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Welcome to another episode of your mom's house podcast.
Say your mom's house in Espanol. You say, like I said to mother. Oh, I like it.
Yeah. Death row is the label that pays me. How do you say your mom's house in Hungarian?
Analisa Azanian a really? I think so. If I said it right.
How you say in Hebrew Bitel emotion, huh. Yeah. Huh. Rose, so you sound pretty at all. Didn't sound nice. Say it again imaginable.
HANINA Bit emotional, like mute your.
So welcome. Hope you guys enjoyed the live streaming past the first one ever. Um, we actually have not yet done it as of this recording, but we know it has happened now. That's what happens at your mom's house. We record in the past, the future, the present. It's everywhere. We time travel. But we we hope you enjoyed it.
And I guess a lot of fun. Yeah, it is the first one ever and we hope to do more of them. If it was something you enjoy, please let us know. Let us know in the comments. Um, thank you so much. Did you just burp.
I did. Thank you. I did a fart in the where's the fart farm.
It's been gone. Oh God. Yeah.
Did you hear that.
Did it pick up that picked up. Yeah. That's a big I'll tell you why I am on a 100 percent plant based diet. We hung out with the Uri's the other night. Yeah. In Brendan's wife suggested this diet that I'm on and it is creating a lot of wind.
OK, not going to lie.
So also if you go to Merche method dotcom slash Tom SEGRA, we did it.
Come on Mark, don't be stingy. We did the stingy Merche. We also have a a cuzzi that on one side it says that the other side is its normal size, which is that's great for a beer, you know.
Um yeah. We have one hundred percent for a budget we have and we promise we're not going to hurt you.
We have the for safety ones really excited. A lot of people love the shut up and stuff. We have a mask shirt there.
Angel starts at fifty vitamin C Birte Kool-Aid. Sure.
It's so much sugar boy mom think boy all that stuff. Mirch method dotcom slash tompsett girl.
Thank you guys for support. I got to say just hearing you rattle off the names of those shirts really bright in my day.
Oh it's great. I see all that. We got some stuff to get into by the way, in the live show. If you hit that that I told you about, you can see Ed fucking so that we'll get into that.
You want you want to take a look at that. Only if you dare go there.
All right. Uh, you ready to start the show. Oh, my God. Let's do it. Let's do it.
I, I speak good English. I speak good English. You don't do not speak. You do you do not.
Do you speak English? Don't bring anyone into this. Well, welcome. Welcome to your mom's house. We don't support. And Christina. But. Pearls. Yeah. Wait times, I kind of thought, is this the ghost of Christmas future for me, and I do speak good English.
Why is your English going to fall apart for?
I don't know, but I feel like what the fuck's going to happen? I just feel like if I don't take care of myself, I'm going, that's going to be me.
And like 10 years. Yeah, it doesn't you I mean, like, how I look like I'm living a lie. I mean. Yeah.
In the way that I look like Ed, I guess it's things could really fall apart.
Yeah. No. Yeah. Well yeah. She's Bulgaria that beautiful.
My aunt. Yeah.
Her English not so good but she's really upset that people are insulting English, which is what I think is funny that she's upset people are making fun of her English and she puts out a video defending her English with poor English. Yeah, it's pretty great.
Hello everybody. My name my the Anna Nicole of the new minister of Tourism in Bulgaria today. I'm really very angry because people see I speak no good English. I, I, I speak good English. I speak good English. You don't do not speak. You do. You do do not. Do you speak English?
I have said that I have about about fifty seven or seventy eight certificates that I speak to good English.
Who can speak good English. Yeah, everybody in get everybody in government of Bulgaria speak very, very good English.
Yeah. And you do not have to. You do. How do you do. Do not have right to.
You do have the right to ask at me that I speak no English. Right.
OK, got it. OK, ok, here's the thing.
I actually I have a lot of empathy for people that you know speak English or another.
Like it's hard and it's not and I really do. I mean, I feel I never try to like my people trying to speak another language.
I don't speak especially, you know. But it is funny that. That she's making a video about the fact that she speaks great English. Right. And here's the deal, man, is that you can prepare a speech in advance.
Well, you can also edit this, right? You could you could have watched this back and be like, I'll just rerecord this, you know.
Right. I'll send this to someone who speaks better English and have them give me notes.
Correct. And then and then record that. Right. They don't put out the first draft. Yeah. That's what you did. Yeah. You put out you put out a fucking version that I speak English that goes. You do. You do.
Do not do you. So that's the problem there. She's a nice lady.
I feel badly for what you do because again, we're I don't think the joke isn't like, yeah, she can't speak. It's not easy putting out a statement saying my English is awesome.
Yeah, that's her. That's her statement that I speak English. So then prove that to us. And also again, with the camera angles, if you're ever going to film yourself, this is the way to do it.
Yeah, the perfect way to do it.
Look down on the camera. It's really the least flattering. Make sure that your chin is pushed all the way back.
Yeah, I good English guy.
Do you, do you, do you, do you do not. Do you bro. Do not do that don't do you. Maybe she's trying to be kind of cool you know.
Yeah man I do not know. Yeah. It hurts to laugh a little bit honestly because of your, your average.
So I had, I had to ok, I've never had surgery, I've never had anything done and had teeth pulled in your life.
No I've never had it. You never your wisdom teeth pulled. Oh yeah. Sorry I had wisdom teeth.
I think this is definitely different. Yeah. So here's what, here's what actually happened. Here's the full story for people so that you understand I we talked about it and you know, not only do are we done having children, but I'm on the road and I want to you know, I want to come in all you guys, too.
I'm sick of giving you one hundred and forty bucks in one hundred sixty bucks, get the morning after pill, you know.
Yeah. You got a little money box in my pocket. Money for buy yourself a coffee after. But you got to get that, you know.
And now you know I can just with reckless abandon just blow and everybody I meet.
I mean the only thing is you still have to worry about stocks.
They're not those aren't real. So. So I go to get the the consultation for the vasectomy like a month ago, and as the guys playing with my balls, he goes, he goes, oh, you have a I think you have a hernia.
I was like, what?
And he reaches he goes, Oh, yeah, you have a hernia. I go, I do. And he goes, yeah, does this hurt? And, you know, and he goes, well, you should you should go see the general surgeon about it because, you know, he could fix your hernia and I give you a vasectomy while you're under. So I was like, oh, OK, Tufa, now wait a minute.
But back to him, touching your nuts. Yeah. And how does that is that weird?
It's so weird when they check for, you know, what they do wear your sack connects to your body. So picture the highest point, right? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Under and the undercarriage.
Yeah, yeah. They reach their finger up under the undercarriage and they feel around in there and you're like, oh does it feel like someone's scraping it. Like it feels like someone's reaching into your insides.
Oh you know. So you're like whoa. And he's like oh yeah, there it is. And I'm like I don't know what you're feeling but I go see the general surgeon and he goes, you know, let me see. And he goes, oh yeah. He goes, Does this hurt? When I go, no. And he goes, does it bother you? And I go, no. And he goes, Well, you don't have to repair it right now.
I go, I don't. He goes, No. Oh, well, so I don't understand, it's not going to be a problem, he goes, oh, it'll it'll become a problem. Was like, what? Because it'll get worse over time.
But you could not repeat. You don't do it right now and then it'll get worse. So you could do it when it's worse. And I was like, I don't want to do that.
Well, wait, so you're telling me the great deal is you could do it now where it's giving you no pain? Right. Or wait until it gets more and more pain becomes a real nuisance.
And also, I'm not traveling right now and touring. Yeah. So but I could wait till I'm on tour and then do it. So I'm like, OK, so you're what you're telling me is I could not address it and just wait till it's delivered and then he's like, right really. I'll do it now. Pronounce it all.
He tells me by the way, about he goes, yeah, you know, we'll do it. You know, it tells me a date to pick. I pick a date and then he goes, by the way, this is going to hurt much worse than the vasectomy like this will hurt you more. After I was like, OK, that's it. That's all he tells me. It's just going to hurt worse.
All right, then. That's all I hear. That's that's the prep. There's nothing else.
Well, I agree. First of all, can we just one thing. What is a hernia? It's a hernia. Like you're you're pushing your insides out of your.
Yeah, it's like it's basically that like an organ has protruded from the cavity.
Right. A bulging of an organ or tissue through abdominal. OK, so in really bad cases it can be that you're like intestines like that.
You see that hernia on that guy's belly button right there on the left. Yeah, that's a hernia.
So it's like it's like the sausage comes out of the casing, kind of. Right. Yeah.
Mine isn't there. Mine was like if you see that you see that image below that one that you're on zonings. No. The other one. That one.
And you see, you see the guy the right uh right there were the the penis. That one. That's mine. That's weird.
Right there. There that's exactly. Do you give that to yourself or that just happens. They here's the thing.
You can have an incident where you go, this is where it happened with me that doesn't exist. Like he you know, I was like, could this have happened when I started lifting like two, three months ago? He's like, yeah, could have. But it also could be older, like, you know, I don't I don't have like a like a lift or I remember being like, oh shit.
Like I just did something that you didn't hear it pop out. Nothing like there was my organ. So anyways, he said on the scale of one to ten I had a three. Oh. So it wasn't like that prominent wasn't you know, it wasn't bulging to the sense where I look down and be like oh my God, the fuck is that.
That's that's usually when you're once you become a drawing or a picture, it's it's like bad. Yeah. Same like they they don't it's always a bad case scenario when it's in a picture.
Yeah. But that's exactly where mine is though. Right. But you can just see that that's so that's why he reached up under your nuts. Yes.
I just touch that from the inside my bike outside and then inside my body. Damn.
So anyway, so that's all they tell you is that's what I tell you, is like we're going to fix this.
And while you're in, if it was just a vasectomy, it would be an outpatient thing. And they do it in like a few minutes and they get put local anesthetic and then you go home, you ice your balls and blow up because it's the hernia. That's the actual real procedure. That's surgery they put you under under. And so he's like, while you're under, you'll have your vasectomy done. And so it'll be like a twofer. What's a great.
I get to the hospital that morning and I'm laying there, I'm starting to get let's just kind of anxious, you know, we're in a hospital setting. I've never had any surgery in there. Like, you know, they keep asking you, do you know what you're having done? I'm like, yeah, like all the different nurses combined. You know, what happens is, you know, what the fuck? Yeah, I know what's happening.
They try to trick you because they give you the only instruction they give you is nothing to eat or drink. Nothing after midnight. Right. Right. So that one of the nurses comes by and he goes, would you for breakfast? I was like, what I for breakfast? And he goes, you know, like, was it good? I go, I didn't have anything for breakfast. He was like, good answer.
Know how often do people, uh, fuck that? Up he goes all the time.
All the time. And the reason they do that is that in case you go on when you're under anesthesia and you asphyxiate, right.
You don't vomit and then choke, a lot of things die. Yeah. That's crazy trickery.
Yeah. They try to trick you into into giving up the info, you know, you could be like, oh, I had pancakes and oh we're not having surgery anymore. Yeah.
So anyways I tell the guy actually is a woman, I tell her she, she was super hot and she was like, you look like you not a fuck.
Yeah. Yeah. Because I feel like for a vasectomy they should make it enticing for the men and have topless nurses like I would concede to that for you. Thank you. Because you're doing this as a sacrifice for the family. Be like this is my husband's misfortune. I touch it. That's your last it's your last hurrah as a fertile male.
Go ahead. So anyways, I tell her I go, I'm a little anxious and the anesthesiologist comes by and she's like, we're going give you something. Take the edge off. In a moment. I go, OK, so as we're wheeling into the operating room, they give me something through the I.V. and it just is mild. I was like, OK, just like a little sedative, you know? And then we're in the room there and he pulls my pants down and he kisses it, kisses my penis and he goes the last time it's going to feel like this like but so now they have to draw a circle around where they're doing it.
They're like which is the.
Oh yes they do because sometimes they'll amputate somebody's leg or your penis.
I go right here and then he writes Yes, on my crotch. Right. There was no he does it. Yeah. So then anyways then I'm talking to a lady and she goes, you're going to be out here in a moment. And I go, really? Like how soon? She goes pretty soon. And she's just cranking something in the I.V. and I'm like, well, I just don't remember anything after that.
I wake up in the recovery room and I feel like I have like, just OD'd like.
Oh, like I mean, I could barely open my eyes just like, hey, I go, hey, what's up? And she goes, So you've been in the recovery room for an hour.
I was like, what? How much time is going to be there? Like three hours. I was like, oh my God. And then immediately I go back to sleep. Yeah. And then you come in later. And I think you said as I was we were talking I fell asleep again.
You fell asleep. So I walked in. Well, first of all, it's during covid. They really make it a lockdown. Yeah.
And so I go I can go in there and the nurse was sweet and you were like, oh, and then there was a Chatty Cathy next to you. Do you remember the Chatty Cathy? He was like, Yeah, I got to go.
He was on his cell phone doing the, you know, any way you passed out. But while you were out, we thought it was going to be a 45 minute procedure, ended up being two hours.
And I was in the hospital for three and a half hours waiting for you. But during that time, I saw so many confused elderly people. It sucks because during covid they can't bring their companions with them. Yeah, like this. This hospital is supposed to be the best in L.A., but they're not very organized. And so it's a tough place to navigate it.
Honestly, even if you have your faculties, you're just like there's so many different buildings in like P3, P4, different parking scenarios. And that, by the way, P3 does not mean level three on a parking garage there. It's a name of a building there, like a parking P3. I'm like third level like no, no P three the building. What the fuck is that like.
Just crazy shit like that. I know.
So anyway, there is this one lady there. All I saw in the lobby is I was waiting for you was old people losing their shit because they didn't know if they were in the right place because they don't tell you anything at this hospital, like, would you show up?
And then we're like, what do we do now? Someone comes to get you when? And there was one lady you can tell someone's crazy when they wear a sun visor indoors. I feel like that's a really clear indicator. Yeah, but she had on like a sweatband and then a sun visor, then the crazy blue Blocher's and she was sitting down.
She was like, is this where I'm supposed to base announcing yelling to everybody? Yeah. And it's like, man, what do you need done?
I'm having bladder surgery.
Look, this is the best it was the best people watching.
I've gotten along to check in who they are because they check you in in a separate level and you give them your name and your date of birth and. All that stuff, yeah, and they go to see like like the next pod over, they go date of birth and she goes, what?
And they got a date of birth. And she's like, Oh.
Oh, I just gasping for air goes like this happening, I look over and I was like, she's about to die, right? So many people about hirable. Well, there's nothing more depressing than hanging out at the hospital.
I mean. Yeah, but I'll tell you, the greatest thing that I've ever experienced is that anesthesia.
I understand why Michael Jackson was like, come over and fill me up with Propofol, because that is a sleep that you can not.
I told and I told you that because I mean, I came up and I was like, it's the best, right. And I slept that good. And, you know, and then we.
Well, here's the thing. When I finally get my shit together, I'm like, fuck, it's so like you're coming out of this haze.
The nurse sits with me and she's like, she was a nice one.
She was nice. And she's giving me, like, the post op stuff because I gave it to your wife, too. But this and that. And then I go do something for the pain cause I don't feel pain yet, you know, she goes, yeah, it's kind of mild though. And I was like, why? She's like, I don't know. I was like, why don't you give me something stronger? And she's like, well, it's not for me from the doctor.
Like, you'd have to see him. I'm like, I'm not going to fucking find the doctor right now. I'm in this hospital.
So whatever I leave there, we drive home. And then I take one of the things I still have that anesthesia running through me. I pass out again for like five hours in the middle of the day, which you never do.
You're not I am not a real napper. So I was like, Jesus Christ. And I still don't really realize until then. The next morning I wake up where it it kind of hits me that that hernia operation is equivalent to being stabbed.
It's so the pain is incredible because it's anything that engages your core at all, meaning clearing your throat, coughing, sitting up, reaching for something, pushing, pulling, picking like anything you do, you engage your abdominal muscles basically.
And it's and I had this huge dressing and wound there.
I mean, I was not prepared. I was like, holy shit, I didn't realize. I didn't even think about my balls. Everybody's like, ice your ball. Oh, my God. The last thing on my mind is the ball balls.
But your balls looked terrible. My balls were black and blue. Yeah, like a big blue streak.
It was really weird how symmetrical the bruising was because he's got these two nuts and then there was like a blue stripe down the middle.
And I have to say, you know, I'm not I'm like a shirt where my mom's and I may have been like crying just a little because I've had two children and two episiotomies and I've had to sit through stitches, but. Now, after I saw your wound, when I took over your dressing, I was like, oh, that's not good. Oh, sour balls. I want to have another fart for you. Oh, we're apologizing for diminishing my.
I think so. Um, it looks bad. I mean, you're both. Yes. When I saw your nuts, I was like, oh, that's not. Yeah, it doesn't feel good. No hurts. Do you still feel like jerking off? Do you still feel horny.
No, no, no. The doctor said you had to go. We had to go back to your vasectomy, doctor. And we were like, there's somebody in the world because you have to crank out 20 loads.
Yeah, well, he he told me a story. He goes up, he goes. So I need you to come 20 tonight and say, come.
He said, I need you to blow your load ejaculate jacket. Let me see all that.
So he said, OK, you come here was Ed Asner.
Yeah. He goes, God, he goes. So you're going to need to do 20 ejaculations, like keep track of them and then after 20. In a cup, bring it here and we'll tell you if there's any live swimmers, and then you have to have a second verification done before you get the green light. So, hey, where do you jizz your you have to do is in the parking lot the last load that you give him? No.
Where do you come in a cup and you bring the cup like at your house and then immediately drive it in. You have to immediately drive it and you just drive it in. Oh no rush.
Well, the sperm is fresh in life. You know, you want a fresh. It doesn't matter. You jerk off in the parking lot. No, no.
Well, he said I go he goes by the way he goes, you had the hernia. It's going to be a little more painful to get started.
So there's no rush because I had a guy who I told him I needed like 15 to 20 and then to come in here.
And he came in here like 48 hours later.
Oh, he was like, are you telling me to get the man? He's like, Jesus, man. So you're going to destroy your your dick. You know, he did it right after. Yeah, yeah, yeah. He just kept jerking off over and over.
Well, I thought for sure that there would be somebody dumb enough because, you know, like there's.
Oh that's good.
Because what if somebody thought that your doctor had jerked you off 20 times? Yeah. Yeah. And that's why I was like, do you want to do the first one? I want to make 20 appointments with the doctor and he masturbate too big a load.
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But yeah, this is way more painful than I thought. I know. Yeah. And I like that you diminish the pain that makes me hate you now. Yeah. Yeah. You know I love you. I don't. I had two babies. What does it have anything to do with anything. So much pain. Let me, let me, let me let me. This is a narcissistic point of view. You're taking all about you.
Here we go. Nine months of pregnancy. First of all, no one cares.
We're not talking about the two miscarriages. Very painful. We're not talking about that.
I did all of this for my for my family. Just like what you're doing is for your family. I did this for our family. I had I had bad acid reflux, narcissist, narcissism, narcissism, narcissism.
I had to deliver two of her children.
And no one's talking about you. My tits are ruined. Stop making it about you. Wait in the lobby for like three hours and I the wife, I wasn't as good as I'd hoped and the food wasn't good and the and the after.
Don't I suffer, too, for this vasectomy hernia operation?
No. This makes me just think you're such an asshole. I guarantee there's going to be such a notable shift in more people hating you. Oh, my God. More notable shift. Yeah.
After this episode comes out, what are you talking about for this? You're being a real jerk. What do you think? They hate me already for sure.
But I think more people will hate you now. Oh, my gosh. Yeah, you're being a jerk. I think you just hate me now more. That's true. But I'm with them is what I'm saying.
Making this about you and denying my pain, but I just apologize that you didn't really apologize. I said I'm sorry. No, you didn't.
Oh, I didn't know. Sorry I diminished your pain. And I'm sorry. But the snacks were not good in the hospital. Oh. I love you, I don't. I don't know. I don't even a little bit. I think you're a terrible person. Can I read some listener feedback?
What are you doing? What are you doing? All right. Why do not you put up my son's car three times? You pull the sticker off it. You quietly go to Parko, somebody's life is here. Don't get too close, please, but I don't want to grieve. So you. Well, you are, unfortunately. Well, only if you don't mind.
I've called you back off. You start vandalizing my fucking car. Oh, you're a bully boy. You're a thief.
Just get away with stealing from your workplace. I'm stealing from work. You're a criminal. Why I a criminal? Why aren't using your phone? Oh, it's good evidence to just keep track.
Who is this. Somebody drive.
She's just a you. This is on tick tock.
Oh how did I miss this bams. You know what I what I like about her and I have the same problem is when you have a large chest, you have from wearing button down shirt.
This is, by the way, the ghost of Christmas future legal. It does look like you have somebody.
You have a similar chest, a similar face, similar hair and similar shoulders.
I think you have it together. Like I can tell you, you've got two, one, two, three, four.
So, yeah, that her hangers are not supported properly. I think you're such an asshole. You're still mad at me. I am. I think you're such a dick. I'm sorry you mock my pain, I was I was comparing it, this is before you were really in pain. I remember I taped it the day after and you hadn't. Whoa, whoa. What do you mean? I did wear my mom's out the day after your procedure.
You taped it on Friday. I taped it on Friday, remember? Yeah. And I was like, oh, Thom's hernia. Like, I was just, you know, you fucking dick.
I said, I'm sorry, OK, I hate you. I love you. I hope you get run over by a bus. I'm sorry I said, yeah, listen, I can't wear a button down shirt.
All right? I can't. Why are you going? I can't find you fucking pulling myself touch with these guys, but I hope that your new boyfriend come out the soccer.
Why are you all right? Why are you telling me I can fuck you see, now I feel good because I'm channeling him towards you.
Oh, Tom, I thought it was awesome.
It's good to see that the UK finds out like we did not fuck. Yeah. Fuck in front of the camera.
He's on the camera.
What do you what are you imagining, and I'm the bus driver.
Yes, I imagine that you're the bus driver.
Nice suit on the.
That's great. Now he's got some cans of beer to give us something to do with it.
We're going to open it up for. Holy shit, that was awesome. Great, yeah, those was deserved every second of it. Are you happy again?
Do you know love me again? No. Do you love me again? No. On a scale of one to 10 fucking diarrhea shit.
Love me again. No. Do you do. Do not. Do you.
Fucking unbelievable. You know what's great, though, is that I always feel like Americans are flipping are losing their shit on these videos, and it's good to see that the UK can lose this.
I think there's a good amount of UK people losing their shit.
Maybe it's just that I feel like there's so much more refined than us because of shows like Downton Abbey. I assume that all English people are like the people in Downton Abbey.
Yeah, they're just not some of them are. You know, there's people all over the world that don't have their shit together all over the world.
It doesn't matter what you're slithering. I'm just learning your language, your language. It's all over fucking brother. Why? Because we're standing right behind you. Fucking try to fucking try my fucking. Oh, God, she's fucking hot.
She's super hot. Stop it.
You're possessed by somebody, who are you? I'm the only one, I'm the last and the last of the peers, the line. To tell my fucking walking Miami Beach, the beach, look up at the sky, that's what you don't appreciate because that's Apollo Creed, October 12. So I'm a fucking blessing, but I'll fucking make it rain on your ass. That's what all the stars. That's how we want our fucking 50 take off at and the tip of the spear.
You're lucky someone's going to shank you.
And, you know, she's cool. I like this chick. I like her, too. And I think actually she is very pretty. She is. And this is the kind of girl it's worth it to go out with, like just to see what happens.
Well, here's the thing. We're talking about crazy chicks now. Is she going to be a good lay? Yes, that's the good like. Absolutely. But hold on. It does look a little she's not too far from the lady at the bus stop in the pink fanny pack and the pink skullcap. Right. I mean. Remember, we saw oh, and at the bus stop? No, I mean, it's look, if you sleep with her, it's going to be a good experience.
You're your your living room is going to be set on fire and you're probably going to have your, you know, your windshield cracked and shit like that. You're going to lose material goods, but it's worth it. Yeah.
She might steal your Social Security. She might do things to jeopardize your well-being, but it'll be a good lay, you know.
Yeah, she's, uh.
Yeah, she you short you she'll try to hurt you. Yeah. Yeah. But that's exciting for you is what you're saying. Absolutely. Yeah. Yeah.
She's exciting because I'm a mermaid. Oh stop, stop. It's just my body before I take your bike. That's not cool enough. You better not touch me, bitch.
Now what language is she speaking?
A language that I know what is what. It's spoken in Guam. There's got to be a second language.
I know this fuckin it's got to be another island language. They're right.
Oh Comodo Como Trimodal. Oh not Schlomo. Jesus Christ.
How do you get a job here fuckface. Learn choma.
You know that he did an interview. He did an interview. Connell's Connel. Somebody asked him like some of these pressing questions.
Yeah. About like baby rapert stuff. It's the audio only thing.
But they, they asked them how do you remember me.
I don't know, I just wanted to check on you again and maybe ask you a few more questions if that will be alright.
Are you busy, brother? I've always had some worktops very good where I'm on the road right now. You sure you should be talking to you on the road? Isn't it kind of dangerous? A smoker. I'm going to take down cops right now during this call, if you're always on the move. Then how do you how do you get money? How do you make a living? God gave it to me.
I don't know if you're Christian or not. Everywhere I go, I get a full tank of gas.
Is it for free? For free. Because of what I do, you know. Yeah.
You sit in your car, but a lot of your video is going to show you in different rooms like like hotel rooms or apartments or something. And I'm not really sure what's going on.
I usually run into a lot of things around here. All right. There are a lot of different people out here. I know a lot of people.
A lot of people. There's a lot of baby rape or a legitimate term like are they legitimately baby rapers or is it just like a term?
It is just a plan to deal with my daughter in my work with Jessica's. Now, the one that labels these papers are very dangerous. Yeah, I like that.
Is that well thought out? He's like and he's like familiar with the term slander. He's like I, I've gotten phone calls about slander a few times. Yeah. Yeah. Well yeah.
You never actually heard of anyone who's a legitimate, maybe relevant slang for a pedophile profile. Yeah. I get more of a punch.
Yeah. Yeah it does have more of a punch to it. If you ever been shot.
I have been shot. I mean you have to think that, I mean I believe that everything is being beat up. So that's stuff that I can't see that I can't do what I do.
OK, well, well never been beat up but he's been shot and stabbed. So did you ever actually put anyone away? Because I think you said something about putting some guy called just Sadoway or something like that.
That's the point down the line. What state was that in Nebraska? Yeah, hi.
My name is Matt. All right.
Yeah. So what is the origin of this? I mean, this guy is asking all the important questions. Yeah, it was a guy that that just went through, like found Fed smoker and then had an interview with him, I think Zolo actually prepped all. Do you have any background info on them?
Yeah, because he's very well versed in this guy's career as a Fed smoker. Yeah, so this guy, he was just a fan of smokers and he found them through YouTube and he managed to contact him through one of his many YouTube channels and he got his phone number and he just was willing to do an interview.
And then when he just answered the phone, answered all these questions and then like 20 minutes and he's like, hey, what's your name?
Yeah, like, yeah, answers all these guys. He's like, who are you? Yeah. By the way. So, wait, how long ago was this?
Several years back. I don't remember the exact year.
Wow. That's pretty crazy that this guy had a fan base essentially. Yeah. Before we picked up on his work. This guy really I mean, one of the things about him is that he set up so many YouTube channels like that guy that we interviewed last week, remember, he was saying I remember in one of his video, in one of his videos, he was insulting him for like, oh, did you move to this or this? Because he doesn't just stay in one place.
He just has like 15 YouTube channels, which obviously is you know, it's the mystery of a smoker. You have to, like, hunt down all the clues, but it's also a burden to anybody trying to follow him.
Like you have fucking 15 channels, man, be doing it adds to the law, to the.
Are you say again. You there, Mr. Smoker, not sure what's going on here. He sounds like a smoker, too, doesn't he? You go, that's it.
That's the attorney for a pedophile.
Now, he does make a good point. That baby raper is a little harsher. It's a bit of more of a punch. His pedophile does sound more clinical. Yeah, he's got a good point there.
Yeah. Yeah, he's really good at branding. But that guy that interviewed him sounded a little like the Fed smoker.
He kind of. Yeah, like so yeah. Why baby raper.
He's like isolated smoker. He's of.
Interesting that you caught on to that.
Can I read some listener feedback. Yes. It was just just general feedback's going through the emails. I looked up the pulse of the show. This is from episode 560, A Pilot's Perspective.
Hey, Tom and Christine. I'm an airline pilot and fly for a U.S. based airline. As I was watching Episode five 60, I heard you mention that some flight attendants are real dogs.
I have to agree with you, as I've seen plenty, some slovic, they walk sideways down the aisles is as for Potter's comments, we have many cool black guy flight attendants.
They exist. I love the podcasts and always keep them high and tight. Oh, this is from Christina.
This is a lady. Oh, writing this. So that's even more interesting that she agrees that some flight attendants are dogs.
Yeah, yeah, she's right. There certainly are. Thanks, Christine.
That's too bad. Yeah. Yeah. I think we should make a no dogs allowed policy.
And I agree the flight attendants are female.
OK, so we were discussing Darmanin last episode and he's really put a special place in your heart.
Everybody that I've sent, I've sent his videos to friends like, you know, not people that listen to the podcast and they're all all react the same way. What the fuck is going on. Yeah. What is this.
He he upsets you a lot. I yeah. I sense that it really sticks in your craw. What particularly upsets you.
It's nonsense. It's just such utter nonsense. People that, by the way, have suggested to me some people that that he is like using bots for. Yes. Like that he employs like a factory of bots somewhere to drive this up. Jack up the numbers.
Yeah, we I sense that because they're so bad, they are bad. But I have to admit that I enjoy bad to a certain.
Yeah. Yeah, it's amusing. It's funny. So how bad it is. Yeah.
And um but I mean the lessons are so like basic, you know, rudimentary like to have you know, don't mistreat a poor white. I know like gosh.
But he does seem a little inauthentic at the end when he's like Hey Jeromy and him, it's kind of like you guys remember we're not just making videos, we're changing lives.
Yeah, we're just making videos. Do your mommies, after listening to DA Man's cool videos and hearing your curiosity, I found I can easily tell you the target audience teenagers.
As a high school faculty member, I can tell you they are in great need of this basic human guidance and that I would consider using these videos with students. Why, you ask?
Well, I know of or have witnessed teenagers urinating on homeless man's bed, rolling back, referring to dented cans and bottles as having Down syndrome, bouncing their hands off black students hairdos and tricking overweight students into streaking on camera while blindfolded.
But what their Armand's videos have the potential to teach these subhumans how to not get murdered in the real world. Thanks, DA man. So stingy, Paul.
This is somebody suggesting that these are best for teenagers like people who don't know proper behavior, but heavily damaged, heavily teenagers.
Seriously, someone in rehab or something? Yeah, it's people who really don't understand how to live, you know. Yeah. Christian community maybe watches it or. Yeah, it's like those old dagoes, by the way, has felony charges that they.
I know. Yeah. For fraud and forgery.
Oh yeah. Legit charges. Oh here it is.
Yeah. They charge him with four counts of grand theft, two counts of attempted grand theft, six counts of forgery. So he's.
Wow. Yeah. But that was before I started making these videos man.
That is. They're just strange. The videos are fucking strange man. Wow. That's just the world is a special place. OK, five strokes dental update. I recently listened to your podcast.
You mentioned your new high Jenness five stroke flossing technique.
Remember I mentioned that I was told that you're not doing it right, that I wasn't flossing correctly.
And so she said, you have to go. One, two, three, four, five. One, two, three, four, five. At first I thought.
She was batshit crazy, like fed smoke or crazy, but decided to try it out as a regular foser, I was a bit surprised to see thick, hot, red blood, more blood than there's ever been in my life, especially since I didn't smoke any meth first and figured maybe it was a good thing.
My gums were so sensitive afterwards about flossing is supposed to be painful, right? Anyways, crazy Patty is on to something and I'll continue to five stroke it up because it shouldn't take, quote, 10 minutes unless you're completely awkward and love you.
Mommy. Piss me. Beat me, Megan. So that's really interesting that you guys are now trying the five stroke flossing technique and let me know if it works for you. We could start a whole new five stroke flossing movement.
I feel like the flossing technique has to be out there already. Right? I mean, this is this new it was new to me.
And as somebody the pride themselves on being. Yeah, you've always been a big Blosser, but now I'm into the soft stick floss and I go through it every night. I go I do five, five, five, five. And that's been really helpful for me. So let me know if you guys are fucking Jew friend.
That clip that says he's not a fucking Jew. Yeah, that's not the way I would introduce our friend.
I wouldn't say it like that. We would totally revise the way I bring up that guy.
How do you bring him up? I don't know. How do you are mousepad friend of the mousepad? Yeah.
Sorry, guys, I am a fucking Jew. OK, that guy. Yes, you're yummy pussy. Yes.
Yummy pussy guy. Hey, Mommy's homeboy is a Jew and not Russian because Ashkenazi Jews are both a race and religion because of the ramp height and ramp height. Because of the rampant anti-Semitism in the Slavic world. A lot of Jews don't see themselves as Russian, but ethnically Jews. For example, my mother was born in the USSR and what today would be Ukraine. She spoke Ukrainian, the local dialect and Russian, which is why they taught them in school and she had a Russian name.
But when I did 23 and me, I found that I don't have even a little bit of Slavic blood in me. Just sixty percent fucking Jew from my mom's side.
So there you go. So that's just an interesting perspective. It's both a race and a religion. What do you think, Nadaf? Any thoughts?
Yeah, I absolutely agree. I mean, that's why you could look at someone and be like, oh, yeah, that's. Did you see did you did you see the Oakland A's coach that that whole storyline? No. So can you go to my Twitter? You'll see if you if you go to my Twitter, because it's got a. Yeah, some people I couldn't believe that anybody, like, took issue, you just scroll here, scroll a little more, you'll see the video a little bit more there, this guy.
OK. And then. So that that coach gotten some heat, right? So apparently the A's, they do karate chops, so the fist bumps, you know, when they come on how you do karate chop.
So I'm giving you the full story. So they do karate chops, like instead of fist bump. You can see some of them doing this, right? Yes. So that guy is waiting for players and he has arm extended palm down. And then you can see that one of the players grabs his arm is like, hey, probably don't don't do it like that.
And then he does body language suggests like, yeah, you're right, I shouldn't do this, but he does it again and whatever. I don't think his life should be over. But I just made a comment, you know, mockery kind of of it above their right, where I say, what's the big deal? It's just the standard salute you use to greet the future or the folks or the fellows after a double play. Baseball is.
But so many people were like, you're inflaming this.
Sorry, sorry that I quoted a video of a guy who's clearly has his arm extended like everybody else is doing.
This, by the way, just has the elbow out. He has I mean, I don't like I don't want you to fucking bash his brains in and, you know, ruin his life. But, like, I can make fun of him for that. Right.
Cause you can't. And he clearly acknowledges it's.
Yeah, he's my bad. Oh yeah. I forgot. Yeah. This guy right here like to put your fucking arm down just like. Oh yeah.
Looks like I'm saying Hitler doesn't it. When he does it again. Like OK doing.
Yeah. Just a commonsensical thing and people get really crazy on this kind of stuff.
And somebody brought up, they were like that's the way we used to do the Pledge of Allegiance. That was there's so many people, they got mad that people were making fun of this guy and highlighting this, that, like you heard all the different spins on it. Somebody was like, that was the standard way to do this Pledge of Allegiance.
Like this wasn't during the Pledge of Allegiance. Yeah. What are you talking about?
So apparently before it was hand over heart, it was arm extended like that. I'm like, yeah, but this has nothing to do was like this. I wonder when that changed.
I don't know.
Man In the thirties the pledge was like this. No, the pledge was arm extended.
All like to see how the flag that. Yes. Now Google that. Yeah. Yeah. That's what they said though.
That was the old way to to see Kyle the American flag. Well you weren't xg hireling. That was just apparently how it was done. Oh how funny. Yeah. The Bellamy salute. Can you, can you, can you look up at me. Salute. That's what it's called, and then images or something. Yeah, go, go. There you go. Oh, God, we did. Yes, yes. Towards the American flag right there.
Oh, and that's before.
Right. But somebody brought that up was like this wasn't during the national anthem.
And he wasn't like, I'm really married to the old 20th, early 20th century way of saluting the flag.
It's like it's not what's happening. Yeah, but it is peculiar, right? Yeah.
It's pretty funny, though. Yeah. Always funny. Yeah. I salute the flag however you want.
That's the only thing I really wanted to make clear. It's your flag. Do whatever you want.
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So. Oh, but speaking of our friend, our mousepad friend.
You say he's for sure a Jewish man, but I bring to you this evidence immaculate memory, your praises. We sing you rain. How in Splendor Was Jesus our king.
Thanks. Oh, hey, Harvey. Oh, I'm sorry. That is a Catholic man.
And Heaven, the blessed your glory proclaimed on earth. We, your children invoke your sweet name. Yeah.
Oh they are. They really are.
Yummy pussy. Yeah. Yeah. 100 percent cold. Sure.
Well he definitely needs to change the batteries in his smoke detector. Is one of the things that moves you up on the women's playlist is when you don't change the batteries in your smoke detector.
I tell you, all I have to hear is to chirps and I'm changing the battery like doesn't even if I don't touch anyone sits through foreign policy chirp, chirp, chirp.
Oh, we've gotten up at four in the morning saying about change it right away. Yeah, it's pretty great. No way. No way. Jose no thanks. Tom Hanks. That's the new one. Is that a new one? Instead of saying no way, Jose, you can say no thanks. Tom Hanks. Who when did that start? Ticktock on take up my stories. No thanks.
Tom Hanks. Instead of saying no way, Jose, you say no thanks. Tom Hanks. OK, this is our lyrics to a song. No, no. OK. It was on my story speed, OK, yeah. Tom Hanks. So what do you make of this proud Jewish man converting to Catholicism that's going on? And how soon will you do it? I think he's just very learned.
You know, he's trying to cover the bases. I mean, we all know that by blood, he is still fucking Jewish kosher.
And it's you know, it's wild because I know, like, from my perspective, I've never heard these songs before. I don't know how to spell Santa Claus like this guy is putting himself out there and learn. Yeah. So he's he's polytheistic.
He's learned. That's true. Maybe he's trying to get.
Well, hats off to you, sir, because you are big on, you know, learning a lot, knowing a lot of people.
You have your mousepads, you have your Jewish faith, and now you just you look like you made the full leap into Catholic gear and songs learning to sing, which is a good thing to expand your interests.
That's true. That is very true. I'm very proud of you, sir.
Come on, Mark, don't be stingy. You're ready for it up there. So in love with them, there's an update. Oh, God.
If you watch the live show, you, of course, got to see him pull the skin back on his dick and and have see Mark.
Fuck him. But this is something that we can show you. That's another update.
You don't have to be just wanting. I want real bad to make sure. Oh, Jesus.
Oh, oh, yeah, I'd love to be in your arms lying either under you or on top of you. Yeah. Or just standing there holding each other. I don't care where to start.
It is a nice way. Oh. Oh, no, thank you. Yes.
Yes, I can see the bottom part yet. No you don't have to walk back. There you go. Oh I can see it. But now I have to move mine.
Yeah. Huh. Oh no. You can see that. Yeah. Yeah, no, I want to get you to I think we each have a good mouthful and we have some good fun.
That's right. You you're not you're not hard on the eyes.
And I like your personality. Yeah. Let me put it this way. You're not coarse or gruff, but you're not Pinza either. You're just right. Just just the kind of man I want. Nice. Yeah. Especially now for me.
I thought mine was going to be easier at this time, but. Oh no, I remember my grandmother whenever something like this happens is when I was growing up, when I was growing up and I had plans and then they changed with no for no cause that I caused, you know, and I'd complain about my grandma used to tell me, well, son, she'd say, man proposes and God disposes. So don't worry about it. He knows what he's doing.
Tom Yeah. OK, Grandma, I won't I won't worry about it.
Is is he masturbating and telling a story about his gammy. Yeah. At the same time. Well, yeah. I mean his grandma has nothing to do with why he's masturbating. His grandma is really to share the story about how things can happen for any reason and change, you know.
Oh, it's a it's a story of change. Yeah. Yeah. Hearable or what it's like. That's what my mom used to say. You prepare for a guy with a little dick, he's got big ticket that, you know, that kind of thing.
Yeah, they're there. But like I say, I'm built in such a way that yeah, they hang very far back. They don't, they don't they don't hang down.
They just they're just back and very, very close to the to the top.
They're not back. God, it doesn't matter how warm it gets.
I think sweating like a like a black man and oh they don't want what Asner is a racist.
What. I didn't know that black people sweat more than everyone else. You know, the no. Sweating like a like a black man.
That's what I had. No, I just like there's no other there's weight on there's no additional thing to the metaphor. Just sweating like a black man. Yeah. It's like sweating like a black man in you. Right. Reiber or whatever. Outside in the.
Yeah. No, it's just a you know how blacks are always sweating. Yeah.
There's usually a second part of that. Sure. Yeah. Just in general. Just like all. Yeah. All the black guys.
Black man in a warehouse or something.
Right. Right. There's nothing that he's doing. Black man holding sand.
Right. Yeah. Right. Yeah.
There's always something. But let me just bring the camera to me. There you go. I don't think that would satisfy, satisfy that nice mouth of yours. Oh my God.
I know yours will be taste good. Oh I love the feeling.
Feeling like a meal now as it is there. That's, that's my whole that's where it spits. Oh well I'll have to check that later.
But I can see I've never, never noticed it. I clean myself. Oh. Just something on the hole. No I'm.
I'll check it. I'll check it. Yeah. Well I can't, I can't do the camera and yeah. I'm holding the camera. Let me see, let me, let me see it, let me see if I can see here. So I didn't look down enough.
I'd like to hear Mark's voice. It's not going to get hard till I'm ready to come. I'll tell you that.
You know, when I I have what I've got an appreciation for Ed's use of language, he really has a flowery, descriptive style of communication.
Well, you're really going to like this next. Oh, boy.
Thank you for making already feel that warm, Miles. And it's been a long time.
Oh, I'm trying I'm trying to imagine you sucking on it. I don't like the feeling. Ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow. I have lunch after this. I don't think I can. I'm going to fucking vomit. This is so gross. How many therapy after this? He's just. Come on. Right. Right. How long is this gonna take? All right. I want to die.
Oh. Oh, my God. Will you call me, please?
I will die.
This is so horrible. It's been a long time. Oh, my back hurts. Oh, my God. Oh, I'm all wet now.
Sweaty black. I have to go take a shower anyway.
OK, I'll do the same. That's it.
That's the end of the thing. All right guys. Guy, go shower.
Now my on. Don't be stingy. Yeah, I've got that's how we suck like a black man.
He just signs off with Mark like he's really one of those guys that he dumps and he runs away. Yeah.
That's how guy that that was so fantastic. That is that has made me almost forget about how much I hate you today.
I thought you were over a. Don't be pleased with yourself and the dog that's happy. What do you mean he brought you a good clip and no, no, Dobbs pleased with himself that he's pretty great.
More of a oh oh oh oh. It's a little bit hard till I'm ready to come. I'm going.
Don't we have any clips of dad, somebody's grandfather, dads and trains or something? I mean, oh my God, is there anything more innocent? We can remember that episode where we tried to be clean for 20 whole minute. Yeah, that was boring. Everyone hated something about. Yeah, that's my hope.
That's where it spits. Oh, my God.
Imagine having to go down on that. No. Yeah, I think. No. I just don't like how this descriptive he be towards me, I'd be like, OK, you come look like that, OK, you come.
Your turn. Mark, you come now. What if he said it? Show me show me that mouth. Come, come, come.
OK, just, you know, that commercial that you've got a real colorful beard. Tom, I want to see that come rubbed into your beard. Oh, fuck.
All right, Tom, it's not going to get hard till I'm ready to come. God, what a nightmare.
He is the best. He is the best.
I fucking hope there's more videos hidden somewhere that we discover over time. Really just such a wonderful man, that orgasm was something that was a ago and he thought he certainly was going to die during like, oh, really struggling.
I know, but if he has a heart attack, he's not in good shape. Yeah, he could.
Yeah. Yeah, well, it's true.
It's true. Big Hussian, I know you've got to take care of yourself for a number of reasons.
One of them is that you could, you could die while coming, you know, if you don't take care of yourself. That's absolutely true. Yeah. Yeah, yeah. Have a heart attack is uh.
Well well at least he was having fun with Mark. Yeah. He and Mark had a good time together.
Do you think it's always with Mark or there's different guys on the other end.
Um. I think he's a lot of us with just with Mark. I really do. Um, well, I know one thing.
He better he is going to come on, you know, you better come see you're good and bad. Tony, Tony, Tony, John.
Let's let live in the mood. So Tony Jones yet to switch switch speeds here, has weighed in on a lot of things.
You know, don't do it as bad as drink and drive. And then why do you why they were so, you know, he's got a lot of opinions.
He doesn't always follow his own advice. But, yeah, I love Tony.
You know, I haven't I've thought about Tony a lot in this regard, but I haven't actually had the information from him.
I've been wondering these last few months, what are his thoughts on covid-19, on inquiries? And luckily today we're like, hey, got an update.
Oh, fantastic. Tony's weighing in. Did he release an official statement? I think him and Foushee coordinated this together.
So it's this is actually actual National Health Institute in conjunction with Dr. Tony Jones. Oh, wow. So let's hear what was going on, everybody.
You know, I just want to let everybody know, you know, all this Colbie, you know, 19 virus is getting, you know, pretty dangerous.
Yeah, no, I personally super, super spooked out about this covid-19.
You know, I you know, I you know, I feel bad, you know, because all you really got to do, you know, is shower and wash your hands, you know, and now a lot of people, they don't they don't do that. Yeah. So what I'm asking for people, you know, it's just to wash your hands, you know, shower, shouting, distance yourself. I'm I'm I'm on a self-contained right now.
Are not, you know, having any girls.
I'm not all I that's very thoughtful. I party with the girl last night. But what I'm saying is I'm going to self-contained myself starting now.
I've been in quarantine. I haven't slept well last night.
Well, to people, you know, if more people would self quarantine, you know, if more people would, you know, not go out, you know what they you know, can you know, they're making, you know, my spaghetti owns it.
Oh, by the way, Emily, you left your coat in my place about three weeks ago. I need you to come scoop up this cold. You just simply you just stay home.
But that is in your jacket. Yes, I am wearing a female jacket. Well, what I'm going to say, though, is, yeah, it's kind of cool if it's pretty good.
Anyways, what I'm going to say, though, is seriously, this covid-19 serious to stop these. Wash your hands and shower, please.
Yeah, that's weird. Where's that Siri. Yeah. Just turned on. She's turned on by Tony Jones. That was so bizarre, but it was bizarre.
But I love Tony and thank you for taking this pandemic seriously and encouraging people not just to socially distance and wash their hands, but also to shower and to stay home unless you had a girl come through the night before, in which case you've got to start quarantining now.
And the other girl left her jacket at your house three weeks ago and then she came by.
Do you want to see what this, you know, champ just did? Or is there a super kind of the you know, you knows you're not, you know you know, if you know, you know, you know, you're not.
You know, you know, and all of it, you know. Nineteen year old, you know. You know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know you know you know you know you know you know.
I mean that might be a record that might be a record. Really good work really.
A lot of you know that's a lot of you know, a lot of you know, we've had a lot of people say, you know, I'm saying, you know, I mean, you know, nineteen virus, so ridiculous culvert, you know, nineteen virus.
And don't forget, you know, you need to, you know, shower and wash your hands.
You got a shower though, but you have to literally none of the medical bills make sure you shower.
No. You can get away with just washing. Yeah. The hands are a real big part. Your armpits, they don't really matter as much. I mean you should shower on your own.
Would you even trust Tony Jones quarantining? No. No way. Right. What do you think he's really doing? Because he he is out of jail and he's doing his community service.
I think he's done with that. I want to say he's probably done with that.
Yeah, but he's still trying to you know, he's a party guy. So I'm wondering if this has been really, really difficult for him.
And covid, you know, nineteen covid-19 has been the virus. Yeah. For a guy that part parties and stuff. This has got to be really tough on him, I mean, half the staff is that way, the party boys. Yes, sure. Yeah, I know. But for Tony Johns especially, that was his whole persona. And, you know, take it over, you know.
Well, you know, you know, you know, like the rest of us, this is a more subdued Tony Johns.
And why do you why, baby?
You know, 19 virus idiot Unkovic, you know, 19 virus.
You'll like this because you always like this kind of thing.
Sure. What you're doing, you fucking can't just take a shot in my garden. You freak out here. You come anywhere near me.
I'm sorry. Get off here. Here. Look at the state. You just clean up over here, stick a shirt.
My guy that you think, oh, here. Australia, that got it. Yeah. That's fucking acceptable. Oh my God.
Yeah. What do you do though. It's a what do you do when you got to shit like that. You shit in this person's garden. You do, right? Yeah, because if it's an emergency, I mean, this has got to be emergency shit, right?
And especially during covid, it's not like public restrooms are open as it is right now.
So fucking ridiculous. You walk around anywhere you like, I got to pee and they're like, not here. Yeah, well, that's the problem is that your bowels needs are still consistent, but you don't have those safehaven toilets to go to.
And there's so many places, too, that don't just don't let you pee anyways. I know.
So you've been like during regular time, you can walk into a store like I got there, like, oh, there's no bathroom here.
We're like, I'm a human being. I know citizen. I would like to I have to go to the bathroom like I did not here.
Well, and, you know, they're lying to you because employees because they go the best, not for the public.
Well, if they if a place says that that sells things, though, you got to be like, oh, I'm not going to buy anything from, you know, fuck you.
I'll tell you the best thing ever was when I was shopping for maternity clothes once and there was a restroom that they purposely had for pregnant lady so that you could pee as you were shopping, which was really small. Yeah, that's fair. They should have that everywhere. They should, you know, just eat and drink to shit right away.
Everyone's going to go to the bathroom and I can promise, but I do like that this guy laughed at this versus like. Yeah, anything really upset trying to hurt him or something kind of like obviously the guy had to shit.
Nobody wants to share.
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I miss that city of Fremont. You guys maybe don't remember him.
How can I forget. Oh I'm looking for a white lady. It's tend and dominate and be willing to put me in a dress. Yeah. Beat the shit out of me. Call me from this Fremont Street.
Yeah, I remember him, he's so sweet and free Gemini's again, you stupid white bitch. That's what I'm looking for, is a stupid tattoo like bitch that put me in a dress and beat the shit out of me. Call me.
You got a tattoo? I got one tattoo.
I'm white like slut again. He does that thing where he kind of he leads with I want to be submissive and then he is insulting. It's like a switch going on. It's confusing. I'm very confused.
I'm not sure what he wants. Yeah, but you're interested either way. I'm not sure what he wants, but I like that he puts me off kilter like that emotionally. Yeah. That's the allure of the Sissy Freeman. You know, it's going to go. Yeah, but he wants you, he wants me to put him in the dress and insult him. Right. He wants a pretty white tattooed bitch, put him in a dress, insult him, degrade him, probably whip him and call him names.
But at the same time, he's calling this presumed dominant person. He's insulting her.
Yeah, that's I don't think you're supposed to. Ah, you're supposed to insult your dog. I don't think so. Yeah, I thought that was the whole point is that you're submissive, so I don't I'm confused. Yeah. So let's see what the update is. You know what I'm saying.
You were against you against. But I do a dance for you. De de de de de de de de de de de de boon to do the things that you do to speak. Yeah. Come on. Give me a hand job to. That this I don't think this is good. What do you mean? I don't I don't it's not good.
It's great. I don't like it. This is a fantastic video that's definitely made me jump inside.
That made you feel bad? Yeah. Not the fucking. That's my people. That's where the spirit comes out of Mark. No, that doesn't freak you out.
This does. This does. Yes.
Well, then I have vastly to say would make me like if you walk down a hallway in a hotel and this was in the hallway, I could feel like my adrenaline surge and my fight or flight thing go through the roof.
Oh, no, I think this is fun. This guy is harmless. What? Yeah. Come on, Mark seems to me. So who here is here scarier?
I'll tell you why. Come on, Mark is scarier. No way. Ed Asner.
Because he can pass for normal. Ed Asner can sell you an insurance policy and then has this dungeon side to him, the city of Fremont.
And he can't cover like he's the city of Fremont all the time because he's crazy.
Woo, woo, woo. To you. To my mother mother fuckers. And you talked to my mother fuckers. Let's get tough on you scum sucking ducks, motherfuckers. I like it.
He changed his hair. Yeah, he did. The hair is not the same.
Hey, come on. Give me a hand job, too. Mm hmm. Who would you rather actually be with? This is this man. Jesus, no hesitation. Really? Yeah, well, for one thing, this guy likes girls and he likes it. You got to take that out of there to pretend that I'm Mark like I'm a guy.
No, just pretend you're you and that that Edds thing is just, you know, just take the male out of it. Right. Like he likes checking the electrics.
I think I'm I'm I'm I'm more comfortable with one hundred percent crazy. Like, at least I know, like, this guy is just he's on another planet.
This is how I know you have poor judgment that Asner can pass for normal and therefore is more scary to me because he's weirdo behind closed telling you.
I know not to let you make decisions. Seriously. Yeah, yeah, yeah. What do you want. Come on. Who would I rather be with.
Yeah. The sincere Fremont or Ed Asner. Yeah. Ed Asner. Yeah. He's respectful. Yeah.
He like I give him direction on like hey you imagine what's going on behind this guy's what's behind his door. Like the kind of shit that's in Cissy's.
Yeah. Literal skeletons. Skeletons in his apartment.
Peaceful. I think Ed Asner would lure you in with the with pretending to be normal and then he would stab you fifty times and bury you.
No, no. Ed Asner really carping. No, no. He's nicer than your grandpa, you know. Yeah. He's like but then he makes you jerk off in front of us so he doesn't make you you guys both agree on it. That's where it spits.
Ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow. John, if you're going to play guys coming, at least to our PC for me oh yeah.
Yeah. Oh, I like I like it. Oh, come on. I like a catch phrase if you're going to do it.
The problem with that is he doesn't have a good catchphrase. Who's that? It is or doesn't say anything when he counts. He says beautiful things here. He just he just goes, I'm going to come, Mark, I'm going to come. Oh, he doesn't have, like, a phrase like it or especially now for me, I thought mine was going to be easier at this time.
But I remember my grandmother whenever something like this happened.
Yeah, there. There.
But like I said down, I'm built in such a way that they hang very far back now as it is there.
This is way more normal. That's my whole that's where it spits.
Well, I'll have to check that later, but I can't see I can already feel that arm myself. And it's been a long time.
I just don't want to hear on this matter. I'm trying I'm trying to imagine like it. What is that like. Oh, I got a feeling of. Oh yeah. It's just. It's just. But here's the thing.
The city of Fremont is so whacked that you may not even have to do all the city of Fremont could be dropped into seven and just like be any of the like the serial killer, because I have.
All right. Let's ask Chris. Chris is a balanced person, OK? You're the normal list of all of us. Most normal. Who do you choose?
Yeah, Ed Asner. And I think it's an Academy Award, one or two, so. Oh, by the way, do you have a, uh, a debate about which of these like is it a real hard choice? No.
Like what is your your normal brain tell you is to stay away from.
I mean, this is friend of mine. Yeah, terrifying, just terrifying. I mean, I'm serious. It really makes me question I don't think he's that terrifying, maybe because I'm used to crazy.
I mean, I just think Ed Asner is creepier because he his dance and I a very nice dance. He sings and he makes up. So I like to sing and dance to.
Does that and does that make me nutty and. All right. I don't know, I just I, I like a good song and dance. I'm playful.
I guess I'm more playful. Yeah. Yeah. I don't like this. I don't like it. He sounds like he's fighting himself and I was like fighting and dying. Right. Yeah.
Oh Jesus Christ. I'm a throw up. I feel ill. I need to lie down. So I really got to work for him. I know times you really got to go over.
Is it hard for you like this to me? I mean, there's days where you're like, oh really?
No, it's not usually this difficult. Sounds like a long time, you know, hard time of it.
Yeah. Yeah. But then after he's like, I'm so sweaty I got to go to work and he just hangs up sweaty like a black.
So bizarre. Yeah. I don't know. Thank God you don't sound like that when we do it, make sweet marital love sweating like a like a black man. That's so silly. That's my whole.
That's my whole. That's where I spit out. What does he say? That's where. That's where spits.
That's where it spits.
Uh, yeah. No, no. I don't like any of them, but I choose the sissy of Fremont. Uh, I don't. Here's the deal. The city of Fremont won't he won't come like I don't think that he'll actually do anything sexual. I don't think he's gay.
I think you saw out of his mind that he's just going to sing and dance with literally terrifying.
He might cry or something. And the terrifying.
OK, you know, you might do well with a man, white folks in Memphis. White folks. Yeah.
What's the reason why your late wife is black? I don't know how long.
I like. What do you mean you push it to the White House later? You like you know, like I want to it big. Yeah, that's a hundred percent me.
If I absolutely was a white guy.
That's a white guy. Yeah. You don't think he has some Flav's in him. Oh, he's got flavor in them but he's a white guy. Yeah. That's why they call them white folks. Oh right. Yeah. I mean are you listening to the people.
I don't understand how the black chicks do it. They just wiggle their hips around. Are you saying they throw it back on you like a white woman just lays this all right. And they're lateral. They're into it.
Yeah. Fucks you back.
Yeah, yeah, yeah. OK, I like this dude. Black piece. You should pull more of his stuff. I sent you that page. His, his, he really says some shit man.
Wasn't Mr. White folks in a pimp documentary.
Well that might be a different white folks. I don't know. I'm not sure who. Well I just want to make sure we're not cheating the actual Mr. White. But this is this is legit, Mr. White. Yeah. Yeah. He like when a black eye. I like this. He really, really. I think you really like him. Oh yeah. He's great. I love this guy.
I love it. I heard you were looking for me. It was time for me. I'm sorry.
I wasn't sure we get to do it. Well, you've been curating so much and we've been on the show.
We've been on death row with, uh, we don't know what's happening with the the tick tock and the U.S. government. Right. Who knows? He's now saying that, like, you have to sell tech talk by a certain date or we're going to ban. I don't know. There's all kinds of stuff. So you've been really heavy into your talks.
That's right. Tom, how are you preparing?
All the time I've been doing your work. When do you hear me curious?
I always hear I'm like, oh, is that someone's getting stabbed? And what does that mean?
It's like, oh, no, Christine is going through what I like to do when I'm on the toilet. I like to carry it whenever I can. A few minutes here.
Yeah, well, walk us through some of these hits. Yeah, I'd love to. Yes. Yes, very few. Guess what. Well, guess what. And because my son's having fun in the pool. Yes, we are. And how does it end like that? Yeah, it's just nice to see that no matter as a mother, you're always going to embarrass your your son's little pool. Oh, I gotcha. And I like that.
And I like that guys like as we are like, OK, being lame. Listen to me really clearly.
If you don't like this flag, you pack up your bags and get out of my country. This flag is nothing but a flag of heritage. Think about all that is a beautiful flag.
I do think that you have a new possible spokesman for the the campaign to keep the Confederacy going strong.
That guy is put together. He is elegant and eloquent.
That's right. You know, he definitely has me thinking right now.
He's you know what he. Right. He's thought provoking. And look, we can't just cancel things without having a proper debate.
I think I think everything deserves because I was one of the people that was about to pack my bags and leave the country. But now I'm back. Good point, sir.
Yeah. When you come partying with Rukia, better be ready because the guys down. That guy's down. That girl down. This is already dog show away.
Oh. What kind of partying or what kind of partying when you party with what you're doing.
Yeah. When you come partying with Rukia better with Rukia Rooked I think is his name.
OK, but he's like when I inject you Beretti is you're probably going to pass out. Yeah. When I put bleach in your veins you're going to overdose and die.
So these three people in a coma, they weren't ready. Got it.
I mean, you know, hey, what's happening? Yeah, I'm freaking loaded again, as usual. This is not Monday. It's Wednesday. I'm gay. Have a good one, but a really good luck, right?
That's a good one. Yeah. Yeah. I think a lot of people are getting loaded on the talk right now.
There seems to be a sense of the people are really at a loss with what to do with themselves. The country is just in chaos. So, uh, a lot a lot of people getting ripped on the talk.
A lot of people got parts of America right now. Very impressive this Wednesday. So happy Humpday for you. Hey, what's happening? Yeah, I'm freaking loaded again. It's cool to cool to leave a digital footprint.
What's she up to? Oh, she's loaded again at me. Loaded somebody's grandma, probably.
Right. She's a grandmother. Something somebody related to that person. She's really, really interesting. I like her.
A lot of people hear about transition to five days and they assume it's going to place a new planet. And that's not the case. It's a different frequency in the sense that just the way that radio stations operate, different channels, all are going on at the same time, you just tune into the one or two the other. So how do you know if you're still stuck in this 3D matrix is whether or not you identify with these constructs, you stuff right or wrong?
Left, right, Republican, Democrat. Because the truth of the matter is that everything is true. So whether or not it's true in your reality, your frequency, whether it exists in your world doesn't mean that it's not true or not happening to somebody else who's operating at a higher OK.
I suppose as long as I could do it. But, Tom, are you stuck at you? Sounds like you're stuck in 3-D. Yeah. Yeah, I'm not in five days. You're your binaries. You're true. I am.
I am kind of amazed at someone's capacity to spew nonsense. You know, like somebody can cook up bullshit like that and just keep it coming. And you're like, wow.
I mean, this is like why people people like this should all be in sales, you know, because, like, I don't know.
And then they start, you know, just here's my credit card.
Yeah. This bitch will sell you the upgrade. Anything on the phone, the computer, anything like, oh, I just fucking tattoo my throat, just do it.
Whatever you like to throw tattoos are so aggressive. Yeah. You know, it's so like holy shit. But like she also like it's kind of it's I don't know, she's kind of hot. Right. She's super. I think she's gorgeous. Yeah. The throw you just imagine how painful that was.
It looks like it's painful. Yeah. It looks cool but it's also actually like it's a problem, you know, like, like I'm like it looks really like what I want to tell her is like that looks cool.
And also you shouldn't have done that.
Like that's kind of what it feels like I should say. Right. Like that. It just looks like it hurt it. It just looks like it hurt the most. It has to. Right. It has to hurt the most.
Well, it's such a declaration of like of notice me and say something. The idea that you would do this and not want someone to address it, like if you're like, oh, people keep talking about my throat tattoo. Well, yeah, you did that.
But there are people that would argue like, oh, but I'm doing this for me. Yeah. Not for the attention.
You want no one to address your throat tattoo, OK? I mean, because it is like having a permanent turtleneck on. It's very involved. And so it really I would say of all the tats. Yeah.
I mean, OK, the face tattoo is like the most aggro, but a throat face that too is I don't feel like joining the workforce through tattoo.
Oh it's it's a lot, it's like a hot chick thing. A lot of hot chicks do. They do. Yeah I know, but it looks cool as fuck. Look, look, look at her. It looks dope. I love it. You know what I like a chest I think on the the chest plates dope, a throat tattoo.
It looks cool. I love the job. Storper hot chicks. I'm like, cool. These are cool dude. I know.
Now it's cool. Look at her. She looks dope. Yeah. Yeah.
It's just so it does feel like a lot of them maybe want to feel like it'd be nice to be able to take this off. You think so. I mean it feels like it's great for certain settings. Yeah.
But on certain settings you'd be like oh this fucking throat tattoo is a lot like know.
I think that's always been my reluctance to get more.
Also, there's a difference between, oh, there's a cock and wings on that. My God, that's not good.
The diktats is all the difference between doing just your throat and having the whole upper body done, because this kind of looks cool when it's a whole piece.
Yeah, just this makes people go like fuck man doing. Yeah. To add on to that shit, you either lose it or add. Right.
Know, I mean the thing is to like I can't even commit to a hairstyle that I would want the rest of my life right. I keep in this shit. This is not go anywhere. Yeah. Oh yeah.
But are you stuck in three days. I think you are. I don't think you're a five D person yet Tom.
Well this kind of reminds me to bring up. No, uh, you remember our homeboy. Uh, look at him. Look how young that's when he was on drugs. Wait a minute. Wait a minute. Is that a Photoshop? Are you talk are you messing with me? What are you talking about? I mean, that he's a little boy now you're fucking with me. No, that's the guy. Yeah, but he looks like he's 12 here when he got those when he was younger and he was on a lot of drugs, bro.
He looks like he's a baby.
So we're looking at the Juggalo that we have showed you a number of times who since has reformed his life and is a Christian and sober. And he's very much a Trump defender. I don't know how that relates to this, but he talks about it a lot anyway. He's been having his tattoo removal done.
Oh, wow, he was so young, you did that poor guy. Here's the cool side by side.
Wow. So he really waited a minute. Yeah.
To get those tattoos. Well, he didn't really give a fuck about life on the left, you know, and like what might happen. And now he does.
Yeah. But it took him quite a while to come to that. Yeah. She's pretty wild.
Shows you too. That takes a lot of sessions to get that off. If you do if you do permanent clown tattoo on your face, you might not want it later.
Yeah, maybe this is the dirtiest man in the world, amortizes in his 80s and he hasn't paid for over 60 years. He leads a nomadic lifestyle on Enron and his finger food is rotten porcupine. And he smokes animal feces out of a pipe. He believes that cleanliness will bring him sickness. And he says the thought of taking a bath after all this time makes him angry.
Well, yeah, because it's a huge time waster. I understand. Yeah. Taking baths for that same reason. That's why I never towel dried myself off completely for a long, long time because it's such a time waster.
More than a third tested positive for alcohol. Almost one in 10 had cocaine in their system of cocaine.
Yeah, that was all of cocaine in this poor guy's, like, just trying to fucking do my job.
I just want to be a reporter. I want to be a respected reporter. I got this guy screaming.
I love crying.
More than a third tested positive for alcohol. Almost one in 10 had cocaine in their system of cocaine.
Oh. Oh, punk. I love it.
I love that. That was great. You're not mad at me anymore. I forgive you. Send her your hate. But I feel like, oh, love me. Love me again. Hold my hand in the try osbey hoodie.
So the the man brought a leaf blower inside and started fucking pulling it like his grandmother.
Jesus. That's because I could see you doing that to your sister. Yeah, and my mother, yeah. And then my dad.
Tommy, could you get the leaf blower out? What are you doing?
Like your dad would just be trying to spray down everybody in the House, leaders in here? Yeah.
Your dad would be so calm. Tommy, what are you doing, buddy? You brought a leaf blower in the house.
Oh, Jesus. Uh, uh. Uh uh, what do you mean, he's sexy? Oh, uh. Oh, yeah, like, oh, God. That was that was hard to say. I would rather watch the city of Fremont. OK, would you rather do Ed Asner or the KISS's guy?
Oh, Ed Asner. Stop. What are you talking about? I think this guy's a fucking creep. What's going on with his head?
He has that gel down or is that tattoo? No, it's a head tattoo. Tom, I wish you'd be a little more respectful. Is it really? Yeah. Yes. Other videos. And that's a head tattoo. Yeah.
Um, is, uh, for what country is he in? This is American guy. This has real foreign vibes to me. You know, I mean, he does have a guy we like new here. You like that.
Do you ladies like when a man give you Nick in your ear?
Oh, uh, so how long have you known this would feel good? His chin. Let me love you.
That's where it spits.
What about his eyeglasses? There's still the label. He kept the sticker that they don't fit his face. They're oversight. They're way too big for his face. And he's got the pencil thin blue pencil beard, no mustache. Everything is a disaster. I mean, this is like stepping into a horror show.
I know. That's why it's one of my favorite topics of the week. I've been sending this to all my friends.
I'd be with Ed Asner first. Then this guy, see if really I have a different lineup, I go KISS's guy CESI and then add what?
Yeah, you would be with this. Yeah, because I don't like I think I think the language thing with Ed, his constant talking to me would freak me out. I don't like the talking to Jesus Christ.
I don't like the way he talks. The head thing is so weird.
Look, you know, KISS's know about the live like is the beard tattooed or is that real?
No, I think it's real. Oh, you know, maybe it is. I do. You said this to people, will you send it to me? I sent it to Jamie Lynn, what?
She thanked me and she was like, I can't get past the label on his glasses. Like, I know it's so gross. I sent it to Jessica, which you say she loves it.
Yeah, they turned on hot. Yeah. Hot. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Oh. Oh, it's Assab or.
Where did you double it after what happened?
Well, I had the idea to double up. It would be really great. Oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh yeah. Like that turned on.
Now it's my baby Jesus, the multiple ones tonight. Oh, God.
It's a gross scum sucking ducks. Oh, we you against what you like, but that doesn't scare me.
I don't know what you. It's just it's just silly, like, he's just silly.
Hey, come on and give me a hand job, too. Yeah, it's fine. I give him a hand job, at least that way you're not having to suck his dick and say, oh, and you have to listen to Ed Asner ejaculate for hours. He's awesome.
Oh, anybody doesn't like that. Do they come to the cameras again.
Clubbish delayering of oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh.
Okay. Yeah. Jesus Christ. All right.
Um, that's it for my tax. That's it. Oh, I like the clothes on kisses and I. He writes kisses with a smiley face.
Oh, I guess this is the coolest guy episode, which is a very cool episode with a lot of cool stuff. That's true, so, so many cool guy. It's pretty great. OK, so we'll be back soon.
We'll be back next week, actually. But thank you guys for listening. Here's a song, a closing song called Let Me See That Come by Matthew D Christopher.
Thank you, Matthew.
Thank you guys for watching. Listening. We'll see you next week. In girl world, you can't call it a dick suck unless there's Jizan around and around and around and around. Sometimes I want to cover your eyes and it doesn't have to always going. This is always going a little bit more sophisticated, doesn't have to always go in, doesn't have to always go in, and always I've never comes to make it all of me. I feel so good because as I was.
Oh my fucking God, God, it's so fucking yummy. I wouldn't mind tasting it sometimes when you think it's hard to make noise, but my car is 100 percent kosher. Kosher because you're my comments kosher. I'm thinking that I would fucking. I don't want a vagina, I want a peanut butter, you're one I want I want what I want. I want another one. What, what, what? So how was your pee? We're back.
I pushed hard. Michael smelled a lot like coffee, so I'm going to have to hydrate. What one would you know what? You're supposed to push hard to get better massage a little hole and you can let me see. Let me see how much you. Let me let me see. I'll let you know that, you know. Give it to me, Martin. Yeah. Yeah. Oh I see all that. That's about me. Oh oh oh oh oh oh.
You like this. This is what gets you down for good. Oh, look at his fucking tits. Hey, man, I'm ready to jerk off you want to jump in a shot real quick? Oh. It's sort of, oh, OK, you go, you can let me see, let me see how much you love to see all that I needed right now identify as a nightmare and simply spell it out to me. Yes. Is pretty funny.
Who do write down by talking on the phone like that? Hi, Mommy, thanks, Jeanne. Thank you for watching this episode of your mom's house. And if you had a great time, watch more videos here, here, here. Don't forget to subscribe here, here, here, so that you will know when your mom's house video comes out immediately. Thanks, Jeanne.