Welcome, welcome, welcome to armchair expert I'm Dan Shepard. I'm joined by Monica Monsoon. Hello. Hello, sir. How are you doing? Great. How are you doing? Good. We've got an exciting group of musicians on today. Boys, boys, boys, boys, boys.
The Beastie Boys are here. The Beastie Boys are an American hip hop group from New York City, formed in 1978.
They are three time Grammy Award winners and 10 time nominees. We talked today with Michael Diamond, a.k.a. Mike D and Adam Horovitz, a.k.a. Add Rock. If you love the Beastie Boys like I do, I recommend you check out Beastie Boys Story, a Spike Jones live documentary available now on Apple TV. Plus, so please enjoy the Beastie Boys. We are supported by Squarespace, Squarespace, Squarespace, Squarespace.
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But how do I make you know, if I want to maintain good posture in this episode? Because, you know, I can tell already DAX is going to be kind of disappointed if I don't sort of represent well on that floor.
Hold on a second. I just want I want to be clear. You think I am a stickler on posture? Yeah.
You're obviously looking to me as a role model for postural alignment, and I don't want to disappoint.
Now, Adam, I'll say and I'm just to opening myself up for Dagres right now from one of my oldest friends and partners, Adam Horovitz, here. But I think my postural alignment has really improved over the over the.
Oh, my God, Mike, you are actually taller for really see my fantastic posture.
But how bad was it when we are a teenager, like, I literally couldn't even, like, look up at it was like it was like mine is now my butt.
You wanted it and you went for it and you did it, Mike. You made it happen. How tall are you, Mike?
I think I've remained five, 10 all along. But I read maybe five, ten and a half now.
Now in the dark, you read to me is six one. Yeah, I would agree it skinny six one.
I'm going to say you're blowing air up my buttock.
No, no, no, no, no, no. I would have been a considerable deal of money. Well, you being six, why can we talk about an atom?
I think we've talked about this, but I have a theory about front people of bands that you should never be over six feet. Rarely. The only exception I have to that rule is Joey Ramone.
But Joey Ramone always had the mic stand as a prop like he he felt so awkward being so tall that he was like bent over and he had the mic stand. So it kind of mitigated his his height.
I think you're ignoring one of the greatest front men of all time in Led Zeppelin. Whoa, whoa, whoa. Hold up. Robert Klatell. He's a Robert Plant. Robert Plant. I've been in public. No, we had him and I met him. We met him in a lobby.
I went camping with him. I mean, that's that's a lie.
He's a good six one and change. Not true. Maybe it's later in life. But we met him and the man is not far off from Lilliputian.
Who's Lily? I'm all the tiny characters. In what story. Yeah. Lily put, you know, the people who come from Lily.
But it's a story. Is it like Huck Finn, Lilliputian refers to a person of smaller height. I'm going to add. Very nice guy. When we met him in the in the hotel. Couldn't have been nicer, honestly.
Like it does say he's six one on the Internet. Yeah, sorry. All right. Internet. I liked him at a stoplight in Manhattan.
I'm six two and change.
And we were virtually looking to I just for whatever that's worth, unless he could add huge boots on. I don't know. I'll tell you what.
Maybe listen, maybe isn't and no disrespect, maybe it's an aging thing because we met him ten years ago when we were on tour, when we met about him.
I'm just wondering, on Wikipedia, do they take account for boots and shit on Wikipedia? Great question.
It's a great question. I doubt we'll figure that out here. Right, exactly. So here's my question.
So there was a camera operator on parenthood and his name was Arturo Skippy Afrikan.
Oh. Oh, my goodness. Do you guys know Arthur Ficano? No.
Never heard of him. He's a liar. I've been friends with Arthur since kindergarten.
OK, good, good, good, good, good, good. OK, so I think this could be a bridge by which we can trust one another. It was he in a band with one of you guys when you were little?
Yes, we were in a band. The young and the useless.
The young and the useless. OK, good.
This is now and now I have a second question to build a further bridge. Was one of you married to Wagh sister? All right, that's so that's a little bit confused.
Like Wag is a good I'm sorry, Wags wife sister why is a good friend of both of ours and he's married to Kim and Kim Davis. Her sister, director Tamra Davis is my ex-wife. There we go.
I have been asked to advise her on what Polaris Razor to buy. And so I've actually emailed with your ex-wife, having never met her, but solely to guide her on a road purchase.
No. Well, OK. Well, then I should give you props because I don't know what your background is with the Polaris, but my teenagers go out to she has a house out in the desert where I said Polaris is hot. I mean, my teenagers have taken that thing into the national park for untold miles and had had the best time.
Yeah, I mean, I went through maybe five options she really had and I narrowed it down to one. I was really, really involved. And I don't generally car we're talking about an off road vehicle.
Yeah, it's a four wheel off road vehicle. But unlike an ATV, I. Maybe I'm deluding myself, but unlike an ATV, I think it's really safe because it's you're in a roll cage as long as you don't have your hands or arms out, like if you keep all your limbs within the cage, yeah. You're going to be safe.
And can you guys see that? You probably can't see that. You see all those holes on top of my hand. I rolled one recently and got a bunch of pins in my hand and then got them removed a week ago because he put his hand down, because I put my hand up. You remember one thing.
I tell people exactly what they get in it. OK, do you guys feel closer at all to me?
And are you people so OK, so really quick, Mike, you're in Malibu.
And Adam, where are you? You know, I'm around Adam.
I'm going to save by the fact that there's no detail behind you. My theory is you're actually in a closet that Kathleen has locked you in a closet. I know I'm in a real room. Oh, yeah, I see a popcorn ceiling.
There's nothing on the wall that for some reason. Yeah. Why does it have a cottage cheese ceiling?
OK, I'm judging from the flora outside. You are on the West Coast. I'm in Pasadena. Fantastic.
And Adam, are you generally this cold in interviews or is it just me or is there something about me that's triggering you or this is just generally how you are?
It's Mike. I'm bringing out this side of you. Right. Just out of kindness and reciprocity. Where are you?
I'm in Los Feliz in an attic above a garage of a house we've been building for three years and will likely build for the rest of our lives.
So what's your quarantine situation? Because I notice that you are not six feet. You're not wearing masks. What's going on? Have you been quarantined?
Yeah, we've been we've been doing the whole thing together two months, two plus months at this point. Prior to the epidemic, Monica lived at our house because she was having different medical issues. And so we were housing her and then it started and we are already all living together. So actually, I was I was shooting in Austin.
I had to come home then I had to self quarantine for a week at her apartment, which was deserted. And then I got invited back into the family home. And now we're we all just took the antibody tests and none of us have it. Unfortunately, I was really I'd fingers crossed, I had had it. You guys done an antibody test? I have not yet.
But the thing is, I haven't had the flu in, you know, so so, yes, there's a chance that that was flying back and forth to New York constantly.
The whole end of twenty nineteen into the beginning of twenty twenty. Yeah. So sure is our chance. I was exposed to it, absolutely.
But I would have had to then remain completely asymptomatic also I guess.
Which happens. Yeah. Which happens. So I watch your documentary last night which is fantastic.
Your voice when you said you and I watched you did the high pitched thing which to me denotes maybe stretching of the truth.
Yeah. And you look down, which is, you know, I look down, I look down to see if I wrote the name of it anywhere, which I stupidly did. It's just called Beastie Boys. Right. That's all I typed into Apple. And it came up.
Mysterious story. Yeah. Story as if that's going to change anything.
But again, if if you get Beastie out, it'll sell fill in boys and story. So really, all I need to tell people to type in Beastie into their Apple TV, which is what I did. And I was so delighted watching it for so many reasons. Because my experience with you guys is I'm from Detroit.
I was very into the hardcore scene when fight for your right to party came out, I was like, oh, I don't like that.
It's like booze, frat culture, blah, blah, blah. It was just popular. And I wanted to do anything that wasn't popular, so I didn't ever give it a chance. And then as things progressed, I fell in love with you guys. And of course, probably like so many people through the sabotage video and Spike Jones and all that, I just was like, oh, these guys are everything I want to be. And then some.
And then I was really kind of delighted to watch the story of you. And it was so informative. Like, I know who Rick Rubin is. I've been to that Shangrila studio and the guy I met these super spiritual.
So I never seen him when you guys met him. So to see that footage of you guys meeting him at NYU and his persona back then and just all the people that have moved through your journey, the Beastie Boys journey is so impressive, so many incredibly talented people that you guys kind of just stumbled upon and were open to work with.
And it's the story is as much about the world in which you guys inhabited and fostered as it is about you guys, which I think is phenomenal.
Thank you for your takeaway, because I know that was one of our ambitions in both our book and then the stage show and then the resulting film directed by Spike Jonze was to show that everything we've done is all about context, the inspiration, the seed, just even the idea that we thought that we could do what we what we can do and very minimal fear going up on stage is kids reading r our rap lyrics from a piece of paper which does not look very good on film when.
We have to look back at it on stage now, that was all a result of the fact that we we grew up in the New York City that we grew up in. It was the 1970s when we were like little kids. And it's just this thing of all our parents had decided to stay in New York City. And if you are a parent and you decided to raise your family in New York City at that time, for the most part, I think the understood condition, one of the conditions was you were going to give your kids the freedom to just go out and do whatever.
There's this movement like, you know, free range parenting. And it's basically just what you all were doing or like Anthony Kiedis and Fli were doing in L.A. like there's these perfect caldrons for this. Yeah.
I mean, I don't think our parents had a term for it just now. We look at it as negligence. Then it was normal, then it was just that's normal. That's how you did it. Yeah.
There's a total bravery like when I'm watching you guys because some of you met at a show like a bad brain show or something. And I remember like my brother, my older brother took me to see Exploited when I was 11 and it was downright dangerous. Like I was 11. I was fucking terrified. My brother was like, be careful. Some guys put screws in the bottom of their combat boots so they break your ankle and you're bashing all this crazy law.
And I was so attracted to this danger of it. And I just remember feeling very vulnerable at 11.
And so I was watching you little kids in that scene and I was like, oh, yeah, I remember that. Like being drawn to that.
Yeah. I was basically like that kid, like when I met Adam SMK at a bad brain show, you know, I was sort of, you know, your counterpart, right? Yeah.
I was like this kid and I was way too shy to even talk to anybody. So I was there with this with Chonburi, who I went to school with, who was the original guitar player and Beastie Boys.
And Jon was a lot more socially capable than I was probably than I am now.
He became your social liaison.
Yeah, well, there was only one other kid. Interestingly, like, you know, it's also there was like maybe two dozen people there right at this show.
It wasn't like hardcore. It was such a big deal to us.
We thought it was going to be a really big deal. Oh, yeah. Yeah. But it turned out on like a Tuesday night in some small bar in Manhattan.
There's only like twenty people there. And out of that twenty there was only one other kid that was our age and that was. Yeah. You know, we were all probably, I don't know, fifteen years old or something.
Yeah. And there were all these things that I felt personally I could really relate to. And one of them was like the first incarnation of you guys licensed to ill. It seems a little bit and correct me if I'm wrong, that in order to overcome the barrier of humiliation, right.
To be brave enough to get on a stage and to do something, it's almost like it required a character to protect everyone. And I wondered if there was like it consciously or unconsciously or in retrospect, do you recognize that you guys were maybe like adopting characters so that if that person burned alive on stage, it wouldn't really be you would be that character you created?
You know, I don't think you think that type stuff when you're a teenager. But, you know, speaking for me, like we we did become characters. Right? These are fantasy kind of things of what we wanted to be in a way. And, you know, when you get attention for something, you know, you just keep doing it. Yeah. Because people are like, oh, that's I like that. And you're like, I like being liked.
Yeah, of course. I was even thinking, like, when you guys got invited very early on to open for Madonna and you guys decided like, OK, so our thing is going to be were obnoxious rock stars. Right. So in all the interviews we're going to be obnoxious and all. And I just wonder if that was almost a self defense mechanism about like, wait, who the fuck are we to be opening for Madonna?
We we need some character. Was there any fear or. No, because the three of you were together. Did you just feel like invulnerable?
And the Madonna context are two things are happening. And I remember we would talk with Rick about this. The thing was like, all right, we're going to go on stage. And these girls, look, they're all there to see Madonna. Nobody's there to see us. So they're probably not going to like us, but hopefully they're not going to forget us.
Yeah, yeah, yeah. We're going to make a name for ourselves. How can you get something out of this? Yeah.
And then I do think there's there's this other thing that I actually oddly, I think back on it because it served us well through our whole art of being a band from that beginning, like opening up from Madonna to whatever towards even the very end when I was ill.
I don't know how else to put it, but it's like a group mentality. There's something about being in a group. We are always just looking to make the other two guys laugh. I'm so grateful that we had that because that buffered us from any one of us.
We're in it alone. Maybe be like, what is the rest of the world?
Think of me.
We didn't really have to give a shit about that because what we cared about so much more were the two friends. That where we are in it with, OK, Rick Rubin, this was news to me, I guess I thought I because I've always associated him with you guys. I thought he was along for the entire ride. It was news to me that he was not after license to ill.
What can you say about obviously then you have no sense that he'll become Rick Rubin. But were you noticing some kind of genius? Were you like, oh, this guy is he has some something kind of special? Like, it's really weird that you guys bumped into one of what became the biggest producers and then also Spike Jones you bump into and he ends up directing her like there's a lot of you guys bumping into people who proved to be kind of the best in that field.
And I'm always curious if you had a sense of it in the moment or it was later revealed.
So were tastemakers. Is that well, you could have been like scouts for baseball. Like you guys know how to fucking find talent, that's for sure. Yeah.
Yeah. We're like Moneyball before Moneyball.
And we met Rick Rubin just because we were playing a show and we needed a bubble machine. And so our friend Nick Cooper said, oh, I know this guy has a bubble machine. And then we're like, oh, we could have a DJ. That'd be cool. And then so that's how we met him. And and then as far as going on for a long career and, you know, producing something about Rick when we were that age, it was interesting.
We all all of us kids wanted to be in bands. But like, I didn't know any kids that were like, oh, I want to produce.
Yeah, yeah. It's a very weird pursuit at that age. Right. And so, Rick, there's definitely something about Rick that I can't like, especially not the word special is kind of a word. But at that time he had a real persona to himself and it was kind of electrifying.
Yeah, he was older than you guys to. Right. Two years.
He was all of like two years older than us. But when you're that age, like in high school and he's in college and we're going to his dorm room, that was a really big deal to us.
Right. That's enough that we couldn't believe that.
You know, here we're in Greenwich Village anyway, like walking.
But the fact that we're going into a college dorm is like a big deal because we're in high school for sure.
And to just add to what Adam was saying, like, I think it's interesting, Rick had a certain confidence in himself and a conviction, like even more than the confidence was like this, this conviction in his ideas that was actually kind of infectious when I think back of it.
That's something we hadn't seen.
Well, you were in the phase of trying to find your voice, right. And here's a guy that seems to know what his voice to go back to that Madonna thing when we were going, I'm going to go on tour with Madonna. You know, we just assumed everybody would hate us. And when you're a punk rocker, like, that's fine.
Well, we actually assumed correctly, Adam. Right. But I'm saying.
So when you're a punk rocker, that's fine. Of course they're going to hate us. That's cool that they hate us. But something about Rick Rubin, like he introduced things that were similar to what we were into, but like different like he was really into wrestling. Right. Right. So we were trying to think of, like, what can we do that would, you know, stand out? He's like, oh, you should do this, like, wrestling shtick.
And we're like, OK, yeah.
And he was very much playing the manager, too.
Rick was obsessed with. And, you know, I mean, he'll talk about it himself now, but he was obsessed with wrestling. I mean, at that time was this weird combination of heavy metal wrestling.
Rap music, punk rock, and even then, he had, like I remember, he had like this like yoga poster on his on his wall of his dorm room, like of all these different yoga postures.
And it was really it was like, what is that?
You know, like I just remember as a kid, as a teenager, like I had never seen anything like that.
I don't even know what I thought of it, honestly, because it was just so, so sort of funny.
And it was like sex positions poster. Yeah, that's what that's what I thought as well. What I first saw it.
And then the other weird thing, the person that starts managing is Russell Simmons, who at that time what he just managed Run DMC because his brother was in Run DMC.
Yeah, Russell had been a hip hop promoter and his brother, Joe Run from Run DMC was like an aspiring really good emcee from Queens. And then Russell managed Kurtis Blow and Run DMC kind of became a thing. Then Rick met Russell first. But when Rick met Russell, like Russell was the biggest name in the rap music business, although rap music business then is not rap music business. Twenty twenty it is. It's you know, there's a really niche thing that's just at that point.
It just like started happening in downtown New York, maybe was in Philadelphia, maybe got down to Virginia a little bit. And that's like I don't even think rap music had gotten to Detroit yet. Like, it's like literally the geographic reach of rap music was was really, really still very limited at that time.
But he managed a bunch of rap groups from New York, Run DMC, Whodini, all the best, Kurtis Blow, all the biggest rap group.
So we are Spider Dude. Come on, you're like my my Sparky D, Sparky D, Jimmy Spicer. Yeah, not EPMD, Spidy, EPMD.
Now did he did he know he did Magpantay or EPMD. That was later though.
D was a big letter. Yeah. Yeah. I'm part of the I'm part of the family. Yeah. Yeah you are. I'm a proud member.
So when you look is it disillusioning at all because yeah. Russell Simmons goes on to be a billionaire and you know, Rick goes on to do what Rick does and it's all on your first album. Do you ever go like that's nuts that all these people we just were hustling with became the institution?
No, I mean, I think our what we felt was actually very different than that, right? Because what we felt was we meet Rick, we're spending all of this time in his NYU dorm room and making beats on what were his drum machines and learning to use his equipment and then going to this, like, crappy studio in Chinatown to start making our record with him, which became licensed to ill. And so it was really this feeling of we're in it all together and this is our click and now we belong.
And, you know, Rick and Russell are like Adam uses this term a lot like they were our weird older brothers, you know. So we really had this, like, family thing or that feeling.
And then, you know, then, of course, look, first off, were 18, 19 years old. So then all that money comes into the thing and success. And obviously then it turns out what we want is very different than what Russell wants because Russell just wants money.
Yeah. He wants to have you guys on the road. Probably he just wants us to be like a circus act and just keep performing and keep making people happy. And it's fight for right to party is what makes people happy. Well, then just keep doing that. Like, I don't want to hear about it and make fight for our party. And I don't want to talk to you until you've done that again.
If you guys ever thought about what your experience would be like had you been dealing with that as an individual, because like recently, I interviewed Alicia Keys and Sheryl Crow and like three or four huge female artists and they talk about like how insanely isolating it is, like you're just on the road.
You're never anywhere. That's yours. And increasingly, people around you have different roles. It sounds like maybe you guys would have been safeguarded from that in some way because you had each other. But even with with each other, did it feel like you were losing touch with real life for us?
Yeah, well, yeah, because you fatigue that's in the documentary. You guys eventually did fatigue, right?
Yeah, it became completely surreal because it's like this thing that we are, especially in our case, because it was like with Phifer to party and and then sort of having to play these roles that we talked about earlier.
It's all sudden. We're expected to be that all the time.
Well, you guys were kind of making fun of, as you say, like frat fraternity culture. And yet the show was made up of like brose. There was a little dissonance there, right? Like, oh, while the brothers loved it.
Yeah. But it was it does this weird feeling like kind of built up inside of us, right? I was like, holy shit, this is not the people that we saw in these downtown New York City clubs on stage that inspired us that we so desperately wanted to become like we are on stage.
We're like, well, we're not that anymore. We're not like these people courageously making whatever they want to make. We're like now these actors doing this thing that we only feel a part of, not wholeheartedly that thing.
And yeah, it was weird. It was it was a very surreal feeling.
I think it's like that feeling is really what fatigued us and made us feel like we need to take a break here. And then, you know, it's funny looking back at it, it just seems totally human for us to want to take a break at that point. Right. Where, like 18, 19 years old, we've been on this for me at that point twenty. We've been on this hamster wheel trying to spin it around as fast as we can.
And we're just like, go to Russell. Like we we need a break from this. Now, we can't keep doing this. And Russell was like, no, no, no, you got to make and make another record right away. It's like completely nuts when you look back at it. That's his lack of maturity. At that point, he didn't know how to manage for any kind of long term because there what he hadn't been through any long term yet.
But to go back to your question, yes, it definitely was a lot easier for us to manage things as a group, being friends and also being in the band. So if you were isolated as just the lead singer or solo performer, I don't know what that's like. It must be really difficult. It must be really lonely a lot, because even when great things happen, you're still standing up there by yourself, you know what I mean?
Yeah. You can't look next to you and go, wow, we're sharing this together.
So we're really fortunate that it was the three of us doing it. Yeah. And when bad things happen, you don't have that person to look over just like it's only bad. Like there's just all the stuff that happens when you're in a band and probably when you're a solo artist, too. That's truly fucking weird.
And you and so I was so grateful that I had out of it out of it so we could look at each other, give each other's look alike.
This is weird to you as it is to me right now. It's really fucking weird. And then also, again, I'm male.
I'm not female.
But I think for being a female in that position, it's got to suck even more because it's like there's you've got people that are trying to patronize you and you're expecting other things from you.
You know, it's got to be worse. Yeah. You're in a machine that tells you to put on a miniskirt. You know, at some point you're like one of the best singers and piano players alive and they're telling you to put on a miniskirt.
Now, the other thing that I've always associated with you guys in knowing next to nothing once I watched the documentary is like you guys do have this this kind of guiding ethics. And I knew that about you, even from the outside like that trickled down even to me that you guys you were thinking about, like were the rally cry for this group that's do we want to be the rally cry for this group? And what group would we like to be the rally cry for?
And I think it's what's made you guys really unique. And I imagine it's part of what sustains you guys through many, many years of it is that you were constantly evaluating your role in all this and being self aware. It did bother you that you were like fueling something you didn't agree with.
Right. Or that you maybe like you had written a song that was by now standards misogynistic. And then, Adam, you were quick to go like to own that and say, I'm embarrassed by that.
Like, that wasn't really I've never heard I don't know Steven Tyler come out and go like, yeah, you know, I don't know, maybe that line is fantastic.
Now, we should we should call Steven Tyler out. I don't want to call him right here right now.
I think you should do one of those producer like beats battles with Steven Tyler. I just I'm trying to think of something to do with Steven Tyler. That's about all right here. I was going to say Instagram skat battle. Hell yes. Get obviously stupid.
So battles, when are they coming back?
You know, I don't I haven't seen any maybe because of covid. They're just they're not they're not out there right now. Fucking Kobe.
Stay tuned for more armchair expert, if you dare.
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I want to compare you to one other group that I was fascinated with is the pop culture skaters in search for Animal Chen. Did you guys like that video? There was an infusion of comedy with you guys that was so great and it happened.
It seems like we were of a generation where that was the first time it was possible and you guys were leading it somehow on the musical front. And there are other groups. But and then even within skateboarding, like embracing comedy as part of it, I think is pretty original at that time.
And in some way, I'm honored for the comparison. Right. Because we like these New York City kids that like kind of skateboarding to get around. And for us, like Powell, Peralta, like those guys were like huge deals to us. For us, the being funny was always important, still is important to us, even like with Spike through this whole process of like the stage show in the film, we kind of argue with them all the time.
We'd be like, wait, Spike, is this funny enough?
Like, is this really going to entertain? Like, that was always an important thing. And I think there's something for us like as kids, like you always love Monty Python and we all as kids growing up, we all had a copy of Monty Python's Big Red Book, which the cover, of course, famously is blue on one of the few books I actually owned as a kids have comedy records.
Now, is that a thing that kids do?
Because when we were kids, they watch YouTube clips of comedians. We had Cheech and Chong records, we had Steve Martin records, we had Richard Pryor records, all these records. But, you know, and you play songs and then you play comedy and then you play music and comedy and they go platinum.
Those albums, like there's some huge, huge comedy.
Rodney Dangerfield, come on. Yeah.
Sandler's had humongous comedy albums. He was like kind of the last, I think, Hanukkah song.
Sandler was kind of the probably the last huge comedy album, probably. Adam, what interests you.
Wow. Snacks. Snacks. I'm going with snacks right now. OK, now snacks.
Well and something else. Adam Puzzle's I'd say you're an avid puzzle doer. I'm fucking quarantined Mike.
What if I have to stay home? I have something I haven't done. One puzzle in quarantine, not one you done how? Who knows how many, Mike?
You know you know what happened the other day. Look at this. I'm not talking to you, Mike. I wish I could put my hand just over. You know, I got a puzzle in the mail with no note attached. And it's from Mike. Yeah, he sent me a gift.
That's nice. That's so sweet. Really nice. He's got a new name. Thoughtful. Mike, was it a puzzle of you guys together? You can have puzzles of our friend.
Janelle actually made a puzzle, a mini puzzle of me. And that was great. That was great. Yeah.
I'm interested in snacks is what you want to know. And I think right now the top of the list is sour cream and onion soup mix and ruffles.
Oh, we are not going to believe this will. Literally. Last week I went to the store and I got all the shit for French onion dip and ruffles particularly.
And we murdered the family size bag and a jug of it. But was it good? There's nothing like it.
And how do you describe how you felt, both of you afterwards? Oh, horrendous.
You know why it was me. You bring down Mike like we're up here. Listen, Mike, I used to alter my 20s. I was drunk seven days a week, did Coke, only a 7-Eleven, hot dogs and felt phenomenal. Now I'm fifteen years sober. I don't smoke. I don't do anything. And I eat ruffles and I'm down for a day. It's insane. I don't know how my body used to be so bulletproof and now I'm so sensitive to potatoes.
I too I think all through high school I probably I ate a bag. I don't want to say Ruffels every day. Sometimes it was wise.
I know. So I don't think there was not a day right in high school or when we'd meet up like the wreckage or whatever.
Adam, there's not a day that I didn't eat a bag of chips.
Know, Mike, I was not clocking how many bags of chips you ate.
I thought you kept a food to go. You kidding me? I love like I thought you were logging my car.
Take all the way back in nineteen Thursday, February 14th. Mike eating fucking chips again.
He's got to eat a vegetable.
I keep begging him to eat a vegetable and he just won't do it.
OK, I want to know how did the dynamic between you three, because I have a similar friendship with three dudes. There's three of us, two of them are Arun's and they have to go by their last names, Weekly and Tyrel.
And there's just this beautiful synergy that exists between the three. Generally, I think three's a bad number for people because. Who always ganging up on one, but sometimes when it works, it's so phenomenal, right? You can kind of pass that ball of like agitation can just be dissipated somehow.
How did you all's dynamic change when Adam died? Like, what role did he serve in the triangle that took adjusting?
Well, I mean, we stopped being a band, so there wasn't as much to do. Right.
That's the short answer. Yeah. How about when you guys were together? Did you have a role from the documentary?
At least he seems to be kind of like the spiritual wanderer of the group like that. He was just would get interested in stand up bass or you get interested in recording and he'd know things. And you guys were like, when did he learn that? Because we're together all the time. And yet he knows this thing and we don't. So it's such a clear role.
It seems that he had it is that but also he had this older brother ness, which actually does come out of partially, I think, out of the fact that, like, when you're all, you know, 15 years old, the fact that he is like more than a year older than me and then two years older than Adam is actually a big deal when you're when you're 15 years old. But then also and Adam and I talk about this often, was that we are the youngest of multi sibling households, right.
Where the both the youngest of three kids and Yayuk was this only child. So we'd grown up our whole lives just being at the bottom, you know, shortest straw, bottom of the barrel of compromise. Right. Because that's what you are when you're the youngest kid. But, yeah, it was free of all that. So any idea that he would have he would just pursue without giving it a second thought or questioning the process. Adam and I had to always question it because we knew, like, we try to pursue something and we don't do it right.
Like one of my older brothers is going to make fun of me in seconds and make me feel horrible.
Yeah, I'm a younger brother, and as I would be doing something, I'm also actively planning my defense for it. When I get made fun of, like I'm spending as much time hearing my rebuttal to all things as I am doing the activity. One hundred percent.
I'm just like calculating, waiting to like one of my older brother, just going to literally sit on me and make Ayanami.
So call you a homosexual pejorative. Yeah. Yeah.
Because it was free of that. Right. You just go straight into the idea without any of the luggage.
Would you say that he led you guys in all these new directions because you kept reinventing yourselves, or was it just this collective magic where you guys were always curious and finding yourself in new places? I think Jack was more of a world traveler like like you said, and maybe he led the way for all three of us. But the great thing and I think one of the appreciations that Adam and I have for us for that we had this whole long career as a group together, is that we we had this this group where we could all go and learn stuff and bring it back in and and put it right into the songs and right into the music that we were making.
And unlike anybody's experience of like when we having older brothers, it was like we we actually supported each other in that, you know.
What was that? Wow. Well, this is all this is all time below you. You just learn how to use this chat function just now.
Yeah. OK. All right. I don't know if you have checked your credit.
I'm dyslexic. I came up with I want to see it.
It's a note to read them to the group. Hey, you guys, I'm really sorry about Mike.
Oh, this is a first in our and our Zoome podcast. We no one's chatted so far. That's true.
Do you have to have two people on I. Adam, I got to say kudos.
Kudos to you. You know, we broke a barrier. So that's what I'm that's what I'm here for, Mike.
It hurts me, as you know, to compliment you. But I'm going to thank you for my puzzle.
But here's what I'm getting at, is that you guys had this incredible shared identity for years. And then when you lose one member of that identity, well, first and obviously the band goes away.
But then I would imagine so much of your personal identity is tied to the band and what kind of process you go through in the wake of that.
What is the process of dealing with your one of your best friends that you've seen basically every day for 35 years? Crying Yeah, for sure.
There's no process. There's no you know, just if you can if you have a specific process, I don't know if you're doing it right. It just comes out. You just said it's just fucking sad.
There's no rhyme or reason to it. But I understand that people in the world know me because of this band. Right. And so it is weird. And it's it's a kind of unexplainable thing, really, because then it goes back to the thing of like, am I me or am I the person who's this person in a band? And, you know, what's the line? Is there a separation? You know what I mean? But when your friend dies, like there's no there's no separation.
Yeah. So it's just really fucking sad, but even when you close your eyes, do you not think I'm a Beastie Boy like I was? I remember seeing Mick Jagger on stage saying something like, if you want to learn to live a long time, become a Rolling Stone. And I was like, oh, yeah. He gets to say, he is a Rolling Stone.
He is. But then what about Brian Jones just saying, well, OK, I'm trying to build a broader point.
You just crumble.
But but but but but but you know, I'm older, you know, I mean, I've been through a lot. If Beastie Boys broke up and weren't in a band, you know, I'd be OK. Like, we'd figure it out. Me, Adam and Mike would still be friends. Like, it would just wouldn't be doing this thing. And we were very successful and very happy and, you know, in my life.
So I'm OK. Yeah, you know what I mean. But it's sad. It's just sad.
Yeah. Well, I think it's also because you're talking about like even towards the end when Jack was doing treatments for his cancer and it was like we would go to the studio every day because he wanted to because that was the thing of like we wanted to be around each other.
And so somehow, yeah, we're still alive. And we had stopped being a band. It wouldn't have been because we didn't want to be with each other. It would have been somehow maybe we didn't we didn't feel genuine or authentic in making music or whatever, or we were just more into whatever the thing would have been.
But it wouldn't have been because we didn't. Want to be with each other and I think more probable than anything else, we would still keep doing it because we really look forward to that time of being with each other. And that's the unique thing in this whole weird friggin frigging thing that we did for decades of our lives.
And now I'm going to ask something that could be really offensive. And I apologize, but I just I'm not hip to it because I'm into comedy.
Oh, big, big disclaimer. Big disclaimer. Are you still making music? That's the part I'm afraid is going to offend you. That I don't know.
Why is that bad? Well, because you could have both. I like solo hit albums that I missed and then it's all right.
All right. Yeah. Yeah. You didn't hear don't. I didn't want to like your Walter Becker and I don't know about our manager.
My personal management talked about this. That's why I'm doing this. So I agreed to do this.
You're obviously not a fan of the L.A. Philharmonic or poetry slams because then you know what I'm doing all the time, Mike.
My guess is just that you work out in Laird Hamilton's pool. That's my singular guess about what you're doing. I put some time in there.
And what do you think I'm doing? Eating fucking ruffles in my basement? I don't have a basement. So I think, boy, let me look at you.
Let me look. I mean, I think I can make a pretty good. You ask. Well, let me just ask Mike D have you ever worked out Laird Hamilton's pool for real question.
For real. Yes.
OK, so that's a pretty amazing guy, right? I don't know. How do I know that you probably knew already. I don't know. I did not know that. And Adam, you're in Pasadena. So my guess for you is one of your neighbors is like a legend at JPL and you've gone over to the Jet Propulsion Laboratory and taken a tour. Has this happened?
I have not had to for you. Oh, my God. Is that rehabber, though?
Not my neighbor. Somebody I met once was like, I work at Jet Propulsion Lab. I was like, oh, shit, I really want to go. He said, The Mars rover is there. Yeah. So you went right, you wouldn't go see the Mars rover.
I've been to JPL because I wrote a movie about had a lot to JPL shit. And so I got to go there and like talk to people. So you've written a movie about JPL.
I have to say I and this is totally tangential. And with Adam on this Zoome call, it's extremely dangerous for me to even go into this territory.
So I'll give a disclaimer that I might have to text you afterwards to say, like a race, the the whole hard disk. Now, what was the thing?
Are you saying that I'm masturbating right now with a bag of ruffles on the couch? I knew it. I knew that I paid for the chair.
I did not put that in the chat. So that wasn't it.
That was started by one guy and like his sort of counterpart or that was doing something else. Was L. Ron Hubbard Scientology connection?
Well, Andy hung out with Alistair Crawley and they were all in the right. You pull in like. Yeah, in the twenties and thirties. And like I just read Strange Angels.
I forget the guy's name. But yes, he basically was he was into science fiction. And all those guys kind of like the L. Ron Hubbard because he wrote only science fiction and this guy was blowing shit up in the arroyo in Pasadena. And he was the only person that had a sense of what kind of rocket fuel would make the rockets work. So he was brought in. He wasn't an academic, but he became like the best engineer there. And he ultimately blew himself up in his garage in Pasadena and died.
But I wish I could remember that guy's name.
But anyway, strange new chat, but I can't read it and everyone.
Hey, guys, I'm really sorry, but what is it? Say hi, guys. Sorry about that. OK, ok. OK, ok. All right. OK, ok. I got some games.
You know Bridget Everett is do I. Yeah. Know who's better.
And comedian Google Bridget Everett is she's made performer and me and Bridget and our friends were playing. We had a band for a while that was blending music and comedy and all of that.
Oh, I want to hear that. Didn't know that. Yeah. Yeah, I want to hear that. So there you go.
Adam Lambert, hold on. Land the plane on that. Where were you going with that. Like you just I don't know got.
No, no he was so what he's been doing since. Yeah. Mike you got his these questions, he starts these questions and then it's like another five minutes of tangents. I'm just trying to I'm trying to keep I am trying to land a plane.
Don't say I'm trying to like hold it to get it all back together. Speaking tangents. John and Judy Gartmann. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. Yes, big fan and I don't know who that podcast. Oh, you listen to that. All right. With him.
Yeah, I aspire to do the things they're recommending to keep married, and I wish I were that smart. But the Gutman's it's really interesting to me that his whole story that he was this MIT mathematician, my therapist give me like materials for that Gottman Institute.
But I didn't know his background of being at MIT, a mathematician and then applying statistical research to relationships. But yeah, it just seems to make all the sense in the world.
So I don't know what this is going to want to talk about. So this is a real tangential I can give you, Adam, the one liner that'll have you interested so he can watch. He's been studying since the 80s. Married couples have conversations, films them he can predict with 80 percent accuracy within five minutes of watching them talk if they'll get divorced.
Yeah, I can. To ya. It's hard, you know. You fucking kidding me? Tell me that's difficult. I think it's difficult. Yeah.
To watch two people talk for five minutes and go, you're going to make it or not and to be right.
You can't. You tell me you can't do that. I bet I could do it with like 60 percent accuracy. You just said that you knew what type of person I am and why you did make a couple accurate.
Pretty well, I made a couple of. Yeah, yeah. But I think that leans more to that. I'm a savant like John Gottman then just it was random and everyone could do it.
Can you guess one thing I've done? I just picked two spectacular events that happened to almost no one working on in Laird Hamilton's pool and touring JPL. Make a prediction about me.
I got I've got one hundred percent.
OK, you you've worked on. Building your own motorcycle, but did not you did not actually complete it by yourself. You needed help. Oh, my God. And that is not right. But what a great underhanded. Yes, yeah. No, I mostly work on cars and I complete them all.
And you have ridden that motorcycle which eventually got completed with somebody else's help?
No, I'm sticking with my conviction. I have old old cars and new motorcycles because I don't think I want to have a part fall off on a two wheeler. I think you that's why I don't mind.
Wheel falls off. OK, well, you guys, you have the label and you guys ended up putting out OK, so they have this beautiful part of the documentary.
Monica, you didn't see the beginning, but their best friend when they were kids was this gal, Kate, and she played the drums and they were all together. And they very honestly own the fact that they just dumped her when they got involved with Rubin and Russell Simmons and then they felt terrible about it. And then they went to a mutual friends funeral and it kind of all brought them back together. And she, by your guys, his admission was just totally cool, ready to pick back up and no hard feelings.
And you guys got close again and then they ended up starting a label and put out her music. Oh, wow. That's a lovely story now.
Yeah, well, and to add a chapter, she now works for James Corden. Oh, and we were on James Corden a couple of weeks ago.
And then I was like, kind of funny because she did the pre interview with us and we got here and she's this really old friend of ours having to ask us, you know, do her job right.
But to be on topic, it was so interesting talking to her then, because I give her just so much credit. She really doesn't harbor any ill will. You know, she really is like totally fine with being friends and the kindest way she has every right to feel.
However, she wants to feel she's pissed off. She can be totally pissed off. I basically we went low and she went high. And it's you know, she's a great person. Yeah. And we're lucky to be friends with her.
Last thing I want to talk about is how cute you are, Adam.
I mean, you're so cute, but you were you know, it is a bummer is that I never went into that, like, hunk phase. Can we talk about how cute you were for one second?
I know. I know what happened. I know I never I should have worked out or something. Shit, it's not too late.
And you could go to lairds pool. You got to get over there.
You got to go. I'm going to do it. His pool you're going to stare at he and his wife's beautiful physique can just go like, fuck, I'll never look like this. Let's do it.
Yeah, but I can do that from here. Can I see you now?
Did you want to be an actor? I did. You did. Yeah. In eighty four for a couple of years I was going on, I had an agent, I was going on auditions and all of that stuff. Yeah. And it turns out I'm a I'm a pretty bad actor I guess.
Do you think of yourself as retired. I fantasize about retiring pretty often and then I wonder like in my underestimating how much self esteem I get out of working.
Like if there's anybody I know who takes away very little self esteem in any of the work you do and you are good at what you do, it's you. You suffer from zero esteem. Take away. It's all here, Mike.
Then what gives you esteem. Adam yo my fucking chicken wings. I'm calling it right now. Yes. Are you using an air fryer. I just bake them.
I got to say it's something with my Dryburgh.
OK, can I implore you to get an air fryer? Because I also have been making wings for a decade in this air fryer. Is it turn the world upside down for me.
How does the air fry it, both of you. Is breading involved here.
No, no, no. But no, no, no. I made ruffles coated chicken the other night. Oh good.
We should do that. Is are you sprinkling the soup dry soup as part of the.
No, no ruffles. Just the chips. OK, just so you just grind a roll just like they pound the bag of chips.
So it's all it's a shake and bake. OK. Oh so you put the actually you put the chicken pieces in the bag of ruffles. Oh yeah. Shake it all around. How. Well, Mike, as you know you have to put it in the flour and you know so pepper and all that stuff, shake it up, put it in your egg wash and then put those in your ruffles.
But I mean a lot of them. And then you put that in the bake that hold the presses.
DAX here has a innovation that he thinks we would both better fry. OK, yeah.
So here's what you do. You open up that thing with wings. I put this dry rub on. It's a spicy one. And then I spray it with olive oil. I dump it in the air fryer. I hit one button. Twenty minutes later, you would swear to God they came out of a deep fryer. It's the crispy skin you've ever tasted in the fucking meat. Could not be damper. Really good. It's the moist meat I've ever had in my life.
It's crispy and moist and you can't you can even put it in there longer than they recommend. It just gets crisp. It never loses the moisture, but it's impossible, it doesn't have a skin like fried chicken has a skin, let's be fair about that, right. Like if you got, like, KFC, it's not the same. Well, there's no breading, right? Exactly.
But it is crispy and it is moist and it is delicious.
I really recommend you get yourself a Phillips were not sponsored by them, but I've gotten love four of them, and that's definitely the best one. It's smaller. You're gonna have to make smaller batches, just deal with it. But the product is to die for.
He's given them out as presents because I got a big enough, I got a small one. I was like, this is amazing, but I can only make six wings at a time.
So then I got this huge one and I was like, oh no. Yeah, that's crazy.
Like this sucks. So and then I found a Phillips came up with an L version. I can probably make about ten wings at once. Now I can live with that and I just do batches so I eat them for 20 minutes as the next batch is cooking.
OK, if you know, if you want to send one over.
I have bought several for friends already. Put me on the list. OK, ok. I'll get a hold of you through. Wags sisters, sister wives, one sister.
Just call up the Polaris Dealer Arthur and.
Well listen, I love you guys and the documentary is fantastic. It really, really is fun. And I learned so, so much.
I guess my only this is a juicy question.
Did you guys end on bad terms with those guys or just feel like you are dealing out with them? Yeah, but did you end it up over the years or are. No, I harbor resentment. You did on to things. Do you do it? That's like a character trait for you, Adam.
You know, it was part of the year thing, like being grumpy and having resentments. That's like that's your go to do.
I look like I'm getting.
Can I can I give you a saying? We say a lot maybe exists elsewhere, but having resentments is like drinking poison, hoping your enemy dies. Yeah. I found that to be painfully true, you know, it is true, it is true. I actually don't you know, people that I personally I'm talking about me have had a falling out with or, you know, whatever. It doesn't affect my life. Do you know what I mean?
Like Rick Rubin. Hey, do you think Russell Simmons would like at the time, I was very angry and it hurt. Yeah.
That's like we were hurt in the sense of, like what I talked about before, that it just felt so much like family. So to have people that you thought had your back. Yeah. And that we're doing this thing with you to then be like, hey, well, if you guys don't do this well and screw you.
And also full disclosure, you know, I'm friends with Rick, right. Russell, I haven't seen in years and no idea. And thinking back, you know, and Rick also became disenchanted sort of around the same time we did.
And he bounced out of the whole Def Jam thing. And it just it was no longer something he wanted to be part of.
But, you know, he also said, I do think this is an interesting thing is ultimately, like Rick said this to me, like after coming to see one of the early iterations that became this film, is it kind of like the reason we can still talk about it is that like we as a band, we got what we wanted.
We want to just like make what we want to make and be friends. And I mean, Rick Rick's statement was like, you guys became this iconic band. And he's like, I always wanted to be a producer and I got to be the producer and work with all these different artists. So I'm really grateful at that.
And he's like, you know, Russell just wanted to get paid and he got paid.
Right. Everyone kind of got what they wanted.
I mean, for a very small amount of time, it did benefit each other. And then that it's interesting that I could then explode. Yeah. For a whole bunch of reasons. And then everybody goes their own way and gets gets what they want. You guys were all very young.
No, we were really young and I was only 19. Certainly didn't have the communication skills.
Don't blame yourself for these things, Mike. Come on. It's not you. It's not me for sure, but it's not you. They stop paying your royalty.
Did that get resolved? Did you guys have to sue them? I assume you got paid on license to ill, right? I got nervous.
No, we got totally screwed over. We did not like it. Totally worked out. We got totally screwed over and we had to sue everybody and everybody had to sue us. Oh, yeah. But then, yes, eventually, you know, Def Jam got bought by Universal.
We have gone on to make a lot of money, but we we we make a lot of money for Universal. So conversely, they then now we get paid like a normal artist would from a real company that actually pays people. Yeah. Oh that's good. So yeah, all's well that ends well I guess in that way. All right, guys.
Well, thanks so much for talking with us. And I hope everyone checks out the you just type in Beastie Boys. Don't even worry about the title type in Beastie Boys. And you're going to and first thing that's going to pop up is this documentary, and it's really well made. And it's a super interesting story. And you guys fucking won.
Well, all right, guys, having us in your attic. Yeah. Yeah.
Out of attic office. Yeah. What do we what are we supposed to do with the zoom mikes, what I'm keeping other than them off.
It's a present from armchair expert. Happy birthday and Merry Christmas. Oh, man.
Thank you. Yeah. Yeah, that's so nice. I assume you guys don't have access to microphones.
Yeah. I felt like a lot was insinuated when this arrived in there.
All right. Bye, guys. Thank you. Bye bye. You stay safe. Bye bye.
Stay tuned for more armchair expert, if you dare.
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And now my favorite part of the show, the fact check with my soulmate Monica padman.
You got to fight for your right to check facts.
Oh, that's very, very time. It's been a long time. I was good. Had to be done in honor of the boys. The boys. The boys boys are fun.
Yeah, I would have fun. Sharp. They're just Lucy Goosey. They're the Beastie Boys. I like it. Yeah. They wouldn't be the Beastie Boys if they weren't Lucy. That's true. That's true.
They have such a fun relationship.
They really do. It's almost like brothers. Like older brother. Younger brother. Yeah. Yeah. There's a real brothers dynamic. Yeah.
It's cute kid. They're pretty darn cute on stage in that documentary. Yeah.
I didn't, I only saw a little bit of it but I want to keep watching. It looked good.
There's so much great footage that Spike Jones boy what a talented move right now. Oh it's infuriating.
You brought it up. But it's just so cool how they've they've run across all of these people in their careers who end up being just the best. The best. Yeah, totally.
I don't think they take credit for it as much. But that's a thing. That's a thing when you draw talent of that. Yeah.
It's almost like the secret or something. Very, very cool. OK, so can we talk about heights a lot more? Robert Plant, you said is definitely over six feet and they said definitely not. We talked about this on the show itself.
But yeah, the Internet says six one. I don't know what to tell them. Well, I don't know what to tell them. Well, this double confirms as I saw him in Manhattan and he was quite tall. I know.
That's what we were saying. Yeah, I saw him. But we were wondering if he had lifts in his shoes. I don't know if Wikipedia counted lifts in your shoes.
Well, by the way, I think he might have had lifts in his shoes because of his six eyes. I'd swear he was six, two or three.
So if he's really six one and then he had a little help, that makes sense. Maybe he's wearing like a boot. Yeah, rock stars wear a lot of boots.
I can't do it. Boots. Yeah. Do you like boots? Yeah.
Yeah, I guess so. Right now we've ever tried cowboy boots on. I've never owned a pair of cowboy boots. But have you ever tried them on. Yeah. They hurt. Yeah.
I've never owned them but I've tried them on or I've had to wear them in movies or something and I look ridiculous in them. It's not a look I can pull off a sting.
Some guys you see them in the cowboy boots like. Yeah that looks totally right.
Did they look too short or something.
It just looked preposterous. I mean I guess we you just off brand for me cowboy. I don't know. Well you wear a cowboy hat though. That's true. But that's just for sun protection. It's the most practical of all the sunshade hats. Yeah, sure. Well, sombrero, those are pretty heavy. Yeah. Yeah. Like I'll ride around the yard on the quad with a cowboy hat on. I couldn't do that with a sombrero on a rip right off.
Yeah. Those, they're very white. Very, very huge radios. Yeah. Yeah, yeah. All right.
So we'll never know about Wikipedia and what they include and. No I think we know.
So we had two different opinions. Then we went to the Internet and it was it was revealed that I was correct.
Well, no, we'll never know if Wikipedia includes, like Boutte's in their height, you know? Right. No, no, that that's true.
What story are Lilliputians from? I said maybe Huck Finn. That's wrong.
They are from Gulliver's Travels. Oh, sure. I knew was a fantastic story. Sure.
Do you remember what grade you were in when you read Gulliver's Travels?
You want to see six. Same. Same. Yeah, I think six. And I can still see the drawing in my head in the book really clearly of the little people who had strung him to the ground. That's Lilliputians.
Oh that's little. Yeah, they're tiny. Wow. And that's why when people refer to somebody or something being Lilliputian, I mean. Tiny or small? OK. And based solely on Gulliver's Travels, OK. What year was Gulliver's Travels? Seventeen twenty six. Oh my God. Yeah.
Yeah it was written in the late 70s.
No, I know it holds up. I really do. I wonder I'd like to read some of those old things now. They say sixth grade. That actually sounds really young.
I think it might have been older than that.
I was definitely sixth grade and I was at Highland Junior High and I was only there in sixth grade. Hmm. Do you think it got updated for language? I feel like it would sound Elizabethan if I know. Seventeen hundred.
I don't I don't see Gulliver traveled to that. You'd think Xinyi the boy. Did I suck at those. Did you guys ever have to do Shakespeare and Shakespeare and I never do that.
Oh that's so bad. I would have been bad at that. Oh is I bad. But I did take Shakespeare like in college, an acting class. I took a Shakespeare class and. Yeah.
And you had to play someone like a character, Shakespeare character that was opposite of, you know, my conflating some story. Yeah. That's not me. OK, I guess I'm conflating the story where you had to play someone else in your class. You do an impersonation of someone else in your acting class.
Oh, yeah, right.
You know, it was so accurate.
I was so good and so pinpoint. So specific. Oh, so we talk about comedy albums and he was like, do people even listen to comedy albums anymore? There are still comedy albums made because I saw some a list of like top comedy albums this year and was in twenty eighteen. But when you look at that list, I'm sure all of those people are amazing, but it's not like the top comedians are doing comedy albums.
Right. They're doing specials. That's right. The comedy album was the special exam for VHS and you couldn't read. Watch. Now we've moved to a Netflix special.
Yeah. Did you get any like historically who? I feel like Steve Martin had the biggest. Oh, I didn't look.
I can look right now like sold, you know, like what a real rock band of that era would have.
Soul Top 20 best selling comedy albums. This has Adam Sandler. Yeah, I know. That's a big one as number one.
Oh, wow. Over two million. Oh, wow. Number two, Jeff Foxworthy oh three, Jeff Foxworthy.
Well, you might be a redneck if. Yeah.
You might be a redneck if his three two is games rednecks play ok for is weird Al. Oh that makes sense. Bad hair day number five is another Adam Sandler. They're all going to laugh at you. I remember that one guy six is a Beavis and Butthead, the Beavis and Butthead experience. Oh wow. No. Steve Martin seven. Dane Cook Retaliation Cookie Monster eight. Dane Cook Harmful if swallowed nine.
The Jerky Boys all loved it. Really. Oh my God. That was my favorite. Oh yeah.
In high school. That one. You don't know the Jerky Boys. Oh my God. They were prank phone calls. They were so.
Oh do you know when I was young when Foxworthy hit the scene like maybe thirteen or something and I thought those redneck jokes were so funny and I had memorized a bunch of them at one point.
You did? Yeah. One of them was if your mom doesn't remove the Marlboro Red cigarette from her lip as she tells the state trooper to kiss her ass, you might just be a redneck.
Oh, wow. Oh, good. Impressive.
Ten and eleven are also weird. Al Twelve is Larry the cable guy, 13 and 14 hour. Larry, the cable guy. Fifteen, Jerry Clower.
So I went on a USO tour to Afghanistan in 07 and I think it was 07.
And we learned on this tour that the next guest was going to be Larry, the cable guy that he was coming through in the next week. And so they have you sign all this military equipment and you see the names of all these other people who have visited on USO tours, like certain helicopter, everyone signs or certain warhead.
And so every time I was asked to sign something, I wrote Gitter done DAX Shepard because I thought Larry the cable guy most certainly right, get her done whenever he signed something. I'm always jealous. I don't have a catchphrase.
So you got to think of something to say. Sure. And I just took his and I like to think that he was so annoyed when he got there and he's like, what the fuck am I going to write?
He wrote, Get her done or oh. Oh boy. Do you put the date.
I don't recall. I don't think so, because then I think what happens is he just also writes his own catch phrase. Is it his that's his catch phrase said or done. Right. So he'll probably just write that and then the next person who comes will be like. Oh, DAX Shepard just took Larry, the cable guy's phrase, I don't think they're thinking it. You think I still came out on bottom? OK, OK, OK. If he did notice it, it would be real funny.
I used his catchphrase.
Yeah. Maybe I'd be flattered. I hope he'd be flattered. OK, 16 Bill Angle 17. Weird Al. Wow. He's so many 18 various artists. The Blue Collar Comedy Tour.
That's Larry Foxworthy and then 19 and 20 are Jeff Foxworthy as well.
I cannot believe Steve Martin and Richard Pryor are not.
Yeah, but maybe because I think there was a sweet spot in comedy albums that maybe was after Steve Martin. And I thought, yeah, I was wrong.
I thought I thought the peak of all those was like mid 80s. Those come.
I mean, unless this list could be wrong. It's a billboard chart, though. Should be right. OK, the JPL guy is strange. Angel. Jack Parson. Yes.
Jack Parsons. DNA like on Earth. Also, his name is John Whiteside Parsons, but goes by Jack Parsons and. Yeah, and he does have a connection to L. Ron Hubbard and like it was intellect, dark magic and Sallisaw Crawley.
Yeah. Yeah. OG's yeah. The Okkult.
Well all those really early rocket scientists were all science fiction nerds because they were dreaming of rockets before anyone else were, which was totally science fiction.
Yeah. So much overlap.
Yeah, exactly. And then I was just, I just wrote down that we should probably make those chicken wings, you suggest, with the ruffles. Oh yeah. That sounds great. Yeah.
I'd like to try that. That sounds like a tasty treat.
I finish the the rest of the chicken salad at the track. Yes. Oh you did. Yeah. It's so good.
I mean you know how I ate it yesterday. How with my fingers. Oh it's dip my fingers in the metal bucket and a chicken salad. Oh yeah. You just those good one and use a fork.
I didn't have any utensils. Oh yeah. Well you did what you had to do. I misplaced the bread.
OK, long enough that I just got impatient that way. That makes I would have done the same.
Yeah. I need another batch of it. We always need another batch. We always need another batch.
Yeah. That's all. All right. Love you. Love you.