the what's the other thing where they would like put shit and piss in a bottle and then put a balloon. Oh yes, I remember that.

[00:35:07]

And in my head I thought that was this is not my world.

[00:35:11]

You've remember seen people put pee and poop in a like a big two liter bottle, put a balloon over it, and then the gases would fill the building. They lied.

[00:35:19]

They literally set it out in the heat. Yeah.

[00:35:21]

To make the the thing the things rise. Yeah. Oh, my God. I'm going to have to clear my search history.

[00:35:27]

Maybe that's why my toilet smells like them.

[00:35:30]

Oh my God, Genco. That's what it is.

[00:35:34]

What. Yup. Never heard that term. Jenk was reported to be a popular street drug among Zambian street children. OK, so this is an international trend. I think this would be a great video for us.

[00:35:47]

It's a great first scene in the video trying to come for the first time.

[00:35:51]

If you can't beat them, join them because normally you'd get like content like that to David.

[00:35:56]

But like, we're going to keep it for for stretching my purse. Yeah. Yeah.

[00:36:00]

It literally says there was a moral panic in the United States after widespread reports of Jenk becoming a popular recreational drug in middle and high schools across the country. More open, got more open.

[00:36:11]

What did we do that like who's like I want to get high so bad that I'll do whatever it takes and I can't find it anywhere else.

[00:36:20]

I'm going to find something within my body.

[00:36:22]

People who come up with, like new ways.

[00:36:25]

They should put that energy somewhere else when we need it. Right. Chemist with all that energy they can. Well, Mariah, they are they are chemists. It's just they're experimenting on themselves.

[00:36:37]

Do people still, like, smoke this shit or is this like I, I don't see why there's any reason to smoke the manmade laboratory stuff rather than the stuff that's once again, times have changed.

[00:36:48]

I feel like more people are just vaping. Yeah. I feel like it's just easier for me. You get anywhere and you know, you've been mugged. Remember when people vape out of those giant fucking square to the big. Oh yeah. Yeah. But those tasted good though.

[00:37:01]

Those giant what those like deserve the flavor was immaculate. You for those like like have you tasted like the waffle and Serb one.

[00:37:11]

The shit. It was a breakfast like you didn't have the good unicorn's milk. Yeah. It tastes like marshmallows.

[00:37:18]

Oh my gosh. Speaking of that, I saw we got to try this. This guy we got try right.

[00:37:23]

They took a bowl of Lucky Charms pumpkin. It ate the bowl and then they had just that Lucky Charms milk and then they poured that into cold brew and use that.

[00:37:34]

Oh. Oh, wow. It looked amazing. And that's on our coffee flavor. Right. And then you put whipped cream and put the marshmallows, sprinkle marshmallows on top.

[00:37:43]

Oh, Gloria, I don't know. Bah bah bah bah bah. Oh, hot stuff. Right for our store. Right there you have. Experience because we want to see it, I can see it, too. Hey, I'm Miriam. I'll be your barista today and it's good I'm on so much income right now. Hey, Tony, can you pass me the paper?

[00:38:15]

You guys are stupid.

[00:38:17]

I feel like I'm talking about being high.

[00:38:19]

Know. Do you think doing alcohol is cool? It is fucking cool. OK.

[00:38:24]

I was quoting Michael Scott saying that it is a loser.

[00:38:35]

Before we continue to the rest of the episode.

[00:38:37]

We'd like to thank AT&T, 5G and Samsung for sponsoring today's podcast. Rooster Teeth is joining forces with Samsung and AT&T 5G to kick things off for their upcoming Rs6 at Home virtual event.

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They're creating a ruby outdoor mural that you can add art to from home using the Mark Augmented Reality app.

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Just download the app and start creating your Ruby art starting on September 5th through September 7th.

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If you're on the AT&T 5G network at home, you can access plus MOAD through the Mark app, so you will get the highest res video and crystal clear images to explore on the air.

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So head over to AT&T Dotcom Slash Galaxy No.

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Twenty Ultra five G to learn how you can get the Samsung Galaxy Note twenty five for free or the Galaxy Note twenty five G Ultra four to ninety nine ninety nine for a limited time was speaking to Michael Scott.

[00:40:11]

I wanted to talk about this. Do you guys think the office was the greatest show of all time. The office.

[00:40:18]

Yes, the office. The greatest of all time. It's crazy to think about shows that existed back then that would never work today. Yeah, that would be completely just inappropriate. Just it just be Arch's be canceled immediately canceled.

[00:40:31]

Grazi. There is a couple of shows I want to talk about. There's one show. Do you guys remember the show called that Matt was telling me about this the other night, superstar USA.

[00:40:42]

That sounds familiar.

[00:40:44]

OK, so it was basically it was basically like an American Idol type show. Yeah, but the whole show was based around bad singers. Yeah.

[00:40:51]

But they didn't tell these people that they were there on a show for who's the worst. It was like it was dinner for schmucks but in the singing world. Right. Right.

[00:41:00]

They have the whole audience and these people would be singing but they don't know they're on a show. I mean it was funny but it was so. All right.

[00:41:08]

So that really looks like an incentive. The judges act like it was good. I don't know. Yeah, yeah. No, they'll be like, oh, my God, your voice is absolutely amazing. Like, they would they would just feed them these. Like, that's really funny though.

[00:41:20]

It was really funny, but like it would want to do that would be so bad to today.

[00:41:26]

That said, on TV, could you imagine, Jamie, you said your heart will go on.

[00:41:30]

But as for going on to the next round. We really love you, like I watch scenes from the office and like, say it was playing today's day and age. Absolutely.

[00:41:43]

Oh, yeah. I mean, this might be fucked up. I feel like it's how you deliver it to if it's if you're saying a joke and it's not funny, like, then it's yeah. It's a little fucked up. Like it wasn't tasteful, like they're very tasteful.

[00:41:55]

It's just a joke in the end, you know, it's a fucking joke.

[00:41:58]

I love hearing fucking Arab jokes and bomb jokes. Yeah. It's the funniest thing to me because guess what, because it's not true.

[00:42:05]

It's just not true. But it's like it's just making fun of a stereotype. And I love hearing those jokes.

[00:42:11]

And it's like me with Italian, like I run with that shit. It's so funny when it's so overexaggerated, like so funny.

[00:42:18]

And I feel like you guys almost like I feel like just in your characters you're like you already know you're making like you just make fun of yourself, right.

[00:42:25]

Of course. Yeah. It's fun. It's all in good fun like that to survive and especially laugh.

[00:42:30]

If the show is singling out like one like community, it would be one thing. Yeah, they hit everybody. Everything is like everyone and they hit them equally as hard. And so I feel like it's almost justifiable. If you think about like the perspective, like, are they really trying to, like, harm this community or just dirty? It's like, no, they're just trying to make it funny.

[00:42:49]

If it's funny, I don't I love funny gay jokes. If it's a bad joke, I'm like, oh, that's a groaner. But like, I don't get offended by Marlon Wayans said something like about the scary movies. Yeah, he had an interview recently and he said that there's a lot of gay humor that like if he presented a script with that in it today, he's like, I know it wouldn't get greenlit in the exact same script. He goes, it would not make it past like the first round.

[00:43:12]

Yeah, he goes. But it doesn't mean it's not funny.

[00:43:14]

A show that reminds me that is simple life. I thought the show was the funniest thing I want to watch.

[00:43:21]

I've seen I've seen a couple episodes because my my best friend, although from back home she loved that show.

[00:43:26]

So I saw a couple episodes there, but it was it's Paris and Nicole Richie and the show is basically them going to different like cities like farm stuff. Right.

[00:43:37]

Like it's happened the way they treat other other people's way of living, like they were just entitled brats.

[00:43:44]

And it was so funny.

[00:43:45]

Yeah, there were being dumb on purpose, but they were being so smart about their they're like the reason social media is like social media. Oh yeah. They're the first influencers.

[00:43:53]

Yeah. Like they know their characters, they know where to lean into. They're like bitchiness and whatever. And it, it almost just makes it OK. It's like it's always sunny. Everyone in that show, it's always sunny in Philadelphia as a terrible person. So no one's expecting them to be a virtuous, like, generous, good person.

[00:44:10]

You know, that they're awful. So everything that they say, if it's awful and stay with this. Yeah. It fits with their character.

[00:44:17]

It is great because like we watch a couple episodes the other night and a lot of the shit that they were saying were very like, oh, man, this would never be allowed today. But like, it's so weird for a TV network or whatever to cut jokes out from a scene from a someone like a like an awful character saying something awful. Like to me it's like that's not a real person. That's an actual they're awful, right? Yeah.

[00:44:37]

It's like an awful person saying something especially.

[00:44:39]

It's like showing like this is what is awful. Exactly.

[00:44:43]

And we're all laughing at like anything. It's it's it's showing us how awful somebody can be and like don't be around people like that. I don't know.

[00:44:52]

It's like I feel like they shouldn't cut things out of shows. If it's an older show, I feel like they should just put a disclaimer in the beginning.

[00:44:59]

Yeah, no, I mean, I feel like that would be a way of kind of evolving with the times. I mean, I don't think trigger warnings were things like. Right. Trigger warning.

[00:45:06]

There's one more thing. There's another lot to talk about. Have you guys heard about the whole Bella Thorne and the only fan I saw, there's like one scandal.

[00:45:16]

I don't think that's an accurate I think I think scandal just means that there's a drama like. I mean, I think I mean, I think it's scandalous what she did because she's a Disney star that created an only fans. But you're talking about the fact that she made a million dollars and one. Yeah.

[00:45:30]

So, OK, so this is and if you can fact check this, I've watched a bunch of take talks and tweets about it, but I have not lost people are an article at her. That's all I know. Yeah.

[00:45:40]

So, so Bella Thorne, she made a she made an only fans account which is completely OK. Anybody can make one, you know, whatever.

[00:45:48]

But apparently on her only fans, she promoted it as if she was completely nude. So you you bought this.

[00:45:57]

It was like a I think it was like a picture.

[00:46:01]

It was a picture for two hundred dollars that you can buy. And she said it was a nude, which is crazy. Bella Thorne, Disney Channel actress. She has an only fans and she posted a nude.

[00:46:11]

So, you know, a bunch of people bought the picture, but when they bought the picture, the picture was a picture of her in lingerie.

[00:46:18]

Says Thawne joined only fans and set her price at twenty dollars a month for a subscription to her feed.

[00:46:23]

Oh, that is so. There was no news about that. Oh, there was no two hundred dollar thing. OK, it says. But I heard she charged two hundred dollars for a single nude photo. There are tweets circulating right now that alleged porn was selling a paper. Review nude for 200 dollars, a pay per view message is exactly what it sounds like, content that you share via message that your fans pay to view creators, set their price and can choose to send them to individual followers or to all of their followers.

[00:46:48]

There is a screenshot of what appears to be a chat between an only fans user and Thorn who confirms to the user the photo is naked. So it's just a false advertising.

[00:46:58]

Yeah, that was the only screenshot that I saw that where it showed that Bella Thorne said that she was naked, but that was the only proof.

[00:47:05]

So everybody started demanding their money back. So so only fans implemented new rules for everybody on only fans where they set all these restrictions for what? Now you can't get paid weekly.

[00:47:17]

Now it's monthly. It's the most you can the most you can pay for for a pay per view type of thing is 100 dollars or the most you can tip is one hundred dollars. So there's all these all these new rules came out because of this one situation, which hurts a lot of. Yeah.

[00:47:31]

People that are on only fans are making all their money on only things like this. They're actually saying exactly because, you know, they have bills to pay. This hurts them a lot.

[00:47:38]

And they are really pissed that she kind of ruined it for everybody. Yeah, 30 day pay out. Hundred dollar max tip fifty dollars max post price. That all changed because of Bella Thorne. That's pretty crazy. So that's why a lot of people that are.

[00:47:50]

She shook it up huh. She's shaken up the narrative, but she specifically said this is a nude photo just by that that one screenshot. That's why it could be like fake.

[00:48:00]

But like, I don't I just don't even know what to believe anymore. I think everything is just like you can fake anything.

[00:48:05]

I mean, no, I'm not doing right. She tweeted that she is not doing nudity.

[00:48:10]

I think this may have been after the backlash that she was getting. And here we are just latching on to some shit that we might have seen on the Internet, just like we'll never know. We'll never know. Are we gossiping?

[00:48:21]

Just that's why I don't get, like, tied up in the stuff. I'm just like, no, it's literally none of my business. I'm just like, whatever. I mean, it's like it was all over the Internet, but there's a lot of shit that's all over the Internet that fucking is lies. I don't know.

[00:48:35]

Yeah, I don't have a strong opinion on it. Either way. I can see why other people would have a strong opinion on it. If you're an only fans content creator, I understand why you would be up in arms about it. Right?

[00:48:44]

You know, yeah, I you know, I'm all for bellweather and wanting to, you know, express herself how she wants.

[00:48:50]

I don't know her motives. I can't weigh in on them. Huh.

[00:48:53]

On a lighter note, Ryan, I have a nice story to share. How's it going to be a long one, a little friend that we met the other day?

[00:49:01]

Oh, yeah, Jerry, we this coffee spot down the street and every once in a while we'll see this guy sitting there and he's a homeless gentleman, but he.

[00:49:14]

You could tell he really tries his best to look as clean as possible, like he like parts his hair will brush it back and like, look really nice, like he tries to wear, like, nice clothes and he's always cooking for him.

[00:49:26]

He has like a portable stove with him and a pan. And he always has, like, chicken going like he cooks for himself.

[00:49:32]

He's like a little table like off the just seems like a cool guy and he'll just like sit there and like cook food and like we've seen him like pouring like oil into the pan and like cooking like real meals. I like. That's really awesome.

[00:49:44]

I thought he was a backpacker at first. Right.

[00:49:46]

And we just kept saying, are you sure it wasn't backpackers? Is he there? Like every day? He's there pretty often. He's there early in the morning.

[00:49:52]

Yeah. Like six, seven a.m. and then disappears and that's it. Oh, you're. But doesn't. I think that's crazy. Yeah.

[00:50:01]

Like we'll see him. But he never makes eye contact with anybody. He never talks to anybody. He's just a quiet like.

[00:50:08]

Nice looking guy, like just yeah, yeah, so one day we pass by him and I was like, we should make like a little goodie pack for him and like just, you know. Yeah. See if he wants it. So we've been waiting and waiting and waiting, trying to see him and we just never saw him again. We're like, God damn, he must have like left. But the other day we were walking by and he was sitting out at the table making us food when we were walking by to come back home like, oh shit, he's there.

[00:50:36]

So he ran back to grab the bag of stuff that we had, like, put together for him. And then we circled back around and we're going to, like, walk by him again.

[00:50:44]

I called my mom right away because I don't know. Sometimes if you give people something, they'll get offended, which like you can't control the way people react.

[00:50:54]

Just just the thought is like, really all that counts. So my mom does this all the time, like she will go up to homeless people, like, do you want to, like, come to my house and shower and relax?

[00:51:03]

Like, she'll invite them in. It's like, oh yeah, yeah. She's like wild. She, she does that like often. Oh she's like she'll like talk to them like she's just like so interested and she just likes helping people. I don't know. Her and Jeff both have that in common.

[00:51:16]

So I called my mom was like, how do we approach him. Like what do we say? Because he seems like he's doing well. He never begs for anything.

[00:51:22]

He doesn't talk to people like just like looks like a backpacker. Yeah. She was like, you can't control the way people react, like just be like, hey, like we see here all the time. Like we just want to have a conversation.

[00:51:32]

We got you some stuff that you think you could use, blah, blah, blah, whatever.

[00:51:35]

So Heath and I are walking down and I was like, you say something, Vertigo's I knew you say something first and we're freaking out. Like, who's going to say the first sentence? And he the guy ends up saying the first sentence, which is weird because he doesn't talk like we've seen him, maybe like seven or eight times and he doesn't talk to anybody. So for him to say the first word, I was like that was meant to be.

[00:51:54]

And he was like, hey, I just saw you guys just just seemed like like a friend, like right away.

[00:52:00]

Like, we went up to him and we were like, oh, yeah. Like we see here all the time. Like there's a couple of things in this bag that, like we gave him like a pot and like cooking stuff and do like travel size stuff like urine and gel and selling things that like he could use a crossword puzzle. Right.

[00:52:17]

And he was just genuinely so appreciative. Like he was like, oh, he was like, thank you so much. Like. You can tell he needs it, but would never ask for it. Yeah, he wasn't like a beggar or anything. He just kept to himself. He was very, very grateful.

[00:52:35]

Yeah. As soon as we opened up to him, he he, like, got up out of his chair. You could tell he just hasn't talked to anybody yet and he just like, let it all out. Very smart guy knows what's going on in the world, like, very intelligent. And he's 11 years sober and three years homeless. He says, yeah, since his hair is like parted and it's always jump down.

[00:52:52]

And he's always like, try look as best he had a theory that, like, I thought he would be a little military test, you know, how like a lot of them become homeless because of PTSD and they just don't know how to, like, survive in this in the real world?

[00:53:05]

Yeah, it could have been something like that.

[00:53:07]

But you could tell he's like very like well mannered Clark, really well mannered.

[00:53:12]

Well, that was really sweet of you guys that you brought him back. Have you seen him since? No, I haven't.

[00:53:16]

No use. Does he need a baby? All right.

[00:53:21]

So, yeah, it was it was crazy because he was just like so in tune with what's going on right now. I'm like just telling us his thoughts about, like, the last six weeks.

[00:53:32]

I don't know. He's listening to the podcast right now.

[00:53:34]

He's like, asking you as I'm like, how does he get all his information? I wonder like I wonder if he just, like, reads the paper. I don't know. He just gets them from newsstands or something. I've seen homeless people with phones. Oh yeah. And they'll be using it and I'll and I'll be like, where the fuck.

[00:53:48]

I know I don't like like he said, baby, I'm homeless. I'm not phone list but you need service and like how do you build for your service. And you know, I mean you need like I know that's what I did.

[00:53:57]

I definitely don't think this guy had a phone because he knew a lot like it could be the newspaper could be word of mouth because he said he kept bringing up like his friends, like it could be word of mouth.

[00:54:08]

But I don't think he had a phone because you brought something up that's like about like everybody knows about it. I remember what it is that everybody knows about.

[00:54:16]

And he was like, oh, what? Tell me about that. So I think he just likes learning. And he was going on and on about the things he knows. And he goes, sorry, I'm like a big nerd.

[00:54:24]

I like I started talking about like technology and stuff and was getting smart guy.

[00:54:29]

Oh. Yeah, baby, we're gonna need a new couch. This one's getting rusty on the way in the springs are busted out.

[00:54:39]

Yeah, let me tell you, sleeping on this was not comfortable. I wouldn't imagine it would be. By the way, I don't remember anything from that last podcast.

[00:54:47]

Nothing, I was up at six thirty in the morning. Oh, cry me a river doing a podcast at six thirty in the morning as soon as you wake up. That's pretty. That's pretty tough. It was early. It was early. And I just don't remember anything I talked about because I was so worried I was going to get canceled because I said something stupid because I just didn't remember anything I fucking talked about. That's all right. And now the episode is ending.

[00:55:09]

He's unconscious.

[00:55:11]

There we go. Found a way to put the joke we've only been talking about for a week now. Before we wrap up the podcast, Kenny has something to share.

[00:55:21]

We talked about it in the last episode, but now it's all set up and we will be opening it up to you guys. So, Kenny, take it away. Yeah. So I set up a phone line for Zenin Heath to receive your guys his questions and answer them on the set.

[00:55:37]

Oh, that's fucking exciting.

[00:55:38]

Yeah, I'm stoked.

[00:55:40]

So you guys whose voices we can include the all the information down in the description below, but it'll have a number of guys a call in and you guys will kind of just give us a brief synopsis of yourself and we'll hear what you guys want to ask. So the basic instructions are going to be in the message that we are leaving for you guys to listen to when you call in. But yeah, that's going to be up and running. I'm ready to go for the next episode.

[00:56:06]

So please, guys, leave a little message if you have a question you want us to answer and we'll try to get to it.

[00:56:11]

And oh, that's that's so much better than doing a Q&A. We get to hear you guys are the actual voices on the podcast.

[00:56:16]

Well, thank you, Kenny. You're welcome for that awesome idea.

[00:56:19]

We would have never thought of ourselves.

[00:56:21]

All right. But guys, thank you so much for tuning. Tuning in again to Zainy. He's unfiltered. We love you guys so much. You can listen to the audio of this podcast every Monday on Spotify, on Apple podcast and all those other platforms and watch the video form of this podcast on iTunes, dotcom slash Zane and Ethe. Very good night on Tuesday. All that without stuttering on Tuesdays.

[00:56:40]

Whenever I have something really long to say, I hold my breath. As you can tell, I started fucking rushing towards the end just like I do right now.

[00:56:49]

Yeah, we'll see you guys next week.

[00:56:50]

And we love you very much.

[00:56:52]

We love you so much. Babies little.