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Good morning. Buy over eighteen queens like see the boobs hang and what's up there. I hope you're having a great time Wednesday or whatever day you're watching this. It is another episode of your mom's house podcast. A lot to get into. Incredible videos and clips, all kinds of stuff and a great guest coming. It's going to be a fun day, big day.

So many topics to cover. In fact, I have a secret topic that I haven't even discussed with you.

Oh, yeah. Oh, I'm excited to get into it.

Lots of personal revelations and personal development. Also, before we get going here, real quick to remind you that we were producing a new show called The Roach Motel with our very own Josh Potter. It comes out Tuesdays at 6:00 a.m. on our YouTube channel. Please rate review and subscribe to it on iTunes. Potter, as you know, is a beloved member of our policy here, and it's absolutely hilarious. He's he's really, really funny on it. Give it a try.

Like you said, the word incorrectly. It's a prescribe, prescribe and rate. Right. And also, don't forget our bevy of other shows here at Studio Jeans. We have two bears, one K, which guys will buy time this er sorry that's no live show anymore. That's in the past. That's in the past. There's where my mind's at. If you guys want to listen to mom stuff. And what else got Dr. Drew after Dr. Drew after Dark which we guest on.

Yeah. Lots of stuff going on in studio.

It's very cool. Why M.H. Live will return in November. We're going to announce that very soon. We'll give you the date and all the info about it, but it's going to be a Bangar.

There is an incredible guest already booked that I know it's going to make you finger yourself and just have such a good time just holding you and loving kissing you and just put a hickey on your thigh and you'll just remember it forever and make you feel like you're the only one like you just it, you're just it.

You know, Tom, there's so many things going on in the world today. But I would think the most important topic is how to pronounce. Megan or Megan, I believe it's Megan, as does the dog, and you're under the stupid impression that it's Megan.

Yeah, Megan is the way to say the name Megan is how stupid people say the name. Yeah, I disagree.

I think that Megan is for assholes and Megan is for nice girls. Megan's a dumb twat. Megan is a nice, cool, smart.

Megan is a piece of shit cunt face. And Megan know is a sweet girl I grew up going to school with.

Thank you very much, Megan the dummy. Megan's a barlas bag of the IV bag.

Everybody everybody could finish inside of it.

Yeah, I disagree, Tom.

First of all, Megan is not a horse named. It is. It is.

If you say it like the way it is. If you say skin is a horse. No, it's not. Megan is a nice girl who knows math.

And to be clear about some, you're a woman. You don't know shit to begin with, OK?

Because women are fucking they're all stupid.

Yeah. So let's not you don't know what you're talking about. I do know. I do know. I didn't.

Megan's right in and let us know if they prefer Megan or Megan.

I'm going to do an unofficial poll and I will find out on my Instagram stories.

OK, well go ahead. Megan's with respect and Megan's a pig with tits.

That's a Megan. That's Megan. All right. Whatever, man. Let's, um. Let's start the show.

I'm ready. Let's get into it. Inforum Juggalo says, Hey, Tom Seguro, invite me on the podcast so I can try it out with you. And Dr. Drew, four strokes with my brother is my favorite. Great. More riddles.

Oh, is Randy bringing this Doberman? Oh, welcome to your mom's house with Tom and Kristina. It's your. Now. Yep, yep, yep, yep, yep, yep, yep, yep. If you do have that. I didn't like where it was placed. Oh, yeah, that's what your dad does when you sit down.

Yeah, you just did that. And if you move his stuff, he's like my camera to you if he doesn't.

So I had a job there, fuckface. Yeah. God, it's it's so crazy that he's dead because I just feel like as much as we know, talking about Fed or panic, you know, it's just crazy that we talk about smoking, like every week.

It's like there's no way he's dead right now. We're in denial.

Well, I just know I think he's still I think he's using Muen.

I think he is. Is he is he is the two pack of what I am told. And I think we're going to see a hologram of him soon here.

You know, he might be our special guest in November. I don't know.

It might be, uh, thank God he left us with just a catalogue of work every week.

There's just and here's the thing. He had, as some meth users do, um, at 13 YouTube channels.

So you don't just get to go to one and be like, oh, I saw the videos. There's new discoveries, you know?

Oh, yeah, that's interesting because on the talk, I've noticed that that people have multiple talk accounts as well, because I get flagged and they come back so well that they get flagged.

They get flagged.

That wasn't that wasn't Ronald's thing.

It was, um, it was just that, you know, he he felt the need to separate all his properties.

You don't think it's that he just forgot that he had a YouTube account every time he or he couldn't remember his email address. So he would start new accounts? I don't think so, man.

I'm looking for that. Is that in here? Yeah, here it is. Horndog did that feather in he did the the Don't Be Stingy song. Everybody loved it. He did a Fed smoker song, uh, called Feather in it. That's really good. It's really good. Son of a bitch, son of a bitch. But listen here. He just lost your life and you get a job here. Talk face to face with your father in a.

How do you get a job here? Talk face to face to talk to Peterson. Donald Peterson got fired.

In which case, you know, you are your brain on fire.

You you know what? You're trying to see these wire maybe on your face.

You just ruined your life.

You listen here. You just lost your life. And you get a job here, fuckface. You get a job. You're scared to death just a little bit. Just feels good.

Where did I go when you want to that that's real motherfuckers.

I feel great.

I've never heard talk face to face up there. Listen here. He just lost your life. You got a job here.

Doctors, when you get a job skill.

Incredible. No, nobody to take it easy. Fuck and fuck.

What I didn't realize is how many catchphrases he so many catch phrases.

And also his voice was capable of changing pitch so dramatically.

All the different substances that. What's up there choma? And then yeah, that's how I roll my baby rapers.

Yeah. You see these wires baby rieper stay on your feet to get a job here fuckface.

Yeah. He's and he also was like a chameleon because he would look dramatically different in a lot of these.

Yeah. So yes that's what he was feathering it. He looked so different than when he was you know, when he was straight Hurk news in it out there.

It was really something. Men tattered their retard.

Yeah. Their retired but doggin killing it.

Man that's a great song. I know there's other songs and people because I've asked for a long time about where they can hear and listen to these songs. So I know that he's put Don't Be Stingy in this song on iTunes and some other great, great, uh, creators, musicians, artists, Bart Simpson and Grass Kingdoms are putting their songs on iTunes so you can search for them as artists and find the songs they created for the show, which I think fantastic deserve all the credit back to Shaggy and the creep.

So I guess people sent more why I made stuff to him because that was the opening clip there. And and he's trying to figure this out here, which is really funny. Oh, I see.

I see what he's doing. I see what he's doing here. It's like me saying that, hey, Terpsichore invite me on the podcast so I could try it out with you. And Dr. Drew, four strokes with my brother is my favorite.

Is that like he wants us to have a threesome and talking about the Different Strokes, Season four, we talk about fucking because remember, he's talking about Dr. Drew is like fucking bitches like crazy.

Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. So I could try it out with you and Dr. Drew. Like what? Like a fucking dude. Three way.

That's horrible. And then four strokes with them. So two pizzas at four total or like four strokes for each of us. Or do we each get two stroke.

And then I love his analysis. I know it is sharp. Mind you, actually the way he breaks up down is how a normal logical person.

But it's really smart. Yeah. And then the producer jumps in here.

Do you know what that means for you? Keep going. What does it mean? So this guy gets high on meth and he like his dick off and he says he is like the hardest thing he's he's ever had in his life. Stroke's. Oh, so now that's so straight.

And not knowing that I've been so straight, not knowing that might be my favorite thing.

That was really funny. Did Oh my gosh.

You know what's great is that a guy that looks like that is like I don't need to know that.

Yeah I know. Who's got makeup on. He's Oh I know that shit. Yeah. He's like I'm, I'm good. I was normal.

Yeah. You got to get me. I, I'm, I'm straight not knowing that that's so great.

Wow. Yeah that's fine.

I was on stroke's with them for strokes with them. I love to the. A rumor is now that just Dr. Drew Fuks indiscriminantly, that dude said he fucks a lot of bitches, not do is like. That's right.

It's like he's out there just plowing chicks left and right for stroke's with my brother is my favorite.

Dr. Drew is like, fuck bitches like crazy.

We are we are ruining his life. Oh, my God. We had Dr. Drew's life at this. We have to we have to get it to a point where, like that is a well-known thing.

Everybody just talks about how Dr. Drew just fucked bitch like Susan.

Don't pay us a visit. Excuse me. Why everybody's saying that Dr. Drew was like fucking bitches, like crazy fucking bitch.

Oh, my God. Me, it's the sweetest, most loyal husband.

Oh, yeah. He's he's he is a gem. Um, we were talking about because last night we were like, hey, we're going to watch. And we really realized that probably the worst part, the worst part of this pandemic, worse than the health crisis, the damage the economy, that's the illness is that there's no good news shows. Yeah, TV sucks right now.

TV sucks movies suck movies.

There's a couple in the vault that they keep. They, um, they had to delay again, the Bond release. So James Bond movie was going to come out. We shot last year. It was going to come out in April. And they tried to push it to, I think, November. Oh, and for this is like, you know, these are hundreds of millions of dollars in these movies. And then the marketing is another hundred and some million.

So now they're pushing it into April. Twenty twenty.

But yeah, well that's no do it now when they're home and desperate now because they want, they want that theater release.

That's why I know I got to tell you though is that I'm really upset about the lack of my reality shows.

Yeah. Forget these movies. Look, I understand it's hard to shoot the films, but I don't want to watch reality shows on Zoome. I don't want to see them, you know, when they do my kneecaps and stuff. Terrible. So we got into ninety fiancee the other way. Summit and Jenny are back.

Right, so I don't have any warm water in my house.

So that's been like one saving grace. But it's, you know, it's terrible. But like remember killing Eve. Yeah. I'm just cut off like, like you're like this is the end of the season. Yeah. And then it made sense that oh production must have halted because this didn't make sense the way the season ended at all. It's upsetting.

It's like, it's like we're all in reels of Instagram versus tick tock right now. It's just so fucking disappointing in the world right now.

Entertainment. Yeah. And I think it's a good time. Well, like I'm trying to my creations and I realise this fucking garbage right now and I'm having such a hard time. Tick tock. Yeah. Because it doesn't let you share any more of your stories automatically.

That sucks. The world is just collapsing around us. Yeah.

I'm just bummed out though that like no new production. So like you don't get a cool new show, although I will say that. Well Fargo is that, that's what I'm saying. But that was that was shot before. So like that was in the can. Ready to go. Yeah. So that's good. I watched an amazing French movie. It's like ten years old last night. Yeah.

I heard you. God, it's so good. Yeah. It's called a prophet.

OK, well and what's it about.

It is about this young Arab kid that gets goes to prison and he basically gets in with the Corsican gang there. It's really good. I mean, I can't do justice describing it, but it's a really phenomenal movie. All right. Really, really good. And by the way, there are subtitles.

And if you're one of these fucking dummies that, you know, goes like, well. Subtitles man, I don't do that.

OK, then just don't enjoy things, don't don't don't get to experience the I mean, it's the same type of person that you're like, hey, there's a five star sushi restaurant. Well, you got to use chopsticks. Yeah, that's right.

I figure it the fuck out. Mike, grow up. Welcome to the real adult world.

Sometimes you got to use chopsticks. Sometimes you got to read during a movie, you stupid piece of shit.

Well, I have to admit that sometimes I don't feel like reading because I'm too tired. I want to watch. OK, I don't like the dubbing over. I think that's what they were. That's the word I can't even learn to read.

That's what my first piece of advice we learn to fucking read and then maybe enjoy some foreign language film to look down. You ever hear these dumb fucks? They're like, you've got to look down to see the words.

Yeah.

And then I miss what's going on up there. You go look down and I'm sitting here, I'm reading, I missed the whole movie. You're so fucking stupid.

I mean, really, someone should bash your fucking head in here and you see how virile and pumped you are. Yeah. You did weightlifting this morning.

Yeah. And should we announce that you brought your first sperm sample in the post vasectomy? And it's very exciting because we're getting closer to bustan nuts.

I walked in, I go, I have my I have my sample. I was trying to be, you know, well, polite because it's such a weird thing, like you have to bring in your jizz.

And then I dropped off in my office with, like, everybody in the house.

Yeah. And I can hear, like, kids yelling. It was terrible. But I get that loadout. And how many people do you think jerk off in the parking lot of, like their doctor's office? Like, they're probably not supposed to and they're like, I'm just going to jerk it here. I don't know that that happens because I am I dumb brain.

I was like, it probably has to be really fresh. I was like, I wanted to do it right before I go in.

I was watching, uh, Dalt clip. What were you watching? It was like, uh frenulum uh compilation. Frenulum. Yeah. What's that. Is that right. What's that. Then they lick the it's a licking thing. Yeah.

Kind of. Yeah. That is that the right. Look what I'm asking here.

I know. Go back. That can't be right. Well, the thing it's the part of the mouth go back that part. You got the wrong thing. Maybe frenulum porn. There you go. I've never even heard of this, Tom. OK. Wow, how did you even see that it was it was just like. Let's see here, my love. What's the first one, what is this, wearing a mask? So, oh, yeah, is that kind of thing?

Yeah, yeah, and then they lickings. Yeah, like they're they're going like on the backside here.

I got you. Yeah.

OK, I think isn't that the frenulum is a friendly part of the penis. Right. It's not the part of the penis. Right back the under the head.

Yes. Yes it is. It is just put like yeah I remember that.

Ajiaco spelled differently. OK, OK, well, that's exciting. That's a new thing. So, like it was like they kind of like work that side of it and then and then the guy, Bogucz, I was like a compilation. So I was like, yeah, yeah, you're looking at the screen. And then I filled up a cup. Yeah. And then I took it in is the whole line. I'm sorry. I just have to know the details because I didn't see this.

Is it a discrete cup or is it just like a urine sample cup. So it's like a yearly cup.

So anybody could tell what you had in bag, but you give it put in the bag. They gave you a bag, so she gave me the bag. I put it in there and she goes, I go, OK, here it is. And she goes, Oh, you got to go see the doctor. And I go with the sample and she's like, Yeah. So I go into his office. I wait, I guess he's with a patient.

He comes in, he goes, You got something for me? And I go, Yeah, it's in the bag. So he reaches in, he pulls it out of the bag and he goes, Oh, it's a pretty healthy amount. And I go, yeah, hopefully there's no sperm in it. Right, because it's a seminal fluid uncomfort. Puts it in his mouth. I'm like, what? Oh, what? And he goes. Because there's no sperm in here.

Well, how he can do that on taste alone. I mean, that's why they go to school. That's why they get paid so much.

Yeah, because it's like a top tier urologist, obviously. Yeah. I mean, how do you think they train? So he's got a taste.

So many guys jizz all day and then be like there's like one or two in there, there's 50 or he'll be like there's millions of sperm in here.

Yeah he knows. But it's like a high level chef, you know. It is the Palaszczuk just knows. Ah, there's cinnamon in this, you know, like how do you fucking know. And they're like, I've been doing this a long time. Yeah.

Or like a Somalia. He's like a comes. Exactly. And he knows the different flavors.

So he goes come back in two weeks and he goes on that last one. You have to come right in my mouth like oh fresh into the oven. What.

And he goes, that's how I can tell. Yeah. I love it. I mean I got to like prepare for that I guess.

Wow. Yeah. Well that's exciting.

At least you get your results right away. Right away. And immediately I might come as well.

And he's going to be like you're clear and it just drips on his chin.

Yeah. That's really cool. Pretty exciting. Excited.

I can't wait for us to bust nuts recklessly because, you know, the only time we really done that is when we were trying to make children. So this is really now you get you don't have any doubt.

There's no like. Oh, because there's a few times where, like, we've done that and you're like, oh, it's all right.

You just don't know. Don't know.

Speaking of television, by the way, I wanted to die. I talked to my dad and he's like, I got it. I had another movie recommendation. So I tell him I go, I saw this movie that I know you'll like. And don't worry, it's in English. You don't have to read. So he's like, great. So I tell him, I go, it's like, go, do you have Amazon Prime? And he goes, Yeah.

And I go, great, you can watch it, there it goes. Oh, yeah, I'll have to wait till your mom gets back and I go for what you as well. I don't know how to how to do all that. And I go, it's right there. Just turn on your Apple TV and just go to that.

And he goes, Yeah, I don't know how to do that. And I go, no, like, you know, to do the Apple TV though. He goes, No, I go, What do you mean? Like, just you have been there.

You have the remote, it's just automatic. Just open it. And he goes, Tommy, I don't know how to get it all started. Log in. I go, you're automatically logged in like it's you stay logged in. You don't have to log in every time.

I'll just wait till she gets back. I'm like. Dude, how do you watch other things, but like he thinks that Charro is going to have any kind of solutions is absurd. It's so why is he waiting for her? She's not going to help.

I almost was like, you know what? Like, don't call me anymore. That's how upset I got about it.

I was like, why can't you just do this? And he was like, I don't like that reluctance to like to just try.

But it's been fucking 20 years, you know, like, you know, like I mean, I don't know how many years it was seven years ago, like when when my first special came as a nephew. How do I get that? Like you go to Netflix, Dotcom, and then for a year he was like, how do I see this thing?

I go, it's on Netflix. He's like, I don't know how to get it. I was like, oh, my God, it's so upsetting.

I mean, there's a there is a legit case to just wipe out all old people. And maybe that's an upside of coronavirus.

Absolutely. You know, I mean, we're sorry. We're sort of lose them all. Social Security crisis.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. I mean, they said that like a lot of deaths took place in nursing homes. Good. Yeah, I agree. It's fine.

I mean, I think we should pump it into nursing homes instead of oxygen.

Just put it in there and we wipe them out just so that they don't annoy us.

What they're exactly. You're so dumb now. Like fucking how do I send the message? Don't just fucking try to eat that phone and hopefully you'll choke on it.

Well, the thing is too is that your dad is not like a helpless old man. He knows how to send text messages. He knows how to do stuff.

He was like telling me he's not our word. I had to and he talked to the doctor and they requested me to upload something I don't upload. And I go, What did you do? He goes, I figure it out. I go.

So you did upload it. And he's like, Yeah. But then I called them and told them I didn't enjoy that.

I was like. You told them that you don't like uploading even though you did it, and he's like, exactly, he didn't enjoy it.

He's like, you know, who uploaded everybody all day?

Every day we upload everything.

He's like, yeah. And, you know, there's a program written by some 29 year old boy that's super young guy, you know.

Yeah, yeah.

I like dude, you just got to you have to accept that this is how it is life. And it's so much better with being able to upload stuff and not have to go in and do things in person. I remember the 90s. Yeah.

I was like, I'll tell you one thing I'm never going to do. He actually said, I'll never do this. I go, what? He goes email. Yeah. He goes, I'm never going to do that. And I was like, Oh, OK. Well, I was going to email you. He's like, well, don't I'll never ever.

He goes, they made me get an email account at work and he goes, but I refuse to open it. And I was like, All right man.

Yeah, but remember when email was new. Yeah, of course. And you were like, oh my God, I got a message for my friend.

I remember what I did because I remember being late to emailing. Like in the night, like when I had a friend and I go, I was how do I like I know he goes, what's your email going? Don't have because you don't have a fucking email account. This is the 90s.

I was like, now he had to walk me through it, you know, my teacher made us do it in college when I was super new.

Like homework assignments would only be released by email. And I was so mad.

I'm like, fuck, because back then you had to go into the computer room at at school. You didn't have a really computer in you in your dorm room.

I had a college email address that I had access, I don't know, maybe some Macs.

I met this ho on the streets of Madrid. Yeah. And I gave her that email. I didn't read it. I didn't get it until I went back to it. It's so upsetting. I could have hooked up with that slut. Was such a it was Megan. OK, Maggard.

Meghan, hey, do you remember texting when you had to do like one, two, three years ago? See, that was the first phone I had. It was a flip phone.

Ari Shapiro, we're texting. Oh, he still. Think so. He's a dipshit. A, b, b, b, b. Yeah.

So why does he stick to that? I love technology though. It's so fun. So it's been good. It's been inherited. Um so can I tell you what happened to me.

And I have not told a soul. Yeah. Not a single soul because I was so embarrassed that this happened. So I was eating breakfast downstairs in our house. Nobody was home except we had our cleaning lady and I'm getting ready to leave the house. I got my brand new kicks on my gold puma's. I'm feeling good about myself, kind of flies out of it. So I'm finished eating. I go to grab my purse. I walk. In the floor is wet because the cleaning lady had just mopped.

I fucking fell so hard, I slid my feet, went up in the air, and I landed flat on my back on our hard ass tile like ceramic tile floors.

What do we have? Marble floor, whatever. Wood, sorry, what floor? And the only thing that saved my head is that I was wearing a bun that day and my hair essentially broke the fall of my head so I would have cracked my head on.

And you know what's crazy is that I was like laying there and I was like, oh, God, please tell me what part of the floor where and the entire dining area.

Yeah, like, I was walking to the to get the keys. The car keys were stolen, valor happened. And I was laying right there by the railing and I was so embarrassed that the cleaning lady would see me because, you know, she always warns you like he's wet floored me. Christine, I'm like, shut the fuck up. I know it's a wet floor, but she didn't warn me this time. And I was so embarrassed that she would see me that I solecism I'm on my back flat.

I'm completely in shock. I fucking dog role or what does that one like military roll. I roll over immediately to like the carpet in every.

What is like all the military families, a secret, because I want to tell you on the show, because it's so so I do like a roll. I roll over to the carpeting and I get up so quick so that nobody in the house sees that I've fallen for nobody. And to this day, nobody knew, except right now I'm telling the world. But I was so embarrassed.

This is when I came in to tape where my mom's at and I was wearing a bun that day, like right before I came.

So how long ago was that? Well, two days ago. Three days. Oh, so this week.

This week. Last week. Yeah, and I can't and I was like in shock and I just got in the car and I was like, wow, I could have really just hurt myself. Yeah, I.

I really hurt my elbow.

I hate shit, I thought, but I said it like, I don't know, six months ago or something in the house wearing socks or I was wearing socks and underwear and doing like grab something and I was like no.

And I went to Chase went right up because I went like full force to chase after a fuck man and I just went up in the air and boom.

Yes, you let on your body, you tell. Yeah, yeah, yeah, and I was like, Oh. And he just kept running.

Yeah, yeah. See but I got lucky because my I broke my hand, broke my phone, my hair, my bun was so weird. I smushed my thumb, I pushed my elbow. What if you were like I could have really fucked myself.

I know. What if you're in the hospital right now. I know. I was like well, goes on.

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You need to live your most comfortable life, dude.

Speaking of. Yeah I, I, I have another thing of I followed another lady home.

So this is you telling me that like that's good news because he's like good news. This is pretty funny.

So remember the other night I was like I don't think I wanted to have stuff for breakfast the next day. And so I go to the grocery store and it's it's not late, but it's the evening.

Right. So I go in.

When is this I get a couple of things when you left the house and it's like it was like right around dinnertime. So this is like on I think Friday. So anyways, I'm there. I see a lady in the grocery store and I was like, I'm going to follow her home. Right. So I get in my car, I follow her home. But this time it's just pretty crazy. I go inside her house. Oh, my God.

All right.

So here's I hope the FBI is listening. This is this is awesome.

Listen to what I did. So I see her. I'm watching her. She lays out different clothes on her bed. And I see her, like, looking at the different clothes.

OK, so she she leaves she leaves them on the bed and she gets in the shower. I don't follow her in the shower. I stay in the bedroom. But here's what I do, I put two of the outfits away and I leave one and I put a note and I go wear this one and I put that on the bed. So now and I even got a pair of shoes out that I thought, look, go with it. Like these wedges.

I was like, I put them all. So I coordinated the choice for her and I left it. No, this said, wear this one. OK, so she doesn't have to like.

Hold on, let me. Yoanna, you know, I know the story is false. How no man likes a woman in wedges. There's no fucking way you put out wedges, which is a nice. What do you mean like a wedge shirt and.

Yeah, the wedge and a kitten heel are garbage. What are you talking about, like a wedge? Well, for this particular, it was the dress. It was a green dress. OK, so I thought they looked good with them.

I really don't think you should be sharing this out loud on the show. Why? It's just not a smart idea of what's going to happen. Really, you know, you need me to tell you why, tell me. Babe, you're stalking people now I'm dealing with a pandemic in my own way.

OK, well, this is what happens when I don't get to do stand up. This is but is it helping you? Do you feel better? Yeah, I feel way better. I got an adrenaline rush. Oh, well, that's that's all that is. That's fine. Then you kind of get a rush.

Yeah, I agree. Go ahead. Continue doing it then. OK, no problems.

So back to some why I made official news. I want to thank everybody.

We had the official fudge packer petition. Yeah.

That came around that said officially change the name of the Green Bay Packers to the Fudge Packers and the San Francisco 49ers to the San Francisco 49ers.

And good work, guys. Mommies, you were on that lickety split change, Doug.

I wish it was on change, Doug. And, you know, I posted it. We all posted it and it got some real traction. It took off like wildfire and it was taken down within hours. So but thank you guys for trying. Yeah. You know, sometimes people are not ready for real change. Yeah. Sometimes people need to process these things.

Yeah. Think of the civil rights movement. That's right. Tom took time.

It took time. So let's keep trying. Let's be persistent. This is just the first try. You guys. We're going to get there. We're going to get will prevail.

Black lives matter. Lives matter. Fudge packers. Two very important things from this year.

Um, this I haven't seen this, but just from the description on the folder. You want to see this?

Oh, yeah. Yeah, yeah. What do you mean out of a two? And they want going to some of these guys getting a shot in the Philippines, sounds like it. Yeah. Oh, they're fucking with him. Come on, don't look, bro. Get your shot.

Yeah, it's don't look back. Here we go.

See, it's funny to watch, it's funny, yeah, I mean, to be fair, this is a shot in the Philippines, which I would probably be reacting the same way. Why not America or Europe? You know, I mean, I wouldn't want a shot.

I wouldn't feel Philippine that no way. Wouldn't let them play hangnail. OK, it's America, Jack. And we trust America.

OK, this is another last night on fiancee before the 90 days, yeah, I read that this girl wants to have her baby in Ethiopia.

Yeah, yeah.

She's like six months pregnant and she's like, I'm going to go have the baby there. And then they're like, dude. And then the doctors, like the doctor, he's like, you're going to have you checked out the hospital there?

And they have a Mănescu unit and like, are they able to. And she's like, yeah, they don't always have the medicine.

He's like, right, right. They have to maybe stay here.

They have a rooster that comes and guesses the gender of the baby.

And then a witch doctor comes to check the guys.

I can say this. I've been oh, OK. I've been to that's a good one. He's like, I have a black friend that I can tell you.

I can tell you. I can tell.

Certainly you check out you you checked out all the the medical community's staff wouldn't dare.

I wouldn't even go there. I wouldn't even get a manicure. OK, ok. But hey, it's clear now you can you can press pause. So now America here's another Europe, another Western Europe, not even my party or another foreign clip right here. This is how foreign coaches take care of business. This is really something you don't see a lot in the States anymore.

You have to look at it.

I don't know where that is.

I love it. But I would love if one of our listeners could tell me what he said. Yeah, that was a real Durka Durka shit.

Yeah, well, uh, Turkey, Turkey, Turkey, Durka, Turkey, Derga, my line up.

Yeah. Haven't you been to Turkey. Did you go to Istanbul. No, never been heard. Istanbul is amazing. I heard you. Yeah.

My cousin's been there and I have a friend that went there. I said it was like one of the most amazing cities he's ever been to. Yeah, but there's a lot of hot chicks you can bang there, too.

What do you mean, a dirty chicks in leather bathing suits, maybe in Turkey? Mm hmm. Why do you like those dirty chicks in Turkey? I've never been to Turkey. Where do you meet your other girlfriend? Tunisia.

Tunisia. You got you're so you're so, like, obsessed with her, you always bring her up.

I was trying to think of other horse jealous. I love you. You're my no. I was thinking the other sluts. I love you. Try to think of other slut stories. You don't know.

You know what I like about you now? I like that scar you have from your hanging operation. Now you look like a badass. It's like sexy. It's a prison change. Yeah, I like that. Like now like there's something different on you. Yeah. I mean, I've been looking at you for 15 years naked and now there's something new there and now it's very sexy.

I like you know, I remember one time I bang this chick. I didn't know her name. Right. I was in New York. New York. You could just walk down the street just like you want to. That is not even true. It is true. You cannot because there's really good looking women in New York City like models everywhere. Yeah, there's all kinds of people. It's New York City. And so what kind of lady was this is a fucking was nighttime.

So it was a, you know, kind of a. Streetwalker. She was she was bandaged up. You had gauze wrapped around her actions and you like that? Yeah, she had the cast. Yeah, I'm not attractive.

No, no, I just was like. You'll do you know, you just threw your hot dog in there? Yep, yep, yeah, I told you about the one who new it was like it was a streak for a minute when I was like nineteen twenty, twenty one. Every time I would go there, just meet some random, have sex with them.

Talking about you never told me this stuff. I'm telling you right now I can't believe you. Why did you use condoms.

Let's see. Yes. Yes. No. Oh my God. Couple of yeses. No, no, babe. Mm hmm. I knew one of them, I knew one of them like I actually was like. Oh, I know your name as she got and here's the thing, I wore a condom with the person I did know and then I didn't with somebody that I didn't know.

OK. You are so gross. Mm hmm. Anyways, I wanted to share with you as well another piece of vital information. OK, I want to make a formal announcement. Oh, OK. It is come to my attention, I've done some scientific testing. Yeah, cream of Wheat does, in fact, give me diarrhea.

Oh, I very important. Well, here's what I did. I conducted an experiment where I ate nothing that morning. Nothing. I like just coffee. Normal, normal. I took my normal coffee shit after I made cream of wheat.

And I shit about an hour later, like violent water hose, diarrhea. So it is apparent and I don't react that way to foods, this is the one thing that's like a trigger food for what are we done with cream?

Wheat.

That's the thing is that I like it so much. There's going to power through it, deal with it like, you know how you do that with sushi and you're like, oh, this one's going to make me sick and you eat it.

And I think I may have to just eat it like that. You like it that much? I like it. It tastes like paste like glue from kindergarten, you know. Yeah. There's something so wonderful about it and comforting. Yeah. I may every now and then indulge and then just take the time to do it. Feels good you know like. This guy is he, uh, touch. He looks different, real watch, but he doesn't talk like he's touched.

Oh, my God, is so dangerous. Is a drill, earwax, earwax? I don't know, he said that part like a. Certain type of person was well and also the medical community, any doctors listening, I'm pretty sure that's a bad idea to put a drill and a cutup in your ear. Dangerous? No, you rupture your eardrum at the least. I don't think they would take that off.

I don't like to see his earwax. Really gross. OK. OK, do you remember? Not too long ago, this clip really got people talking and debating that 32 inches, you do anything you want, you little pussy you on, keep running the house.

I don't see where the fuck you are you serious?

So I give you a excuse to fucking cheat on me. I cheat addicts at 18.

That's right. Is addicts cheat, right? Dixon 18. That's right.

And I think the audience overwhelmingly agreed that it is not.

But, uh, we have a super fan that check this out tattoo by Kilroy Tattooer. He did this.

She got this. This is a lady. They got this on her dick sucks, ain't she? Well, how dope is that? That is amazing.

Dude, can you see, by the way, I would be like, oh, shit. If you're, like, hooking up with this girl, you see that you're like an animal.

It's pretty savage. And here you are, sir. I would love to see her. Yeah. Oh, she's like super pretty.

She's super pretty. Yeah. So you'd be like, that's real. And she got dicks like saying yes. And she's like going to get another tattoo.

But yeah, she's super pretty and she got this on her. That's why you'd be like Oh yeah, let me buy you a drink and like things like that. And you're like whoa oh fuck.

Or would you be like this chick's cute. Dick sucks ain't cheating. Let's get married. This is the.

Oh yeah. No this, this is this is a good wife material. Yeah yeah yeah. Yeah she's awesome. Yeah. Yeah that's amazing. Yeah. And she loves y image so yeah.

I don't know if she is married but you could find the man of your dreams if you appreciate that. Absolutely.

It's a great tattoo. Great job. Oh it's so great work.

Another fire truck. Wow guys. Number 42 responding guys, oh. Which one of the 42 responding guys I like when they narrate what you can totally see in front of you live for, these actors seem to fired shots. Oh, God. Wow. Lots of horn guys, lots of horn guys, wow, this. Something tells me a different scene. I wonder why that the guy making this video is the same guy put in cutups on a drill.

I mean. I feel like it's the same guy. I think you're right, Tom. I would hope, but we don't know that it could be a dad boner.

Like sometimes they get excited about trains, meet lots of horns and then look like, put the cutup in my ear.

Maybe this is just an ambulance or I'm sorry, a fire truck enthusiast. Yeah, um, we don't know that's true. I mean, listen, they are pretty exciting when they go by and the lights are flashing and the horn is going, our kids get real stoked.

It's pretty exciting. It is exciting. Do you remember last week, um, we brought this gentleman to the audience's attention, but at least she called on her handcuffs.

I got here and, you know, you know, the living should have your ass and your type in your tits. Yeah. Make you swallow my candy.

Yeah. Pretty cool. And he'll get you pregnant over and over. It's pretty cool. I remember that he's posted again.

Oh, good. In a recording right now. I'm not Labor Unlimited out here. And so a way I'm letting you all fucking know any fucker tries to put that test on me for Colbert. So fucking crap I can fuck right off their heads and fucking beaten to a pulp. Yeah, I agree.

Those covid tests are no fun. Do you think this is a good way to. Well, it sounds like this is the way the country is going.

And if you're a fucking female who wants to get fucked up the ass to screw hump to death and fucking treated like a dog. Oh, fucking with the chain, we're fucking mask because of this cowritten and crap. Well, my question would be like, what if I was a woman interested in this, but I don't want all the items on the menu.

Yeah, I think you could probably order what you want a la carte. Yeah, because I don't know if I want to get fucked or treated like a dog, but like some other stuff might be nice. I don't know.

Hey, I mean, we have his info if you want to reach out. Like I said, I want women who want to get fucked. Yeah, you know, screwed up. Yeah, I don't want that. And I don't mind that like a dog. I'm not going to take that overthinking thing and I'm going to stick it up fucking now. OK. It feels very bitch once get come and see me.

And now he's measuring the Koven stuff.

Yeah. And the piece of quality was thoughts that I really appreciate. Hey, I don't want anybody sticking things up my nose. I'm not interested in this type of tests if you want to get fucked up the ass.

Right. Right, right, right. And I'll meet in the middle. Kind of neat.

Well, it seems to me that I bet the women who are answering or the the one woman who's answering is like, will you get a covid test before I come over?

Yeah.

And he's probably like, no, bitch. I've already told you I have a tent that I can put you in. Isn't that enough? Yeah.

You know, it's upsetting to me is that he doesn't offer any alcohol or weed. Yeah.

I mean, I think he needs it. He needs to work on his like his game a little bit.

The pitch, which is a little rough, it's not really aggressive.

You only get sucked. But like it's like, well, you know, how about like like you said, like, do you want to, um, smoke a joint or have a few drinks?

And then you could show I got this year like, you know, a little bit of courting. That's all. It's really aggressive. I agree, Tom. I mean, look, even our hero, Robert Paul Champagne was like, you get a little Cinecitta, free food, free food.

I got all the booze and that worked. That worked once for him in like seven years, you know, I mean, work can work for you, too.

But look where he is now. He's a famous porn actor. He's doing great. June 28th, I'm hosting a television show. I know. It's pretty cool. So, you know, this will make you laugh. Think ready. Watch this one. Well, that makes me laugh so I could watch all over again, I like it.

Yeah. She's got like those hostess cupcakes in her hand.

Yeah, it's like six million jobs out of her seat and she goes, darn it, I know.

How do people not really curse when they're that upset?

I know that. Take that for me. Would take an extra 10 mental steps. Oh, yeah.

To be like darn instead of motherfucker. Oh yeah. Of course. You can't control that. Yeah, no. I mean it would be all bad words all at once.

She's so fat in her face but the rest of her isn't as fat. Have you noticed that.

I don't know if I can see the rest of her, but I mean, her arms don't look as fat as her face. It's weird. Is that possible that her fat distribution is.

Yes, everybody's fat distribution is different in some people. Yeah. They go to one area.

It's like significant in the undercharging and then everywhere else she could be kind of normal.

Well, you know, I was trying to have a good laugh at a horn jump, just a lady getting scared by a horn. And now we're picking her apart and how her body distributes her weight.

Oh, well, I mean.

Well, let's read a couple of messages, OK? First of all, she need to have good horses. Chicks better have one type of good ass.

Um, so somebody's message here. Hey, Hitler's just listen to your Fed smoker vault episode and you get a job here, fuckface.

I need to clear up a few things about meth sex for Tommy.

But yeah, when I was a dumb Dalmatian in my 20s, I dated this method for a while because I was at FTTH and not stingy.

I didn't notice all those Moethee red flags anyways to pacifically clear up the meth addict question I can share that meth addict cannot drill for two and a half hours or any hours for that matter. More than once I'd be awoken to my tweaker boyfriend trying to mush his sweaty Twinkie and a toddler sock into my love tunnel while grinding his teeth and glass and into the middle distance. It wasn't all bad. My apartment was never cleaner than when he was on a bender.

Meth addicts are sad dicks. Love you. Mommy's Megan from Vancouver. Oh yeah.

Megan not magor.

Yeah, you're fucking retarded. Well, that's, uh. That's really. Thank you, Megan. Yeah, thanks, Megan. Megan, you have one.

You want to read that they're Mowhoush Dicks is what she says, which is that guys don't fuck. So how is fed smoke or fucking.

Maybe he lied. Wait a minute.

What, what are you saying. Do you have make believe in any of your stories backstroker. OK, this one's interesting. Uh, there was a discussion in the past about the proper time to brush your teeth in the morning.

Should it be first thing when you wake up to get the bad breath out of your mouth or after a little while, I spoke to my wife, who is a hygienist of seven years, to get the correct timing. She informed me that it is OK to brush right away to get the bacteria that grew through the night. However, this will be surprising to you, Tom. It is best to brush after you have eaten breakfast. Her reasoning is that breakfast will be on your teeth until the next time you brush and would be worse than the stuff that grew during the night.

Keep it high and tight, Alex.

And what do you think of that? I wish I had a drop ready to go because it's not a nice one. Really.

Yeah, well, here's what I suggest. Why not brush your teeth right when you wake up? Because I brush my teeth, I do a cursory brush and then I do an after coffee and breakfast brush.

Yeah, you can do both a thorough I just don't understand deal like like you wake up with morning mouth and you're like just going to go, go downstairs, get my day started. Know so gross.

I think it's so you can just get mouthwash at least just to get that and they're like but then it's the same people, it's the same people who are like you got to look down to read the same people who put them in the coffee in the mint.

Don't go well. Just rinse your mouth out you fucking idiot.

Vice OK, this is Tom. This is your look alike. I found this in a bar in Houston. This is in the drop's folder.

It is OK drop's folder.

This guy looks just like you see, you know, we get a lot of these submissions do. They got the Cox sizing, right? I got I got to work out harder because that looks good. It does look like you. It does look good. I like that guy's body. There you go. I want to be just like them here. I got one for you. That's pretty great. So last week, we also played this hilarious video.

Man, incredible, so a painter plunged 30 feet to the ground after a pensioner in a wheelchair shook his ladder because it was blocking the pavement. Decorator Fernando Sanchez, 46, was painting the outside of a house on Boxing Day in San Marting, the poorest Lima, Peru.

The CCTV shows a ladder propped up against the three storey house, which was tied to a rope tied to a door with rope for extra stability. The video says the pensioner in the wheelchair grab hold of the ladder and shake it furiously with both hands sending Mr. Chancers crashing to the concrete. Suddenly, a pedestrian rushes over with his dog as the elderly man known locally for being rude, waving his hands in the air to justify his actions.

Mr. Sanchez miraculously stumbled to his feet before propping himself up against the car. He was later taken to a hospital.

However, he did not suffer serious injuries. He always speaks with rudeness when there is something on the pavement, when locals that police have now launched an investigation are attempting to identify the man after the incident was captured on CCTV. So that's where it happened. That's the full story. A number of people, by the way, messaged me. They were like, so the video is what you just saw there. Go, dude, how did you not know that that was Lima?

It looks like Silver Lake, that can be a part of why would I can santamonica this? But then they're like, how are you missing that? I'm like, what are you what are you talking about? Why would I know that? Guys, come on. Somebody, by the way, needs to blow covid right into that old fucking homeless guy's mouth.

So rude. He shook that guy's ladder. Yeah, they call him a pensioner. Fucking blow it, is it. Here's a here's an interesting one, you want to give some advice, hmm? Yeah, sure. OK, hi mommy. I need your advice about a smelly co-worker. We are still working in our offices, full ppy, of course, with masks, gloves and sanitizer. Even with my mask on and cheap smells of hand sanitizer, I can smell the coworker who is a cubicle away from me.

He smells like old food, garbage and sweat.

All the like fish into one knocks noxious fumes every day for nine hours. He brings in super fragrant foods to eat and eats in our open office space. We're not allowed to bring in smell goods, but I am dying a little bit every day. Try having to tolerate his stink. My boss a few weeks ago even made a comment out loud about an odor in the air while I stared at him with saucer eyes to shut the fuck up. Do you have any advice on how I can address the problem without bringing in smell goods or hurting stinky boy's feelings?

I tried vapor rub under my mask, but it's not something I can sustain long term that is unexpected.

And I don't know.

You guys have like an H.R. department in Human Resources because it's all his food that's coming in.

Him personally, like his body and his food stinks. That is fucking unforgivable, dude, especially to bring in stinky food in the office. Sounds like we got a foreigner on our hands.

Sounds like it. That's right. Tom and I put this fucking thing. Yeah.

I mean, I think there's going to be no way to deal with it unless you actually have somebody tell the guy you have to tell the other way.

There's no other way and there's no other way because H.R. will call call that person in and be like you need to where there's complaints about your smells.

So I don't know how. I don't know if H.R. does it like that, though, right. They're like your pussy stinks and your smell smell like a dick. What would we do here?

What would we do here if we would just tell people? I think so. Why am I right? Like we're so open, we'd be like, poof, you're fucking bang, bro.

There would be talk. There would be a work up to it, though.

Like if somebody would be like, hey, have you noticed so low kick?

And I be like, Nadav, he's one of yours. You handle it. OK, he's what? You make a deal.

I tell him. And Jewish code. What would you do?

Uh, yeah, I would just start speaking to him in Hebrew, like Makula, and then he kind of gets it from there.

You know, you're really like, hey, man, dial back the fucking. Well, yeah, because, I mean, like, Hebrew is so aggressive that we could get out that idea in like three syllables, really. But what would it translate to?

Uh, you smell it would just be maybe direct or actually. Yeah, three syllables.

You know, the thing about smelly people, though, I find that a lot of times they're not aware that they're smelly. They don't know ever. Yeah. Yeah. If they were aware, they take care. Right. Because they're not trying.

I mean, there are people that are, you know, like real psychos that are trying to piss people off with that. But I think most people like that aren't. I don't know. I mean, you see these people come on the planes all the time.

It's not so you don't have the B.O. factor as much as like when people bring food from their house. Oh, Mike, open up like Tupperware. And you're like, what are you doing?

Yeah, we're in an enclosed, pressurized cabin.

I have a fucking raw eggs. And the woman brought a bag of hard boiled eggs, a Ziploc bag of hard boiled eggs or a plane.

Are you insane? It's like farts. Yeah. You know, there was a girl in seventh grade who is gorgeous and she had braces and her gums were really red and bleeding and her breath was so bad. But it's one of the bad breaths that I still think about. Like it's since seventh grade. I think about this chick.

You see rotten mouth on people. You go like it never leaves, you never leaves. You know, you got you got it. You got to do dental hygiene.

It's so especially as a dad, you know, that you can have dad now. You could have dad move and then you know, and it's over. Mom mouth. Yeah. Um, OK.

We have, uh, a great guest. It'll be here in a moment. So let's take a quick break.

We're going to go eat some ice. We'll be back in a little bit to talk about it. I'd like to thank our sponsor, Wub.

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Mom. Our next guest is a brilliant man, a phenomenal athlete. He went to Duke. He's so smart. He's come in here. He came in with books.

He is also a very, very funny creator.

Cody College just nailed it. I will just refer to as Cody Cope moving forward. OK, yeah. Yeah. So you don't know how to say your own. Let them know.

So the guy said. Yeah, he said here you're pronouncing it wrong, the customs agent in Germany or something like that. He said, how do you he's like, I'm Polish. How do you pronounce your last name? And I said, Kalajzich. And he said, No, no way.

Yeah, it's called a check. OK, how do you spell it?

Do it ok o l o d z i e j z, y, k.

And then the number three that is so fucked. This is it's completely fucked here. Horrible.

Imagine being an eight trying to like do you remember being a little kid. And people are like oh Samiti H how's yours colonially Jike Kolodziej or something.

I don't know. I'm reading it Hungarian.

Yeah. You know it's like this.

I have family members that are that were born and raised here, that are educated people that don't know how to say my last thing I read and I and it has been there have been arguments and one of my relatives is very upset with me for having a public profile that has that I have hijacked the pronunciation of the last name and the people are saying it in mass incorrectly. So it's Sagara, right. So that the correct here's the thing.

I argued with them because I'm like, there is no debate, there is no either or. I go, it's a it's a word in Spanish. So there's only one way to say it. And then you can anglicize that a little bit like so in Spanish the word is Segura. Right. That's that's actually not just the last name, but a word. So if you were going to say it like an English speaking person, you would just say, Sagara.

Yeah, well, these dumb fucks that I'm related to say Segura, that's completely. And I'm like, yeah, but that's like you're just saying it like a cracker who doesn't like.

Yeah, it's not only wrong, it's racist. Yeah.

Oh, you're right.

You're offending our whole hair and like, my God, you think these these crackers we're at like the family reunion where they hired a genealogist to trace and show you they come from Spain.

OK, so I'm like, so, you know, the guy didn't say secura, but he said Sagara for sure.

Yeah.

And they still will say it wrong. What's mean? It means secure. Safe. Oh yeah. That's why I love him.

Sure. I mean, sure you can say. Sure. You know, my therapist pointed that out when we first started being together. Yeah. I was like sometimes times the girl and she's like, you know, that means safe. Yeah. Spanish. I mean that's what I need later. Yeah. But she was homeless lady so.

But most importantly, is the name pronounced Megan or Megan. Yeah. How do you say that. How do you say that. Megan, Megan. Megan. What do you say. Megan.

Megan. Yeah but that's a Canadian thing. Is it Canadian. All right. Or just the right thing. Is it what it like.

Is it a is that a Canadian thing or just how people with like an inferiority complex would say, I'm a big Megan advocate, I can even hear the difference.

Megan or Megan? Yeah. Yeah, OK. Yeah. And I think I think maybe getting Megan, I think Megan's kind of sluttier and like. Oh yeah, yeah. I guess if you're but I'm, I'm dumb. You're like a lot in Vegas. I like somebody who says Vegas, a Las Vegas bagger.

It is the Vegas Vegas debate. It's a similar debate now. Vegas. It's not Vegas. It's Vegas.

Oh, right. Megan, bag that bag. All right. Bag, bag, bag.

I say you can take. OK, what do you say for AGEA Fellag Flaig?

That's pretty dumb. Yeah.

This guy went to fucking do anything.

I told you I'm dumb. Yeah, I told you. Well let's go, let's go into how dumb you are. So sure.

Yeah.

Because it's actually we're very, very impressed with you and yes I do know the first it is, it is really a thing I think when you are not of the. YouTube world, and you hear of like somebody I've always had this bias where I hear, like somebody who has a big following on YouTube, like, oh, what do they do? Like talk about how they went to fucking the grocery store that day and like that.

And then you see the package thing. Yeah, yeah. I got a phone.

So but then you see like I mean I guess for like if you're in comedy you see like really funny, like really funny videos and you're one of those people where your shit is legit. Funny men like, thank you man.

I mean, I mean that means so much coming from you guys because I'm a huge fan of you guys. Well, that's very nice. And you're thoughtful.

I mean, you're da man video. Like we've I think we've all been entranced by Dorien, but the way that you approached it was so thoughtful and well known. Vulnerability made it.

I like that you tried to, like, do what he does. It was so awesome. But it was the origin of it is great because you the origin of it is that you went at it the same with the same venom that you did with the original thing, which was you like to fuck.

Is this. Yeah.

Because because so I posted I think I maybe I posted that the the third one like the one where I met up with them and then I got a lot of DM's from people or I guess they were tagging you or something and talking about how you were talking about on the podcast. Yes. And so you guys did the same thing did you. Well, this video. So yeah.

Like like we're always planning we're always playing videos that people send in. Right. And, you know, a few times people have been like, oh, you know, like we did the Good Morning Julia Guy. And they were like, oh, Dan Sodor and Jakobsson were doing this. And I was like, I don't know who's playing stuff at the same time or before us or anything, because, like, you just get bombarded with stuff, you know.

Yeah, right. And so we were playing the first time we see this, I'm like, what is this? Because it's, it's like so on the nose.

And it was so direct and it was, you know, like the, the word choices, the language and everything else so earnest.

It was so sincere. You know, you can't really see that kind of. Yeah.

And it was and and he gets like a lot of love.

And it was that was like I was like, like every single video is, you know, hundreds of thousands of likes which you don't see. No. Especially on short like short form, four minute content like that.

And the millions of millions. Yeah. Yeah. Like billions he's got.

Yeah. On Facebook now he's got like three billion views or something. Some crazy were.

We were absolutely amazed with you. And then somebody goes, oh you know Cody Co has has found this guy and I watched your first time watching it which I, I laughed so hard.

You were, you were just basically like doing you know what I thought it was like a normal reaction to this stuff, which it was like, what the fuck is this?

And then so many, so many layers of what the fuck. Yeah. And then and then you you you did this thing where you actually did you reach out to him or did he reach out to you?

How did how did the actual connection he he deemed me after every single one actually after after every one, after every single video he reached out.

And I think the first two I didn't reply because I'm an asshole and I'm just a dick. And I was like, I don't know. I'm also like just a pussy. I'm like, I don't really want to confront this guy. Like, he was really nice in the dorms, but like, maybe he's just doing that just so he can then tear me a new one later, stuff like that.

And then after and then and then I was sitting there thinking about like, how can I do how can I turn this into I was going to do another one and I was like three just seems like too many.

How can I turn this into something different, like something a little bit bigger. Right. And so then I looked at my dorm conversation with him and he had like Justman me for some reason. And so I reached out to him and we jumped on a Zoome call and he didn't really get it. At first. I was like, I want to do one. I want to write one for you and star in it and we'll do it together. And he was kind of like, I don't really get it.

And then, um, I wrote it and he he hated it. Eventually he was like, yeah, I want to do more collabs. So this will be good. Like a dip my toes into the YouTube collab. Sure.

Show me the toe dip again, please. Yeah.

That's the diver. Yeah. That's diving. Good footwork. Yeah. Thank you.

And so I wrote the first one and he hated it.

He was like, he was basically like this is, this isn't going to work. And these are the reasons why he was right and he was definitely right. Yeah. I mean this whole process was me being like like learning, peeling back the what the fuck layers and learning why each one was there and why he was doing what he was doing.

But how humble of you to be able to do that. I think that takes a big person to put yourself out there like that, because I was watching that. Yeah. Because he he said, like, there's three things you need to raise the stakes, right. Like, every emotion has to be really big. Yeah. And the language has to be really simple. Yes, there are non English speakers and you realize like, oh gosh, there is an art form to what this person's doing.

It may not be your art form, but you're going think your girlfriend said that. She's like, look at you learning a lesson.

I know. Yeah. The whole thing was like this weird. It was a of here's the thing. I had a similar experience. I think I was telling you that. Yeah. So we had started playing his videos and. Mocking him relentlessly, right, like I mean, like playing them and stopping the fuck is he devoted like, yeah, housecat and like his little monologues at the end.

Yeah, like what's up, da man fan. So. And it seems like he's playing a character.

It always seems like he's just put it like that the way he like over enunciates his words like what's up da man fam. You're like this is just he's just putting this on for the camera. And then when I met him it was like, oh no, this is actually this is really this genuine. Won't we face time. Yeah.

And I thought I was going to be like five minutes was like 30 minutes. And I was asking him, you know, like how did you get in?

And it was very sincere. And like, here's the thing, too, is that when you because we've had a few times where we play videos of people, we mock them. And you realize that if you're one of the person getting the video is being played of you, there's basically three ways you can handle it.

You can ignore. Right, that you're being made fun of. You can push back like fuck you and try to do something or you kind you embrace the people and the thing. And I feel like that's the most disarming word then changes the whole dynamic. Right. Because then that's it. I'm talking to DA and I'm like, I can't talk to you right now and asking you these questions. And then I ask him, I go, hey, we want to do like our own versions of your videos.

And he was like, OK. And he goes, How can I help you? Like, right away? He was like, How can I help? He's like, do you need like like staff or me to read over the script? I was like, I don't think you'd like it. Yeah, but but he was like he was very he was extremely willing to help.

Yes.

It's very surprising that he has that approach. But it's so it's so charismatic when people do that. Like, remember Charles. Yeah, exactly. It's going on. It's Charles and Charles embraced us making fun of them.

Yeah.

We found it so disarming that this guy had put up that he had put like on he had used for like match dotcom, OK. And it was just an embarrassing video because he didn't post it. It was like he had sent it to a girl that he'd met on match. And then she sent the people in and she got, you know, OK.

And it was like we just. Yeah. And we just made fun of them. So. That's right.

Yeah, it was really rough. And he he was a total sport. Like he got on a call with us on the podcast. He started making fun of his own video. And I was like, man, that is how to handle this.

That's that's that's definitely big of that guy. Yes. Because it's one thing if you post something publicly, but another if it's like, oh, I was never supposed to get out anyways.

Yes. Well, you're like, fuck it. It's out there.

So embarrassing. It was it was humiliating, I would say.

I mean, I was trying to find one of his things. What's going on?

It's Charles. That's just his audio. Just wanted to do a video instead of a text or a phone call.

This is to one girl. Yeah, yeah, yeah. What did you do? A YouTube intro.

I mean, what's up, you guys? It's Charles. Oh, say around eight o'clock. Eight fifty. Yeah, he did that.

Oh, we made fun of that. You know, you say around eight o'clock.

Well he's thinking lillies. Oh yeah.

Well we made fun of him so hard and then you know, the way the DA handled it was reminded me of that. He was like, I know that you're not saying nice things about me. Yeah. But, you know, this is what I'm doing.

He's you kill him with kindness. He had a guy like I mean, and he's got to be so used to people shitting on him because what he's doing is so out of the norm on YouTube.

No, no. But you're saying like that the YouTube and I guess you learn quite a bit. Yeah.

Like he is doing something that is not the norm. It is. And but his audience is intended for like it's intended for people who don't speak English as a first language children.

Also my sense, he said, well, like when I we talked about the English as a second language and he did. And this was again on FaceTime.

So I'm looking at him and he's very sincere about how there are times when people need like an uplifting message. And he started talking about times when he could have needed it. I immediately just like fuck. And I was like, I'm sorry, I.

I know. I know. Right. Made me feel like a piece of shit when I show up on set and he gets me this giant. I guess for your five million subscribers. You got me. Why.

It was like two boxes of like very expensive treats. My God.

And I just was like sitting there like such a such a bad person. Yeah.

Um, I just I think he's like, I hate to be nice guys.

Yeah, exactly. Yeah. He's teaching a lesson right there, motherfucker.

Yeah. That's just, you know, we ended up making three man sketches, one of which we haven't played. But I wanted to show it to you.

I would love to see this. I would love to see one of them. This is one that we just wrote and hired actors and everything.

We tried to make it like DA with like a spin, you know, see how this plays. I'm sorry, are you James James Cartwright, OK, are you here to fix the toilet? No, I'm I'm here for the campaign. The Fall Forever fashion line. Why I'm submitting myself. For what I'm a little familiar not. Yes, I am. Take a look up and down this line, you see these guys, right? Chisel, just amazing physiques.

These are models, they're genetic freaks. They are better than us. And that's why they're here. You're fat, you're way too fat to do this, not only in my dream, it's it's what I wanted to do my entire life. I bet my dream is to wrap my neck around my thigh, but I wasn't born with any length. You're not a model. No one wants to see you.

I can model. Look at his. Lift your shirt, really? Do you want to submit? Look at that perfect symmetry, lean, muscular build, the kind of body most people dream of having, but they never get their hands. He's a model. I lift up my shirt, lift it. Look. Guy. This guston. I think I'm beautiful. Good for you, man. Stay positive. No, no, don't stay positive. But, boy, stay realistic.

You have about as good a shot at modeling as you do winning a slam dunk contest.

You're so fat, so gross. Get out of here. Go live your life into something you're better suited for. This isn't it. You didn't have to talk to him like that. Back out of here, baby fat boy needs, right? Heck, you. We are coming out very clear in the report on this.

What are you sorry? Yeah, we're clear down there.

You see, even though Sergio was very direct, he was right. James would have wasted his life trying to be a model. He's just way too fat.

James is better at sitting and watching trucks drive by, and that's what he does now. Do what you're meant to do. Hey, why I'm a fan, it's dark. I don't know if you like that message because I did. We're supposed to be helping people and changing lives. But Tom and Christine are definitely not helping change any lives with that message, maybe destroying them. So please do not share this video. Go watch something else. Literally go watch anything else.

I appreciate you. And hopefully you'll never have to see one of these kinds of videos again.

Oh, man, that was so good. Thanks. That was so good. So that's what you meant by we want to make our own and we want you to be in it.

So what I have, I go we're making like we're doing our own. He's like, how can I help? And I was like, well, the only thing I could think of that you could contribute to ours would be the wrapup. Yeah. At the end. And he was like, OK. And he goes I go, look, I think the way to to wrap up is to be like because you can't say the same thing you would say on yours, but it would work if you were honest about what we did.

In other words, say things like, that's not a good message. I wouldn't share that. And I had to I kind of like talked him through and he was like, OK, you know, I didn't know if he was sold on it or not.

And I said, well, like.

Here's here's what one of the sketches I said on this one, and then I go, you know, as long as you're not endorsing it, like endorsing the meanness and the I think that it works for your for your brand, to be honest about it. So you're saying this basically. And he was like. He was he sent it to me. Wow. Yeah. Yeah. Good man. Very nice guy. That was hilarious, though. Oh, thanks.

It's really funny. What a beautiful lesson, too.

It's a great lesson, but got to just sometimes you got to realize that maybe you're not suited for things. Yeah. Yeah, kind of true.

I mean, listen, we lie to children and tell them they can do anything. Yeah. That's really not the case.

The modeling one is really, I think, speaks to our hearts that like we like our models hot.

Yeah, I, I, yeah, I agree. I very much, I've been very outspoken. I don't like fat models. I don't like models that are ugly.

Neither do I. I'm not into the ugly models. Bother me more than there's this new thing now where they're like oh this person's like fucking bone structure's weird, make them a model.

And I'm like, that's always been a thing. How's it like high fashion? I'm talking high fashion. Would you like really thin and flaky. But then like it became a thing where, like you see somebody who's I mean, I think objectively unattractive and they'll be like, oh, that's a supermodel. Yeah. I'm like, oh really? Yeah. It's a trend.

I guess. Like you saying, like when Gucci, like, releases their new year like fall collection and all the models are like, like Pale and 12.. Yeah you're like yeah. Like Litoral Canine's. Yeah. That's upsetting. It is upsetting.

Bring back the fucking 90s hot models. Hot models. Yeah. Well you know Victoria's Secret aren't they going under. Yeah. They went under and I, I was with Tommy and there was TNA for a long time. Yeah.

But I was saying you know how they could have saved that brand is if they put a you know, crazy non binary. I'm fat and I have tits and you know what I mean.

And a dick on Victoria's Secret I like they should have put it like it should have been like all fat trans dude.

I think Victoria's Secret could have done crotchless like like open like they should have gone hardcore. Like now you're thinking, I mean, like girls, chicks with dicks.

They all had that. Yeah. That would have kept their doors open. They just didn't, they didn't go with the times. He's right. Like Gucci's next door and they're open and they're selling their cars.

They got weird model. Yeah. So Victoria's Secret should have weird as they should have. I want to go back to you though. So you grow up in Calgary, so and you're in the diving. So I imagine you're just this is all indoor diving. Pretty much, right. All indoor. Yes, all indoor diving. And you're obviously I don't think there is outdoor.

I mean, cliff diving. Cliff diving. Yeah. Yeah. Not a lot of cliff diving Canada, but you go to Duke for diving. Yeah. I mean, Jesus, you that was like the only way I was going to get in.

But that's an impression not to go. It's not good.

You broke a thousand. I didn't even break it down. Oh yeah. I broke it easily.

Yeah.

He's like I know that I was that's you know, one of my favorite things is I know two rich people that tried to go one to Duke and tried to get their family to donate enough for them to go.

And Duke did not really, because that's usually how that works.

I know. Yeah. Another kid, his he was another level of rich and he was not a good student and he got in one.

Did they like donate a building or something. They did.

They donated like a new library. Yeah. You're talking like we're talking like a nine figure donation. Yeah. Yeah.

Oh yeah. That's the only I think if you donate for your whole like life, like a lot of people graduate from there and they start donating right away. Yeah. And then once they have kids then Duke's like, well you're clearly like in this for the long haul. But I think some rich people try to donate like late and hey, here's a Yeah. One check, there's one lump sum and like when you just go easy on them.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Now at Dukey. Did you like it there.

Did you. I loved it. Yeah, yeah. I mean I was, I was incredible. I went yeah. I mean I went from Canadian you know, I was like a skateboarder, snowboarder, diver, you know, war like I don't know, just ski jackets all the time.

And then I moved to Durham, North Carolina. On the first day of school. I called my dad. I said, everyone's wearing boat shoes. I don't understand. I've never seen these in my entire life. Never seen a pair of boat shoes ever.

And Croce's on the sunglasses and pastel shirts and what Croce's like those those cosies the group uses for your sunglasses.

Yeah I like it so you can wear them.

It's a very Carolina thing. Yeah I went to school in Carolina too. Oh you did a little dumber school. Didn't do. OK, where'd you go. It's a, it's a I don't know if you could have gotten in. It's called Lenore Ryan College in Hickory. OK, was an hour north of Charlotte so a few hours west of Durham. Gosh, I never was allowed to step foot on the Duke campus, but. Weren't even allowed to know, put on a public vote like your IQ is too low.

Oh. Where do you go, please?

Yes, I got I got to walk around Chapel Hill, but they didn't let me down the. But I'm so stupid. I didn't even know where Duke was. Yeah. No, I knew that. I thought these. I didn't I didn't either. When I, when I first, like, found out.

Did you know how good of a school it was? No, I didn't know. I was in a meet in Montreal and my coach at the time said, hey, the coach from I was a senior in high school or a junior maybe, I don't know, one of the two. And my coach at that time said the coach from Duke is here. Yeah, you should perform well because then Duke might recruit you and they're really good school. And so I was like, cool word.

And I went back to my hotel room and Wikipedia Duke anyway.

And it was like, you know, it was like eight, largely considered the eighth best ranked school in the state. And I was like, oh, this is the real shit. And they have a basketball team. Holy shit.

You know, you had no idea.

How far did you go to the games? The Cameron crazy. Yeah. How fun was that? That must have been. It was crazy.

I mean, like watching those specifically, like there was a there was a time where I was really into college ball and watching the Duke Carolina games were always like the high point. I mean, there was always the best when when the schools were having great seasons and playing each other. I mean, those were amazing games. I've never been. But I can imagine that to be a student and standing in that arena, that's got to be nuts.

Yeah. Just super loud. Super loud. But but like like the energy is so much fun. Yeah. But it's really hard to get in the arena. Oh yeah. It's like this whole thing about the ticketing process and that's the whole where the term Cameron crazies came from. It's like we every year students would line up outside the arena for like three months. Yeah. And then they would tent and they're just like homeless for three months and everyone gets sick just to get tickets to the Duke Carolina game.

And it gets absurd.

Like every year random like the flu spread like crazy because it turns me off that I don't want to go too.

Yeah, it's the same thing is like when you're like in Nashville and they're like, go get this hot chicken.

You just have to wait like an hour and a half to get a Hatice or whatever. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. I don't know. Thank you know not doing it.

Yeah. Can I call ahead. Can I order for pick up and then you know is there another chicken place.

Can we just go somewhere else. I don't even like hot chicken. How much it burns. It burns. It's too hot.

Yeah I agree. Hot chicken's very painful. It sucks. It does kind of suck.

I, I just, I mean I'm not a spicy food fan myself but that, that we had to try because we were in Nashville doing a show and sitting in the green room before the show. I've never had that painful of a poop in my entire life. Yeah. Yes.

Right before going like I'm you know, I'm nervous. I'm supposed to be feeling good and I'm in the bathroom just shitting flames. And I'm just so glad we had cream of wheat.

That'll make you shit.

This is a cream of wheat like oatmeal. I know, but it gives me raging hot diarrhea.

I was like, I don't know, Cody, this is spicy creamy. She she just that a she verified I did research and has found that cream of wheat definitely causes diarrhea for her.

Yeah. What do you mean. Like you like AB tests. You didn't have it and then you had it and. Correct.

Cody what I did is I had my morning like I normally do coffee and then dump and then I had my breakfast cream of wheat versus what I normally have. Right. And then an hour later I had violent diarrhea.

So the only conclusion is that, you know, diarrhea.

Yes, man. Yeah, that's that was a great experiment. It was a great experiment. Yeah. It sounds like you just had a morning. Yeah.

But since you played since you were a collegiate athlete, I found I love an aggressive coach, OK? Even coach is cursing or just being way too over the top.

Yeah. And I found this one, which I believe we we've been told is in Turkey. It'll be right here.

OK, yeah. We should step it up.

Oh yeah. That's all we got.

I hey, you know, they could have done something real bad. I know. It's like losing that we're losing right now. Slapton should I get slapped like that for not diving.

Right. I never got physically harmed by my coach but I had a Russian coach who was really mean. He used to verbally abuse us first. Yeah.

Oh yeah. What kind of shit would you like. Just like you were bad.

I thought he was fucking donkey fucking pig stuff like that. Yeah yeah. Yeah not really. No not that. No, not like the gymnast coach. Yeah.

I have a few friends who played college football that said, like everything changed so much. Like the biggest change is high school football to college football.

High school football is still like, you know, come on and try harder, don't give up. And he's like in college, they're just like, you know, you guys, I guess you're. Walking around because you're with your fat girlfriends all day and shit like that, and I was just telling them they're like you're you're fucking worthless men, like, you know, you'll never play at the next level.

You can't be, like, just, wow, completely degrading.

Did you hear that from your Russian coach? He never, never that intense. But he was he was definitely mean. Yeah. But he would do shit like he would make us stay really late and just keep doing the hard drives.

Recall the options. Mm hmm.

That's that's like, you know, that's what you see, like the twists than the flaps which are like exhausting to do.

And he would just make us do them over and over and over again until we were like, just physically.

Did you have a great diving? Is to. I think to. Well, to me and to maybe most people is terrifying. Yeah. Did you have a natural like when when before you're doing the complicated stuff. Just the simple dive where you naturally good at that, just like when people are learning to dive, you know what I mean. Like when you first jump in the pool and they're like dive and you see kids that we could go like, like arms and then the head and it kind of like no splash.

Yeah. I suppose we're like, oh yeah, I like I still can't drive like even a little dot. Did you naturally do that.

Well, no, no, no I didn't. Wow. I would say like I'm.

Yeah. Diving. It's weird. Some people have it like are gifted and some people just have to just, you know, grind it out, do the work and grind it out.

And I was one of those people but you I was never really that great. Did you like it though.

Like I love all diving the loved you like I wanted. I want to do it. Yeah.

I mean I never like I didn't know it existed before I started doing it. And when I was ten my friend was like, you want to do this, learn to dive class. And I was like sounds kind of wack honestly.

Speedo's like yeah, no way. Hmm.

That's okay. Yeah. And then and then I tried it with him and I was like, oh this is just like the trampoline, but it's, you know, going into water is is way better. And then I just kept doing it and he quit like a year after because it was okay. Yeah.

Yeah. I am so good.

Have you ever hit your head on the diving board like you go up for a jump and then bang. I'd never done it never happened to me, but I knew I'd seen it happen. I knew people who did it. Yeah, I, I've, I've seen some gnarly wipeouts like, oh, one of the girls on my team from Calgary. We were at Nationals one year and she did she was on the she was a tower platform diver. So she was on the 10 metre this one.

So crazy to and yeah. She's doing up front three and a half or something like that in the middle of it because you know, we use those little Shamis those old towels to dry off that so that you can keep your skin like slightly damp, so that sticky so that you don't slip out. So she slipped out of her tuck and just lost her. She was in the air and she landed. She face planted after three flips. So she's like moving forward, face planted on the water.

And she got on her hairline was bleeding. Her eyelids were bleeding.

She had two giant black eyes for like two months. She had to go to hospital. She had a concussion.

It was oh, while it was a famously and it was at the eighty eight Olympics and he put aids in the water.

The Louganis. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And he, he did. He hit his head right. Yeah. Yeah. And have you seen that video of him doing that.

No. In a long time. No.

See if he's doing a Gayner so he's facing forward moving backwards. So I have to move your body away from the board. Right.

So that has to be the most like. He just gets pretty wild. And then did he not medal or did he still medal. I forgot that.

I forgot. I remember that he was like he kept going. Right. He was here at least in the States. I mean, so famous. But we all knew a diver's name. Yeah, it was it was insane.

Yeah. Yeah. So that's right. Eighty eight. Sorry. It's on the other screen that he medal.

I don't remember because that's like you get zero points for that dive if you don't write, if you don't like.

Is this the one they should give you extra points for hurting yourself. Oh yeah. Bage. Oh. Oh, God damn, oh, fuck, oh, they're like, oh, no, they're like they're all those guys.

You fucked her in the pool. Thirty five. Oh to become a legend.

OK, so he still he could get back thirty five minutes later. Dambrot, any do any of the Gayner. There's another Gayner to end it. That's amazing. He's and he won gold. He won gold by a record twenty five smack in his head like that. That's incredible. Wow, that's nuts. That is nuts. Look at this. The booboo on his head.

Yeah. It's more than a bouillabaisse. It's more than a booboo.

Yeah, that's a big ass booboo, huh?

Yeah, that's wild dude, bro.

He must have grinded so many dicks after that.

Or do you think that's how fucking how high on the tide you went like in the bars crushed in there.

So was he really that famous.

Oh in in I remember I'm nine years old during that, that like this guy because also there's you know, there's less competition, meaning entertainment wise, you go back to like eighty eight the Olympics, I'm sure numbers wise. You know, that's so that's Summer Olympics, right. Yeah. So that that was dominant man like we knew like the names of so many Olympians, but then Florence Griffith Joyner and Jackie Joyner Kersee. I remember like, you know, Ben Johnson and but I remember knowing, you know, Greg Louganis was like, it's it's rare, right, to be super commodify, like you do your Wheaties ad and stuff.

Yeah, they really and it was huge. And I really think part of that is that, you know, there's the network channels at that time. There's HBO and Showtime and ESPN and like, that's it. And, you know, streaming stuff. Everyone was watching the Olympics. Everybody was watching nothing.

I mean, it's still like every four years we give a shit about a handful of people that we don't exist. Yeah. Two weeks later after they last. Absolutely. Like, who the fuck? Yeah. Why is it a cereal box.

I know. And everyone's watching Darmanin video. You know we go back to our we don't care.

No one cares about the stuff that's good year round all year every year. Dhammapada Elsberry. As an adult though I've definitely took less, taken less of an interest in it in Olympics. I think so yeah. But it maybe also because it's just way more things to. That's what I care about. I think that's part of the thing.

I've started to enjoy the Winter Olympics.

Oh yeah. What's your favorite. You like curling. What are you into. Okay.

Curling is great. Yeah. That's you guys. Oh yeah. I try my high school, my high school, my ninth and tenth grade high school that had a curling rink in it and we kold for gym class I swear to God. Wow. I like that I'm the most Canadian shit ever.

So that's the thing I like about curling is that you can also look like a bowler and be curling. I love sports like that. I like the snowboarding.

I think that's really fun. Snowboarding stuff really hard and cool. And I like watching girls who can snowboard. Yeah, I love it when the girls kick in, the girls kick. They're kicking ass now.

Yeah bro. Yeah, yeah.

So wait, so Duke, you're diving, you're, you're having fun, you graduate, you get literally.

I was a frat boy.

You were. Oh yeah. So I was I mean we don't talk about how scary like diving was in general, like doing it at six a.m. when I had been up to since four all drinking at a bar, at a frat mixer or whatever.

I did that so many times were they know it. Coaches know. Oh yeah. They had to. I mean, we come in just reeking like alcohol, like bags under our eyes, like like like how long diving practice.

Like like an hour and a half.

Two hours. But that's the first one. I have another one. No that same day. And then strength training afterwards sometimes. But it was crazy. How did you do your homework. I didn't.

I might. I almost failed out my first couple of years. I got I took Biology of dinosaurs, which was a class made for athletes. The whole fucking class was football and basketball players.

And it all seemed like a real biology of depression class.

All you had to do is memorize the names of dinosaurs.

That is just so funny.

It's like for sure that guardianship was recommended by like a defensive coordinator on the football team to somebody acting like, let's get a class going. Yeah. Where I can send you some of these fucking dumb dumbs. Yeah. And that just keep them in the program. Yep.

And I got a D you got to be in for dinosaur butt, but I was one of the lowest grades of the whole thing. Like I everyone else got a name, everyone else in the class. I mean we had like study groups where we had to like memorize names.

Is this kindergarten or college. I don't know. And I was one of the one of the only people that got a D in that class.

So I'm serious. When I said I really almost failed out, you really did.

But you didn't have time to study. You were exercising all day. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And partying. Yeah. So when you graduate though, do is it immediately that you get into this app, because I know you, you had app success which is really crazy and I feel like, I feel like every guy that I know.

Basically, his like has floated the idea that they're going to start a nap. Yeah, yeah, right. It's a very it's very dude centric where it used to be used to be. Yeah.

Now it's it's a it's more now it's like we want the least amount of apps on our phone, you know, but for but every dude is like I have an idea for it.

Yeah. Every guy you meet is like a building. I know guys who have been like building this app right now. You're like, okay, yeah.

But you actually did. Yeah. Well tell us tell me what the app was.

Well I was like I was doing I was studying computer science, so that was my major. And I, like all my friends, were getting internships and I didn't get a single internship like the whole college. I would just go home for the summer and. Go to the lake and stuff like that and was just like lazy, yeah, and then so like senior year came and they were all like had jobs lined up and I didn't. And I was like, well, the way I can get a job is because everyone wants an app right now and everyone's working on their own apps or whatever.

I'll just make my own app and I'll make it a really simple idea just so I could, like, teach myself how to how to do it.

Because, like, computer science in college is a lot of like just the guy feels the dinosaur class and he's like, oh, and I basically built my own app. I mean, and what world could you are?

But this is like real entrepreneurs you can build like because entrepreneurs don't always do.

You know what it did though, but it just put like random captions on pictures. Yeah. So it's not like I was making Facebook or anything like that.

I just it would take a picture of someone or you'd upload one from your camera roll and it would just put up like dildo or like would just make it a meme.

Great. Yeah. That's so smart. I mean, I mean you sold it.

Yeah, yeah. Yeah. So you got paid for your dumb app idea. Yeah. Yeah it was. Yeah. It was really lucky.

I bet you did better than a lot of the people who got jobs. Yeah I definitely did. Yeah.

Because I, the job was great and I got to move to California which is like what I always wanted. So you took your money from that.

I made like one hundred and twenty grand, 60 grand cash, 60 grand in stock in the startup that I was working for because they hired me in the process and I spent all the money on like, you know, well, most of it I'm like, I don't know, just like living my first year expenses.

Yeah. Strip clubs. We yeah.

All the strip clubs in Palo Alto. Yeah. So the best strippers in the country.

And then, and then I work for the startup for two years and then eventually quit and then they went under so the equity didn't turn into anything and, but then you said it's not like I.

But here's the thing. When do you realize OK, so I'm always fascinated by like the YouTube making videos.

What do you do you know how to edit or do you figure that out when you start doing videos. Yeah, I didn't know how. You did know how.

No, because that's another thing that I would say is the consistent thing I've seen amongst the YouTube is that I think are actually funny. Like really funny is the the editing is superior. Right. Like you that I feel like Ethan Klein. So like the edits are. It's not just like making a font, like I'm a funny personality. It's that moment when you cut like it's the same thing when you watch, you know, a great a sketch or something.

It's like the edit has to work. Yeah. Like in the movie you watch a good movie and it can ruin or make the movie. Yeah, but your editing is is you know how to make it funny. It's funnier because you edit.

Well thank you. I yeah I for a long time prided myself on, on that and would edit every single one of my videos. Now I have a guy that I work with but he, he got the job because I posted a tweet that was like, hey, you know, I'm really looking for an editor and, you know, send your you know, whatever your whatever it's called, you're you're real, real, real. Thanks. Send your real to my email address.

And he basically took it upon himself to make a video exactly.

In my style and edit it exactly as I would have edited it and sent it to me. And I was like, this is perfect. Perfect. I wrote him on the spot. Yeah, he's been just nailing it ever since. Yeah. But it took me a long time to really find someone that that could do that.

When did how long did it take before you realized that what you were doing on YouTube wasn't like just, you know, everyone can open an account, start posting where like when did how long did it take before you? Like there's a real following building. People are you know, this is really growing.

I mean, it was it was a while before it was substantial enough where I could, like, actually make it a full time job. Like, I had a lot of followers on Vine.

That's how I started doing this little stuff. Yeah, I find that OK. And that's important to the editing, the timing of things.

That's all warm. Yeah. That's why it was cool for me because there was no editing. It was just, you know, you put your thumb down on the screen and that was the whole creation process. And so, like, the making videos was a lot less like daunting and stuff. At that point, it was like, I'm going to buy a DLR and teach myself this. You're trying to be a programmer. And so this was like an easy way to start making comedy videos.

And then eventually I built an audience on there and then that went under. And so I had to start from scratch on YouTube, start from scratch, pretty much like I was I was like blogging in the start of my videos. We're getting, I don't know, like ten thousand views, which is not enough to make it a full time thing. Right. And so I really had to, like, learn what style suited me, you know, like what style of editing and.

Yeah. And the length of content, like it's a whole different ballgame. Vine was like six seconds every time and you just make one punch line, but you've got it really well.

Men really on YouTube. It's incredible. It's long, I mean long form like it's twenty, twenty one minutes I noticed. Right. Twenty minutes sometimes. Yeah.

Yeah. The Darmanin one was like why wasn't it. Yeah. Yeah. It's so fascinating when they talk about this.

We're fascinated with YouTube because it's such a different world than like the standard. Everybody get world into our own world.

I mean, like we're like so we had such blinders on to just our stand up world.

No, but you guys were like, I mean, pioneers and like the video podcast world, that's just as much YouTube ing as I think we've discovered that.

Yeah. Like over time. Yeah. You know. Yeah. But like.

Yeah, that's true. I forgot about that. Yeah. Like Joe Rogan and you know, people that have been on doing video podcasts for a long time, that's like one of the main a lot of people think of the platform loves on the long form podcast like yeah yeah.

But we didn't really like I remember I was telling somebody that I think Bert Krischer first told me he was like, oh, you know, H3 like.

And I was like, what's that? And he was like, there's these YouTube ears and they're really funny.

And I was like, OK, yeah. Like, that's just like I think stand up cynicism, right?

Then, like, we think we're the best. That's just the truth.

Well, I think the like whatever when somebody says, like, someone's really funny and they're not, I kind of like I'm like bullshit. Yeah. So but then I watched one of the videos and I was like, oh, this is actually really funny. Yeah. That was really I thought the same thing about your video.

So but but it has like opened my our eyes I think to like just like, you know, there's so much more out there. Yeah. It's almost back.

This all goes back to Greg Louganis hitting his head on the top. Yeah. Yeah. There's just so much out there. Yeah.

It's it definitely is a lot. It's easier to do a YouTube video than it is to do an open mic. Right. So you just get a lot more, you know, his head. So because I had to do it.

Well, what's daunting about the YouTube world for from what I see as an outsider, it's like you have to take into consideration what people are commenting. And then there's like this other YouTube that you've got beef with.

And then you guys go through that, like there's so much going on in the world.

Yeah, but I just mean, like the barrier of the barrier to entry. Oh yeah. Yeah. Oh like yeah. You know, that's why you get so much like here's what I got from Trader Joe's.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. And you're not going to go to an open mic and say your grocery list. Yeah. You will get rich.

You will. And over my just in case. Yeah. I think I've done that before. People have gone over my ass and you're like, I hope you don't do this anymore. Yeah.

Yeah that's true. Because in our world like you will get shit on so hard. Yeah. It's not. Want to do it again.

How did you deal with that. Because this is something I think that happens no matter what, like your content is where when you started to build a a real following, did you have the moment where you had your first I don't know if it's even happened, like backlash video where you get heavily critiqued about something and you're like like it's an emotional ride, like, Jesus, everyone's shitting it.

Like, has that happened? Yeah. Yeah, that's happened to me.

I've also like I kind of feel like now I've been on the Internet for so long that it's like people just start to not like you. Yeah. Or and they start to like the old you. Right.

It's like and I'm getting a lot of, you know, now, especially like with the DA man video and stuff, it's like it's like people that like the first two versions.

Right. Are very, you know, vocal about the fact that this one is not me.

It's like you change man. You've changed. It's like but I, I'm, I'm almost thirty.

Like I'm not going to fucking just you should be exactly as you were at eighteen though man. Yeah, exactly. Yeah. So it's so lame that you've been evolving. Yeah. Yeah, yeah.

That's, that's true because people will critique your mom's house for that very thing.

Like I liked it better when you guys were just too broke, you know, childless people in Silverlake and it's like, sorry, we had kids and we have a mortgage.

Yeah.

We just we evolved and we try to still be fun. But you know.

Yeah, things you have to change. People changes, people changes. But we're still stupid. Yeah, that's right. It's still seven billion to Lenore in college.

That'll never, ever change.

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Mom, you're comfortable in the water.

Would you ever do something like this or neutral or in reverse or is it a shark? Yes. Yeah, I do. What's this all about? Now wait.

Wait till you see what you do. Doesn't look. That's not a basket.

You didn't know, did you not know? I think he thought it was like a nurse and he jumps out I think looks like a fucking great white man.

I was pretty chill about that too, bro. That's not a bad scheme. Screenshot this anymore. Oh yeah. Yeah. Basking shark doesn't attack humans, but that fucking thing does.

I'd be like, oh my God, get in the boat, dude. He's like, I touched it, bro. You isolate that.

That's not a bad good shot. So great.

Yeah, he did. He absolutely. By the way, I think to keep his friend from panicking and during a meeting he stopped himself from saying great what he gave me love.

Like watch this. He's like, yeah, we're in big fucking cities.

It's huge. It's huge. Oh, great idea.

Oh yeah.

Right there. Vorlon.

What, what do doesn't.

Yeah I thought that's right. Showed the video. You almost died.

That's a get in the boat. Get in the boat bro. Get in the boat. Oh my God.

Yes I will do that. I would do that again.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah yeah. I mean you would die beautifully and yeah yeah yeah. That's, that's for sure. My dad will be a lot better than he did.

Guys check out coatis dive on this and you get mangled and we're like yeah but did you see the beginning when he jumped in front two and a half to perfect dive you reflects on people like when you're at like a resort and you know, I mean, like you're walking by the pool, you're like, check.

This is the first actual I.

The thing about diving is, is if you stop doing it, you lose it. Yeah. Yeah. Because it's so unnatural that you lose that muscle memory, like right away, because your whole intuition is for your for your body to protect your head. You never seems like, you know, your body is like anti land this way to the train yourself to do that. Oh right. And then if you don't do that then you lose that. That's it.

And it goes quickly. Yeah. Oh yeah.

Where would it be a kind of thing where if you took, I don't know, during the year, maybe summer or something, you go home like you get back diving, you're, you're, you're like, wow, I'm, I'm super sloppy right now.

Like you had a few weeks off from. Oh yeah. Oh yeah. Totally. Yeah. Yeah.

That would happen every single year. Are you surfer. Yeah. Yeah doubt. Are you. Oh yeah. Fash I have attempted ok I'm terrible but you know it's so cool, it's so nice being out there.

It's, I love it. I love it. It's such a pure like I started probably four years ago now and only really started taking it seriously like probably two years ago like and I'll do it like every single day.

Every day. Yeah. Because like, wow, you kind of have to if you want to get better as a thirty year old, it's like I mastered it early and I got bored with it.

We go, yeah I know you're not into surfing anymore. Yeah.

Oh my God. I just did it like the summer. I took a lesson with my friend and I was so exhausted I was like, I'm too old to get into this again, like you can do to thirty, forty four. I'm like but still fun.

It's still nice to be out there. Yeah. Oh yeah. It's like very soothing. Yeah. And it's also like the only thing in my life that I'm slowly getting better at that has no other, there's no social aspect to it. It's just so that's what I mean by pure. It's like I go out, I get a little bit better every single time. Yeah. And you just don't, you don't do that anymore.

You know, you don't have a hobby that you just do it for the joy of. Yeah exactly.

It's like no money involved. No nothing. I just go out there, I just do it because I love it. Yeah. That's actually very cool. We're just trying to do that for the rest of your life really. You know, and taking we going to Costa Rica when you're 70, you're. Oh yeah.

Oh yeah. How's your pop up bro. If it's getting better. I think that's the hardest part. Yeah.

This one you're like Jean High Baboon xxxi or as you. Oh yeah. Oh he's. He's. Being aggressive. Oh, shit, when they open their mouths, it doesn't like you already. Oh, it's like, oh fuck you, fuck the Galloway bitch.

Oh shit. Oh, shit. At them. Yeah. Fuck, yeah. It's on her face.

Oh, hey, can I tell you something though. Yeah. I learned this from listening to Joe Rogan. Yeah. When a monkey shows their teeth. Yeah. It's a sign of aggression and you need to teach your kids, hey man, back the fuck up. This animal wants to attack you. So I think this is a great lesson to teach your kids when you see monkeys in the what?

What am I doing that shit to you? Oh, like, it's not a smile. It's not so much it is aggression.

And yeah, the interesting thing is that your chimps do is that they will show you their teeth and then as if you're a man, they'll bite your fingers off. They'll rip your testicles off. Yes. Charming. They'll they'll rip your teeth, your jaw out of your face and they'll peel strips of your skin off your back like they're pieces of bacon. Kind of cool.

Think we learn this when we are on Joe's show?

No, we're talking about that's why I watch this in the documentary where a chimp trainer was like, you have no idea how much these animals will fucking it.

Yeah, yeah. Don't fuck with animals. Yeah. Why are you fucking with the animal? It doesn't want anything to do with you and then you throw fucking Kibbles at it or whatever. Yeah.

They were like, I mean, you know, she doesn't know now but the parents need to know. Yeah. Teach your kids you dumb shit.

Oh yeah. Is there anything funnier than gagging.

I know. No. Like someone almost throwing out all the funniest thing I will get.

Oh wipe your kit off dude. Stop filming. What are you doing. Like like rabies in the fucking poop problem.

Her face is like there's shit on my face. I tend to your kid. Yeah well because they're good. I'm glad you recorded actually. So it was important. It was important. It was more fun for us.

You know, Halloween's coming up. I love Halloween. I was on your platform. The topic. Oh, God.

And I found this talk by random I randomly trolling.

Are we going to do talks now? We'll go into the segment. We can we can argue the tock, tick tock, tick tock.

The clock is looking for me.

Oh, that's our tick tock segment in the video we want to know.

So this one, though, by random. I'm watching this video.

Also this after first, just like watch the video shock thinking.

I don't know. Dude, I work fucking 60 hours a goddamn week to pay for my shit. What the fuck are you doing? What's your name?

I'm not telling you my name. Right. I really do. Is I want you to know that. Well, you're fucking getting blasted, motherfucker. Me and my brother do shit, actually, like do syndrome. Down's syndrome. You know what I mean? Like, we're just retarded. Like, fuck. Ah, I can get the money. So that's it.

That's the talk. But here's the thing. I see this video. I'm scrolling and then I'm reading the description and it says hashtag y image hash tag your mom's house podcast. I'm like, what?

And then I go to this guy's profile and he's like, Your mom's house brought me here. The madness kept me here.

So this guy joined Tic-Tac. And this has a million plays on on Tic-Tac. This video. Hold on.

This kid joined by the guy filming, the guy filming joined, he said, because of this podcast and then tagged our even though, you know, I just I just saw it afterwards. I was like, what? But he was like this. I'm tagging them.

And then the rest of these here are from, uh, Christina's corporations. Yeah. All right. So here we go. See, Christina finds what she likes to call. Just so you know, Cody Dark talks, OK, the tick tock, that tick tock doesn't want you to see.

OK, this is this is OK. I go off the algorithm. Yeah, right. It's like the dark night. Yeah. It's like, you know, regular tick tock. It's like, oh we're doing a doing a fun dance. I made cupcakes and stuff. That's not what Christina will be like.

Do you, have you heard of so-and-so. And I'm like, no, that's not my feed bro.

You independent. You get like you ever get like you ever come across weird drug ones. Yeah.

Where people are like super high on like heroin all the time and they have like three likes.

Yeah. Yes. That's what I like about all the comments are like being there bro.

How did I end up. Who has been here. Who has been there. Yeah. There's a crazy one.

There's like a meth lady with like holes in her face right now.

And I don't want to I'm just the man I'm I'm seeing what's in the folder and it's so good. It's disturbing. OK, you ready? Ready. I'm strapped.

Yeah. Hi there. Very help in here. Message to her followers. The people on the street, men and women treat her right. Stop disrespecting women, men and women out there and the other people because women are what makes the world go round. Show love towards women.

Go home in here. It's likes to say his name before every again very helmond.

This is Christina's algorithm.

I mean, he's right, though, you know, you should you should say, yeah, men and women, men, men, women and men. Everybody should be nice people. Yeah.

Hey. Oh no. I've been thinking straight for the past couple of days in ginger ale because I'm doing what I'm doing. I'm sick. So hopefully when I'm done being sick, I'm going to go back to make my mind up. I just don't think I'm sick. How the fuck was she saying?

Guys, you understand that she's not drinking her Mountain Dew now because she's sick, right? She'll go back to drinking Mountain Dew. No, I think we all put it together.

Oh, why didn't you guys me? I didn't understand a single word.

So when she's not feeling well, she's more of a sprite go. Right, right. I got it. And then when she when she's done with this illness, she will resume drinking. Do we know what the illness is? I'm sorry? Do we know her illness? I don't know. I think it's one that's that goes with Sprite.

Is there an illness or does she just have no teeth?

Oh, well, that's a prerequisite for these talks is no teeth. Oh, this is one, by the way, that is not in the. But I wanted to show Cody this one, too, because, I don't know, it's stuck with me. Oh, no, no. Carol, watch. Earwax. There you go. It is brain or something like I was really waiting for something great. Now you just shorts out, but he's so proud of his earwax.

I was just made aware of the followers that I had. Now they have been unfollowed and the majority of mine that I follow are easily musicians that I support, upcoming artist on every media that I have. But if you send me a message and want to be followed, I will definitely follow every one word that lets me know as majority does not want to be followed by me. What? So send me a message and you are instantly followed instantly.

That was one of the most confusing things that was like complete like figure out like. Yeah, what's going on. How do I decipher what it is.

So Alice is a lady who she says she's 63 and she's really in good shape. She's really skinny and she's got these huge tits.

So milkers, big, dumpy flab waggons. And I was curious about them. So I put on my stories and then she made a response on tech talk like these are my breasts, blah, blah, blah.

But what I like about her is that she's 63 and doesn't understand how social media works. She's treating her followers like they're just like. Do you? I mean, like, I have to address every single one of them. I'm fascinated by old people on social media. Can I show you one? Yeah, OK.

I love that. Let me can I just played into the mic. Sure. Everyone is your favorite talk. Yes. It's like this.

Ninety five year old grandma and she's like, I'm so bored I just want a boyfriend. Oh I know her. Yeah.

I just want someone to dance. I wanna dance with. No we cannot go dancing. Yeah. Because of Kovik.

Is that what it is. Yeah. OK, I know you're talking about, I thought that she like brain farted or something and just immediately like back on what you just said it was because it was early in the pandemic and she was like, I like to go dancing, Weyco.

I can't go dancing. Oh no, no dancing.

Yeah, she's great. I don't know where she's been though. I've she may be dead. I'll tell you where she's been.

Yeah, she's done right. Yeah. So your next thoughts go.

Welcome to that. But stuff video part two. Nice. This is crucial information. Again, if you're not over eighteen or you're just not at about stuff, please keep scrolling. OK, guys, here's the good part. The anus is a circular muscle, abnormal, normal resting state. That muscle is super clenched to make it relax.

Take some nice deep breaths in and out, in and out and release all that tension now gently lubricate a finger.

I can feel inserted about an inch and slide the finger over me up or down and feel that release.

Relax. Is this your app that you created?

Takes the desired relaxation point is hit and you're ready to go. Make sure you're slow on entry, but with all this preparation, why are you talking like this? You're a doctor.

The doctors on tech talk freak me out because they all try to, like, educate, but in like a trendy way to to people that are having sex all the time. Yeah, yeah. It's so weird right away, though.

Like, if you see this, like if you see this guy's video and you walk into a doctor's office and you see this guy, I'm like, yeah, like yeah, this guy's post and like how to finger myself.

Like I don't want to, I don't want him checking me out.

I want to get I want a doctor who's off of tick tock all the time, doesn't even know it exists. Yeah.

Yeah. There's, there's plastic surgeons that post the surgery.

I know. I'm so against it, yeah, I hate it, I hate it. Yeah, I actually feel it. I love watching chiropractic videos like I like them on YouTube. There's a there's a bunch of them. Yeah. And they're very soothing. But I told myself, like, if I if I saw one of these guys, I wouldn't want them to be like, hey, I'm a videotape. I'll be like, no, dude.

Yeah, that's just me. Yeah. Like, I'm not here for the content.

I want you to fix my back.

He's like, come on, come on, man. I'm, you know, put it up. It will be great. Oh, no.

It's like the attorneys that advertise on television. Yeah. I'm like, I'm Larry Parker. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Now you want, you want to here's the way you want a lawyer who somebody wealthier than you refers you to like this guy. You can kill someone.

This guy. That's who you want. Yeah. And someone who's like you can't afford me like OK, give me his number. So that's the guy he never advertises. No. You know, he's just he's got people that'll break into your house and steal your shit like that.

Kind of. Yeah. That's the lawyer you want, right? Oh, there she is. I carry I carry telepathy and clairvoyance. It is true. It is psychiatric certified that it's street. And if I tell you something, please take that you're there.

It is. That's the end of the video that's out and she's on drugs more.

We're talking earlier about the drugs or you're you're serious when you said tick tock, that's wild. She's clairvoyant, though.

That is pretty good. But you're right. She's got like the three legs. And then the comments that are like, I've been there, I hear voices do is like, yeah, yeah.

Exactly. Because Amen, sister. Yeah. Like, why aren't these why don't we see this on Instagram or Twitter or is it just better like hiding it or.

Thank you. Why is take talked to one platform that literally everybody uses. I agree.

I don't know. Reelz is fucking dog shit. I can't access anything as pure as this on reels. I think it's because the algorithms designed to show you aspirational behaviors, money, beauty, things, this is more of an equal platform.

Everybody's welcome. But it does feel like, I don't know, like from from my perspective, if you go get a an unsophisticated, technologically speaking, you know, person onto a platform, I would think they would be drawn to the other ones first.

Like for Tic-Tac seems, you know, from the outside, like, oh, that, you know, there's there's music and duets.

Yeah.

I think it would be more complicated for people, but it seems to be like the easy one to go to.

Oh, I see what I mean. Like yeah. Like it's harder to interpret what the fuck is I mean I don't know. Instagram is like a behemoth now. Yeah. Imagine just trying to use Instagram for the first time.

Now with all the different forms of posting, there is much at least this there's like one feed of videos. Hey, makes a lot Instagram.

Yeah.

They fucking suck Instagram like us. Yeah. They phlegmy all the time. Oh really. Yeah. I get messages like from my agent, they're like hey the hills.

Like you got to take the shit that's like, you know, full frontal nudity you should know by now is not allowing your posting like Piers Paris shitting out his balls on Twitter.

That's for Twitter allows anything but like but Instagram because Facebook owns them, you know they'll they'll just like Facebook.

The Facebook is so like a confusing platform where like they allow, you know, politicians to make false claims, like we're not going to we're not going to supervise or call any of that.

You can make any claim you want post about it. And that's good.

It's done on Twitter. No Facebook, Facebook, Facebook. Like, you know, Zuckerberg testified like we're not.

Right, right, right. Right. We don't we don't care. Yeah. Like we not our. But people are believing all this misinformation. He's like, oh yeah. And then but then like you post a photo they don't like and they're like, we'll delete your account.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. I don't think with nudity in my friend's face covered in cum like silly stuff. Yeah. It's just, it's just silly stuff and you tick tock fucking losers.

I mean you're fucking losers. Most of you are liars, cheats, thieves. And as an older person I fucking know this. So shit.

This is how we all feel. Yeah. He's just saying it's good and good on him. Yeah. I like how it ends up. I don't know that the time limit.

Yeah that's great. You can't see the giant bar across the screen going to like this.

I had everywhere. How fun by.

Take a look and another one gets old. Flip flop. Yep. Get what is at the end.

I don't know. We move on. It's on the flip flop. Yeah. Gosh I mean it's funny.

The tick tock algorithm is like. So like. Intelligent like it'll show you exactly what you want to see and then it'll sprinkle in a little little of this, so you might you might like this. Yeah. Have you tried foie gras?

Yeah, because it tries to give me like white girls don't like doing cute dances like. No. Yeah.

So this guy, just so you know, I really taken a liking to this guy. He's an entrepreneur.

Yeah. Yeah. Well he yeah. He's not for starting a business.

He is also he does a thing where he always says hello to like women above 18 crowd.

He makes the distinction. OK, good morning. Above 80, ok. And then he's like let's see those boobs.

OK, so he's that's that's why I know he's into so far. Hold on.

Let me get my glasses on. He's wearing a collar, you know, choker on. I couldn't see what it is, ok. Oh it's one of my beautiful queens above eighteen. Oh good morning dear. You look so beautiful today. You are on your way to work or on your way to college. See a phone call. Oh OK. You have a beautiful day. Who don't you enjoy your time out and remember that King loves you above eighteen.

You look very beautiful today. OK, I love the outfit. You are going to find a king someday. Very special man who's going to treat you like a queen. He talks like from today day. I'm going. You enjoy your day. OK, have a good day. All right.

Jesus, I know he's repetitive. This is like this is the same thing. He doesn't know how it works. Yeah, I don't think that's so bizarre. Watching this is like what's the goal? Is he sending a team or how do you accidentally post that publicly.

Yeah. Why would you post it? I think as soon as I saw I be like, I don't post this.

No, I like the way we've always we've seen the ones where the guys are like, oops, I missed you.

I want you to come back to me. And you're like, that's you don't need to post that. You just send that to someone.

I don't think they know, though. I think he thinks that that this went right to the the beautiful.

Yeah. Above eighteen. This is a full conversation. Mm hmm. Mm hmm. Yeah.

And that's but you guys don't get it. Is it is his shirt business and it's come out. Yeah. But you know, understand that like to the queens who are above eighteen, uh like he's talking to us. Yeah.

I'm on my way to college. I sent him a snapshot of what I'm wearing.

By the way, I like a man who is now that I've seen a number of his videos, who is so careful to constantly point out that he's talking to you if you're above eighteen, has made such an error before, like he has accidentally had deep, like deep encounters with somebody who wasn't a course, who is is this guy.

That's why he's doing it.

Like, you don't make you're not always like again.

Oh, I see. If you're eighteen year old, I'm saying hi. Unless you fucked that up horrifically.

Yeah.

Like he I don't I don't think it's because he accidentally, uh, commented on a 17 year olds, you know. I mean. Yeah, yeah.

But he was way younger. He's like, hey, he's making the point.

You got to be there. When I blocked your gods and I go for a half horny start to your face always.

Well I mean, I'll be honest, the flow of combat, it's, it's never that simple, just a waterproof combo. However, if I were to see it in actual combat, yeah. It would be walking high guard switch to half sweating. So I'd have saw you holding the blade right now. Walk to the place to disengage yourself. Disengage. Is MediaVest around. Yeah. Beautiful underbelly. Yeah, yeah. Yeah.

So these are guys that just give the lessons on these are nerds who play video games and think they can do sword play in real life. They're like this is a oh kill hobbit or whatever cupid shit.

But he was trying to own the first guy. I think the first guy did his video and then he stitched in was like, actually do me. Yeah.

A lot. Really. That's how the movie goes about this. Yeah. Right. Well I guess yeah. It's uh. Yeah it he definitely got that school.

The other writing is not vegan. Oh boy. Horses, bodies don't exist for humans to put cause around their mouths, sit on their backs and take over their bodies just for our pleasure. Important we can care and love horses without using their bodies as objects vegan. Wow. Well, it's official, everybody's a victim to some regard, even the horse community is now in need of advocacy.

Yeah, everyone everyone's got a cause, you guys. Even the horses. Yeah, I fucking hate horses. Do you like horses? No, I'm, like, severely allergic.

You are like a walk near horses and I'm just a mess. Yeah.

Just couldn't could never do it. And it's even better that you're here because we're very anti horse here. That's that's amazing. Yeah.

That's why I came on actually. Yeah. Thank you. Yes, I know.

I was in summer camp. I was probably like 10 or something like that, and I and I went horse riding because I was like part of summer camp and my horse was in one of the back and like, it stayed to eat some shit. And I'm like, go, go, fucking go. And then it, like, lifted its head and saw the rest of the group was way past the field and it just went full.

Gallow No. And I almost got bucked off and I cried for like two days. Yeah.

And now that is terrifying. Yeah. That's why I don't like them either. It's crazy, unpredictable, strong. They are, they're just such powerful animals. Yeah. Yeah. I didn't like writing them either. Yeah. Too much hated it. It's scary and it hurts your butt.

And I'm going to try something for the chick pineapple's.

If you guys are asking what this is about read and some of the thank you's I got.

I know you don't have to.

Look what she's cooking, she's putting brown sugar in this pineapple. I mean, it's so much sugar.

This is what it looks like. I'm going to take the chicken and put it over some right. I'm going to cook a little rice. And he writes for the. That looks pretty doable, right?

Yeah, I got I got it to look like.

But what is she going to eat it with? Rice. Rice got over rice. I got it is what it looks like. She's still like six times Jesus.

No, she is not holding me captive. Oh yes. I am holding him a cabbage. I'm holding him with cabbage as cabbage.

I'm holding him as calm as Cat one is as all the haters out there. Look at the cabbage like Smiley. He can smile to me.

My son in law fuck all the haters that kid has is he got kidnapped.

I feel like being held cabbage. God, what are you talk about.

No, I talked out. You can tap out. It's a lot. My feet is not for everybody.

I'm beginning to discuss fun satanism. And so to start this off, I need to define what evil meme is written off a script. In short, evil as an adjective is when something is profound. Oh yeah. Good or absent of good. In the following videos, I'll compare ideas present high school paper with this definition I see reading.

If you like my videos, check out the comics for the link to a Dischord server I've created. Thanks for watching it on yourself.

And you'll see that's the that's the new dark web is like Satan Dischord servers.

Yeah. Hail Satan. Now would you say you're a professional, you tupa and and you know Vyner like reading off a prompter or the script is not the way to go.

Right. I do like the way I do my videos. Most of them now like individually on my channel is all right. I'll like Loosley script it and then I'll, I'll just I'll keep looking at the screen, but if I'm like reacting to something, it just looks like I'm watching whatever it is. Right. Or it looks like I'm glancing away for a second.

But you're not like. No, I'm not like I can't see my eyes moving like this, you know. It's ridiculous.

All right. Old fashioned nerd. I am also of the Green Lantern Corps.

I am ready for battle. I may not be able to unify. This battle goes you, but I have my own uniform, my own look, and I'm ready for battle just as well as you are. OK, thank you.

What happens to boys? They want to fight and battle?

Well, this is a guy. This is it. You're your typical guy who hasn't actually done anything. Yeah. So he starts living in fantasies. Right. Like he's I don't know, you know how old he's thirty something and he's like, I can battle you. It's all fantasy. Yeah. Because he didn't actually. You know, I mean, yeah, I do stuff. Yeah, I didn't sign up for anything real, you know, he's making video of a fight.

You like Green Lantern plus I've ever held a sword. Yeah, it's very heavy.

It's awesome. Yeah. Makes you feel super powerful.

I bet you the real sword, though, if you could give me something to drink said baby, baby, baby.

Now, this one was interesting because it was like, if you want something to drink. Yeah. Subway is somebody known for its drinks. Real good Sprite, good sprite.

Their little Sprite hits a little bit different at Subway. You want something to drink?

Subway dog.

That's where it's I think the cookies are usually a thing that. Yeah, yeah. Oh, the cookies are good. It's definitely not the subs. I'll tell you that. That's not. What's up guys.

Twenty two on here. Right. Go Trump. Very cool, very cool. I don't like to get too political on the show. That was pretty good one. I mean, like, he's just telling you who he's going to vote for. Yeah, it's a good thing to know.

OK, you guys, I'm looking for a new girlfriend right now. So looking for a new girlfriend, that's it, I'm here. That's good. Do you think you got a lot of response? God damn it, we can go dancing when you're single, do you? To post like that? Like, I mean, yeah, that's how I met Kelsey's girlfriend.

Just like this. Just like that's a positive sign. Yeah. I need a girlfriend. He's like he looks really sad.

Hit him up. Somebody please be my girlfriend. Hey, guys, I'm watching Netflix, I watch the full house, this is my kid right here. She's watching full house to my right. Yeah, I am. I am. Watch your full house. Right. And other kids over here. So, yeah, we watch your full house right now. But I want to know what you are doing in here.

Oh, that's the guy. Oh, that's the guy. That's the nothing else.

Yeah. He's showing you. He's just mentally not.

Like, you know, the single is single, he's single. We're talking about a single. Yep, you're right. Yes, I think so, yeah, there's only one thing up there.

Says. OK, we got to end this here lot, your body. Twenty one, two wearing. Oh yeah. You have a wonderful day, baby. The king loves you. OK, what if he was the one I sent you, the cool girl? Is it in this folder? Is the last one in there? Oh, just close on her. OK, if you can't do much more, I understand sometimes these are too heavy. It's pretty exhausting.

It's an emotional that really has made you tender, sick of your fucking bullshit.

Thank you for fucking being me. Tick tock. What's up? This is how my dating app. You think I'm cute. You like fat bitches, you're above eighteen. Hit me up. Doesn't matter what gender we can work with, whatever it will go in my mouth. Either way, why don't we link her with the king.

Fucking perfect. Yeah. And what a beautiful one close to. Thank you Christine.

Well I just thought it's rare that you see a cool girl. We deal with a lot of cool guys. Yeah, we sure do. The girls are a rare commodity. Yeah. Yeah. Oh, my God. Cody, would you answer an ad like that where she's like, I don't give a shit, whatever. If you were single. I mean, obviously with kids obviously. Yeah. Yeah.

You know, I you know what I think tick tick tock is weird and how much it is a dating app.

That's really. Yeah. Yeah definitely there is dbms. Yeah.

Yeah, yeah. But I mean the amount of public horniness on tick tock I know is astronomical.

I know it's so much more than Instagram, Twitter and Twitter. It's bad sometimes Twitter. It's like you get, you know, old dudes like publicly Jack in their day.

Jack Yeah. Yeah, yeah. Pictures of it. Yeah.

Yeah. Oh do you know. Yeah. You saw what you what what you're responsible for. Right. What did you see the WhatsApp group this morning.

No. Oh why don't you open it. Oh OK.

Sorry. Is this what the Clynes. Um yep.

And no the other one. It's the, um, there should be some activity, OK? Was this, uh, Lance Smith on Tech Talk? So what you're asking me not give me this.

Come on, man. What's up? I never get notified. I make my notifications are always off. You guys have got to get telegram. Is that the new thing? Yes. Best telegram. So this is a wite. Yesterday she sent that right.

I have at least two thousand of these in my DNA. Oh, right. Right. But then go to the conversation. Go to the conversations.

Kreiss, what does it say?

Um. And what is after what you mean what. Ethan. Yeah. None of your fans were circumcised. My feedback would be for him to get circumcised. Back up, though, how it starts. I'm so scared.

Kristina asked our fans to send her dick pics. Yes.

Yeah. Oh yeah. That's right. I said what they did. They did it. Yes, so what her dams were just filled with. Yeah, she's like, I got thousands of dollars. Christina Yeah. Oh, no.

Oh, I'm sorry, Whitney, I don't know. People actually of people will do it unprompted. Yeah, so if you tell them no one really likes story, send it to her, do it. Yeah. Got a text her. Yeah.

And the best part is that you are unaware we're all having this conversation for an hour and you're in the group. I know.

I just don't get notified. All right. That was really horrible. Those are some big dicks. That's what we're talking about, some huge dictionaries.

But now is that truth or is that just scale from.

Well, some people were saying scale, but, you know, I think there's some real, real talent in there.

From what I could see was did not look like my fagbug.

Have you sent people your your d? No. Never, never. Never done it. How do you get hit up? You know, you're a good looking guy. You're successful. I mean, they know you have a girlfriend, but you still get hit up by.

No, not not anymore.

But used to because I'm you know, our relationship is very public and I feel like people know that we're deeply in love. So they're doing so well.

Yeah. OK, you got to show your shot, I guess. Fucking who cares. Yeah.

Yeah I no, but people know, like I, I don't know, it used to happen and now it doesn't happen anymore. But I just thought I don't know Fatta or something like that. I used to get like like Topix. Yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah.

They send their vans or the whole.

No not not vaj just agist really a for a chick to be like here's my purse. Yeah. That's Super Agrio.

That caption too. Yeah. Yeah. I want to see my purse.

I mean I'm trying to imagine though if you're a guy and like someone just like you like to snatch, you're like I like this.

I think that like just the fact that you sent me. This means you are way too much of an animal, right.

That's what I thought I'd hit you with my hand while a real quick before. Yeah. It's like. Well, because like just a Yeah. A floating snatch. Is that attractive. Like just a disembodied vagina. Oh that's right. That's what's her name did. She did that like a couple of weeks ago.

Who. Trish. Oh she posts.

But that wasn't what it was. That was a public. Yeah. That was a public post like on Twitter or what.

Like here's really. Can you pull it off. Well it was so I went to see it.

You watching their podcast. I want coded. It is unbelievable really. It's unbelievable.

I love Ethan's open disdain for her. Like to her face. Yeah I know. It's he's like oh god. Yeah he's. Oh my God. Ethan dressing like that girl.

That's one guy look like that's that's her asshole pic. But you scroll down a few more. I didn't realize it was like this like.

Oh yeah, a little bit more. You're almost there. There it is. She posted that she said, who's eaten, yeah, 18 plus new pussy like Invid you can't look away at. That's unbelievable. Yeah, and that's what you're missing out on by being your stupid relationship. God, oh, my God, I want to just die. I want to just turn. I mean, it's it's just so open. You know, like it's like everything.

I'm good. Hold on. I like to dissect why is it so I mean I mean open as in like it's it's so like unashamed, unabashed. Here's my whole shit. Mm hmm. Yeah.

Yeah. She don't give a fuck to not give a fuck. She don't give a fuck the way like a senior citizen doesn't give.

Yeah. Yeah exactly. Yeah. People in the locker room. Yeah. Like a guy in his 70s. 80S maybe you're like in New York. He didn't, he didn't care at all.

There was a dude that you said like we saw some shit in the locker room because our pool was at a public or it wasn't a public gym but was like a membership gym or whatever, huge gym.

And so in college or in Calgary, Oakland County in high school. So we would see some shit in the locker room. That's like seven year old dudes just blow dryer. Yeah, right. That's pretty standard. There is always this one guy that had a giant dick like, you know, soft eight inch dick, and he had barbells like piercings all the way down the side of his dick.

And then like Prince Albert and then in high school, he.

No, no, no, I wasn't in high school. Shit. All right. No, no, no. He was an older and older gentleman. Yeah, I yeah. I mean, he does some with his dick.

I don't know. Did you guys ever talk to him? We never. We've been looking at your dick for a year. Yeah. You fuck with. Can you just put it in. He's like, oh here hold it.

Like yeah it's got some real weight on my solid, very dense Jesus.

Yeah.

So Cody, do you have other do you have planned what's next for Cody.

What is next for Cody.

I'm just going to live my truth you know. Yeah. And try to keep surfing. Just keep surfing. Yeah.

You it I'm going to try and keep making stuff as much as I can. We do, you know we do music and we do a lot of shit. So yeah, I keep trying to do as much shit as boss. Do you have.

And this is known. I'm sorry. I don't know. Do you like, do you want to create like feature like movies and television. All that stuff too.

Or I want to do everything you do. Yeah. I love like a new challenge. Yeah. And I'm not the best actor writer in the world but I'd love to get better at those things. Yeah.

You enjoy doing. And so yeah I would. Yeah. Yeah. I would like to get a role one day have auditioned for about a thousand things. I've never gotten a single unit the best. It's amazing. Yeah. Feels good.

Yeah. In auditioning is fun. It keeps you humble.

I think I have, I've auditioned you know whatever 20 times and off of an audition. I've booked a couple commercials I think, I mean it's been a long time but everything that's like a like a real part, it's only been from somebody that wanted to hire me.

Yeah. Yeah. No way. I only never been fired from an audition. That's so funny. It's like what are we audition people?

Because it's the same thing for me. Like the only real role I've ever had is real brother of Simi Valley. And that's just because Jimmy I know of friends with them hit you up. Yeah. Yeah. Maybe you want to be in this. I was like, absolutely. Yeah. And now it's season season three just happened and it's been amazing. That's awesome. But I don't know, I'm just maybe I know in the room.

No, I don't know what it is. I actually got a little peek.

I mean, I feel like I got a peek into how it works when one of the directors that hired me was something we started talking about casting. And he was like, you know, it's essentially a miraculous to get a part in something.

And B, he goes, you know, you can kill and us or the producers or the studio can just be like, that's now like you could you could do like objectively the best audition. Right. And they'll be like Kennedy, like we want black hair. It make sense that the guy would look like, yeah.

Like they'll do shit that you won't even consider in choosing someone for the role, you know, like.

Yeah, but you know, we want the guy to be like six five. Yeah. Yeah. So you're like, oh, why didn't you just only see people like that. I don't know. Just to see what else is out there. Yeah.

I did want I think I almost got one role from an audition and then they hit me out the producer or something like that and said, oh the person we cast to be your love interest looks too young so we can't. There you go. Yes. You anymore. Yeah.

It's like that's I mean, that's like one of the reasons why I started doing everything else is that yeah. I was like, I cannot let my future rest in the hands of these people that I don't even meet. I can't even fucking see them. Exactly.

No, I agree. It's the best. The Internet is the great equalizer. Yeah.

And the way to do it is like is what that's that's what I think everyone has taken from the last few years and seeing how how you can be in control of what you want to do. Yeah. And, you know, in stand up, all these guys now started self producing specials, as you should. Yes. Sort of be like some hey, you know, all the platforms didn't give me a call to do a special great. Yeah.

Shoot one and put it out yourself. Totally. And then you're seeing that those are working is translating into millions of views and then that comic is selling more tickets like it's exactly what you want to happen. So yeah.

Um anyways, man, I really appreciate you coming. Thank you for taking so much for having me. A lot of fun. Awesome. Yeah. As I said, I'm a huge fan of you guys. Thank you very much for having me. I mean, the best you guys can make. Yeah.

Thank you. Keep an eye on. You'll stay. He is good a surfer as me. I will make another Darmanin video. I want to be in it. Oh yeah. Hey when we end here, I want to show you another one. OK. OK are going are closing. Song is Cool Guy Megamix by Bart Simpson. Thank you for. You're always making great great songs.

Here we go. Don't bring anyone into this. I speak good English, I speak English, you do not speak, you know, you do not do you would be one to talk through here and you are. Oh my, my. OK, guys, let's do some dancing. Will you ever day your mom just like the gays? Ruff, ruff, ruff, ruff, not to go to school. How do you make the personal development is very hard.

I'm like, oh, my God, I got my my I want to go for dinner. I don't even check the price of the bill. My card always works. Hey ya, man.

Man Hey, this is Josh. Good morning, Julia. It's me, Joe. Let's go full throttle. Let me get you one time goes by. Don't let me be fucking ok. It's right here.

How many are real. Still walking Mermaid Beach.

You got your guys you want to fuck with my like I'm a fucking cure all, you can eat my meat any time you want, baby. This is real. Not everything in my life is a joke.

You see, a woman are sitting on my face, live your life and fuck all the dignity of every cool stuff. Like stuff. Neat stuff. She did, she did, she did I take fucking 30 mandrel one night when I fucking want to get on with the conversation? You ruined orgasm because I didn't want to come out. I have never and want to stick my neck in front of a woman and not man forget. Oh, no more.

No more. This is the person that they live in Missouri. Please call me.

I just hope that there's some other women out there. I really like having that question. You guys are always wanting us to love their car. So also that as you go, oh, they've ever done see go out there is curious about eco sex and, you know, take, you know, say, look, maybe you wanna buy some things for free when you fuck fucking my mom to shut the fuck up. I promise to keep it sexy.

I promise to keep it gangster. This is hard rock, Rick. But TransCanada Highway goes down at. The big farm Summerton is I am a pig pig with kids getting better than that. A very looking for. He's on all the bad guys step up, hoping to come out with a positive outlook on Mark, don't be stingy when it goes by itself is a good one.

What? A person loses their mistakes.

I just couldn't I can't get the Association for Retarded Citizens. I.