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Do you call him daddy? Do I call her daddy, call her daddy. Oh, baby, what the fuck is Daddy getting?
Is your founding father your single father?
Your divorced father carried a gun for another episode of Call Her Daddy.
I am in a great fucking mood today. Oh, I'm in a good one. I am in such a good mood because there's more drama in my life. But it's good drama. I found another man. What? Oh, Alex. OK, last week I told you guys that I was in love with a man for a very long time. Yes, this is the truth. OK, but I told you also I'm not ready for a fucking relationship, so I'm dating and I'm going to continue to date.
And I think in the long run, that will bode well. If the relationship with the man is meant to be that, maybe it will be. But for now, I need to date. He's not ready to be in a relationship with me either. So we're both enjoying our time. OK, so who's the new man? Alex, what's going on? Tell us the truth, Daddy.
Gang, I have a story for you. So the other day I have a shit ton of meetings like back to back zoom calls and I'm in the groove. I've gone through a couple of meetings and then my last meeting of the day, I look at my email and they tell me that they are going to be fifteen minutes late. So I'm like, OK, great, take a water break, stretch the legs a little, you know, get the cramps out nooks and crannies.
And as I sit there, I have fifteen minutes to kill and I'm like, what the fuck should I do. So like the mother fucking businesswoman I am. I take to Google and I search who the fuck is going to be on this call with me.
At the time, I was wearing a baggy t shirt, not too cute and sexual looking. Why would I want to look sexual in a business meeting? Exactly. Then then I Google the main man that is going to be on this call, there's going to be a few, but the main one and I Google his name just for shits and giggles, just wondering what this fellow is going to look like. In my mind, I was picturing maybe a 50 year old man, probably married couple kids.
I put his name to Google. This man is not 50, this man is gorgeous and in his 30s and a fucking dream and I'm like, oh my fucking God, I got to go change. I literally rip my t shirt off, daddy and I sprint into my closet. I put on my biggest padded bra and I put on this like super white tity that makes my tits look ginormous and I get ready for my date. I mean, my business meeting, my date, my business meeting date.
OK, so I see he's beautiful. We get on the Zoome call and he is looking bright and tight and right. And I am like I am so in love with you. I'm trying to keep it together. You know how on a zoom call there's like a bunch of everyone has their little square.
Well, he was in the upper right. OK, and let's just say the upper left. That man got no love. I am staring at this man square the entire time. I have no idea what the other people were saying on the call. I have no idea what they even fucking looked like. Not a clue. I was honed in, very focused on my man in the right corner. He was so beautiful and so chill and suave. And I'm just like, I am so obsessed with you.
Can you guys tell I'm sorry. I'm just really excited.
So this is where the story begins because I've update's that literally just happened an hour ago. OK, so here we go. Drum roll fucking please. Daddy gang, I am going to L.A. next week, actually, by the time I upload on this episode, I will be in L.A. I'm going out there to do some interviews to get some fucking content. I went on my dick appointment and now I'm like, I want to go somewhere that will benefit the show.
Not me just talking about Dick, but maybe I have some guests on executrix. OK, I'm going out to L.A.. That will be great. That's not the point of this fucking story. The point of the story is that when I was on this call with these men. They are based in L.A. and they asked me if I ever come to L.A., and I said, well, a matter of fact, I'm actually coming in a week, you guys.
And they said, wow, great. Well, we should have an in-person meeting.
And so, as you can assume, I'm like, oh, this man has no idea what is getting on a plane and coming forever.
But then, of course, in Alex Cooper fashion in my life, never going the way it's planned, the guy on the call ends up being like, oh, what dates are you coming? And I say, the dates. And he's like, oh, shit, OK, I won't be in L.A. those dates, but my team will. So you can meet them. And I almost started bawling my eyes out on the call. I'm like, OK, yeah, I'll catch you around another time.
Yeah, I'll meet with the rest of the team. I'm like, OK then I don't even want to go if you're not there. So sadness. But I was like, whatever, I'm still in love with him. I still have my eye on him. Will meet one day. OK, Daddy King, here's a new update.
So this morning I wake up and I check my email and I have an email from him directly to me. No one else on the team is on this email. It's just me and my little buddy boy and I just about shit myself. I'm like, oh, my fucking God, I'm pulling up my phone right now.
He emails me and he goes, he said he says something about work. And then he goes, You coming out to L.A. or what?
And I go, I'm coming, are you even going to be there or are you going to be out of town? I'll be there seven. Twenty eight to eight for and he goes, can you come on the twenty seventh? I'll take you to a delish dinner smiley face. Oh it's like, oh my God. Yes.
So I'm sitting there and I'm like, holy fucking shit, do I change my flight.
So I get out there a day early and do I take this, do I take this business dinner or do I wait to one day find him again.
No, I don't think so, bitch. We change the flight. So I sit there and I'm like, holy fucking shit. Let's see how much it is to change a flight. I ask an assistant, she gets it all set up. It's not expensive. And so I message him back and I go a delish dinner. DataDot seems like a perfectly good reason to change a flight deal. See you Monday.
Here's my number now. I don't want to get too excited, but I am so fuck. Do you guys know how excited I am that this is not an athlete? This is a new leaf for me. This is someone in the entertainment industry, OK? He's so fucking hot. And listen up, Daddy's.
You know, I'm not exactly one to focus on the horoscope signs, but let's just say being a LEO, there's very few signs that match up with me. I'm kind of hard to love.
And his sign just so happens to be one that is so simpatico and in simpatico with a LEO. I genuinely am so excited. I've never dated a guy. That is his sign and I'm pretty sure it's supposed to be the love of my life. So, I mean, I don't know, guys, I'm just in a good fucking mood because not an athlete. His sign points to all the right signs. And I'm going out there and I'm going the first night I fucking get there on a little thing I like to call a business meeting.
And let's just say I'm not going to dress in business attire. And listen, I know all of you may be like Alex. You need to protect yourself and be be careful. Be careful. Mixing business and pleasure is not smart. I don't fucking know. Listen, I know listen, I'm going to be smart, but at the end of the day, I can go to this dinner, have fun. I'm young, he's hot. I want to stare at his face and I take full responsibility for anything that happens.
So I need you guys to do is just listen, breathe and support and don't fucking report me to H.R.. Okay. Thank you.
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That's Stich like Lilo and Stitch fix as in fix your fucking outfits you losers. Dotcom Flash Daddy Stitch fix dotcom slash daddy. I'm doing like little baby topics this week because I, there's just, there's a lot, there's, there's a lot of my brain and there's a lot going on.
This won't be too long, but it's important. Men and women all around the world listen up. I've had personal situations of friends coming to me with this situation, and I've also had Daddy gang right in, so I was like, let's just get one thing very fucking clear. When a man you are dating, I'm just doing man, man, this applies to you, too. If it's a woman when a man tells you. To block another female.
It means that he. Is fucking her. Are we all on the same page? Can I move on now? OK, if you ever get a message from a girl and she's telling you about your man and she's telling you that she is fucking your man. For the most part, if your man sees it and is like, oh my God, like, what the fuck, she's lying and starts freaking out and tells you that she is insane and tells you to block her on everything, the color of the flag is red, ladies, and that is the biggest fucking red flag you can have.
He does not want you to have any contact with this person because he is fucking that person. So if you are the girl sitting there being like, Hey, Alex, I got this message from this girl and she's like, you're fucking your boyfriend. And then I just don't know what to do because Brad was like, they block her. She's fucking psycho. No, no, no. Brad, we're going to have a goddamn sit down with the three of us lie detectors, motherfucker.
Strap in. No, but I'm telling you, it is a huge fucking red flag when a guy tells you to block a girl on all forms of social media. And I know it's shitty, but I've literally watched it, actually. And I'm just going to tell you guys what happened. A friend of mine got a message from a girl and the girl was messaging her being like, hey, I feel so shitty right now. I had no idea that he had a girlfriend accu and I just found out because I saw his Facebook and I just wanted to have the decency to reach out and tell you that I would never have been having relationships, relations with him if I knew that you were in his life in the way you are.
And I'm so fucking sorry. So I'm sitting there with my friend and I'm watching my friend literally start to believe her boyfriend because her boyfriend is like that girl is fucking crazy. I hooked up with her once years ago. That's usually what they do. They'll be like, babe, it was years ago.
Or they'll be like, I don't even know her, which is like the funniest one. But if they say it was years ago, it means it was literally last night. Years ago they had like a little brain fart. And he's like years ago I was in 30 minutes to go. That's where I was. I didn't go to the grocery store. I was inside her pussy. So I sat with my friend and I was pretty silent. And she's like, no, this is so crazy.
Like, this girl is out of her mind. Like, why would she be doing this? And I said, can do do you want my opinion? And she was like, of course, like, what do you think? And I was like, so to just get you to the gist of what's happening. So he's fucking her and I'm going to walk you through how I know that. And she just looked at me and was like, what the fuck what?
And I was like, listen to me. The fact that your boyfriend is calling her crazy. Her message to you was very fucking respectful and fine. We can say maybe she is crazy if you don't message this girl back and just ask her for proof, you're doing yourself a disservice. So fine. Let's pretend your boyfriend's being serious. OK, let's go down that path together. OK, so maybe he's telling the truth. Why the fuck wouldn't you just ask this girl for proof?
And she was like, oh, my God, Alex, like, you're being so ridiculous, like he's telling me the truth, he's promising on everything, on our relationship.
She takes the girl back. She asks for proof. And the girl literally sends screenshots of the day before of him sending dick pics to her and being like, I can't wait to like, fuck you later, Bill.
And my friend was like, devastated. But I was also like, bitch, how did you not see this from the minute your boyfriend is calling a girl crazy that you've never heard of? Why is this girl reaching out to you? If you are that dumb bitch that's getting messages from girls that your boyfriend or your husband is fucking someone else, you can try to have loyalty and believe your husband or boyfriend. But why the fuck are you not doing a little investigation?
Like literally the who what are they called the ace family, the fucking YouTube and all that shit? When that guy came out and everyone was blaming him of like, oh, he raped those girls, whatever. I don't know if that story is true, but what I do know for a goddamn fact is one of my friends has literally fucked the fuckin ace guy and he cheats on that woman all the time. And I'm pretty sure she probably gets fuckin Deanne's about all the time.
And the what the wife is obviously making a decision to, like, stay with the fucking husband. That's her call, whatever she's got, like a family. And if that's what you want to do, your cup of tea, whatever. But if you're in a relationship and you're getting messages from girls, I would urge you to just just ask the other woman for proof. That's all. Just ask. That's all. That's just the tip of the day when your husband or your significant other is telling you to block someone because they're crazy and they're trying to deny something.
Why don't you give the other woman just the benefit of the doubt and ask her for proof? What's the harm in doing that? Oh. Oh, wait. The harm is you literally finding out the fucking truth that you're with a fucking loser. Oh, oh, you don't want to know that. Oh, then stop listening to my fucking podcast because that's fucking weak shit. We don't do that here.
This is like a really random social media thought, but I just have to say it on the show because I can't help myself compulsive. I have to say it. I'm not even to call it the woman because I think she's going through a hard time in her life right now. So I'm going to give her a little break.
But here's my question, because I saw this woman doing this the other day on the Internet and I was like, what? What is what is what is that? This is a common thing that I think people think is normal. But I just want to talk to you guys about because I'm like, I don't think this is normal. I think it's fucking stupid, OK? I saw this mom, Kay. Posting her son's birthday. And she posted a picture of them together and she was like, happy birthday, you are the most selfless, sweet, caring young boy.
Like, I'm so happy you're my son, yadda, yada, fuckin yada.
OK, so the kid is literally like a toddler. OK, so to confirm this kid doesn't have an Instagram. So my question is why?
Why do people post happy birthdays? For people that do not have social media. OK, now I may sound a little Grinch like, but hear me out. This child has no idea that his mom posted him OK to millions of people the mom is saying is sending a message to her child, you are so sweet. OK, so say that to him when you wake him up in the morning with your fucking coffee in your one hand and his balloon in the other, it's the same thing.
And I don't mean to be an asshole. I promise you, I'm not trying to be an asshole. When people post their grandparents and you know, their grandparents don't have an Instagram, why are you posting your grandparents for their birthday on your page? Why are you doing that, they can't see it. They literally they're never going to see that. Why are you doing that? What are you doing? I don't know. I just think it's so weird.
I think it's weirder for the sons because maybe you'll go up to your grandma and be like grandma. Look, I wrote your birthday message on Instagram and and no one on my Instagram cares. But like and I know you don't have an Instagram, so you don't care. But I just I just because just because what you needed content like I don't know, it's fucking stupid and I may just be in a fucking mood today, but no one really cares about your kids birthday.
Your kid doesn't have Instagram. Your kid's not going to read that Instagram. So why the fuck are you posting it to make yourself look better? Nope. Don't care. You look stupid. Guys, hi.
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Speaking of men's flirting strategies, have you been on Hinge ever? OK, so I actually downloaded it for one of my siblings and helped him, OK, him my brother and I was looking at it with him because I had never been on Hinge. And it was fascinating because I was making fun of him for making you fill out these questions. And I was like, you can get very funny with it, but people that aren't funny, I'm like, you're funny, dude.
This is my advice for guys. Yes. Do not say shit like I love good food or I like to travel.
But you went to Panama City one like, shut up, shut the fuck up. And like, I know everyone loves the office, but another person is like, oh my. Don't want to open message me. The office is not a personality trait you think I get. I literally dry the fuck up. The second dude's like, oh, if you like the office. The office is a widely accepted comic who doesn't like to teach me anything about who you are.
What do you like breathing oxygen to reach over this shit.
And I look, I was excited that hinge.
I might like see some guy's personality shine. Yeah. Showed me the inside of Guy's brains. It's scary. I was I'm scared to go on hinge. I don't know what's going on it OK.
Rhia is like I'm really skinny artsy dudes with tattoos who like no bands that you don't know I know.
Or professional athletes who will cheat on you or they really have really match. I was going to expose him because I was like in the mood and I like match with the professional athlete on purpose because he, like, has his girlfriend and all of his pictures. And I like went to his Instagram and he's like literally in pictures with her most recent. And he messaged me.
He's like, hey, what's up, Alex? I'm like, so do I. He exposed the fucking shit out of you only. What are you doing?
Those are guys that have no fucks given like the girlfriend is on the phone, like profile you. I yeah.
I'm like and I don't mean to be an asshole, but like you just matched with the girl that has the call her daddy podcast.
Why the fuck. Why the fuck would you hurt me.
He's living dangerously. Yes. And that's a cocky motherfucker. And I don't like that. Some guys I think are on and then they just go, oh, I just haven't deleted it. Right. I'm not on. I'm like, fuck, yeah. I'm like, fuck off. And then Hainje is just like a lot of finance pros who are actually hot.
Tell me about dating Comedienne's, who has fucked you over. OK, let's go out. Don't get so I met a comedian and I fell in love with the comedian just like scene.
It's all about like the hang which means like after you perform, all the comedians hang out and just try to like make each other laugh and they all know they're like the funniest people in America. There's something so hard about their minds and how they work. I mean, there and people say comedians are like deeply disturbed, OK, which they are.
But so many are we all just with comedians is a lot of them are narcissists in a way that like it's all about them. They walk around all day thinking of content. I mean, now we're just describing ourselves shiftwork.
I'm like, we do that to us. OK, no, I really didn't know. It's OK. Well, let me ask you, I you that we never said that. So anyways, all these male comedians fucking suck. No, but I get it. You're in a room and you are like that. You get reinforcement because you make people laugh. Yeah. And they don't only need to like have you laugh at them. They need all of America to think they're funny.
And it's like a never ending chase for them to be funny. However, I've met some of the most incredible people, incredible minds, but I have dated comedians who yeah.
Like they don't listen to me. Like like they talk and they don't listen. I can imagine, like, do they respect what you're doing?
Like today I for you I when I first started, like doing tweets and Meems, it wasn't something that he was proud of. He was like, this is a great stepping stone for you. And I want to say one thing to dad again now that I'm on a rant. Yes. Go that like I know we talk about fucking hot guys, famous guys. And you know what? We've done it. Yeah, most of them are fucking monsters.
And I don't know if that's talked about enough.
Dude, that is like the biggest, truest fucking statement.
I always fun to brag, but like I mean, the I know they ruin narcissists are sociopath. Narcissistic abuse is fucking real, dude. And like your average dude who like works in construction is normally is probably the best fucking husband in the world.
And like, why can't I go for him?
No, dude, you're on to something here because I recently talked about it in an episode like I love picking guys that are going to be a challenge for me. I get bored so fucking easily.
But that's why I'm very similar to you. And we were talking about what we should discuss in this podcast. And I was like, I love objectifying men and treating them. How they treat us isn't in like when they talk to me, I don't listen. When they talk too much, I go, you're super annoying. Like, just turn on them. I talk about their height to make them insecure, dude, that I literally the worst thing to do to turn it on to them.
And then you, you feel empowered but then it's like. But they're still empty dude.
OK, I'm going to pull those layers back right there. First and foremost.
I think that why I've decided though that it's OK to see there's a lot of self talk going on I by myself and to my therapist about ourselves.
OK, I don't know about you. How old are you? 28. OK, I'm twenty five. I do not want to get married right now. You shouldn't. I know that your brain is not fully formed. Fuck no. Also, I have so much to fucking do. I know myself. The minute I would get a boyfriend right now, I would want to be single. I just fucking know myself. So would I rather dated a guy that is going to be like nice and good for me?
Or do I want to date someone that's going to constantly form my game and the shit out of my game and I'm going to progress into this amazing person who. Yeah, I mean, yeah. Now that I'm saying it's kind of fucked up, but I, I don't know, I like the game. You're nailing it because as someone who's 28 and much older and wiser than you.
Thank you. I think you you're early fall you in your early 20s are for getting in those toxic relationships. Everyone should be in at least one. And I don't mean should, but you're going to get it done. And from that you're going to learn the red flags. You're going to learn how it feels like to lose yourself and have to build yourself back up. And then the right dude will come and you're going to be so independent on your own because you've been so worn out by dudes bullshit that you're finally just going to be like, this is me, I'm exhausted and someone's going to go, wait, that's all I want, but I'm not there yet.
I was what they are. So are you there? We know and I actually fucking I'm manifesting bad. Right, right, right. We're we're in the process. We're getting there. I love that you just said that because I think a lot of people always sometimes will shit on this podcast being like, why the fuck do you always why is it always a game? Why is it always a game? And I also then can turn it around. And I have some friends that have been in like five year relationships and are so fucking comfortable and are so miserable, but are like I've been with this person for so long.
I do love him. I just wish, like, I could take a little break and maybe go explore. And it's like, think about that. Think about that. You say you're in a healthy relationship and he's so good to you and he loves you and it's safe. But but you're literally also constantly bitching about how you're like I just don't know if, like, should we break up and like, should I go explore a little bit that I almost would think that's the most scary fucking thing, to commit to someone and stay in a long relationship.
And then you're like, we've put too much sweat equity into it. And like, I just there's so many years I don't want to leave him. And then you get married and that was it. I feel like so many. And you wonder, what if so much time, your early 20s, how many minutes have you spent either getting a text from your friend or texting from being like, what does he mean by that? Do you think he likes me?
What's going on? What I do now because a bitch doesn't have time, right, is if you're questioning if he likes you or you're questioning, you should be in the relationship. That's your fucking answer.
I give you go to a psychic. Whoa. So you go to a psychic. She's going to do the same, I promise. I've gone to many psychics because I've been like, what's happening? And they they literally just keep asking you questions until they're like, yes, you know the answer.
Like, yeah, I'd like to call it the whispers when there's a whisper in the back of your head. That's just the truth. And you could ignore it for a while. Yeah, it's going to get louder until it's like someone screaming in your fucking face. So I think that I've been kind of like on a rant these past few weeks trying to tell girls basically just that, like, if you fucking think for a second that you shouldn't be with this person or, oh, does this person like you get out?
Because I literally. That's your answer. Yeah.
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So just press mute bitches because I'm about to fucking go off with a little thing.
I'd like to go to my. Goest you.
Oh, so wait for the questions of the why can't sort of follow questions, all the quick questions of the why, no questions of the why, no guys questions of the week, baby.
I'm going to read some Daddy Gane question. How are you? And we're keeping Hannah on for questions, because I've read a lot from you guys and you're like how the guests stay on.
So we're going to try something out, OK?
Oh, would this bother you if you were in a relationship? OK, so this girl goes I'll be the first to admit I'm very insecure when I went through I've gone through eating disorders and obsessively working out to be just what I thought my boyfriend wanted. I went through so much and it really hurts me that he watches porn. I don't know why. I feel like he just fantasizes about everyone else but me and it makes me even more insecure. I feel like if he could fuck all of them, he would forget about me and leave.
How do I get over this? Also, we've made so many videos together and he has plenty to watch of me, but he still watches porn. Thank you. Love you.
I think you have to think about it from your perspective. Like, don't you still get turned on by porn, right? Yes.
And you're not like, oh, I want to marry that guy or oh, I like I like put yourself in his shoes and like this also she needs to get a little more confidence in herself where it's like if you're getting jealous of a girl who's getting paid 200 bucks to get rammed by random dude.
Yeah. That your boyfriend has these guys are not getting emotional connection to these things. And you're turned on by fucking Ryan Gosling. Let him be turned on by some random girl online.
I think that's good advice. I agree. I think you need to get a little bit more secure because then the first question is like, so why is he with you?
Yeah, but he's your boyfriend, so why is he with you and you're saying he would leave you for these porn stars? And it's like, no, he wouldn't, because if he could go cheat on you, maybe he's cheating on you. Maybe that's your insecurity. But like, if this your insecurities about porn, you don't need to be worried. Every man in America is watching fucking porn. And for you to get insecure about that, honestly, I got the hottest girl with the perfect body in the world.
Her boyfriend's jerking off to porn. No, literally. And I would honestly be happy that he's watching porn and doesn't have like an only fans account and subscribing to actual girls that he can, like, literally try to slide in and fuck.
OK, also, maybe you should check that out because, yeah, I swear to God, I would never be down for my boyfriend having only fans like or have a script to subscribe.
A lot of guys tell me that like only fans are fun for like the first month, but then it's like they don't have an emotional attachment to the girl. So how much of the same pussy do you want to see when you don't care about it? It's true. And you're not even going to fucking ever know like and like porn is nastier. So, like, why not just go for porn? That's interesting. Yeah, I've done a lot of research on it because I think a lot of girls right now are turning on to only fans.
And I don't you have to put out a lot more of your personality on only fans to make them feel like they get to know you, because if you just put photos were like, how did you know like that?
I literally want to have a girl on that has one because I know a lot of girls are interested in it. I think it's going to be a phase.
I just like it's tough.
It's tough to stomach. Yeah, I would say don't do it unless things are real dark.
Real dark. Yeah. Oh great. Perfect.
OK, ok. This is interesting. Dear Father Cooper, I don't know if I subconsciously heard this one call her daddy, but I have been hooking up with this guy I'm super into after writing him like the daddy I am. He came and I went in the other room to grab a towel. I went to hand him the towel, but decided to throw the towel to the side, get on top of him and lick up his cum. When I looked up at him, it looked like he had seen a ghost.
Love you. Thank you, Father. OK, hold on. No, no, wait, hold on. This is the thing.
In the heat, fuck, I'm sorry, girlfriend, listen, that's not I personally wouldn't do that. Maybe you misheard me, but listen to me.
In the heat of the moment when his dick is pulsating and he's about to come so hot, if you're like, give me a facial. If you swallow his come, if you're like creampie, my pussy, if you're like cum all over my tits, you direct that man where to come. One of the hottest things you can do if you're like, aggressive about where you want that man to come. Even if he comes all over you and right away you take some of it and you lick it up a hot however.
The fact that you left that mantle and you left to get a towel. And you gave him enough time to stare at his siemen and have this post, not clarity, and be looking at the disgraceful thing he just did and he's looking down at his belly because I'm assuming it's on his stomach where he came and he's like, I hate myself right now.
And then you come over like the demon you are and you start to slurp his shit up like soup and like some good eating. Tonight, he's disgusted by you and you're part of the Postnet clarity. You kind of nailed it.
I'm proud of her for living her life. Right. And I do think that she should not feel bad about it. No, no. However, you're just saying if you're going to do that work, do it immediately. Yeah, do it immediately after he comes. They are dictums like they are. There's nothing going on. They your vagina doesn't turn them on. Disgusting. You could literally put your vagina in his face and he's like he's like it out.
Please. They're done. Yeah. So for you to come back and take his cum that are very specific about their come in the first place. So I would just say in the heat of the moment, fuck yes bitch. But when you let that shit fester, it's like you leave milk out too long and it's disgusting.
That's how they look at those are his children. Those are his children. And you're just you just ate them.
And he didn't even ask you to do it. No. I think you get a wet wipe. I'm kind of over the towel. These grown men getting like their t shirts and I'm like, just save your T-shirt. Get a fucking what? I think you also can I just ask, why are you getting the fuck up to get him? You do not what I was calling that we write like, why are you. I missed the whole licking the fun part because I was like, why are you great?
Like we why are you getting into his stomach. You lay the fuck over, he should get up. He knows how to clean up his stomach. He's doing it since he was nine many a times bitch. OK, don't know where he is. How we. Yeah. Why I wouldn't even know where I am. So listen, women, I think number one, most men don't even get you a camera. First of all, if he does, he loves you.
But second of all, never go get a man a fucking camera. I no, he can do that himself.
No, you're being way too wifey, OK? Oh, God. We got worked up on that one.
Whoa, oh, ok. Oh, this is a good question. This girl was like opinions on face sitting. OK, my boyfriend has expressed that he wants me to sit on his face, but I'm a thicker woman and getting on top of his face is kind of awkward for me. Any advice about how to do this?
So why? It's a good question. Good question. I also just want to put like a little disclaimer, like you're actually taking a seat on the. So that's a really important thing, because I didn't know that because I would like sit on guys laps and they would be like, oh, how the fuck am I? So sit on your face. You're the oh my God, no. If you're huge, I can't handle me literally like a guy.
Just sit on my lap like you're not putting all your weight. You're in pain because you're kind of lifting yourself up with one of your legs. You're never comfortable sitting on a man's lap. Same shit when he's fucking eating you. I'll bet if you are on his face, you are lifting yourself up. I usually hold onto like the headboard if wherever you are, you're not just like plopping down on his head and he's been, like, annoying, you know, suffocate that break his nose.
Absolutely. Suffocation by labia. I agree with you, but I do kind of think like you, you have to kind of like lightly krater yourself down and then right when it's on his face, like, you have to know where you are and you have to hold yourself up. Kind of. Yeah. And if you're if you're insecure about your weight or everything, I'm sorry, but it doesn't matter how big, small, whatever your vagina is.
A vagina. Yeah. And it's going to be right dead center in his eyeballs. So he's going to go right to Powelltown and you don't have to worry about your thighs or cellulite or whatever the fuck you're working with that you're insecure about. Don't be.
Yeah. And tell him to smack your ass while you do it. Oh, smack it. Yeah, grab it. Great. Grab, grab whatever. Whatever. OK, ok. This is a constant issue. I've dealt with it before with a psycho ex.
OK, I like to post the occasional bikini picture on Instagram along with some other third traps on Snapchat and take stock. However, my boyfriend gets so pissed at me for doing this and tells me I'm acting like a slut. I am so loyal to him and I do not want attention from guys. I literally do not respond to a single one of them. And the only guy ever text her Snapchat with is my boyfriend. I just want to show the world that I'm that bitch and I want to show myself off who is in the wrong here.
Have you ever had a guy be controlling of your social media? I'm like, I'm not that wild on social media. OK, I post, I post tweets, the guys shout out, go look at my list when I'm in a bikini eating noodles like I take it. So I get there.
It was so I've had men, Slim Shady, like actually he's the one that I every time we break up, it's literally because I've had enough. I'm like, stop telling me what to post on social media of your angry voice.
You are not my boy.
When I start talking slow, that's when you know bitches, mad, bitches, mad. Listen to me when I speak to you, you stupid cunt on.
He's like, I'm a man. I'm like, you're a cunt, you've a vagina.
And it's fucking a guy who does that is a fucking loser loser. And I personally, I love hot guys and I love to see other girls like him. Yeah, like that. Turns me on me too. I don't want a guy that I lock up in a basement. No. And occasionally talk to dude.
That's where I literally like I just think men that get upset about that. You're so insecure, so insecure and like they always have to go to like well who are you posting that for myself also be like you clearly can't handle a girl who's hot, right?
So get out of your lane. Just get out of your lane and break up with me. Yeah. And then what? You're going to see what happens when you date a hot girl, right? Go date some girl who hates her. So hate herself is scared to show her turtlenecks up the asshole like go find one bitch. Not going to be me fucking clit on the ground. It's still a kind of turtleneck and he'd still have an issue. Thank you.
Because the tits were too round in that one. I swear to God, I hate men like this. Any guy I get it great that a guy is going to see it, think you're hot and then like steal you from him too. It's so weak, dude.
Literally it is. It is so insecure and it pisses me off so much. I posted I think it was the picture, if you guys remember, it was the one where I was like, it's my ass and it's like I'm wearing like these little booty shorts that say like bulls on the back. And it was like it was a it was a hit. My butt looked nice. I took a bunch. We got the right one. We posted on the gram.
Slim Shady called me basically crying, being like, I just don't understand, like, are you trying to get other men's attention? I'm like, so we're not dating. He's like, but still like, you know, I love you and I'm just like I'm just feeling like, so we are not dating. He's like, I still play professionally.
Yes. He's a fucking idiot. So I'm like, so you are pathetic.
They also your fucking other girls. I literally said when we started this relationship again, I said we both have to understand we're both fucking other people. We both have to be OK with that for this to work. And he was like, OK, I agree. And I said, if you ever say one thing about my social media, this is over. He brings it up. I'm like, you are you are. You are treading lightly. Stop commenting on my fucking social media.
What does it have to do with you? You're not my boyfriend. What do you actually comment her. Oh my. On my actual. Yeah.
Oh my God. No, we we don't even follow each other on social media. Fuck now.
So it is a very fine line of when men do that. I think it's the biggest turnoff. I could never dated a guy that's I love a little jealousy, but that's like a level of like, oh, you don't think you're good enough for me.
You're so insecure that you think other men are going to slide. And I'm going to answer like, no, no, no, I'm with you for a reason. And if I didn't want to be with you, I wouldn't be with you.
Part of your career. It's so true. Sorry. The algorithm loves me to say sorry. Sorry. OK, talk to Instagram. So I'm doing it for my show. He's like, what does it have to do with your show? I'm like, I post my tits and then they go listen to the episode. It's math, right? They're able to see, OK, fuck no. But I agree. Any girl that's dealing with this, it's like think about do a little self reflection, like you're dating a little bitch.
Boy, I love a guy that can get like a little jealous. I like that. I like a little tension. But like, I would want like just to know that he wants it but not jealous to feel control controlled. Yeah. That's, that's, that's fucking wack. This is just a comment that I guess we love to just share the wealth.
Do you want to track your man. Questionmark Daddy gang leave your er er pods in his car and track his shit. But what if you wanna listen to music played on the speaker you dumb bitch.
This is more important. We can you track your airports. I'm, I don't have airports. I'm a loser like I'm doing well in life but not that well.
Wow. And I honestly can't even sit in the same room with you.
That's low. It's like a tip. I hate that. I hate them. I hate them. I lose it. I'll break it.
No, I lose them all the time and I regret ever having someone get them for me. I didn't. But this is interesting. Can you hear me if you can't?
I didn't even know you can track them, which I did accidentally take a man's air pod so he probably knows I have them.
Oh fuck. He's like she keeps you in the past. Like what the fuck. Yeah.
OK, that's my thing is if you don't trust the guy enough to have to track him, you cannot trust him not to steal your Erfoud.
No, seriously y no that's true. He's going to drive off the mark. Hey look, I left the fucking airport here. I'm taking them. I would never leave my earbuds with him. But that's very interesting. It's good to know. It's good to know. I feel like if you're feeling crazy, like why not.
Yeah. Oh. Oh. I want to ask because this is interesting regarding lube. Hi, Alex and Daddy Gang I. And with my boyfriend for two years, I always want to have sex with him and usually we kind of finish quick because, you know, we're parents. But sometimes when we go for longer, a longer fuck, I kind of get dry and it starts to her after a while. I know you're going to be like use lube, but how do I bring that up to my boyfriend without him thinking he doesn't make me wear?
Thanks, Father. So I have had this situation before and you just blame it on birth control. I personally am like, baby, my birth control would make me like, so fucking dry lately. I want to use lube.
And also you're not lying. It is hormonal. I feel like I agree. There are some times of the month where, like, I feel like if I'm having sex, I will be so I can get so much better. But there are literally times, literally just what your body is doing, like you're not going to get as wet unless you're having a full-blown orgasm in that very fucking minute. So if I were you just incorporate lube and just literally tell him if you are your boyfriend, if you have a boyfriend, he could be the closest fucking person to you.
Yeah. So bring it up and be like, babe, I want to use lube like my I'm so fucking horny, but my vagina is saying otherwise because of my fun and yet keep it about you never make it about him. It's like right. I'm fighting like I feel right now literally because again you don't want him to make like why is she not turned on. I just be like I feel like your dicks grown lately but it's starting to hurt.
I need so I need a little less friction in there. Be gone double, you know, literally. And then he's like, oh I love men or don't say whatever you want.
They would answer the question, yeah, as long as he's fucking you, you should be fine. This is going to be interesting to put yourself in a situation where you were in a relationship. OK, this girl goes, Hi, Daddy, love the podcast. I was wondering, how would you feel about your boyfriend having a bunch of super hot girls as their best friends? I know it comes down to just not being insecure, but before we started dating, he told me he thinks his girlfriends are so hot they're always commenting on each other's pictures and posting together and stuff too.
It's annoying because we're long distance.
So of course I worry he's being shady. So my initial reaction to that is, like I I do not think that if I had a boyfriend and he had all these hot girlfriends and didn't have boyfriends, I'm sorry, but like. I know if you are attractive and there is another attractive human being and it's the sex that you're attracted to, they are thinking of each other sexually. If this if your boyfriend has all these hot girlfriends and they're that close and you're long distance, I personally would be like, not about it.
It wouldn't work for me. I, I would consider myself a very chill girlfriend. But for you, I understand why you're being insecure, because if you don't fully trust that man, it's kind of like, wow, why are they best friends with you yet?
Understand your senses like women. We are always right. Yeah. If it if it feels wrong, it smells like a fish and it looks like a fish. I've never said that before.
I made that up, but it's what I was saying. Yes. It just might be a dolphin. It may be dolphin or. Yeah it's a piece of shit and it's a snake. Also I want to know individual likes situations. I might have dated her. Why are you friends with all of them. Have you dated her. Right. I want to know because if you're just a straight dude having tons of then are you are you straight. That's actually true.
I want to know the actual details. Yeah. I think especially because you're long distance if you're feeling insecure about it, especially because they're commenting on each other's pictures. And I think that you have every right also. Why aren't they dating you? Well, yeah, there's something that they know that I don't know. Well, yeah. Why haven't you guys dated? Like, do you have dead bodies in your base? No, I don't know about what's right and what's wrong with you.
Like. Yeah. And then are they cool with you.
Like are they open that like I know you exist. Right. There's ways of this working but like it sounds like she has no information and the lack of information is what freaks me out. I agree with you the lack of information. It's like you don't have enough information about these girls in his relationship. So that's fucking big, fat red flag.
OK, oh, I would love to hear from you on this because I think your vocal when like with what you want.
So this girl's like, I have a problem with this guy I've been hooking up with.
The sex is good, but he's super rough, like trying to be hot, rough, and it literally end up hurting. Like I can feel this man's teeth when he eats me out and fingers me so hard during foreplay. Oh, that's the worst I've been trying to tell him, be gentle, go slower in sexy ways, but it doesn't seem to help. Any suggestions do that fucking sucks. That's worse. That's a fucking worst.
That's when you just have to be like it turns around so much when you're like aggressive with me.
But sometimes I love like a lead up where you go really slow and then be like and then keep doing that and then forget about the other shit and then don't talk to me. I never do that again. So slo mo.
OK, gotta be like I'm so sensitive, my little Cletis so sensitive. So I need to treat it like a little like baby you're like an egg. If you go too hard it'll break like my little ba and like just be very careful with it and then he's going to be like OK. And if he doesn't get it by then then you got to ditch him. I'm sorry, but a guy that goes in there fucking jackhammer with the fingers, it's not worth it.
That's it fucking hurts you.
Did every girl up to that point just let him do that? I dude, I know women that let that happen and I'm like, it hurts and I get it. It's scary in the moment because you're like, how do I speak up? How do I say something? I remember this guy that was a fucking professional hockey player. I thought he was the hottest guy I was about to hook up with. This was when I was in college.
I lay down on the bed, he starts fingering me. He was going in there like, fuck. It was the worst thing I've ever seen, which is a jab, jab, jab, jab, jab. And I was like, oh, and I ended up fucking bleeding. And I literally didn't have the balls when I was younger. I think this is my freshman year of college. I was too scared to say so. I mean, I'm like, oh my God, he's the love of my life, like, so hot.
And I never hooked up with him again. And now he hits me up because he plays in New York. And I never answer him because I'm like, I know what you do to my pussy and it hurts. You don't trust the guy to him, like pushing you and all that stuff. It's not always hot, dude.
It's not also what you could maybe do if you're a confident bitch. You could right. When he's about to go finger, you be like, I want you to watch me finger myself and I want you to mimic this and start fucking yourself with your fingers and make eye contact with him and be like, now you do it and see if he can fucking do it.
I agree. Like, I would always be like slow circles, slow circles or to the left, to the right, to the down girls.
You have to speak up. You like get a new man. No, it's true. It's like I'd almost rather like get a new I don't like train one because that's so.
No, dude, it's so true. I think it really is something like if if you had a dog with the right temperament, I think you don't try to train one of these. No, easy. No, no, no.
You don't need that kind of pressure. You need to just relax and enjoy yourself. There's a lot of men out there that can finger you. Why the fuck are you going to do one that's like literally herding your pussy 100 percent? We don't need that energy. Yeah, and if you feel so awkward that you can't even, like, tell him how you feel. Yeah, but again, it's the I stuff like I like when you go slow.
Yeah. Oh I like when you tease me what I like when you go a little harder than stop and then never do it. Yes. And then fucking stop and then kick to the head when you just shut the fuck up. Eventually she's like oh felt like when you put your clothes back on and walk outside. I literally also with my.
No, no seriously. I agree. So Grover, I think being vocal is the key.
Yeah. OK. And you're allowed to be like I don't like and I don't like him. Yeah. Yeah. You don't always have to fix things. You don't. They just suck sometimes. You just never have to answer them again and never see them again. And just another one.
You have that power. I feel so free. I think this. Is it oh, hey, girl, so need some advice, me and my ex have been hooking up, except only when his roommate isn't there and she's a girl, by the way, I met her and hung out with her when me and my ex were together. But ever since we ended things, he literally we will only let me come over when she's at work. What should I think of this?
Are they fucking is he hiding me or are they together now? They're they're like kind of getting back together. I think that he's hiding you. I bet he talks so much shit on your asshole. And I bet that the girl that he lives with, he's like embarrassed to let her know that you're fucking again. And so I think he's hiding you. I mean, who knows? They could be fucking too close us out. Yeah, I would just be like, it's super weird that we only have sex, right.
Not around. Literally, when she's at work, we're like we're basically planning our schedule around someone that's not in this relationship. So like I'm just feeling a little off kilter. Like maybe if he says, like, I feel bad because I talk shit when we're broken up and I feel like she's going to judge me and then it's like, OK, let's work through. Yeah, yeah. And have an intervention together. Yeah. Let's have a conversation about this.
But the fact that I feel I have a threesome working out, let's just have like a little quick little threesome. You lick the tab, I get in there like no, I agree. I think, I think these situations, if you if you've also dated this guy, you're super comfortable of him, be like, yeah, why the fuck am I only coming over when Blow-by-blow. Why is his roommate a hot girl? Yeah, that's not it.
That's not. How did that even happen. How did that happen. Maybe they are so many questions. You have so many questions.
I'm so sorry girl. Yeah, you're fucked. But God damn it. OK, listen to this.
Hello single father. Recently I started sleeping with a hot all alpha mother fucker. He has opened my third eye to the most adventurous sex of my life. He actually showed me this podcast and has definitely given me the Kooch Gobbler combo and even made me squirm. Best part is he has fulfilled my I wrote on Feel Bitch is missing a leg. Yes. He takes his prosthetic off to fuck so fucking hot. I wanted to say fuck you with it.
I don't know. It seems like something's happening with that leg when he takes it off. I want to ask your opinion about a fantasy he shared with me about a certain vegetable. Am I crazy for being willing and totally turned on by the idea of him shoving an ear of corn in my pussy and fucking me with it love the show is the corn.
Like what? Has it been shocked. Shocked or not? Are we. She's going to get shot. She's going to get you're going to get fucked and shocked at the same time. But well, I don't know personally. I'm nervous. Are there bugs on this thing? Has it been washed as is it, you know, sanitized, putting corn up your pussy? Who knows what the outcome could be? I personally have never. Have you ever.
I have never. OK, so any type of vegetables, I always make sure you're sanitized. Clearly, this man is into some kinky shit which we love. Like, that's amazing that he's like taken off his leg and fucking you sideways. Oh yeah. Who knows. Maybe he does parkour with the prosthetic. I don't think it's the only thing you're asking me is if you should feel weird that you're down for this. It's always no, no, you're not weird.
Or like being weird is the cool thing. It is. It is. Go have vanilla sex. Are you kidding? You got to walk into a room and your fucking party favor. You're like, so I get I've gotten fucked by an ear of corn once. How about you bro? And he's like, oh, I just I use Magnum condoms. Shut the fuck up. Nothing. Just the corn. Like literally you get to flaks.
I would love to understand the why behind it. That's for my own. Why the like. Did something weird happen to you as a kid with I. Did your mom make you eat corn.
All right. What is the corn. What is symbolist?
Is it the movie of like the corn field or something hub of the corn field? Yes, I'd love to understand him further and but I know like the psyche behind it, dude, you could, like, pretend you all if you did squirt on it, then he could eat the corn with square on it. Little dressing up in this bitch.
Let's go. OK, yeah, girl, honestly, any time you ready to call her daddy, what do you expect? No, that's not weird. If you don't get fucked by that corn, I'm going to be you. No, I'm upset now. I want to hear I'm invested right back in.
OK, Daddy. Jane, hi. It's your father.
I kind of feel like we can all agree that Hannah is the tits and I fucking love her. I had so much fun doing these episodes with her. It also makes me so happy because she literally lives in New York. I feel like everyone's in fucking L.A. that makes this type of content. So it is really refreshing. Like, guys, not only do I have a person to podcast with and come down the street and hop on the fucking mic with me.
I also have a new friend, which is really exciting. When Hannah and I met in the studio, we clicked immediately. She's such a fucking cool chick and I'm just like happy that you guys liked her. I read all of your demos like an actual loser, no life. I can't help it. But I want to make sure you guys obviously love the show. And from what I see, you guys loved her. So I will definitely be having her back on.
It's funny because she's going to go quarantine, I think, for Summer House the show. So I'm excited.
Maybe we'll have her back on and she can explain to us what the fuck it was like being locked in a house for six weeks with a bunch of people and alcohol and camera crews.
I truly can't imagine, although I feel like I would thrive in that environment. I do also feel like sometimes it's maybe better for me to just be alone with my microphone.
All right, Daddy, that is it for this week. I'm so fucking excited for me to tell you guys about my L.A. trip. I really think sometimes I sound like a giddy little girl going on these dates, but it's literally what my life is right now. I just have to go day and get content and it helps a lot when the content is literally someone that I'm like panting over. So I'm excited. I will keep you guys updated.
I have a shit ton of people that I'm going to have on that I have set up in L.A. and I've tried to pick really kind of people like Hannah that I just like think are going to be really good with the daddy thing and connect. And again, I just wanted to say thank you guys for being patient with me. I know this format is different every fucking week. It's like, hey, Alex, like, what are we listening to?
But I hope you guys can hear I'm really trying to make sure the show is the best it can be. And that means just trying a bunch of different shit and seeing if it hits and buy hits. I mean, if the daddy gang fucking vibes. So I love you guys so much, I'll try to post a couple snaps of the man at dinner so you guys can catch a look, which is getting he's going to sue me once he heard this episode.
If you guys want, go follow me on Instagram is Alexandra Cooper. Sometimes I post nudes on there. I don't know. Go follow, call her daddy. And I think I'm going to hopefully be uploading part two of my apartment or vlog. I have a new apartment in New York City and I'm uploading that to YouTube. So go follow my YouTube daddy gang, you psycho fucking savages. Get after it this weekend. Get after it. This Humpday go humperdink, go ride your own clit, whatever you're in to.
Just go fucking do it because that's what I'll be doing in L.A. this week.
All right, Daddy gang, you know the fucking drill. I will see you fuckers next Wednesday.