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What is up daddy going it is your single father, Alex Cooper. We call her daddy. Daddy. Well, well, well, if it isn't the mother fucking daddy gang, it is your founding father.

Good word for another motherfucking episode of Call her daddy.

I'm having a mental breakdown.

Hey, guys, what's up? I'm doing this. And when I tell you I may sound out of breath, I just sprinted down my basement stairs. What do you mean, Alex? I'm back at my parents fucking basement. Yeah, you heard that right. We're back where it all fuckin started. The single father era. Remember, guys, when I was like, hey, guys, I'm in my parents basement. And Laurie would come down and she'd be in the middle of doing my fuckin laundry or back bitches.

So I'm back at my parents basement. Honestly, I don't love it. I don't hate it. I'm just indifferent. I'm honestly blacked out right now. Let me explain why it's currently Tuesday night. Now, usually I am prepared and ready and I usually have this intro and this episode done before Tuesday night and Tuesdays. I edit the podcast. But no, no, no, no, no, no.

Folks, this week is a little bit different, you guys, because you see Alex is having a mental breakdown. You're all like, OK, Alex, chill for a second. So in the midst of my mental breakdown on top of all of this, I went and got my eyebrows done. I know it sounds weird to stick with me. It's a Tuesday. I'm feeling ugly as fuck. I even got my eyebrows down in so fucking long that it technically looks like I have the largest forehead in the game because I don't have eyebrows.

They're blonde right now, so I need to get that shit put back on my head so it does a nice little ratio between my eyeballs on my forehead. OK, no one gives a fuck I go to get my eyebrows done.

I my eyebrow woman shout out Liz. I've been going to her since I was in high school. She is the mother fucking shit. I walk in and she's like, oh my God. There's a daddy gang member also here getting her eyebrows done.

And I'm like, no fucking way. So I started talking to this girl, Dom shout out. She's eighteen, she's a dental assistant. She is from Pennsylvania and she loves a podcast. She's daddy going through and through. We love to see it. And so we start chatting. We're talking.

I'm like, thank you so much for listening and supporting. And then she has the audacity to look me directly in the eyes. And she's like, I am so excited for tomorrow's episode.

Now, in this moment, Daddy saying, I love you so much, Tom, shout out.

But I had a moment where I just reactionary went to backhand you because I'm like, don't fucking remind me that it is a fucking Tuesday.

And my intro, is it ready? My episode's not ready. And I was like, oh my God, that's so excited that you're so excited for Wednesday.

Thank you so much for listening. Like I love you, blah, blah. But I was like it just the funny thing is, is the episodes not done? And she was like, I'm like, no, I know it looks like I'm just chillin. You're getting my on the episodes not done. And let me explain to you why the episode on guys, I've been really struggling.

I am in this new era of trying to be health and wellness. I'm just taking people's feelings more into consideration other than just my own. You know, in therapy, it's not all about Alex, you know, it's about others, too. By others, I mean the men that I'm fucking.

And so one of the guys that I'm seeing, I am very aware that he listens to this podcast.

Hello. Hey, girl. Hey, boy.

And so I I'm trying to be like, hey, you know, I know I've told him that I'm dating other people, but I, I don't think that it feels great when he hears me saying that I'm doing other things with men.

So that's that's just what that is. So my entire issue with this intro was I wanted to tell you guys the truth. That's what I'm supposed to do. Right. But I was like, damn, this sounds fucked up. You're all like, Alex, what's happening? OK, I've been putting off this intro because what it started as it was going to be that on Wednesday when I released this episode, I'm going into New York, I'm staying in a hotel room because I obviously don't have an apartment in New York anymore.

And then on Thursday morning, I'm getting on a plane and I'm going to see a man. OK, now listen to all everyone.

Alex, are you covid? Whatever. Listen, I fucking get it, trust me, but a girl's got to get fucking content. I've got my hazmat suit. I've got my fucking face shield, my extra fat ass fucking gloves and all of the hand sanitizer in the world stocked in my fucking pocket. And also just shout out to anyone that's going to come for me. If it was illegal to get on a plane, I'd be in fucking jail.

OK, I'm taking all the precautions I'm going to get.

Dick So that was going to be my intro. Whoo! Yes, she's going. And then something else happened, and that was where I was struggling to be, like, I could just tell them that, but in true daddy giving Alex Cooper fashion, this is, of course, my life.

And I want to tell you guys. When I go to New York and I stay in the hotel room, I'm going on a date, not with the man I'm going to see the night before I leave for my flight, I'm going into New York and I'm meeting this guy for a date. We love that, we love that everyone's like, OK, Alex, we condone I know, I just feel bad. I'm sorry. Shout out the guy that's listening, you and your family.

You guys are amazing, great people. Honestly, this is all a lie. It's just for the show. Donnegan unilateral. So that's where I'm at.

So basically, there's this guy that I connected with on Instagram and he goes back and forth between L.A. and New York. And he messaged me and he was like, I'm going to be in New York like, let me get a drink with you, blah, blah, blah, blah.

So I've always been interested in this guy. I've never fully met him. We've only connected on the Internet. But I can just tell, like, fuck, there could be something there.

So by my huge mistake and I mean huge mistake, I told the one person that I shouldn't have told Krolick, the guy I know my mother, there's intro's taking a twist.

Here we go. I told my mom about the guy that wanted to go on a date with me, and she was like, Alexandra, you're going on the date.

Now, if you guys remember back in the days, my mother is yes, she's a psychologist. And yes, she's great and gives great advice. But there's also something that she is and she's a fucking FBI agent to the mother fucking core.

Who Laurie Cooper really is, is when Alex Cooper comes to her mother and she says, Mom, I may go on a date with this guy before I can even blink. Laurie Cooper has the whole rap sheet. She knows the man's height. She knows his way. She knows his family history, his lineage, his net worth. Every single fucking thing that you need to know about someone you about to go on a date with. My mother has it ready to go.

So I tell about the guy. I'm like, should I go on the date? Is it fucked up? No, it's not fucked up to double date like one guy and another guy and like, who gives a fuck, right? I'm single, whatever.

And my mom is like, you're going on the date. And I'm like, oh, why?

Laurie Cooper does some hardcore research. She loves the guy's background. She loves specifically the family background.

That night. I'm like, I don't know, I'm still deciding. My mom says, come watch a movie with me. We sit down, we press play on the movie. And one minute and I realize we are watching a movie about this man's family. OK, I can't make this shit up, guys. And I'm like, Mom, Laurie Cooper's like, Alex, come on.

Like you should you should get to know, like, look, it's so cool. Like his his family little has a movie about them.

In that moment I just flash forward and I'm like picturing myself on this date and I'm like, oh my God. Yeah. I'm like your aunt is so pretty.

And he's going to be like, how do you know my my aunt looks like it's like those Meems where people like you've stalked them so hardcore, but then you're on the first date and you're like, oh I mean we you know, I'm in my aunt.

You're on. What are you talking about? Shut the fuck up. Can I get a drink? Like, I'm going to know everything about this guy before I go on the date. He's handsome, he's intelligent, he's educated.

He comes from a great fucking family. Why not? Right.

So that's why I decided. And so I guess I did it. I guess I did it. I apologize to both men and men in advance and well, the other the one that I'm going the first day with won't know I did well.

He may know about the podcast, so I apologize in advance to the guy that I'm coming to see on a plane. I apologize that first I'm doing a quick pit stop to have a drink with this guy. But the thing that you can hopefully lean on is maybe this will make me like you more. Maybe the state will be fucking awful. I'm feeling it's not going to be awful. You know what? You can just tell you're going to vibe with someone.

So I don't know. So, I mean, I feel like my mom always has a pretty good inclination of what men I'm going to get along with and vibe with.

She loved door number three. She loved the man from L.A. And now here we are, this man. She's like, you got to go.

Got him Big Al. So that's what I'm doing, guys. So when I released this episode, you going to be listening? I'll be getting ready for my day in New York and I'll be going on that date. And then the next morning I'll be getting on a plane and going to see a man and all is well in love and war.

No, that's not welcome. Going to fucking call her daddy today, folks.

I think this was making me feel as though I'm realizing that the floodgates are soon going to be opening.

Now, don't get me wrong, I realize that the vaccine isn't out yet. But when this fucking thing comes out, I can't believe I'm saying it. But like, life is going to go back to normal soon at some point, at least after the new year march, whenever it's going to go back to normal. And I feel like it's so crazy to sit here and remember back when I was starting the first episode of How to Survive Quarantine almost a year ago, now that's fucking wild.

We had no idea how long we were going to be in this. Now, a year, almost later, it's about to be back to normal. The world is going to go back to normal, hopefully soon. And when that happens, every single person in my dreams that is saying their sex life is fucking suffering from Corona. Oh, my God, I haven't gotten fucked in so long. Oh, my God, I'm so over FaceTime sex.

Oh, my God. I'm so over dating apps. Cross our fingers, but it's going to go back to fucking normal.

And so Daddy getting in the spirit of mentally preparing ourselves to get fucking ready to get back into the fucking dating game in person dating, I thought who better to have on who better to give us some fucking dick writing finger up the asshole mouth on your soul fucking tips other than the one the only Emily Morse commercial noom. Let's take a minute. Everybody listening to this podcast, you have a bad habit, you drink too much coffee, you smoke cigarettes, you drool, you drool, you smoke, you bite your nails, whatever, you have a bad habit with Noom.

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Daddy gang. I am here with the one and only Dr. Emily Morse. Thank you for coming.

So excited we're back. I know we've got a lot to cover.

So everyone, last episode with Emily, so many people were reaching out and I was just telling Emily before we started recording, it made me so happy that so many women wrote in when we talked about sexual trauma and for sex fantasies, there were a lot of women that had so much guilt, so much shame.

And Emily, you did an amazing job outlining, like, why you should not feel shame and why you should not feel bad about those things, like having those thoughts and feelings. So thank you so much. Let's just get right back into it. Question. This actually picks kind of up back from where we were last episode together. And so we have a girl that is asking, so I have sexual trauma and I have a boyfriend. How do you suggest going about telling a new partner that you are getting involved with, that you do have sexual trauma and that it does affect you in a specific way?

Because I can totally get it. If it's a one night stand, my three things like I'm not going to walk and be like, hey, by the way. And it's like, OK, they don't need to know that shit. But as you get more into a relationship, how do you think is the best way to go about it?

Well, first, the most important thing is to make sure that you're with a trusted partner, that this is actually someone that you've been together a month and you think it's just casual, because when you're going to reveal your trauma to somebody, you want to make sure they can hold the space, they can handle it, that you already trust them.

So once you've covered all of that. I think it's important to also have done your work, so have you been to therapy? Have you figured out how the trauma is impacting you as a sexual being and maybe you haven't yet, but you still want to bring it up like let's say there was a sexual assault? What I would recommend is just saying, listen, it's timing, tone and turf. If I talk about the last a little bit outside the bedroom.

So timing is you want to make sure it's a good time when you're not, like drunk, you're chilling.

Turf is outside the bedroom for all these kind of conversations. It's not just right before you have sex. Definitely not right after. And then your tone is casual and even just earnest and just saying, listen, babe, I want, you know, baby, sweetie, whatever. This is really hard for me to say. And I want you to know that I've experienced some sexual trauma. And this is you could say this is what happened. I was assaulted.

I was I was raped. I had molestation.

And as a result of that, you need to know that because and then you get to fill in the blank, because when there's really rough sex, it triggers me and then I shut down or I'm actually not able to have sex without the lights on because I have fear, like so to fill in, because you have to remember that our partners don't know what to do with it. So just to say I got off my chest, I was assaulted, let's go bang.

It's like it just like that makes me think too. Like so bringing it all the way back to just like if you have had something happen to you that maybe wasn't even sexually trauma and you go to your partner sometimes, especially with a male partner, sometimes I feel like women are so upset by the man's reaction. And I realize like this actually happened to me in a situation. I was telling the guy that I'm seeing something and his reaction, I was like, that's it.

But it was because men, I feel like have a really hard time if they can't directly control it or do something about it. Men are like, well, I'm useless. What do you want me to say to this?

Right. Right. Yes. And the great way to. Exactly and the great way to to start that conversation is to let them know I'm going to tell you something and I really just need you to listen. Yes.

Because what if you are. Look, so that's such a great point is if you are looking to them to to nurture you and to take care of you and to say the perfect thing, not going to happen at all.

So why are you telling them? First off, if you're telling them because you want sympathy, if you're telling them, because you want them to know why you were being an asshole the night before or whatever it is, just make sure you're going for the right reasons.

And if you're telling me and hopefully you're going because you've worked it through in therapy, because I want to repeat this again, because it's important is that sexual trauma doesn't just go away.

It's not like I used to think that time heals all wounds. It does not go deeper in their insidious. And then you're 40 and then you still are experienced trauma. So go see a therapist that deals with sexual trauma. Yeah. And then just listen, tell them what you need. It's not a one time conversation. You can keep updating on it.

So I think that's beautiful. And I also think I remember reading like somewhat reading the book, like men are from Mars, women are from Venus. And you saying, Emily, I think that's huge. Daddy listening. If you're always super upset with how your partner is responding, you telling the man first, like, I just need you to listen and be there, that gives him an IQ, like, OK, so she doesn't need me to solve anything, because if you're going out a man and you're like, bitching about your problems, a lot of times men are just like, I don't know what I'm supposed to do here.

And that I feel like why sometimes we're just like really let down by their responses. Yes.

And the good thing about this, what I love is, is that maybe we should do it all the time. Like if you're bitching about your best friend or work or my boss, I don't need you to tell me to go to human resources or I don't need you to tell me to quit my job. I'm actually going to tell you a story right now, and I need you to listen or I need you to laugh. What do you need?

Why are you telling if you're constantly disappointed by your partner, they probably don't know what you need. It's so true. And exercise. Exactly. Everyone listening. So, men, if you hear us right now, we're literally saying you guys have to understand. A lot of times women just want to bitch and we just want to talk. We can talk about things over and over and over again. My favorite thing to do, I'm like, oh, we talked about it.

OK, let's talk about it one more time. Twenty more times next week, I want to talk about, again, women. That's how women are. So men half the time. You have to understand that when your girlfriend is bitching, all she wants you to do is just listen. And then on the other aspect, it's like girls listening. You have to understand men have a very hard time when they can't provide a direct solution, something tangible.

They're like, I don't know what I'm supposed to do with this information. And so you have to maybe, like, give him the precursor to be like, hey, I just want you to be there and listen with me. Sorry, I'm bitching. I just need someone to sit and listen.

And it's a skill set, too, so you're not going to find it. I don't need to be ageist here, but a lot of men in their 20s and women in their twenties, they might not have done their work yet, even 30s, unless they had they went through something and they had to go to therapy. We don't we don't know these things. But you could learn together. You can say, OK, let's figure out what we actually need.

It's a great practice because then you'll be able to use that for the rest of that is so brilliant, because it's and I'm not saying everyone has to be in therapy, but if you are listening to this, I agree with you kind of do. And everyone's like, why listen to call her daddy or Emily like to get my therapy, but say if you're not in therapy and you're thinking about going to therapy, I can't. Say it enough, how much has already changed my life, it's making me understand, like how much it significantly can affect a relationship in the most positive aspects.

So, like, if you are in a relationship and you want to go to couples therapy or just go to therapy by yourself, I would encourage you guys to do so because it really is life changing, is life changing.

You're just learning skills. Listen, we all had childhoods that are going to impact us throughout our life.

You might even think it was the perfect childhood, but there's no such thing. We all have stuff. It could just be one thing. The time you weren't picked for the team in third grade and now you've constantly feel insecure about things. And as a result of that, that's showing up when you're twenty five. I mean, it doesn't end. And so just to go unpack that stuff, it doesn't mean you're insane. No one's going to lock you away.

You're not going to get a weird diagnosis. It's actually going to help you with your entire life, with your job. It'll work with your sex life.

And when you're saying that, Emily, it made me also think like when you are in therapy, you start to learn, like you're saying the the issues within yourself. So then when you're in a relationship and they're doing something to you, it's not always putting blame on the other person because you're like, well, I know this is what I struggle with and so how can I articulate it to my partner? Like, Hey, these are the things that I know I'm bad or I'm not I'm not comfortable with and then share it.

Do you want to give an example maybe of what you've learned in therapy and how you're applying that in your relationship?

Oh, my God, that's a good one. OK, so I have this. Like, I am very bad at sharing when I am upset with someone, and so I usually just shut down and I have this, I don't know why, but I am getting there in therapy. But like, I constantly think that no one actually really cares about other people's shit. I don't think that other people really care at times like especially with the men I've dated.

But that's just by choice because I've dated assholes. So a lot of times every time I've gone to a past lover to be like, hey, this is what I'm struggling with, they give me an answer that is so inadequate to what I'm looking for that I started to just internalize everything and never share it. So in therapy, I've been unpacking that. And with the guy that I'm currently seeing, instead of shutting off, I let him know I do that.

So every time I'm being quiet or something's wrong with me, he'll be like, let's just talk about it. Like, obviously something's wrong, Alex, and he'll put me on the spot. And it has literally changed my life because now I'm being so much more open and I'm allowing someone to be there for me when I'm feeling like shit. So had I not articulated to him like, hey, this is what I do usually when I'm stressed or I'm struggling or like, I just don't think you're going to care.

I kind of need a little bit of push to show, like, you really do care. And now he's been doing that all the time and it's like really been life changing.

That is that's a great example. Perfect example. Perfect example that they let your part. I believe that in relationships, your partner wants to please you. They want to be a good lover. He wants to be a good boyfriend.

But but from your conditioning, for whatever reason, you had to take it out. The guys you dated were assholes. They didn't have the skill set. And this is what we're saying is that most people don't have the skill set. You wouldn't have known a year ago maybe how to express that.

So so they're the therapy helps you figure out your get your needs met. Everyone get in therapy. Yes, Emily. Yes. We have so many questions. We have so many things.

OK, being the queen over there that you are. Yes, babe.

I think it's super interesting to have ask another woman. There are so many girls that are very insecure about getting on top of a guy. And having sex and I'm so sick of it because I know the drinking is too, when you ask someone like, Wow, like how do I get on top and like, ride a guy and be confident and then everyone's like, you just got to have that self-confidence and like, body love. And it's like, no, no, no.

We want actual details of like how like, ah, do you have any tricks? Like when you think of yourself in the bedroom, are there any like go to things that you do?

Because I think truly if you can, one is obviously be confident. But two, if you have a couple tricks, like when you're riding guy on top, you can really make him fall in love and you watch his face and he just like goes into a different dimension when he sees you up there, like owning it.

So the thing about on top is it's you want to do something that feels good to you. So since every woman orgasms differently and you might not even know, let's talk about this, too. We already covered that most women are not going to come that way. But the reason why women tend to be so popular is because women who do orgasm during penetrative sex are more likely to orgasm on top because we're in control of the movement, the depth, the speed, we kind of we're in control, which is awesome.

But then we were like, great, I'm in control now. What the fuck do I do? Right. So what you do is you play around with different positions. And what I recommend is. Personally, I don't think that the going up and down is a thing that's hot for the guy, of course, I don't know that that feels as great to many women. However, if you're going up and down like the pogo stick thing, you could make sure that you really want to.

It's all about having enough clitoral stimulation so you could still use your fingers and be rubbing you in every position. Another thing to do is to lean forward and lay completely flat.

I want to give you some of a position called the CAT, the coital alignment technique. Yes. So what you're doing is you're able to when you're lying flat on him and maybe you're like making out you're able to really rub your pelvic floor on him. It's really intimate. It be really hot because you can, like, make out, but you're still on top moving back and forth. So that's one you want to make sure that you are paying attention to what actually feels good to you.

So for some women who actually need to keep their legs closer together as well, there's some women. Do you forget those? Yeah. So so this way, if you're on flat, your legs can still be squeezing tighter and then you're moving back and forth.

So I love that one too, because and again, that is a more intimate position. But even if it's not your boyfriend and you're doing that, I think a lot of times if you lower yourself, basically we're saying like onto his chest and then you can also still put your hand, like under there and be rubbing your clear. You can be like making out with him and then also start like breathing into his ear and talking dirty to him. And then you can be like kissing down his neck, etc.

And then also you can just kind of put your head next to his almost and just be basically going to be staring at him. No, no. You don't need to be like. I can't. No, no. No one wants that the entire time. I love that one, too. Breathe. OK, so that's one. And then also when you're on top, you can play. So I think that we just we know the basics, right.

Your knees are back, but you could also do it. So your your legs are are full. Look around his his head. You can kind of like. Oh yeah. Like you're lying this way we don't know about.

Yeah. And he could even be pulling you back and forth that way. So you. Oh my God. I want to try this. Yeah. I've never done this. Yeah.

So you put your legs basically around his neck and then if obviously he could almost be pulling you by your hips like pulling you into and you're almost kind of both laying like flat up.

Exactly. That is so high. The other thing is now, so you're in this position where your legs are. He could also sit up and then you could be sitting. This is really hot. Have you ever done this one? When you're in bed, you're on the bed. So he's sitting up, you're sitting up and your legs are wrapped around each other. That is hot. That is really hot to begin. You could also, I think that women have to bounce up and down that one.

But you're you can go back and forth with that one as well. I think one of the hottest ones that I what I enjoy and like how I usually have an amazing orgasm this way and I can have it like internally and externally is when I am on top. But if I'm leaning back because the penis is like hitting my G spot and then when you're leaning back and then you can use one of your hands to rest behind you on to the mattress, and then you can be stimulating your own clit and you're kind of doing the grinding motion.

But it's almost like a back up motion on the back is enough and then you can kind of hit it, feel it. Hitting your pelvic wall and and you're getting leaning back is another one. But for some women, that doesn't feel good. But that's true. You want to lean back. You don't want to bend their penis so they don't break it unless you're really straight. That's great leaning back. And it's like hitting your it's hitting the wall.

You could also start to spin around. That's another one. Have you done the spin around reverse cowgirl? Right. But it is kind of funny if you try to keep the dick and you take it.

Oh, yeah, I do that. I Emily's like that special. That's my specialty a lot about it. And then I had a friend say to me once you were to reverse cowgirl Robin, I fucking forgot says with the guy that night. And I was like, oh dude, I like you just like who I am. Let me get on spin. Let me spin.

So you spin around. You could also be doing cowgirl and you could lay back. So then you're also getting the you know, if you lay back and obviously listen and it sucks, sometimes it doesn't work as well if the guy's penis is a little bit smaller. But if you if he does have a decently good sized penis and then you are doing reverse cowgirl, then you butt out again, you lay back basically onto his chest. That can be hot because then you can literally just have them inside you.

You're kind of grinding around on his dick and you can be getting yourself off with your on with your hand in your closet. Or you can also get his hand and you have his uses, his toy and show him use a cock, ring you something like that you could actually wear during sex. That's awesome. But for a lot of women, if you go and you're like, oh, I'm going to rub my clit, I'm going to move around, I'm going to use his body like a fucking joystick, like I'm going to ride his penis, not the way that looks good to him.

But I like to use him as a research experiment to figure out he wouldn't listen.

If a man authentically sees you have an orgasm. Oh, my God. Because you were getting up and you're losing that. When we say confidence, this is what we mean by we mean you're confident because you know that you were going to get off your you know, your body because you've spent time exploring and masturbating. And then you just get in there, know that you can move your mobile every woman in the next, whenever you're having sex, you're getting on top.

And I don't care if you're parents, try it, try it.

And remember, you could leave a shirt on. You can work. We were so concerned about their bodies like this. The other thing I want to say about it is that. You know, you could wear like if you feel comfortable with, like an off the shoulder shirt, let's say you could wear it off, you could wear a T-shirt, you could get some real injury, find something that makes you feel sexy.

The lightning. Can I quickly just say yes, men, if you want to get fucked, don't be like, hey, do you want to come over, Rebecca? And it's like the lights are out of 10 and you can see every crevice of each other's bodies, like maybe it's in the fucking lights. Dude's like candles. I don't have candles. Like bring make it. It will be advantageous for you because girls will get ten times fucking nastier if it's just like a little bit less of an intrusive moment where they're like, OK, you can literally see all of my lips and everything happening, which is hot, but for the first time, hooking up.

Maybe a girl is not as confident to like, ease into it with lighting definitely helps and don't feel pressure that you have to do any of these things.

But but I'm telling you, don't don't avoid women on top of you've never tried it or any of the things or the light or just listen to it. Just remember this. They don't know what to do either.

Like, I think we give men so much power, so figure out what's good for you and bring that to the table.

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You're welcome guys who who can't get hard during sex like let's say even young man. Do we talk about this. No, let's go into it. Penises are malfunctioning at an alarming rate right now.

Well that's not funny. But it's funny though, because we have so many fucking issues as women like go fuck yourself, men like that's the one thing they have to deal. But also it is kind of fucked. I always kind of feel bad for guys because there's two things. One, we can get a boob job, we can get all these things, we can wear makeup. Guys, your dick is your dick and like, that's it. And then also, it's not like when you come back and you're fucked up at a bar and like you can basically always said you can fake it.

We don't we don't want anyone to fake it, but you can fake orgasms affected. You can put on your vagina.

He can't fake that is fucking dick. It's hard if it's little and it's flaccid, it's flaccid and it's a little macaroni and you're like, nothing's happening. So like, what can we to be devastating. I honestly. I'm sorry. I'm laughing because again, around the world I love you so much and it's it's fucked up.

It's fucked up. But let's help them with their I mean, you have a lot of men. I mean, you've had so many I've had girls really write in and be like I literally went out with this guy and we got so fucked up on our first date, but it was fun, whatever. And he couldn't get hard and then he didn't even text me the next day. And I always tell those girls, like, if you didn't do anything wrong and if anything, that is the one time that I would say text him after, because he probably thinks he is so embarrassed with himself that he doesn't even know if you would want to see him again.

When really girls, we don't really fucking we don't care.

I sit anyway. You are tired. I don't have an orgasm. Only tweet over this last time, but I can't say that's enough. Only 20 percent of women are going to have an orgasm with penis during intercourse. Twenty percent. Right. You didn't really care. They didn't get hard. Like you could let them know that you're like, I'm cool, dude.

If you can't get hard, you have a mouth low down and even out. I don't probably enjoy that.

Even fucking more women are more likely to orgasm with a mouth, with fingers. We talk about this.

So not a penis, not a penis. We don't talk. So we don't even put that much weight on your penis. As you do know, they freak out. And then what happens is as, oh, this is this vicious cycle. So they feel bad. But women, what do we do? I wasn't hot enough. I didn't do enough. I was giving a bad blowjob. I can't believe it's. Malfunctioned at this rate. What happened?

It has nothing to do with you, most of the things we worry about are not really the cause of it. It has nothing to do with you. So so for the penis thing, we are seeing men a lot. So I used to when I started this, it was really only men over 40 who had erectile dysfunction. As your testosterone starts to drop over the age of 40, it just does not every man's skin experiences. But now I'm hearing like 18 year olds.

Twenty five year olds all the time, like every night they call into my show. And it's like, what, Wyatt?

Well, I think a lot of it has to do with anxiety. Yeah, that there's more anxiety now that people are because a lot of this the best news is for men and for women who are not orgasmic or they can't get heart. We can work through this stuff. It has to do with anxiety and worry.

But it could also be because of the foods we're eating.

We're seeing that testosterone in generations like the last 20, 30 years. This is a whole nother this has not even been out that much. But again, there's the hormones in our food are so messed up that men are being born with less testosterone.

Wow. I mean, this isn't even like a so I kept thinking it's it's anxiety. It's medication. It's it's people are being active and exercising. Because the first thing I have to say with before I freak you out about all the foods and hormones is that it's a blood flow problem. If you are not exercising and eating healthy, your penis will knock it hard. If your blood is not, it will not be able to maintain erection. So make sure that you cover all of those things.

You eat healthy, you exercise, go to your doctor, get your testosterone checked. Right.

So it also is so fascinating because I remember when I started to kind of like hook up with an X again, and this is like no shame to him because I again, I can't even imagine how uncomfortable he felt. But I'd started the show and I had known him prior to the show. And I can imagine, like. Hooking up with someone that has a sex podcast, especially mine, that I sometimes happen to like, really just talk about my life on this and like really talk about my experiences.

We were we hadn't seen each other, I get down for the weekend, we're going to have sex for the first time. He can't get heart. And I felt so bad because he had been hyping it up so much and sexting me and talking to me about how much he wanted to fuck me, and then I get there. And this is a very like, manly man, and he can not get hard, and after I started my show, when I would be hooking up with this person multiple times as happened, and he had made comments to me like on different days, but not right after.

But he would have been like, well, like, are you going to tell it like are you going to talk about that on your podcast that like that happened? And like, I could just tell I felt so bad that he was so insecure about it. And I was like, no, I'm not going to talk about it.

I'm talking about it right now, layers. But I do think that men and their penis, as much as I've always said, like there are two different brains when it's coming down to it, it's one brain. And so if you aren't able to be there in your head, guys, then why the fuck would your other head be able to work and function if you were worrying if your blood is rushing to your head because you're obsessing and you're worried, just think about it.

Leaving your penis leverage and going up to your head cause you're obsessing. So going back to your guy with the penis, it's like with the penis they'll penises without the erection.

It could also be alcohol, foods, all the if he was really wasted. We all like whiskey, too. Yes. Yes. But like, it's there's so many other factors that go and it's really there's like ten different factors.

Yeah. And I think that any man listening to this, this can be kind of an amazing thing for you to hold on to that. Like when you have whiskey, Dick, and you can't get hard, you are overthinking it. And you think that the girl like thinks you're pathetic and whatever and oh my God, he didn't even get hard. And whatever we really like don't care, because at the end of the day, women, if we had to get hard and you had to like, actually see us be turned on before you fuck us, I don't know how often we would be having a rough sex.

You know, we would never have that ever. Right. So we are fortunate that we can kind of mask it. But men just know that, like, we're really under such and like girls aren't being like he couldn't get hard. Like, when we talk about it the way it's like, oh, because he was fucked up and he couldn't get hard. But just know that when we're having our little powwows with our girlfriends, we're not like making fun of you.

I don't give a fuck. I'm like, yeah, he hammered. Who cares. Whatever. It's fine now if it's every day, obviously he never has. You never seen an erection like I did a premature ejaculation for two years. We will go in my early 30s.

I was like, oh I how about you why I'm here.

You're like, that's why I'm here to talk about something. I was like, how did I? Because I know what to do. I don't know what to say. We like how. What do you like a minute. No, but I was really busy.

I was making you feel like you're like I didn't really get out of my way.

I just didn't know how to deal with it. And I was like part of a book.

And I thought he should do you part of the book about how to do it. He did. Did he ever verbally because he was stoner.

But I don't you know, like I bought him a book. I think he's like crying that. But but every time he came, like, super fast, would he say something like, I'm so sorry?

Or what's also been a challenge from an all of his relationships. And then I came up with his other exes and they all said the same thing to me is you. Oh, God is a whole other thing. OK, maybe we should even get to know. I mean, there's so much we've got some serious this time.

I know. Well, it's good. I mean. Well, these are real life issues.

Yeah. Really. Like, I just want people to give you permission to communicate openly and freely with your partner about what's going on.

Angel, let's do anal. OK, so we're going to start like like there we talked about it a little bit last time where we were just saying, like, first explore anal play. You're not going to be like I have never I haven't even had a guy lick my ass. I haven't had a finger in there, but like, let's do anal and, like, shove a dick in my ass, daddy, you know, ease the fuck into it.

Just like if you're, like, going to hook up with someone. A lot of times you start with getting fingered and then you go to eating out and then there's a blowjob and it's like, remember when we were back in like seventh grade and was like, what base did you guys go to? Like, I went to second base or third base. That's kind of like with the asshole, OK, we're starting up first base with the asshole before we go for a grand slam home run.

Yeah.

Don't go from zero to anal. Do not want to go. Right. This penis is just going right inside. You guys not know when you're going to pass out like me and you have to pass.

Listen, gallons of lube like so much sleep. So I love that we're starting this way. First step to having anal and to understand let's call anal play anal play because anal play like it doesn't mean like it has to be fucking penis in your ass without even any preparation. So the first thing is so the sphincter muscles right outside of the anus has so many nerve endings. Oh. So make sure that your first here's the first thing. Your hands are clean, your nails are trimmed before you go in anywhere.

And remember, everyone is anuses. So there's the same rules apply. If you're going into a man or a woman, hands are clean. All those things you have to use lube. The anus is not self lubricating.

Can we just pause for a minute there, please? Everybody, did you hear that? Take a look. And this is where my journey began when the man didn't understand. Like, listen, my vagina can self lubricate my asshole. Not so much, buddy. So everybody listening, whether you're putting a finger in there, you need to you need to use lots of lube.

Shooter like you shoot lubes of your ass we want. Well, when you come to the office, you're coming to my. Oh my God, you've lub shooters.

Way to see my office. I have a six foot closet the size of this room.

I believe men that come in like have sex with you. Oh no, my office is different. I have a home.

I send money to all my men sex chamber. We text, there's like a syringe that you put up your shit up your ass to give out. Honey, I got stuff for you.

I feel like a lot of girls are terrified to go near a guy's ass one because half the time you're like, is he even going to be OK with this? Which you can kind of. What I usually do is like if I'm giving a blowjob and it's like one of the first times I'm like hanging out with a guy. Well, I guess I wouldn't eat his ass on the first time, hang out with them. But when you get a little bit more comfortable, maybe when you're giving a blowjob or something or even during sex, obviously you lubricate your finger.

If you don't have lube, literally, like put a bunch of spit on your mouth wherever you lay on your hand.

I do that and then you go down and slowly I feel like as you get past it a little bit like a guy will look back up a little bit if, you know, like, OK, he's not into it right now, but a lot of times guys won't fully pull away. But then don't be like, OK, great, now I'm going for the kill and shove your fingers up there.

Just rub on the outside of it and start with the perineum to of the tape, which is, you know. Yeah. Between the date and we so that area you can even start there.

You can start to rub the outside of their adulterate anus. But then if you apply pressure to that area of high pressure to that area.

Right. You're indirectly stimulating the prostate and the prostate is like the male gispert, it's a peace bot. And so you could even just say, like I would have rubbers, then I would apply pressure there when they're back to come or when you're giving a blowjob. OK, let's see how they react to that. And then you could move your finger up to to that whole area, applying pressure there. You're indirectly stimulating the prostate. So then you go up and then so then let's say they're cool with that.

Emily, let me go down first, because I think a lot of people get confused. When you're saying apply pressure, are you saying on the ASL or are you saying I'm saying OK, so and what kind of motion do you do?

Just like a pressing pressure, like pressure, like pressing up pressure, consistent, or do you go up and down a little bit?

You just kind of rub it and you you apply pressure like this, like, like pulling up, pulse setting up, but you're not you're not going you're keeping an eye on it and then you're applying some pressure back and forth and back and forth and you're just seeing how they like it. Maybe you're going in circles, OK, maybe you're paying a little bit harder pressure. But at first, with every sex move, no matter what it is, whether you're with a vulva or penis, you start slow.

So you don't because also and that's what we've always said to men, it's like you shouldn't feel weird about this, because if anything, you should enjoy this more than women because we don't have a prostate. So like you should be like, please, for the love of God, if you are a man and you can accept, like, not only am I going to have an orgasm because I'm coming out of my dick, I'm also feeling amazing because something's being stimulating my asshole.

So, girls, if you're doing if you're giving him head or you're fucking put your hand down there, have it super lubricated and literally just applying pressure and attention. Yeah.

To his face. How does he like it. So then or she we're talking about everybody here. So then you so let's go back to the muscle. So you're outside of it, the sphincter muscles, you're feeling it. Then you could take a finger, you could take your your point, your finger, make sure your nails are again. Now we trembling. Whatever you do to point a finger, that's a really a popular one to do.

Some people do their middle finger, but I think it's great to start with your point finger and then you just start to move it inside slowly, see how they are reacting to it, and then you can start to move your finger. Right. That's where you should or could be a pinky. That's where you start.

OK, this is we need so much help here because the amount of people like I need step by step. So when when we're going to put the finger in, I guess we can talk more about like what what the first the girl is going to do to the male, because I think a lot of girls are like a little bit to how the fuck what do I do want to get in there? Oh, what am I doing when I get in there?

OK, so when you get in there, you're sticking your finger inside and then you are now you don't want to go all the way deep in. No. You want to just kind of put a finger in.

And again, everyone's different. Everyone wants something different. But you're not like we know one guy's finger. You, right.

And it's the jackhammer. I'll take your finger. Yeah. So you put the figure in and then you just start to you could leave it there for a minute. You could start to you could start to just move it around inside. Would you swirl swirled around. Now let me tell you where it feels great to the prostate.

OK is here. Find the prostate in the same way that you kind of find the G spot or the G area as I call it.

You're your finger goes inside and it's tau a come hither motion towards the guy's belly button and that's where you're going to find the prostate. But it's about an inch and a half, two inches inside. OK, you might not want to go all that for the first time because you're just putting your finger in. You're not giving milking the prostate.

You're not going in for the kill. It's fine to get out now. First time just finding your spot the first time, right.

Not going to happen. It also helps for them already to be turned on, to have an erection. All those things you go inside, we'll talk about the procedure. You go in and you can put a finger inside. You could start to move it slowly with lube in and out if they like that. But it can be very painful. So once you get inside, it can be because you never had anything in your ass. Right. So what is inside?

You could just leave it there. So I wouldn't even recommend that you're moving.

You could maybe that is a first step first. But first we said apply pressure on the team and like, you can lick the asshole. You can, like, rub around it. And then once you're past that stage and he's basically giving you the go ahead like I do kind of like this like anal play, then you go in with the finger and maybe you just put it in there almost like a butt plug. But it's just your finger. It's small.

We're just literally keeping it there and applying pressure while you're giving him head or while you're having sex. Then the next step is we could maybe start to do a little come hither motion. But I agree with you. I don't know if you putting a finger in and bringing it in and out. If this is like the beginning stages, it's too much, too much. But that's not even what you want to do with anal play, right? That's what I think the problem is with anal sex, too, is especially when it's on a woman or anyone, you just think you have to go in and out, right?

You do. But you just you really. That's not really what.

Yeah, it's almost like put it in there and let it marinate in there and and just feeling that pressure in itself. Like that's why we like butt plugs because like when I have a butt plug in and I have a dick and a dick, when I have a dick, whatever dick in me and my clit is being stimulated, you get that full feeling when you're having an orgasm. OK, so that's actually really helpful. So it is kind of the come hither motion to find the prostate.

So you go in and then you go inside with the come hither motion. Yeah, you'll be able to feel a little raised area. It kind of feels like a peach pit. Got it. Much like the. And then what you feel that area towards the belly button, then you start to apply pressure to it and you just keep kind of stroke it with your finger. So you're applying pressure. There's a little bit of stroking and there's and there's paying attention to your partner and how they're feeling.

And you go slow. And once you're doing applying that pressure, they might have an incredible fucking orgasm that way. And a sex act does not make you gay. People think if you get something, you're a. a big some guy. It just means that you're really fucking smart because you're exploring your body and you know what makes you come.

And if it makes you come and you enjoy it, feel personally like what is your favorite way to begin that with a man? Are you usually, like giving him a blowjob or you like happy doing it during sex? Like, what's your favorite way?

My way to do anal to anally play with the guy is usually when I'm giving a blowjob the first time, I will do exactly what I'm saying. I'll make sure that I have a lot of lube and then I'll start to like move my finger on there and start to play pressure.

And you can tell it's funny because either they're going to move forward, they're going to be like, I want more than that or they're going to pull away.

Right. So once they're like kind of leaning in, then I start to kind of use my she used my first finger. I point a finger and I'll just start to put it in. And then I just see if they if they like it, I'm like, OK, know, take it and I'll leave my finger. And now also I don't leave it in the whole time, so I'm giving a blowjob and then sometimes it's when they're about to come or when they're getting really turned on.

That's a really good time to put it inside. OK, but I like to kind of dip in there, see how they like it, that I take it out because it can, and then I'll put it back in again, because sometimes it can be kind of painful again. Right. Just in there. Talk about this dilators earlier for the vagina. The anus has to open up as well. Think about there's like these tight nerve endings. Oh, there's the other most important thing about anal.

You have to breathe. Like if you were like Emily.

Thirty seconds to go that we got to go. It'd be like lube. Breathe, go slow.

That's it. Like if you're like if I took anything from this episode.

Because another thing is we are Dervis, what do we do, like you passing out? I just want to make clear changes like Bosomed in the Klensch.

It's going to fucking hurt a little hurts.

But here's the beautiful thing. When you're with a partner that you trust and you go slow and you use lube and you breathe it, you feel amazing.

So many nerve endings. Yeah. Yeah. I mean, lately guys are down saying, I think it's so much hotter when guys are down because that's what I was saying.

The guy that I'm seeing right now is like I'm down for everything. Like you can put something in my ass, like, I don't care. And meanwhile, maybe if you're younger, you're and your inexperience, that's like, why does my boyfriend like something in his ass? And meanwhile, I'm like, let's fucking go game on. Like, put something in mind, I'll put something in yours. I'm getting horny. I'm gonna go do this tonight.

You're here you and see the grass fucking. I love it. I love it.

You're here. There once was a man that trimmed his balls with a trimmer and then proceeded to lift up what he just shaved his balls with and proceeded to also shave his face.

Every man out there in America, let me guess.

You shave your fucking balls and your taint and your asshole with the same goddamn razor that you do that you put on your face.

Oh, now let's really think about that, OK?

No, no, no, no, no. Man escaped. So what it does is it comes with a tool to clean up all the little delicate places and then they have a popular electric trimmer. It's called the lawn mower. I mean, the lawn mower three point. Oh, and it has proprietory advance skin, safe technology.

So there's terma reduces cuts by your notes. I mean, what a no brainer. Who the fuck wants to have cuts down by the balls. You want a girl's mouth down. They're not fucking cuts. OK, so guys, they also have the crop preserver and the crop reviver to help reduce balls, sweat, smell and stickiness. Does anyone play ball toner on? Oh, you don't. OK, well, when I want my face down there, I want it to smell like fucking amazing.

Not your sweaty ass, gross ass sweat pants hanging low fruit growth Dingley Bangali dingleberries. OK, we want it to smell nice because then it will make me want to go ten times harder instead of having to also put the dick in the back of my throat. I don't want to have to be clogging my nose. OK, so guys, you're going to get twenty percent off and free shipping with code Doddy manscape dotcom. Ladies, this is a perfect fucking gift for your man.

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Emily, the two words that I can not I don't even know how to pronounce them. But Daddy gang women have written in and I hear you and I see it all the time. Really what it started with is I didn't know the rhetoric that it how people explain it or the exact term. But all I was reading is like, why does sex hurt? Why does sex hurt? And so there were a lot of different terms that were brought up.

So Emily and and endometriosis.

OK, let's get into that. What is that? Let's talk about, because I think you also said let's talk about pain, OK? Yeah. Because rather than if women are having sexual pain, for example, they're having vaginismus. All the Denia. Oh, endometriosis. Oh yeah.

Well, here she comes. We love when she comes. Halbig ovary syndrome. Oh oh oh oh oh. Probably got some of PCOS is maybe. What is that. I've seen cystic ovary syndrome.

So for many women these are all related to our pelvic floor. I like to call it the power source.

Oh women's pelvic floor. This is we give life.

We give birth. This is the center of our creativity. This is the center of creation.

Eighty percent of women experience pain during sex at some point in their life. And most women just accept it as normal, like, well, I have cramps, I got to get birth. I guess I'll just have painful sex for the rest of my life.

But women, you do not have to live in pain. You do not have to, like, live a life of that. You have to get to the bottom and the root of it. So vaginismus means it's a painful when something goes into your vagina, enters you vulvodynia, closely related is like even touching your vulva. So the exterior part of your vagina is painful, but they're very related. Women have this and a lot of that. They can't really figure out it's more psychological.

Oh, could also be a trauma. For example, a lot of women who have had sexual assault. When you have a soul and you're not able to to really talk about what happened, we tend to internalize it and we internalize pain, suffering, trauma. We tend to clench, we tend to hold ourselves. But as a result of having some kind of repressive trauma, even if it wasn't sexual assault, you have a habit of clenching and tucking and tightening.

And so as a result of that, you now have physical symptoms. But what you can do is go to a pelvic floor physical therapist, like if you broke your knee, you'd go to rehab. Why? Yes. The good news is there's so many more of them now, but there were not even a few years.

I can't even imagine walking into a physical therapist like I'm here for my pelvic floor. I take care of it. These are life games.

You could have back pain if you've back pain.

You probably have some pelvic floor stuff going on because it's the way that it it is the power. It is a powerhouse.

So if you're walking, if you're walking in a weird way, then you're back, usually goes back to something going on with our pelvic floor. You might be having pain last 10 years and you go see a pelvic floor therapist for a few weeks. So you lay back, she'll do a checkup. She'll start paying you.

She does, literally. Why are you with gloves she puts inside of you? Oh, they just put these things.

You, the dildos and their dilators like Joe backstroking, literally, they go so much better than just doing like playing something with your. Oh my God.

So they and they put inside of you and as and so for women they start there's different sized dilators. Oh. And so for some women they can put tampons in, they can't put a penis in a tampon and you lose a little one and then you wear it for a little bit and then it starts to expand. It's really just your muscles have gotten so tight as a result of clenching, holding something, you could even have an injury horseback riding when you were I don't remember.

Right. And it's like, sweetheart, your pussy is not that tight. It's more so because you need help.

Like it's not Banzet so that you keep trading up dilators or dildoes really is what they look like. And then they expand and you open up and then you have sex with that pain.

There's like so many, but we don't have to figure out is endometriosis. That's a little bit different. Endometriosis is a very popular it's a very common diagnosis. So endometriosis is a result of excess estrogen. OK, and on top of that, if you're taking the birth control pill, that can also have an impact. We're realizing now there's a lot of really bad side effects.

This is a question I have for you. I have a lot of people that ask me. It breaks my heart. People will be like, hey, like I just found out that I was diagnosed with herpes and like, I do not know what to do and like, how do I even go forward and have a normal sex life? Like, do you have any advice for them?

Not a death sentence. Yes. And herpes are really, really common. I think one out of five or two out of five people have it. It you want to tell folks that it's a little something is is that it is not a death sentence. You go to the doctor, you take a daily suppressant, OK? And if you take a daily suppressant like Valtrex or whatever your doctor gives you, way less likely to be able to spread it.

However, you should also be honest with people, and I wish that people were more honest about it, because the more honest we are, you'd realize that probably someone else already has it. And if you explain to them what you're taking, what happened with the side effects, you have to become really become educated in whatever your diagnosis is. If you have herpes. So your partner knows like this is what it means that it's not. We can still have sex.

If I have an outbreak, I'm not able to have sex with you, but otherwise I'm clean. You know, I'm good to go because about having outbreaks. So it suppresses it. So you do not have outbreaks and it won't be, as you know, transferrable transfer.

I, I think I just want everyone listening to know because I do feel like I will never forget when I was in college and my friend walked into the locker room and was like bawling her eyes out. And I was like, what happened? Like someone died and she was like, I have HPV.

And I and I didn't I was like, so uneducated. I don't know what I'm like, oh, my God, what's going to happen? And we're all crying together, all around. And then meanwhile, we all start like researching it with her.

And like we every like it's like everyone almost eventually in their life, if you're having sex not protected, like you're getting HPV, it's so common. And so can't get the vaccine, I guess. Right. Twenty eight. Yes, yes. Yes. But like but like, you're fine. I just think it's important because I feel like when I was younger, when I was even in college thinking about myself crying because I'm like my friends dying and I'm like, no, she's not like she'll be fine.

I think that I want to it's not that I'm normalizing STIs on this podcast, but I do think there are so many fucking people listening that you don't have a friend to talk to about it. You Google it and it just if you have a headache, you Google something and you're like, oh, I have cancer. I'm dying. Like everything, everything. You think you're going to die. So I do think anyone listening that feels alone, you don't have siblings to go to, friends to go to.

It's not the end of the world because at the end of the day, you should not put blame on yourself because all of us are having sex. So honestly, here you go. I've been having sex without condoms. Like, I'm fortunate that I don't have herpes or that I didn't get X, Y, Z, gonorrhea, whatever.

But I could have. It could have, but I don't feel bad. So don't feel so isolated by yourself like I'm disgusting. No, Alex Cooper could have had it too. Like if there's one thing that this platform can give people, it's to not feel alone. And I do know so many people are so terrified. Oh yes.

You still go about your life and have a normal, healthy sex life. It really it's not it's not as awful. It's it's really not. You take you take care of it. Some people have one outbreak in their life and that's it. It still means that you have to, you know, tell your partner and you have to you know, we have a lot of information.

I just like to say, OK, money.com with tons of information that you could find out more about it and just know that everyone like there are there's a lot of people that listen to our podcast and everyone has the same questions. So just know you're not alone, although maybe your friends aren't willing to talk about it at the lunch table because they're fucking postseason. They don't listen to call her daddy. We're here for you.

And you say, fuck you, fuck, you know, so don't don't feel alone, Emily.

We it's like we can never we have so much to talk about to impact.

And it makes me excited to be moving to L.A. having you here kind of as like a someone like it is it's crazy to watch you basically doing something so similar to me that, like, I can now look up to someone and be like, look, she's normal and she's thriving and she's, you know, has a healthy sex life. And so thank you for coming on.

I really think we continuously are touching on topics that are eye opening. And I'm so excited to go put my finger in this guy's ass.

I got it. That's a big night. Exactly. Big night. So sex with Emily, it's everywhere. It's accidentally dotcom.

My podcast is Sex with Emily. We've released two to three a week feedback. It's sex with Emily Dotcom. If you have questions. I am sex with Emily in all social media. If you have Sirius XM, even if you don't, I'm on there five minutes a week, five to seven p.m. Pacific. You can call in with your questions.

Oh, thank you so much. Thank you.

This is a crowd of people that call themselves the Silent Suffering's and they don't like when Troxel. What we this is caller daddy, this isn't Gossip Girl, Chalke, Rufus, Jeron, Blair, Jurnee, Dorota. OK, guys, guess what? Questions are the motherfucking week. All you assholes are silent sufferers.

This is the thing I also recognize you do listen to the show, so I'll give you guys a fucking break this week.

Questions of a motherfucking OK, I'm sorry.

I do questions like what kinds of other fucking weak bitches.

All right, let's round off back Handspring into these motherfucking questions of the week. Let's get this one right out of the way. The holidays are coming up and we need to squash this piece of shit, OK, from a daddy gang member.

Love you to death. Love you forever. However, let's listen to this. Dear father, I'm conflicted on exchanging Christmas gifts with a guy that I've been dating for only a month. But things are moving quickly. Already bought him gifts. But do I ask him first if we're exchanging? I have no fucking idea what to do and I don't want to whip out this expensive gift for no reason.

Daddy gang were better than this. We're great guys. I mean, you'd think that you'd get sick of hearing me say it, but every time the question comes in, I'm going to say it again. Daddy, I love you so much. When you started saying, oh, my God, I'm conflicted about this, it was in my understanding that you guys had talked about the gift exchange. You went and bought a gift for guy that you've been dating a month and you don't even know if he's fucking packing on his end.

Hold the fucking phone, guys. In all seriousness, if you are wondering if you should give your partner that you just started dating a gift, the answer is fucking. No, it is. I know it sounds shitty, but it is always better to be empty handed than you walk in the fucking door with their little prairie girl skirt on and you're like, Hey, baby, I got you this. And again, you said expensive. This ritual expensive.

She's like, I got you this gift.

And he's like, oh my God, thank you so much. And then he's like, So what should we get for dinner? Like, he doesn't know yet. Can you imagine? That's going to be a no for me dog. OK, so my suggestion to you, Daddy, is you wait for him to make the first move if he never shows up with a gift during Christmas time. You go right back to Macy's sister and you go ahead and return that goddamn gift.

OK, dear father, I need some insight. So I hooked up with this guy at my place, woke up the next morning, went to my bathroom and opened the drawer under my sink. I see this black ball of fabric placed in the corner. I don't investigate. And I just think that my drunk ass threw my body suit in there last night. I go back to bed to continue with this guy. After he leaves, I eventually go back to my bathroom and the black fabric ball is gone.

Where the fuck is this going?

I think I'm crazy and was just seeing things. Fast forward to one week later, the same guy comes back over and I wake up the next morning and go to my bathroom under my sink to grab some mouthwash. And yet again, I find the same black fabric ball.

What the fuck is going on now?

I know I'm not crazy and I know that I saw it there last week, too. So this time I decide to further investigate. I take out the fabric ball and I examine it. Lo and behold, I find myself holding a black tank top. I then proceed to Google the info on the tag and I get the following results as Steam Aperol compression tank for moves. I have a I have a few questions, concerns about this. I think it's bizarre.

He hid it under my sink two weeks in a row. What girl doesn't go under her sink? He came from his apartment to mine. So why not just leave the tank there? Yes. He's not in the best shape right now.

Who is in covid? He doesn't have moods, though, but also girls were spanked. And isn't it basically the same thing? Is he just insecure? Are MOOP tanks a common thing that I'm not aware of? Added info. He has to borrow a hat for his quote unquote, messy hair for his walk of shame and has yet to return it. He also has been all over social media wearing my hat. Questionmark. I asked for it back and he's still wearing it.

Needed some input from the daddy herself and the daddy gang on this situation.

Whoa.

I think this is a first that I've ever heard of a mob tank, OK?

This like reminds me, this is so random, sorry, but when you were like girls were spanked and, like, hiding shit, I will never forget one back in the day. I remember Lauren got like clip in extensions at one point in her life.

And I was dying because one night, Lauren, I had told she's like, what do you do when you have the clip in extensions? Because when I was younger, I had a clip in extensions and I would throw them in. And then the minute I got to my hookup, I'd rip them out. And then you got to find somewhere to store them. If your purse isn't big enough, you wrap it in your jacket, like wherever you can fucking throw them, you put them.

And literally, Lauren told me that she was so black out that she woke up and the extensions were just laying next to the two of them. And she was like he literally was like, what is that? Like the extension pull out game before you get fucked is truly one of those that, like, you throw it anywhere. So what I can I. So you're all like, how does this relate to the game?

This relates to the movie game because the movie tank game because I, I sympathize with this guy where he's probably wearing it. He wants to look good with his shirt on and he probably like sucks him in or something. And then the minute he's going to have sex with you, he's going to the bathroom and he's taking it off and he's storing it in there because he doesn't want you to see that he has a boob tank on the thing. I think what this is, is he may just be super insecure about his body and maybe he used to be more overweight and so he used to wear it.

And maybe now, although you're saying he isn't, he doesn't have moves, maybe he's just so stuck in being insecure because he used to and it makes him feel secure and good and it allows him to be confident in front of you. And then maybe what, like the whole, like, messy hair, hot thing. It seems maybe like he is an insecure guy and maybe he used to have insecurities that maybe you don't see, which is brilliant and beautiful, that you're like, I don't think I think he's great.

I wouldn't freak out over it. I think it's just one of those things that girls wearing Spanx and then you run to the bathroom, you quickly shave your pussy. Like, unfortunately, I think sometimes we forget, like, men are people, too. And I think that and every man has insecurities and we don't think about it as much because women are so psycho in the amount of insecurities we have top every man's insecurities. I think you should just chill on it.

I think that there's nothing to be freaked out about. I would let him keep leaving his job tank in your bathroom. And I think with regard to your hat, maybe next time you see him ask for the hat back and say it has some fucking sentimental value to me. To you, you're like, it was my grandfather's. He gave it to me. Give me my fucking hot back. And then if he doesn't, I mean, maybe you say I'll trade you.

Oh, no. This what you do next time. If you won't bring the hot back, go into the bathroom, get the boob tank, hold the tank. Say you're not getting your Mbube tank back until you give me my fucking hot back. And then Guaranteed is going to give you that hot back because that Mbube tank means more to him than your fucking hot boob. I honestly love that question, but again, I think the more the story is, guys have insecurities.

Don't forget it.

All right. Oh, this is sad. OK, my boyfriend has this girl, best friend.

Oh, it's you know, it's the already break up with him. I already know.

I'm like, nope, she's been making my life a living hell for over a year. Yup. She's done nasty things like sending me messages saying it just doesn't make any sense.

Shut up. I got this more aggressive than they usually are. That's one thing she does. But there's a lot more. And it's got to the point where I snapped a couple of weeks ago and told him I was done and broke up with him because I found out that any time I said I was uncomfortable by the things she says, they would just laugh behind my back and call me Cycle and Psycho. And I don't understand their quirky, dynamic bitch.

Good for you. But is it quirky, dynamic to comment on all his stuff, saying, I want to fuck you, Daddy?

Dude, she freaked out when he said he was going to focus on me for a bit and she had a bit of a hissy fit. Anyways, he told me if I come back to him, he will stop a majority of the contact with her. However, it's been three weeks and he's already gone to her house for a gathering. And any time I see his photos, she has messaged him or stopped him. What do I do? I've tried every way for him to stop and listen to me, but nothing is working.

We are all adults, which is the worst thing, because even though we're in our 20s, I feel like this is high school shit. Dump him. Sorry. Nope. The fact that this girl best friend is commenting. I want to thank you Daddy.

They're full blown fucking or they're full blown, edging each other on being like imagine when we do fuck. Oh my God. And if she's saying that shit to him, he's fully reciprocating. He's fully fucking reciprocating because at what point in that relationship and friendship did she feel comfortable to say, I want to fuck you, daddy, when they were in private or when they were at a gathering that you weren't at? And she started talking about it and he engaged, she wouldn't be sending this shit unless she's a full blown psychopath.

But then why is your boyfriend friends with the psychopath? So my best advice is get the fuck out. Use this as a sign. You're so much better than that. Why are you in a love triangle with your boyfriend and his best friend that's saying that she wants to fuck him? Absolutely fucking.

That's not normal. Listen, I think that it's hard when people are like 10 guys have girlfriends, I'm going to go ahead and say no. I do know obviously some childhood friends and everything, whatever. Those are the ones that are hard because if there's no substantial evidence of flirting, then it's like, all right, what are you going to do?

However, this absolutely get the fuck out. Are you kidding me? I want to fuck you. Daddy will let them fuck each other and you go find someone else. It was strong of you to say that you broke up with him, but the fact that he was like, I'll stop a majority of the contact. And then you said, I mean, I guess you got back with him and now he's already at her house.

And what, you're not invited, sweetheart, like you're in a full three way relationship. You might as well be fucking threesome at this point because they're definitely either fucking or going to fuck or they're talking about it. And the fact that you go to your boyfriend and he goes to her and laughs about it, zero respect for you. Not don't even give a fuck about the girl. Your boyfriend has zero respect for you. I mean, so what does that mean?

That means you should break up with him. Oh, this is fun.

Let's get real. Alex, the whole daddy gang from Amsterdam wants to know, what do you think the best sex is? Makeup, sex, drunk sex, high sex, angry sex, random sex or outdoor sex? Thanks for making this amazing podcast. Wow. Daddy's from Amsterdam.

Hello. I see you. I love you. OK, initially ruling out outdoor sex.

I just I mean, I don't personally, I had sex on the beach and my vagina is not proud about it. It's like, hey, thanks for the sand, you stupid cunt.

I mean, Alterra sex, what it's like in the woods that I mean, I just it's just why not be inside in a bed and like not have creepy crawlers up in your vagina. Random sex. No, because you don't even know the person in their body and you don't know how it's going to work out. So it's more like a make up. Sex, drugs, sex, hi. Sex, angry sex. Definitely not drunk sex.

I mean, drunk sex is fun because you can get fucking wild and live.

But then also it's like half the time I feel like I like, am I do I really even feel my clit when I'm fucking hammered like that? So then we're done. A makeup, sex, hi sex. Angry sex. I'm going to take out makeup sex because it's probably like more loving and passionate and it's now between high sex and angry sex.

Oh, now I guess it depends on the person, because I used to have a guy that I used to hook up with. We had the best high sex.

That was one of the first times I remember having high sex with the guy that I actually squirted because you you feel you're like you feel everything like his dick and you rubbing your clit. It's all hypersensitive. And I think high sex probably. Yeah, high sex is probably the best.

But angry sex. I've also had that where it's like, well, fuck you. And then all of a sudden your head's in the fucking mattress and it's so hot. I guess it's between high sex and angry sex. It depends who you're with.

Yeah, wow, that was a good question, I liked that little game moment in question, a little, yeah.

Alex So my boyfriend and I have been together for a couple of months and the sex is great, but he doesn't speak during it. A story of every girl's fucking life. It's so frustrating when men don't speak in the bedroom. There's no cussing or loud moaning, just heavy breathing. And just like every other girl, I think it's hot when a guy is loud in bed. How do I get him to be more talkative?

Dude, this is the thing. When I tell you that I've talked about it before, one of my ex-boyfriend was a true mute through and through mute in the bedroom. Never shut the fuck up when we were in when we were not in the bedroom, but when it came to the bedroom, mouth closed. Gargon couldn't say a fucking word.

And it gets to the point where you genuinely are like, I just want to hear one thing. Just give me something to let you know you're up there. Here is my advice to you. You need to start asking him a question. I remember this is how I tried to get it going with my ex.

It it worked for a little bit. But then, like, I kept having to ask questions because then he would just stop, ask him a question or ask him to say something. OK, so like look up at him and be like call me a slut, like call me you're fucking slut. And then if he doesn't respond, you're like I just asked you to call me a slut. He's like, nope, can't even respond to that. Like he's black out.

Grab him and be aggressive whether you like, grab his neck or like grab his face and make eye contact like call me you're fucking slut. And then he'll be like, you're my slut. And then at least he said that, like, at least that's a starting point. Get him to call you slut in the bedroom point one. Then we progress the next time you have sex. But just getting him to say like a like a full line, that is a starting point.

Or if you do want to ask him to call you a slut because you like go to church and like you're like, I'm not a slut.

Alex, you could ask him the question of like, do you like that? Literally men. When you say you like that, you like that.

Go fuck yourselves, girls, though, if you're riding him or something and you look at him and you're like, do you like that?

And if he doesn't give you an answer again, you can get aggressive and be like, make eye contact with him and lean into him and look at him. Tell me you like that.

And then he's going to say something unless he is literally mute, all he's got to do for the love of God, all he's got to do is say, you're my slut, like you're giving him the line. Or do you like that all he's got to say? I like that. I mean, it's pretty straightforward, but I know it's hard to do. But I get, again, posing a question that will get him going. All right.

Here's a here's a little spicy one.

Yeah, I don't know how guys work, but I'm head over heels for my ex of five years, and he claims that he's the same way about me, but he can't get back with me because of what other people think. Parentheses, because I'm crazy. Even though he spends months cheating on me and gave me chlamydia because he was cheating with someone who slept with eighteen people and never once went to the gyno. Oh, we love that. But he also has a new girlfriend.

Whatever makes him happy, I told him as long as he's happy, I don't care.

He's still my best friend sweetheart. OK, there's more.

But then he still fucks me two or three times a week. So like why. Because you have a vagina and two is better than one. Sweetheart, I know he's he's into ass shit and she won't do it for him.

Oh. But I only do that once, maybe every ten times we fuck. So that can't be why he's still fucking me. Oh also last three times he came in me with my ovulation week and he didn't care. So like why if he has a new girlfriend like what if we ended up pregnant. I 100 percent want to fuck I will hundred percent send her a little inside in the mail that says step mom and that's how they're both going to find out.

And this girl lied to him about so much and is insane. Like, I don't know. What do I do, daddy. Dude, what is happening. Oh on I'm like reading this. This is real life. Let me just break this down. You have an ex-boyfriend who cheated on you and gave you chlamydia right there. Right then and there. Cheated on you, gave you chlamydia. Hit the road, Jack. Hit the fucking road, Jack.

And never go back. Sweetheart, if you find out that you have an STD or an eye from someone you're in a fucking committed relationship with, how do you ever trust that person again? Because not only is it like, OK, it sucks. You got nasty. No, that means that that person has so little respect for you and the relationship that they went out and fucked rort on somebody else or multiple fucking people and then came back and went inside of you and gave it to you instead of double checking to be like, right, I love her so much.

Yes, I'm going to cheat. But I'm going to get tested before I fuck my girlfriend or, I don't know, use a fucking condom, so let's first start going off. That's number one. Number two is he now has he now has a girlfriend. And you told him whatever makes you happy, as long as we can stay best friends. You are being a pushover. He's walking all over you. He's like not. He tells his friends.

He's like, not only did I cheat on her multiple times and give her chlamydia, I now have a girlfriend and she still lets me fuck, like, think about how it looks from that perspective. So he has a girlfriend and you're asking why does he keep fucking you? Like I said earlier, to is better the one sweetheart. Why wouldn't he keep fucking you? You keep opening your legs and letting him fuck.

Moral of the story. Daddy to daddy. I think he got to move on. I don't know Daddy's DME, let me know what you think about this one. I just think it's time to move on. I think that you could be toxic with another guy.

But this little love triangle where you're, like, not even fully in the triangle, your is just in the triangle, I'm going to give you the advice to get out of there and at least be the main pussy or at least the main pussy, and then he can cheat on you.

But like at least you feel like you're the main pussy, not when you're the side pussy, but like he won't leave you for his new girlfriend. And like, you think that you're getting power by, like, having him come inside of you. That just means that the minute that you get pregnant, he's going to, like, look the other way and like run and like move cross-country and you're never going to hear from him.

OK, OK. Hi, Dad. I need your advice. I've been seeing a 46 year old man. I'm 27. He's separated from his wife. But it's not final yet, isn't it?

Always it's never final. They have two older children together, 12 and 15. We only hang out at my apartment. I've never asked to come to his house and we don't go out in public together, no dinners, movies, etc.. I really do feel like he cares about me. But I'm also trying to give him the benefit of the doubt here because divorce is difficult and I'm not really sure I understand what he's going through as I've never been married, nor do I have children.

How do I tell him that I need more time? How do I tell him I need more from him without being insensitive to a situation? Also, I'm the biggest dumb bitch on the planet Earth. Or am I just the biggest dumb bitch on planet Earth and need to get out? Thank you so much. OK, I think this is a completely justifiable situation.

I think that listen, I also too, don't know what it's like to be divorced and have children. I can only imagine it is so extremely difficult. Also, I take that back.

They're not fully divorced yet, I think, because they're not fully divorced yet. And he you're not going out in public with this man, but you're obviously like basically dating. What I would say is. I would tell the guy, listen, I respect your situation so much, but I think let's chill for a little bit until everything is finalized, because I think it's getting to a point where we're hanging out so much. There are feelings involved, but not being I want to be able to go out with someone that I'm dating, like publicly.

Like, I don't want to not be able to go to a fuckin restaurant. I don't want to not be able to go to the movies and just say, like, this is at work. OK, hi, dad. I need your advice. I've been seeing a 46 year old man. I'm 27. He's separated from his wife. But it's not final yet.

Isn't it always it's never final.

They have two older children together, 12 and 15. We only hang out at my apartment. I've never asked to come to his house. And we don't go out in public together, no dinners, movies, etc.. I really do feel like he cares about me. But I'm also trying to give him the benefit of the doubt here because divorce is difficult and I'm not really sure I understand what he's going through as I've never been married, nor do I have children.

How do I tell him I need more from him without being insensitive to a situation, or am I just the biggest dumb bitch on planet Earth and need to get out? Thank you so much. Oh, I think this is a completely justifiable situation.

I think that listen, I also, too, don't know what it's like to be divorced and have children. I can only imagine it is so extremely difficult, I think, because they're not fully divorced yet and you're not going out in public with this man. But you're obviously like basically dating. What I would say is. I would tell the guy, listen, I respect your situation so much, but I think let's chill for a little bit until everything is finalized, because I think it's getting to a point where we're hanging out so much.

There are feelings involved, but not being I want to be able to go out with someone that I'm dating, like publicly. Like, I don't want to not be able to go to a fuckin restaurant. I don't want to not be able to go to the movies and just say, like, this isn't working for me, you and I and our relationship. Amazing. But with regard to all the logistics around it, I think maybe to protect myself, I just want to wait until your divorce is finalized and then you're OK going out in public.

Because the thing is, is you kind of got to test and see. Is is he really even telling you the truth, I mean, and I know that's fucked up to say, but a lot of people get in these situations where all of a sudden you're going to get two years in and he's still not divorced. Like, I know it's fucked up, but when kids are involved, you never fucking know what's going to happen. So protect yourself and bring this up to him in such a loving like like I totally understand, blah, blah.

But unfortunately, there are two people in a relationship and it's not working for you. He's getting all the benefits.

All right, Daddy, I love you guys so fucking much. Thank you for listening to this week's episode. By now, as you all refer to the end of this episode, I will be putting makeup on, putting my mask on and getting down and dirty with a man that I've never met. Hopefully this state goes, well, not sure what I'm going to wear and then I'm going to be jet setting off to see another man. The dick is going to be inserted into my vagina.

I'll give you guys updates next fucking week. Other than that, guys, if you guys want, go check out. There's new merch on the barstool store. Just go to bars. Welcome shop. Call her daddy. There's a bunch of new stuff. Phone cases, sweatsuits. I've been seeing so many daddy gang members shout out, I see you on Instagram tagging me, wearing your full tie dye sweatpants and cropped matching hoodie. You guys look fucking fire.

I love you all.

But other than that daddy motherfucking gang, you know the drill. I will see you fuckers next Wednesday.

Six, six, six.